A History of the Thundercats: an Idiocy in Three
Pants Parts.

Jaga-one Kin-oboe, (a flute player in his spare time) led the nude nobility of ThunDERa to evacuate the planet, which was about to go Big Bada-Boom.  The king and head feline honcho, Lion-cub's daddy, refused to go with them as he'd had a major tiff with Jaga-one about the shape of the universe and was in his bedroom, sulking.  King Claw-dis, named for his short temper and predilection for upholstery-shredding, nevertheless sent Lion-oh on the planet-fleeing expedition while he slept, ensuring that an entire nude theatre dance troupe accompanied him for his afternoon entertainment.  "Jaga-one and the Thunder-clouds" so disturbed Lion-cub that he was heard to wonder:  "Why didn't those sooo-clever animators give me a Mommy? This is why I will grow up to be an anal-retentive Sooper-Hero with a bed-head."  Snark, the neutered Boo-jum of the troupe, comforted the little prince by singing a happy little song of Snarkland;  whereupon Panthro the nude trombonist kicked the snark up his furry backside.
[End of part one]

The lion-cub grew large and stupid, and roamed far and wide with his snark in tow;  also he carried the Giant Toothpick of Claw-dis his daddy, which contained the Red Third Eye of the Bad Hangover, which opened whenever the lion-cub was naughty and lectured him about the nastiness of extinct liquors.  The snark hated the Toothpick, but nevertheless admired the kooky metal design and copied it for a heated towel-rail.  The noble nude troupe, nude no longer by the decree of the Oboe-one, settled down on a planet like ours in a galaxy nearby, building beautiful buildings and vehicles that could be sold as toys in a galaxy they never knew about.  Panthro became second in command to the lion-cub after a well-coordinated smear campaign alleging that Tiber Stripy-head had stolen candyfruit from Lion-oh's secret gubernatorial slushfund.  Amid all the brouhaha, Cheet-Lara didn't know whether to be happy or sad. At least now she could ting her triangle in peaceful contemplation of her life not-to-be. RuntyKid and RuntyKad filled all their days with merry pranks, and laughter at the antics of Panthro the ganja-smoking jazz guitarist, strumming on only five strings and loving it. And there was not a cloud in the Thunder-sky.
[End of part two]

But there came a day where there were discovered berserker Pie-rats on the happy planet of Lion-cub's domain, and the snark foretold bad times.  The snark usually did, because there were no more Boo-jums in the universe and he was grumpy, but this did seem to forebode disaster.  Mr Horrible Hat the Flying Circus toiletpaper salesman (double ply) zooming over the kitty litter dump behind the Cat's Lair saw his reflection in the berbils's ammonia-scented swimming pool and added his scream to the general atmosphere: "Mummmmmyyyyyyy!"  Wicked mu-mert-ants and space-ship captains with nasty Nazi accents caused endless trouble for Lion-oh and his band, as they couldn't finish rehearsing the Nude Mikado due to all the interruptions.  And the snark, content in the evidence of a correct prognosis, curled up in the sun and pronounced:  "Indeed, for I *was* a Boo-jum, as you see."
[End of the third part]

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