Upcoming Match	Other People Used	People Mentioned	Titles Held	Record
Stable Wars Match, BWO vs wWo	Hobo, Toby and Wasabi	The BWO	Extreme Title (1)	5-2-0

Our scene opens with Raptor driving in a car. Where to, who knows… Probably not even he knows. But he spots Hobo busking on the street with a Piano Accordion, so he decides to pull over to see his buddy.

Hobo: *singing* It’sa not so bad, it’s a lovely place, ARGHHHH! SHUTTUPA YA FACE!

Raptor: Hobo, why are you busking? Making much money?

Hobo: Mon…. ey?

Raptor: You don’t play for money?

Hobo: Do I look like I need more money? I’m singing to scare away park-goers from this park behind me so I can develop it into a zoo…

Raptor: Oh, I see…

As if on cue, a huge crane carrying a zoo comes along and plonks a zoo right onto the park behind Hobo. The only casualties were 3 monkeys and a rabbit.

Raptor: That’s impressive… Quick construction!

Hobo: Yeah well, when you’re as loaded as I am, the sky’s the limit! Actually, change that to Saturn’s the limit… I tried to go to Pluto but the logistics of a trip like that just didn’t work for them.

Raptor: Who?

Hobo: *surprised* NO ONE!!! Nothing, I didn’t say anything… He he! Yeah… But anyway, wanna come take a look, I hear there are a few good Ashlee look-a-likes!!!!

They walk into the zoo, and start to walk around… They come upon a Mongolian Pig-Chode…

Raptor: Hey, I guess Wasabi didn’t just make that name up!

Hobo: Nah, it’s really just a BWO fan in a bear suit. He came up to me and said I was crap, so I jobbed the guy.

Raptor: Nice one!!!

They high five, and move on. Raptor sees some guy with a BWO t-shirt on, so he spits in his face and keeps walking on. Soon they arrive at the Warthog cage…

Raptor: Ahahah! It’s Ashlee!!!!!!!!!!!

The warthogs all throw up at the mention of Ashlee, not to mention the Warthog Keepers, and all tourists standing around…. Hobo pulls out his walkie talkie…

Hobo: Uglee Ashlee clean up crew, section five! We’ve got about 50 people here that heard her Name…

Raptor: Maybe I shouldn’t have said that so loud…

Hobo: Said what?

Raptor: Ashlee!

Everyone, including Hobo and the Warthogs, throw up again

Hobo: Stop saying that!!!

Raptor: Saying what?!

Hobo: Ashlee!

Raptor, the Warthogs, the Warthogs keepers, and the tourists all regurgitate for the 3^rd time in 30 seconds…

Hobo: Okay, we really have to stop this now….

Raptor: Stop what?!

Hobo: No! Not again!!! The cleaners allready have a hell of a job!!!

Raptor: Hey man, I really wanna cut a promo, k? So come and promo with me!!!

Hobo: Nah man, we can’t, there’s no cameraman around!

Raptor: So what!? That never seems to stop Badd Boy or Ashlee!!!!

Badd Boy, there are so many times I could of just ran out and interfered in your matches. There are sooo many times that you have annoyed me, or pissed me off. But I’ve resisted. I’ve resisted because of—

He realizes that nearly half of the people in the zoo are staring at him as he talks to himself as if he’s talking to Badd Boy. Everyone looks at him so weird, in fact, that he changes his mind and stops…

Raptor: Fine!!! Just Fine!!! Why don’t you people ever stare at Badd Boy when he does it? Hmm!? Oh well.. Hey, Hobo! Is there an elephant cage around?

Hobo: Yeah, sure thing man, walk this way…

They keep walking, and on the way, they see someone familiar…

Raptor: Hey Toby!!!

Toby (walking up): Hey pops, whatta you doing here?

Raptor: Question is, whatta you doing here! I thought Wasabi was looking after you?

Toby: Christ! You are sooo over protective, I’m sixteen dad! Jesus!

Raptor: Watch your fucking mouth!!!! *he hits Toby*

Toby: Piss off! *gets hit again* Okay! Okay, damn it *Raptor goes to hit Toby, but Tobes dodges it* Stop it! Anyway, Wasabi is here with me!

Wasabi walks up to see them

Wasabi: Hey guys! I was just taking Toby here *Ruffles Toby’s hair* to see some examples of Ash-

Raptor and Hobo: NO!!!!!! Don’t say it!

Toby: God that woman… Wait? Woman? Or man, whatever she is, is gross and Jazz-like!

Raptor: yeah, I know, just don’t mention her name… It scares the Animals… Anyway, come see the elephant with us!

Toby: No thanks man, I got a date tonight I gotta get ready for! All the guys reckon I got a good chance of getting laid!!!!!!

Raptor: GO SON! Hey hey! Just use protection, allright?

Toby: Sure thang… *He Half-Dances, half struts away like a pimp daddy, winking and pointing at everyone on the way*

He and Wasabi walk off, and Hobo and Raptor go to the Elephant

Hobo: Haha! Aww, that things ass is still smaller than Uglee’s!

Raptor: The only thing with a bigger ass than Uglee is Rosie O’Donnel.

Hobo: Hehe! Rosie O’Donnell… haha… Hmm… Haha! AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

He cracks up, laughing at the thought of Rosie O’Donnel’s dismal career. Soon, he gets up, and gets over it.

Hobo: Ahh man, Rosie O’Donnell… hehe… Always good for a laugh. Listen, I’ve got a promoing room built in to the Bird Cage, because no-one ever goes there, wanna cut a main event promo?

Raptor: haha! The BWO is going down, biatch!

Hobo: Don’t call me Biatch!

They walk to the bird cage and walk into the promoing room. Hobo gets behind the camera, and Raptor starts talking.

Raptor: Well, while my son is getting laid, I thought I might cut a promo…

Wait a sec…. My son is getting LAID?!!!!!!

He runs out of the promoing room in a hurry and Hobo gets in front of the camera.

Hobo: Looks like I’ll be cutting a promo instead. Look, if I’ve said it once before, I’ve said it a million times… The wWo is simply superior to the BWO. We have more Talent. We have more members, we have more titles, and we don’t have one uglee lady that makes people throw up at the sound of her uglee name. And when I face her, I’ll have to hold my guts in. I’m going to have to be careful, because I don’t wanna pull a booker T and throw up all over JR. Of course, the excitement of the evening will get to me, and maybe I won’t be able to throw up, who knows. All I know is that the wWo is set to kick ass… In 3 different matches. And when the dust settles from Lockdown, there will be a new world champ. A new Intercontinental Champ, a new attitude champ, in fact, they’ll be new champions for every title. And I cannot wait… It’s going to be simply awesome. Awsine. Yeah….

But onto another issue. I know Badd Boy is upset that he is being forced into this match… All my inside sources tell me he threw a fit of rage. So let me say this Badd Boy… You afraid you might lose?

Don’t you believe you can do it?

Because if you weren’t afraid then you would have nothing to worry about. So you obviously know just as well as I do, the BWO will fall this weekend… You will be closed forever. And there ain’t nothing you can do about it- the wWo is in charge now. It’s our federation. And we control what matches are up. So if you don’t like it, too “badd”! Heh, I just made a joke. But seriously… I know you’re worried… and that’s why your kicking up a stink… You’re worried you’ll lose, that’s why you cry about being in the match.

And Wes… The sulky little brother, jealous because he isn’t the world champ… But you know what Wesley Ikeda? It’s allright… Because if you’re parents were horrible enough to name you Wes, than I’m sure you’ve experienced harder times in your life than this. Seriously, I feel sorry for ya, Wes… Hehe… Wes… Oh man, that name is pathetic.

He is interrupted by Raptor dragging in Toby by the ear…

Raptor: No getting laid for YOU young man!

Toby: But daaaad!!!

Raptor: No! Now what I say goes! You have to wait till you’re eighteen at least!

Toby: But daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad!!!!

Raptor: NO! Now sit down and Promo with me!

They both sit down in front of the camera…

Toby: Right. On Sunday, at lockdown, I’m going to defeat Kiel Hardy and his gay friend Gillberg. Blaaaaaah. Can I go get laid now?

Raptor: No! No getting laid! Here, watch the master… *he pushes Toby off camera and stares straight at the lens* Right. Now that that is taken care of, onto another matter. The b… w… o.

I’m so sick of hearing their whiney voices, day in, day out. I lost… Waaaaahhh…. Big deal. And I’m also incredibly petrified of their boasting voices, because whenever someone wins, they’ll drag it on for days on end…. *Fakes a whiney Ashlee voice* Oh Tony! You won! You’re win is bigger than my title win… Hell, you’re title win is bigger than my breasts! Then, 3 days later, we still won’t have heard the end of it. I’m SO SICK of Ashlee’s god damned voice! Either way, if she has a match, you’re going to hear it. It’s either, YES! I WON! Or nooo! That’s against the rules of god, how could I lose!? And I’m FUCKING SICK OF IT! That’s why I’m in this match. To stop the complaining and whining… To stop the boasting… And to show you, Ashlee, to show you that maybe, you should try keep you’re ego in check every now and then… Lets go back to Badd Boy’s world title win, at Hell on Earth…

The scene fades in to a prerecorded skit, with some harp music playing to make it sound like it’s a memory… There we see, Raptor, dressed as Badd Boy, and Hobo, dressed as Ashlee. Toby is Wes, sitting back with his arms folded, sulking that he didn’t win the title, and Wasabi is on stilts and wearing a fat suit, playing CaRnAgE…

CaRnAgE (Wasabi): I ATE A BABY! BABY! THE OTHER OTHER WHITE MEAT!

Ashlee (hobo): Oh Yes! I won the world title! Yes!!! Hoooray!!!!

Badd Boy (Raptor): I know, isn’t it amazing, I won the world title!!!!

Ashlee (Hobo): Don’t you mean I won the world title?

Badd Boy (raptor): But I did all the work! I was the one that wrestled-

Ashlee (Hobo): Oh shut up, it was all me!!!! Me me me me me me me…. *fades out as she walks backstage, taking Badd Boy’s world title with her*

They all walk backstage, and Wasabi falls off his stilts, but bounces back up again due to the Fat suit. Toby almost gets Raptor, but dodges, luckily… The scene fades back to Raptor…

Raptor: Badd Boy wins the match, Ashlee wins another ego trip. Badd Boy celebrates, Ashlee boasts. News flash woman, No One CARES! I don’t want to know how happy you are. I don’t care if you feel great cause you’ve got a powerful boyfriend. I don’t care if you feel great because you like Badd Boy. I don’t even Damn Well care if you ARE Tony. Because, quite frankly, I’ve heard some rumors about you and the transvestite scene….

He starts dry-heaving, and Toby runs to grab the puke bucket, but luckily Raptor controls himself…

Raptor: And CaRnAgE, the giant revolving blob. My arthritic grandpa moves faster than you, you old chode. I’ve seen snails get to one side of the ring to the other faster than you, you massive pile of cow shit. You may think you’re great cause you’re the IC champ, but all that is about to change. You’re about to lose that title… Get ready for it; the moment is approaching faster than a speeding bullet. And when it does, the whole history of the EMF will be altered. This’ll be a match for the record books, I can see it already, in a couple of years time, people will be saying, wow, the wWo… They were the ones that put the BWO out of business, and took all the titles at the same time… The whole face of the EMF will be forever altered with this match, nothing will ever be the same again. One stable will be gone, and the other, will be the champions. The greatest. The absolute best of the best… And when you lose, and the wWo are proven, finally, as the better stable, Mike won’t be there to go and whine to. He’s in Iraq, remember? We’re the Prezidentz of the EMF, and don’t you forget it. Screw with us and you’ll lose your job faster than you can say “look out! It’s Ashlee! HIDE!” So when that day comes… And believe me, it will, don’t be surprised. And don’t say I didn’t tell you so. Because frankly, everyone knows what’s gonna happen. Everyone knows the fall of the BWO is coming, and nothing is going to stop that. It’s destiny really, the BWO has run it’s course. It’s old… Yet the wWo are still young! The wWo still has life in it, whereas the BWO are flat, old and boring… Used, and about to be discarded. So just make sure you don’t feel shocked when it happens, because I told you it would. And I look forward to the day, when we can finally claim, hey, we did it, we’re the best stable. Because we are.

“wWo” flashes across the screen, and then “Lockdown” does fading to black