Subject: Answers to irritate people :)

>>>

>>>

>>>Heehee, some are real funny!

>>>

>>>"Did you take a bath?"

>>>"Why, Is there one missing?"

>>>

>>>"Are you chewing gum?"

>>>"No, I'm John Smith."

>>>

>>>"I want to buy a dress to put on around the house."

>>>"Yes, Madam. How large is your house?"

>>>

>>>"What are you going to be when you graduate?"

>>>"An old man"

>>>

>>>"I spent three years in college taking medicine."

>>>"Are you well now?"

>>>

>>>"Do you say a prayer before you eat?"

>>>"No, we don't have to. My mother is a good cook."

>>>

>>>"I've got a surprise for you, honey. I brought a friend home for

>>>dinner."

>>>"Who wants to eat your friends?"

>>>

>>>"We are having mother for dinner, darling."

>>>"Make sure she's well done."

>>>

>>>"I want some rat poison."

>>>"Should I wrap it up or do you want to eat it right here?"

>>>

>>>"It seems that everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the

>>>other."

>>>"Well, I guess that's why I've got two ears."

>>>

>>>"May I hold your hand?"

>>>"No, thanks, It isn't heavy."

>>>

>>>"Does water always come through the roof in this place?"

>>>"No, sir, only when it rains."

>>>

>>>"When will you straighten out the house, dear?"

>>>"Why? Is it tilted?"

>>>

>>>"Do these stairs take you to the second floor?"

>>>"No, you'll have to walk"

>>>

>>>"Now that you're married, you should have some insurance"

>>>"But why? My wife isn't dangerous."

>>>

>>>"I have changed my mind."

>>>"Thank heaven! Does it work better now?"

>>>

>>>Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?

>>>Customer: What other colours do you have?

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