freak me

Friday, January 18th, 2002

Today has been the scariest day of my life.

First, I started off the day by having to do a presentation in History class. And as you may or may not know, I hate speaking in public. Or, really, in front of people. Any people. But it went reasonably well. I didn't mispronounce any words too terribly, or swing my legs violently like I did last time, or just stop breathing for extended periods of time. But I also left out all the clever things I was going to say to make my class fall in love with me. I had so many jokes I would have made had I not been absolutely petrefied.

Next, I went to Philosophy tutorials, found out it was canceled, went back to my room, went to lunch, then had a nap. I dreamt that Jessa was telling me that she was pregnant with Oz's baby. Oz from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. And actually, they were twins, so that should be "babies". And I was like, "That's great, Jess. That's... great." And then she started getting all angry with me, saying, "You don't need to patronize me, you know. I'm going to be a mother!" So yeah, that creeped me out.

And then, I woke up and decided to read metafilter. God knows why. And I came across this. [Note: Meaghan, if you're reading this, I absolutely forbid you to visit that link. I swear to God, if you visit that link, I will totally kick your ass. It's not for sisters' eyes. Just don't. The rest of you, do as you will.] I don't know what's worse, though: the vampire Germans, the neo-Viking Satanists, or that creepy music on the LaVey myths site. I had to turn the volume off and turn on my pixie lights so I wasn't completely reduced to a crying lump reading all this. Why did I continue reading, then? Good question. My brain must hate me.

So now, I'm sitting in my room, with the pixie lights on and some happy Sloan playing, and everything (on my side of the room) is sparkling clean (except my dishes - should I be cleaning those?) in anticipation of Ni's arrival at 20:25. I don't know if I'm supposed to go meet her at the train station, though. And Tad and Sheena should be here any moment from Montreal. And soon someone will hug me and I won't feel so terribly, terribly alone and sad. I never should have read those articles. I'm afraid to go to sleep tonight.

Someone please mail me some love?