Walking Home by Emerald

Busy footsteps and noisy horns populated the streets of Japan on these weeks of December. The shopping rush --- the crowd of mad mothers squabbling over the last BayBlade for their sons, husbands trying to get last-minute presents for their wives, the spoiled brats whining and pining for the huge pack of Christmas candies...

On a nearby bench, Sendoh tries to regain his breath, exhausted from battling the frenzied masses. He adjusted his blue scarf, and cupped his face with gloved palms in an attempt to warm himself. The weather was a bit colder than what he would have wanted, but then again, he would consider himself as a summer person. Winter was never a favorite season of his. Sure, he'd go out to play with his siblings in the snow, making snowmen and snow angels. He'd even joined in some snowball fights, but honestly, he didn't like the feel of that cold mush on his skin. He'd rather sit in front of the fire, all nice and warm. He'd rather have the sun kissing his face, than the winds of the cold biting his flesh.

Yet somehow, winter can be beautiful. The blankets of white covering the lawns looked so pure, and something about the whole melancholy silence that it represents almost always makes him choke with awe.

He was almost lost on his memories when Dir En Grey's "Taiyo no Ao" brought him back to the present. He hastily felt his coat pockets for his vibrating cellphone.

"Hey, Kaede."

"Akira, where are you?"

I smiled at the slightly worried tone of his voice. I'm almost giddy, like a teenage girl talking to her first crush. *Sigh* If he only knows what he does to me...

"I'm on my way home, gimme about ten minutes, ok?"

"Hurry up, dinner's almost ready and it'd be a waste if it gets cold."

I swear I'm practically squealing deep inside. I'd never get tired of this side of my lover.

"Hai, hai. Sorry, I'll get there soon."

"Hmm...see you in a few, then. Shit! Akira, gotta go, the pie's burning!"

"Heh."

I have never dreamt of this life. Yes, this is now my life, one which has Rukawa Kaede in it. When I was little, I had dreamed of the usual things. I wanted to be an astronaut at one point in my life, then a policeman. Once I watched a Bruce Lee film and I wanted to be a martial artist. Then...basketball came. Late elementary and I wished that I could be like Michael Jordan and play on the NBA. That changed again when I met HIM.

That fateful practice game of Shohoku and Ryonan shattered all the goals that I set on my life. From that day on, I played basketball to be with him. I wanted Rukawa.

Oh, we were fantastic. The Ace of Ryonan against the Super Rookie of Shohoku was a sight to behold. The rivalry, the tension was sizzling, leaving spectators' eyes glued to our every move.

It's amazing that none of them got past the coy brushing of our skins, or the lustful looks that we gave each other. It was a tease, a game. Then it became too much for both of us, and we had that wild and feral sex in the locker rooms. No feelings attached, just pure animal lust.

Or so I thought.

We then avoided each other like the plague, not that it was hard to do. I mean, we weren't really on the same team, or district, for that matter. Then I realized that I missed him. I had cursed myself repeatedly for that. But many are the days when I found myself looking to my side only to see the mirage of a Rukawa trying to steal the ball from me. I would turn around suddenly while walking, because I seemed to hear a snide comment passing from Rukawa's lips. I lay in my bed and felt his kisses, kisses that I once tasted but was too foolish to hold on to.

And then I knew that I was not merely lusting after my archrival.

"Yo, Sendoh!"

He jumped at the voice behind his back. God! He had to stop daydreaming!

"Koshino, what're you doing here?"

"The usual, you know, last-minute gifts?"

His friend let out a small chuckle. Koshino does it every year, claims that he's getting into the Christmas spirit and all that. Well, whatever. It works for him, anyway. It's even amazing how he could get such nice items this late.

"Hey, love to talk, but Kaede's waiting..."

"Ohhh...ok. Wouldn't want to upset the missus."

"If he hears you..."

Sendoh shook his head, smiling, and watched his best friend walk away still in a fit of giggles.

I swear Kaede's gonna kill him if he hears that. Most people have this assumption about our...roles, but I tell you, whatever it is, it's not true. We're equals in this. Kaede is not the wife, or the "female one". It is not I, either. Frankly, I don't see the need for such...whatever. My point is, why do we have to comply with this stereotypical concept of a so-called "normal relationship" of a man and a woman? Isn't that hilarious?

Fine, so he's cooking at home now. He's just being sweet. Yes, he is capable of such acts. Most people have no idea how expressive he can be in his own ways. They all think that I'm the romantic one, that Kaede just sits there like a rock while I shower him with my undying love and affection. C'mon, give both of us some credit.

He may not speak often, but what are words, anyway? I kept telling myself that. I don't need meaningless syllables, not when I could have my Kaede cuddled to me as we watch TV, or spooned beside me during the afterglow of our lovemaking.

But last night, I knew that he whispered those "three little words" that everyone yearns to hear, when he thought I was asleep. And suddenly, those words seem to mean everything. It was at that moment that I realized that I was like everybody else, wanting the sweet nothings and romantic poetry. I was almost ashamed.

"Sendoh-kun!"

"Ayako."

I must admit that this woman is really something. A real looker, with an attitude to boot. That Miyagi really lucked out with this one.

"So are we still on for the New Year's Party, Sendoh-kun?"

Oh yeah, I almost forgot that we invented some people over for the 31st.

"Sure. Kaede's gonna be making his famed ramen. Maybe you could bring the sake?"

"No prob. See ya, and give Rukawa-kun my greetings!"

Akira simply nodded, and watched the figure sashay down the street, oblivious to the wolf whistles from the male pedestrians.

He could understand his lover's "sisterly" affection for Ayako-san. She was the closest person he had as a confidante, having not many friends in school. Of course, Rukawa had more than his share of admirers, but none of them have really tried to get to know him. He was just...there, like an unreachable marble statue, frozen on a pedestal. Worshipped, but not befriended. He was merely seen, and no one bothered to probe inside the stoic, icy figure. But Ayako did just that.

It was not an easy path, and I still cannot believe that we have gone this far. Sometimes I still feel like this dream bubble is going to pop, and reality will soon hit me hard. Kaede had trouble sorting out his emotions at that time, I did too. He had a difficult time accepting what he truly wanted, what he was. He did not want to jeopardize his future career, whatever it may be, just because of a "phase". I think that was what his shrink told him, the stupid prick. His self-confidence started to wane, and I didn't want that. Then Ayako stepped into the picture. That girl could really make it big in the psychiatry field, and we could never thank her enough for being an instrument in bringing us together. If she hadn't taken the time to talk some sense into Kaede's head, we would probably still be apart and miserable.

I would not be walking...no, running home, anxious to be in the arms of the one I love. I would not be hearing my heart beating in my ears, as I hurry through stop signs and zooming vehicles. I would not be holding on to my coat pocket, occasionally feeling the small box to make sure it's safe. I would not be thinking about what I'm going to say when I come face to face with Rukawa Kaede, I would not be this nervous wreck, palms sweating despite the freezing air.

"Hey."

The utterance of a single word spoke the volumes of meaning I could see in his features. It was...everything. It was not just an acknowledgement of my presence, but a welcoming of love, of a future, of a life...together.

"Merry Christmas, Baby. I'm home"

And I am, indeed. I look into his blue eyes, and I almost choke with awe. I kissed his soft lips, and warmth overtook my being.

-end-