|
Raptor’s theme music: |
Upcoming Match |
Other People Used |
People Mentioned |
Titles Held |
Record |
|
Raptor vs Hearing Impaired Metal |
The wWo, Bustyo Assboy |
Dead
Metal, Scott Mann,
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Attitude World (2 and Last Ever) Extreme (1) |
8-4-1 |
Role-play Background:
It’s time for a history lesson, class!
6/1/02- Def Metal v Raptor 1- Raptor loses his title after only
a week.
6/15/02- Def Metal v Raptor 2-Def Metal loses his title after
only a week.
7/6/02- Def Metal v Matt Dragon v Raptor- Disqualification.
7/20/02- Raptor v Scott Mann: Special Guest Ref- Def Metal-
Raptor kicked both their asses, then proceeded to get rid of the TAW titles
that Scott Metal and Def Mann love so much.
So, that means we’re 1 match down each, and that effectively
means this thing is the rubber match (Not a condom match, you pervert, the
decider match of our feud). Who is the better “mann”? It’s been a big few weeks
for the two- With run ins, back-stage beat ups, lame “Iron Man” jokes, Mann and
Metal fondling each other, and the big one- The one that makes it personal- The
destruction of the TAW titles. Yes, the Attitude titles are no more, due to
Raptor, and after giving Scott Mann and Def Metal the beating of their
lifetimes, Raptor isn’t holding anything back. It’s time to go Iron man style,
and we’ll truly see who has more endurance, power, and pain resistance out of
the two men.
Setting the
Scene: Well, hmm…
How should I start this part? I could have him in a metal plant, but… meh, it’s
been done. I could have him in a clown suit, doing a children’s party… In fact,
that sounds kinda cool, why not…
Raptor: Caus it’d be Dero, that’s why not.
Oh, ok then. Well, how aboot…. Aww, I
dunno, you pick.
Raptor: Um… How aboot… At home. Just for
starters, then we’ll move from there.
All right. Our scene opens with Raptor,
sitting at home, on his couch, alone, as Toby is out, probably getting laid.
He’s wearing a “Scott Mann + Def Metal = One Screwy Baby” T-shirt and a “Scott
Mann Swallows” hat…
He is sitting, staring at a TV screen, as
we hear a nice, boring, slow monotone, flowing from the TV. Raptor is obviously
trying to stay awake, and also looks a little nauseous, and is struggling. The
door opens, as Wasabi and Hobo burst in. They stare at the screen, in
disbelief, in shock, at whatever Raptor is watching.
Wasabi: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!?
Hobo: Oh My GOD!
Raptor: Well, Iron Man matches require extreme
endurance, and, well, there’s nothing harder to endure than this.
The camera spins around to see Ashlee cutting a promo on the TV screen
Wasabi: *Vomits* I don’t care how much endurance you
need- that is inhumane!
He turns off the tape, and we see
everybody’s favorite element- Mr. Metal, yapping on aboot his whatever gothic
crap he’s up to now. Nobody really cares, until he says something quite
peculiar. Raptor and Wasabi both cringe at the saying, and Wasabi gets his
Confused™ look. Def Metal seems to mumble out something like...
I DON’T CLAIM TO BE ANYBODY
Raptor: Um… Did he just say what I think he
did?
Wasabi: He doesn’t claim to like his body?
Hobo: “I don’t claim to be crap and shoddy”?
Raptor: I thought it was “He doesn’t claim to
be Hardcore Holly”…
Wasabi: What, is the guy having a fucking identity crisis?
Hobo and Wasabi go home, confused, to talk about Wasabi’s match.
After the astounding revelation that Dead Meat-al
DOESN’T CLAIM TO BE VERY HORNY
Raptor thought he had better investigate.
Raptor: This is a job for… Sir Winalot!
Toby: Dad, that’s a shit name!
Raptor: Huh? Oh, you’re home?!
Toby: Yeah, well, I tried to get laid, but it
turns out this chick, well… She’s a transvestite- or so she says…
Raptor starts laughing uncontrollably..
Toby: You didn’t?!!!
He just keeps laughing…
Toby: YOU NEVER LET ME GET LAID! *He storms off, annoyed*
Raptor: Well, that was $100 bucks well spent.
Now, as I was saying… This is a job for-
SHERLOCK RAPTOR
HE CLAIMS TO BE A PRIVATE EYE
He takes off his “Scott Mann Swallows”
Hat and puts on a detective hat, and runs out the door, commando style, ready
to run another crazy investigation.
Later that day
Our scene opens with Raptor, sitting in a
car, outside Def Metal’s house. He just sits, staring at the house. Eventually,
he picks up a pair of binoculars, and stares through them at the house, and
then writes some notes in his notebook. He picks up a tape recorder, and
presses record.
Raptor: Hmm… Midday, still no action.
As soon as he says that, a head pops up,
right in front of Raptor’s window. (This is where you are supposed to jump,
because you’re surprised. YOU ARE!). And Raptor jumps from the surprise But, he
calms down quickly, because it’s
HOBO
HE CLAIMS TO BE THE WORLD’S RICHEST
POOR MAN
Hobo waves to Raptor, walks around to the
passenger side of the car and hops in.
Raptor: Holy shit man, you scared the crap out
of me- I thought you were Blind Metal or something!
Hobo: Yeah well, besides that, what the fuck are
you doing, you loony case?
Raptor: I’m on a stake out! So shh! You can be
my partner. I’m staking out Def’s house.
Hobo: Why the hell would you bother?
Raptor: Well, to be honest. I’m trying to work
out… Well, you know how Def says
I DON’T CLAIM TO BE ANYBODY
Hobo: Is he
having a fucking identity crisis?
Raptor: And
you know how he’s always got it in the big letters that glow?
Hobo: Huh?
Raptor: Oh…
Um… Nothing. Anyway, nothing much has happened at this place.
Hobo: Yeah
well, that’s because you’re looking at Prez Mike’s house- He’s in Iraq! Def
Metal’s is next door, you fool!
Raptor: What?!
Oh Shiz… I’ve been watching this for nearly ½ an hour! Damn. Well, I aint seen
much happen from either house… I think we should bust into Def’s place…
Hobo: Umm….
Is that legal?
Raptor: Section
5 paragraph 4 of the United Nations constitution- the wWo can do anything they
want.
Hobo: Ahh
yeah! That’s right- I paid off a lot of people for that rule. *Flashes his pearly white rich man grin*
They hop out of the car, commando style,
carefully, watching, to make sure no “Menn” are watching. They cross the road,
and as they approach the house, we spot someone familiar, down the street… He
is making out with some girl… Raptor spots him, and goes ballistic. He runs
towards him, knocks out the girl, and walks back, dragging whoever it is by the
ear. We see….
TOBY
HE CLAIMS TO BE A 16 YEAR OLD THAT
WRESTLES
Toby: Shit man!
Raptor: No getting laid for you!!!! Now help us
bust in to Dead Meatal’s house.
Toby: Is that legal?
Raptor: Secio-
Hobo: Stop it! Yes, it is legal Toby.
Toby: Aaaannd…. Why are we bothering with this?
Raptor: Well, I’m investigating why Def Metal
says…
I DON’T CLAIM TO BE ANYBODY
Toby: What, is he having a fucking Identity
crisis?
Hobo: Yeah, that’s what I said. Come on, let’s
go!
All 3 of them run towards the house,
commando style. Raptor kicks the door down, as they run through the house, but,
unfortunately, they find it empty. Raptor pulls out his magnifying glass and
starts searching for clues, while he hands Hobo the powder to find
fingerprints.
Raptor: Aha! A clue!
We see a note on the kitchen bench saying
“Gone to Colonic irrigation clinic, back in a couple of hours”
Toby: Shit Man!
Hobo: Hehe, looks like Defy needs some
de-clogging before your match. *Walks off to check the bedroom*
Raptor: He may be a “Metal Man”, but that
doesn’t stop him from getting constipate-
Toby: Don’t finish that sentence. Please don’t….
Hobo: *Yelling from the other room* Ugh… guys!? Um… I just found a empty pack
of condoms… and…. Er… it’s got both Mann and Metal’s fingerprints on it!
Hobo runs out of the room, disgusted. Suddenly,
we hear sirens, as Sherlock Raptor and Hobo look stunned, as Police run through
the house, pointing pistols at them. They take them, cuff them, and drive off
in their police cars…
Later that day…
We see the 3 prisoners arrive at a police
station. They walk in, and they stand in line, to see…
BUSTYO ASSBOY
HE CLAIMS TO BE A SEARGENT
Bustyo
Assboy: Well, well, well…
We got a report of some suspicious characters hanging around that house. Making
strange groaning noises.
Raptor: Hehe, it was probably Def Metal and
Scott Mann in the bedroom…
Toby: Umm… Dude, we can’t be arrested.
Hobo: I AM ABOVE THE LAW! *Takes out some gel and slicks back his
hair*
Bustyo
Assboy: So you claim
that you weren’t the ones making those sick animal moaning noises?
Hobo: No, damn it- We don’t live there!
Bustyo
Assboy: Oh! I see! You
were breaking and entering instead?
Toby: Well, yes, but-
Bustyo
Assboy: No buts! Chuck
em’ in the slammer, boys!
We hear a loud voice shout “NO! WAIT!” as
we see two familiar faces enter the station… it’s
RACHEL
SHE CLAIMS THAT SHE’S NOT A SLUT
and
WASABI
HE CLAIMS HIS BAGGAGE AT THE AIRPORT
*Wasabi whispers in the Narrator’s ear*
Oh, sorry
HE CLAIMS TO BE THE LEADER OF THE WWO
Wasabi: You can’t arrest these people! They’re
wWo members!!!
Bustyo
Assboy: Huh?!
Raptor: Sectio-
Hobo: Shut up, Raptor! You can’t arrest us!
Toby: Shit Man!
Bustyo
Assboy: Why the fuck
not?!
Raptor: Section-
Hobo: I said SHUT UP! *Hits Raptor*
Wasabi: You can’t arrest them. Look we can talk
aboot this…
The scene fades to black, and after aboot
an hour of explaining to the dim witted sergeant why the wWo members can’t be
arrested, the scene fades back
Bustyo
Assboy: Hmm… I see.
Well, I still have one question… Why were you in Blind Metal’s house?
Raptor: Oh, that’s easy. We were investigating
why he says…
I DON’T CLAIM TO BE ANYBODY
Rachel and Bustyo Assboy collectively: What, is he having a fucking identity
crisis?
Wasabi, Toby and Hobo
collectively: Yeah,
that’s what we said.
Raptor: I have no clue why he says it.
Bustyo
Assboy: Hmm… Well, I
suppose I’ll have let you go.
Everyone starts leaving, but Bustyo
Assboy grabs Raptor and holds him back
Bustyo
Assboy: Um…. Can I
come?
Raptor: Yeah, sure, but… You’re pants are on
fire.
Bustyo
Assboy: What?!
Raptor runs off giggling, before Bustyo can do anything. He puts his Sherlock Raptor hat back on, then hops in his car, and drives off…
Later that day…
We see Raptor and Hobo pull up outside a gay nightclub. Hobo looks at Raptor weirdly (a look that is nothing compared to the weird looks Matt Dragon got after his little pig/corpse/unrelated babble speech). Raptor looks a little embarrassed…
Raptor: Well, you see, I’m still on the hunt
for why Def says
I DON’T CLAIM TO BE ANYBODY
Eddie Gurrerro:
*Walking out of
the Gay nightclub* What
esse? Is he having a fucking identity crisis homes? *Walks off to find another quality queer
hangout*
Hobo: *Yelling after Eddie* That’s what I said! Anyway, Rapy, what
gives, you decided you like the company of men *Starts to creep away slowly*
Raptor: No man! You know how Scott Mann and Def
Mann are practically related-
Hobo: Ahh! I see… Their kinda place right? Well,
we can hope they’re in here. If not, I’m outta there faster than you can say…
KAZZOOSHWHAMPOW
Raptor gives Hobo the “are you more loopy
than Matt Drag-queen” look, then they walk in.
Later that day…
We see Hobo and Raptor, hopping back in
their car. Raptor is holding his cheek, and we see a big hand print from where
Raptor has been slapped.
Raptor: Okay, okay… So how was I supposed to
know Billy Gunn and Scott Mann were high school lovers?
Hobo: I dunno, but it’s even weirder how they
auditioned for the spice girls together… Can you imagine that? Mann Spice? *Shudders*
Raptor: Could be a possible opening for Ashlee.
Raptor starts the engine, and the
cameraman hops in the back seat frantically. Suddenly, the engine stops, and
Raptor and Hobo look at the cameraman as if to say… No.
Raptor: Um… Can I help you?
Cameraman: Uhhh…
Hobo: He’s dirtying the upholstery!
Raptor: Oh god! Hobo at least lay down some
newspaper before he soils himself!
Cameraman: Can I come… Please?
Raptor: Ahh, yeah. Sure buddy… But first, your
pants are on fire!
Cameraman: Oh no, I’m not gonna fall for…
We see Hobo, crouching under the camera,
lighting the guy’s pants on fire.
Cameraman: HEY!
Hobo: SCARPER!
Hobo jumps back in the car, and they speed off. Unfortunately for Hobo and Raptor, who expected some privacy, before he left, Prez Mike decided to put cameras in every singe EMF superstar’s cars, homes and toilets (don’t ask why)
Raptor: Shit man, I am so sick of these
cameramen and their “Lack of privacy” policy- Shit- I mean they EMF goons even
strapped a camera to Wasabi’s dog- The poor thing died from the weight. Why
Hobo? Why?
Hobo: We are a rare breed Raptor my friend. And
unlike Ashlee, people actually want to see us.
Raptor: Well, you know what they’re gonna see
Hobo? You know what they’re gonna see?
Hobo: Undertaker in a bikini?
Raptor: NO! They’re gonna see me, pushing it to
the max, raising the bar, beating Def Metal after an excruciating 30 minutes.
He may be named after metal, but inside, he’s all gas. He’s a fuckin windbag I
tell you- He yabbers and yabbers, and he just doesn’t stop with his talking and
his gothic shit. If Matt Dragqueen is right aboot 1 thing, it’s that all those
stale TAW leftovers should be fed to the pigs…
Hobo: Umm… That would make him right aboot 2
things- The pig/corpse crap, and the TAW being crap.
Raptor: Okay, okay, he’s right aboot 2 things.
But I tell you what- Def Metal won’t be right. I’m gonna make sure he’s wrong,
bitch. He’s so gothic and… Zombie like.
His monotone,
his creepy non-claiming to be Def Metal… For Christ’s sake, if you’re not Def,
then who the hell are you?
Hobo: Barbara Streisand?
Raptor: No, she may be a nobody, but she’s not
Def Metal nobody. He’s so… Evil at heart. Just like that puppy drowning devil,
Scott Mann…
Hobo: He drowned the puppy I was going to give
to Wasabi for his birthday!
Raptor: Def Metal and Scott Mann- You know…
Those two are pretty tight. In fact, I think they’re probably so tight…*Starts rocking back and forward, his eye
twitching in disgust*
Hobo: Snap out of it! *hits Raptor out of his disgust-induced
trance*
Raptor: Sorry, what was I saying? Oh yeah. He’s
gonna be Dead Metal when I’m finished with him. I don’t care how many times I
have to pin his ass. I don’t care how many shooting star presses, how many
sharpclaw impalers, it doesn’t bother me. The only thing that will bother me,
is if Def comes anywhere near beating me. He may not claim to be anybody, but
damn, after this, he can sure as hell claim to have fallen victim to the
Raptor’s Rampage.
Hobo: Hmm… Interesting and unusual- Having a
monologue in the middle of a promo instead of at the end… I like it. Anyway,
where to now, *Puts on
a really big happy face* Rapy?
Raptor: I don’t know, *with his own Happy face* Hoby! Why don’t we go back to your
place, and we can look over our clues- Maybe we can solve this mystery once and
for all…
Hobo: Rehididididy *That’s a Scooby Doo laugh for all of you
dyslexics out there… Wait, you couldn’t read this either, could you?*
They drive off, into the sunset…
LaTeR ThAT DaY…. (What, you didn’t think
that was the end, did you?)
We see the guys (and Rachel, who is not a
guy, or a slut, just for the record) hanging out in Hobo’s mansion. Raptor and
Hobo are lurking over the bar, where the clues they have collected are lying.
Raptor: Hmm… Very interesting.
Hobo: Yes… Indeed. But- Sherlock Raptor, don’t
you think it would be even better if WE ACTUALLY GOT SOME CLUES!?
The camera zooms in on the bar and we see
nothing but a cockroach and some Viagra, which Hobo quickly notices and slides
away discrepantly.
Raptor: Oh. Um… I suppose, my dear Hobo. But
you know the point of this Hobo? Why do you think he says those words?
Wasabi: What, *Puts on a fake Arnold Schwarzanegger
accent* I don’t
claim to be anybody?
Hobo: Why the hell do you say that so weird?
It’s not like that, it’s like this.
I DON’T CLAIM TO BE ANYBODY
Wasabi: Oh, sorry. I get it now…. Ahem…
I DON’T CLAIM TO BE ANYBODY
Hobo: That’s better. Sorry, what did you say
Raptor?
Raptor: Why do you think he says that phrase.
The non-claiming one?
Hobo: I have ab-so-lutley-no-fuck-ing-god-damned-clue.
Raptor: EXACTLY MY DEAR HOBO! EXACTLY! You see!
This is what I’ve worked out! Nobody does! What the hell does it mean? Why does
he say it? And what has it got to do with wrestling?! That’s the sort of thing
you say when a policemen asks you what your name is after you’ve robbed a bank!
It makes absolutely no sense, and there is no point to it! Now you understand,
don’t you? Just understand that you can’t understand. It’s like trying to read
Japanese, it’s impossible. Nobody can do it, apart from Wasabi, who’s name was
originally Japanese.
Wasabi: Japa-what now?
Raptor: Don’t worry. His catch-phrase is
pointless. So is his on-screen relationship with Scott Mann- All you see is
them winking at each other and hinting what they’re gonna do when the camera
stops rolling! *Hobo
sings Rollin’*
It’s pointless! Just like DEF METAL! He is pointless. His and Scott Mann’s
purpose was destroyed when TAW went down the drain, being sliced up by the
metal swirly thingies that- aww, never mind. Def’s career was all aboot TAW,
and now, Def’s career is pointless. It has as much meaning as Gillberg on a
merry-go-round. It has as much intellectual content as the XFL. It’s got less
class then the Brady Bunch movie, and it’s got as much Charisma as Brock Lesnar
hosting cabaret! I know it, you know it, now the world knows it. But,
unfortunately for Metal, I’m gonna have to teach him. Yes, I’ll get some chalk-
I’ll shove it down his throat. I’ll get a pointer, I’ll shove it up his ass.
Then I’ll sit him down at his little desk, give him the same little speech, and
smash the fucking whiteboard over his pointless little head!
Hobo: Okay Raptor, your homicidal tendencies
remind me of a certain transvestite…
Raptor: Sorry Hobo. Oh, and never compare me to
Mr. CEO of the nWo wrestling federation. It’s not the EMF anymore. It’s not
about fun anymore, is it? It’s all about the nWo showing off and upping their
baseless little egos. Well, you know what I say? Fuck them. Fuck Shawn, fuck
Primebeef, fuck Dragqueen. I won’t say fuck Tazz, because I don’t want to be
accused of being a pedophile.
Wasabi: NICE ONE!
Toby: Shit man!
Raptor: If Drag Queen has a problem, then he
can bring it. But after my match with Def. That is the no 1 priority. I will crush
his spirit. I don’t care if I have to beat it out of him, I don’t care if I
have to tickle it out of him. I’ll do whatever it takes. I am an iron-man, and I
have my limits, but by god, you can push those limits all you like Def. You can
take me to the edge of the earth, up to the heavens above or, hell, to the
deepest of Canada- oh, and If we go there, Sabi man, I’ll say hi to Arkie for
you.
Wasabi: Oh, yeah, thanks- Tell him I dropped
his kidneys off with the army, they’ll send them by air-mail
Raptor: What, Air Mail to the deepest of
Canada? As if Canada has an airport! But back to my topic- Def man, you’re
first win against me made you cocky. You’re ego went into the nWo zone, and
that’s past the clouds, past the moon and mars, and touching Uranus… Just like
Scott Mann does… *Ba-dum-ching*
Yes, you’re first
win sent you off into la la land. But then, I sent a massive nuke, and blasted
it back down to earth. You lost. Fair and Square, 1.2.3, the last ever attitude
champ would like a cup of tea, thank you Mrs. Mann.
But after
that, you couldn’t leave it well enough alone could you. You ever heard the
phrase, “Quit while you’re ahead”? Not “Quit while you’re getting head” because
I don’t want to cause any marital problems between you and Scott. It’s “Quit
while you’re ahead” Instead, you had to keep it going. It couldn’t just die like
it should have. We could be onto better things… Well, 1 of us could. I could be
going for the EMF world title, and you could be cleaning the toilets at the
Nightclub I hear you love so much. But NO! Def Metal had to confuse the ref and
battle Raptor up the ramp. Screwing over himself, and Matt Drag-queen. And for
what? So you could get the title? Guess what- Do not pass go, do not collect
the Attitude World title- Your bullshit cost you the prize. Your richest prize.
And now all that’s left to do is get revenge, right? To get even? That’s
something I’m never gonna let happen. I swear to god, I swear to Mike, I swear
to AN ARKIE. No matter how tired I am, no matter how many times you’ve beaten
me, or strangled me, or disgusted me, I will never… EVVVVEEEERR stay down for
the 3 count. I will never tap….
Toby: Ugh, *Cough*
ripoff *Cough*
Raptor: Huh? That cough sounds pretty bad
Tobes, I’ll take you to the doctor tomorrow *Toby just rolls his eyes* Listen, Def… Can you hear that?
Toby: Hear what?
Raptor: Shhhhh! You hear that?
Hobo: Yeah, it’s the sound of someone towing my
car! *Runs out of the
mansion quickly*
Raptor: Umm… No, not that sound… the other one…
Toby: Wasabi, Rachel, and their dog snoring from
your fucking long monologue bit?
Raptor: No! The OTHER sound… You hear it?
That’s my heart beating… Blood flows through my veins. Air flows through my
lungs. That’s what it’s gonna take Def. You’re gonna have to stop my heart.
You’re gonna have to stop my breathing. You’re gonna have to stop my very soul
to get through this man. I’m a man, like Ashlee, and to stop this Man you’re
gonna have to stop him from being a man… And once you do that, you can cut my
corpse up into 6 pieces, shave my head, pluck my teeth, starve some pigs and
feed me to them, for all I care. Because the day you feed me to pigs is the day
Canada… errr… I mean Hell Freezes over! Whether you lay down for the 3, tap
out, or whether you fall to the ground because Scott Mann looked at you funny,
the score will be in my favor. For AN ARKIE’S
sake Def- Quit while your ahead. Before you lose a head. You can punch, you can
suplex, fuck, you can get groovy and busta move on the canvas- Nothing will
stop me from bustin yo ass down to a fine powdery pulp. Because, well, as you
must all ready know… The Raptor is on the Rampage, and no
uncle-fucking-gothic-metal-pounce like YOU, Dead Metal, is going to stop me.
And my closing words? My closing words are this…
Toby: No, let me do the closing words, please.
Raptor, there’s no camera here. You just pulled a BWO and spoke to nobody, and
I mean nobody, except for 2 people, who are fast asleep, and Wasabi’s dog, who
drowned in your pool of saliva that’s been flying from your mouth. So here-
These are MY closing words. Get into the goddamned studio, and do that all
again, before I go Iron on your rectal cavity!
Raptor: Sure thing Tobes, but first, I gotta
finish promoing.
Toby: GODDAMN IT, YOU’RE NOT PROMOING, THERE’S
NO GODDAMNED CAMERA!
Raptor: Yes, there is Toby. Look. You don’t
think a man as rich as Hobo would have no security. *He points to a hidden camera up in the
corner of the room, as Toby goes bright red because, well… He got Rolled (Hobo
comes back from wherever he went and sings Rollin)*
Raptor: My closing thoughts? After it’s done.
After men have fallen and egos have bee- Aww, fuck this, I can’t be metaphoric.
How about this as a go home line: FUCK YOU DEF. FUCK YOU, AND YOUR UNCLE.
Toby: No, that’s crap. And please, lay of the
bad language, I’m young and impressionable.
Raptor: Oh yeah. Well, this then. F*CK Y0()
DEF.
Toby: That’s better.
Raptor: Rain, Hail or Shine, Defy boy. I’ll be
waiting for your demise. Remember, the clock is ticking, and I just
supercharged it so it ticks a hell of a lot faster!
Toby: Aww man, that was a crap line!
Raptor: Okay, I’ll edit that out. Def… I’m on
the Rampage. And no matter what you throw at me, I’ll catch it and throw it
straight back at you. Remember that song “Anything you can do, I can do
better”? It personifies our feud. I’ll 1 up you. And at survival of the
fittest, the fittest will survive… Duh. And of course, the Fittest is ME! When
the fans have left. When the boys have packed up and gone home, when the ring
and the stage is taken down… There will be only 1 thing left in the arena. Def
Metal, sitting in his locker room, crying to himself. I’m not going to stop for
you Def. I’m never gonna back down. The winner will truly be an Iron man, and
you may be named after metal- But when it comes down to it- You’re a weak ass
pile of flesh. And it’s flesh I’m going to destroy. Remember…
THE RAPTOR IS ON THE RAMPAGE…
Raptor: Ahem, sorry. I mean The Raptor is on
the Rampage. And I’m unstoppable. Def… The giant iron fist of mine is coming
for you. Get ready.
The scene fades to black as Raptor looks
intensely at Toby, who gets a little scared and runs off to cuddle up to Hobo…
Aww, isn’t that cute?
