Our scene opens with Raptor and Wasabi still on Hobo’s Party bus.
They are sitting down, watching Phantom on TV bagging Wasabi, the wWo, and
Raptor. Raptor is aggravated, while Wasabi gets that all too common confused
look.
Raptor: Dude! He thinks I’m another follower!
What a prick!
Wasabi: Chill out, I think he just worked out
why I get so confused all the time! *gets a confused look on his face* It’s all
those missed Hang-Times!
Raptor: That was totally not cool! And Timmay
is just some stoner prick, I’ve beaten him already- For an extreme title
shot!!!!!!
Raptor: it just shits me, that’s all. They’re
both taking us WAY too lightly.
Wasabi: Yeah!
Wait!
Hold on-
We’re preparing for our match on a party bus!!!
Raptor: We still take them seriously though,
don’t we?
They
both start giggling. Then they toast to a drink, still laughing, and begin
chatting again.
Raptor: Ahhh, you’re right. No big deal. A
stoner with some guy addicted to helium singing his theme, and a creepy loner.
Wasabi: That’s why Phantom doesn’t like the
wWo, because he doesn’t socialize.
All
of a sudden, the bus screeches to a halt, and the engine makes grinding noises.
Raptor: AHHH! Crap. Hobo? What’s happening?
Hobo: Dunno homay! Gimmie two seconds, ill
check it out.
Wasabi: Sweet! Well I hope we get to the
arena on time.
Hobo (entering
the bus again): Got
it! My cousin was stuck in the fuel tanks. *dragging in a fuel soaked hobo onto the bus, then
yelling:* Okay!
Everyone do me a favour- No fire!
Raptor: Right. So what are we going to do
about this whole HCT and Phantom thing
Wasabi: What? Hairy Circus Tentpeg? EEEEHHH,
who cares?
Raptor: Wasabi… Mate, you really have to quit
it with the HCT thing. Its over used.
Wasabi
(with one tear running down his face): Right then.
Raptor: I think I’ll cut a promo. Where’s the
handycam?
Hobo: Billy and Chuck are using it in the
toilets again.
Raptor: Again? Damn it! They’re like rabbits I
tell ya *there are
groaning and moaning noises in the background* You know what? I think I’ll cut this
promo outside. Ahh, does anyone have a spare camera?
Hobo: Nooo, but we have a radio
broadcaster, you could always send a promo to the EMF with that.
Raptor: Cool! Give it to me.
Hobo: You didn’t say the magic words.
Raptor: Sorry. Hobo rules.
Hobo: That’s better. Here you go.
He
takes the radio outside, and starts trying to contact the EMF.
Raptor: EMF, EMF come in… This is Raptor, Come
in?
Unknown: So, when do you think we should bomb
Australia? Over.
Raptor: AAAhh, that’s not it. EMF, Come in!
Unknown
2: Lech huck. Micha
chawa de pasa.
Raptor: Jabba, I told you, I’m not a star wars
fan. (searching again)
Unknown,
but very familiar: Oh
yeah! That’s the stuff…
Raptor: BILLY!?
Unknown
but very familiar: Sorry,
got to go!
Raptor: This is getting frustrating. EMF, come
in!
EMF: Yeah, this is the EMF receiving.
Raptor: Cool, I’m gonna cut a promo, tape it
for me.
Phantom, I
betrayed you for a good reason. I betrayed you because you’re an anti-social,
ugly, smelly freak, and who wants to hang around someone like you? Frankly, I think
the thrashing I gave you was justified. Timmay, MY ASS I cheated. I won, fair
and square. I pinned your ass 123 for the Extreme title #1 contendership, to
which my shot is coming up soon. And no one, not you, not phantom, not cobra,
No one can stop me from getting my grubby paws on that title. Phantom, you know
what the sharpclaw impaler feels like… Get ready to taste your own blood again.
And Timmay, this weekend, you will fall victim to the hunt. For the claw is
mightier than the bong.
EMF guy: Okay, I just found a tape.
Raptor: AAAAAAAAAAhhh crap! Okay, repeated….
Scene Fades to black