EPISODE NINE – KINGS AND QUEENS

INT. ARMSIDES’S APARTMENT

Armside is dressing up in a nice suit. Lydia is watching him.

Lydia: Can I come?

Armside: No.

Pause

Lydia: Can I come?

Armside: No.

Lydia: Can I come?

Armside (getting irritated): No.

Lydia: Can I-

Armside: No! No, no, no, no, No!

Pause

Lydia: Can I come?

Armside starts sobbing in his sleeve.

TITLE CARD: KINGS AND QUEENS

INT. RED STAR OFICE

It’s evening and only Valentine and Remington are there, both smoking. Valentine is dressed smartly like Armside was, and is lying down on a table.

Valentine: I’m not looking forward to this.

Remington: You keep complaining about it, so why the hell are you going anyway?

Valentine: I can’t back out now. It seemed like a good idea at the time.

Remington: I’m sure she won’t say anything incriminating.

Valentine: Maybe if I hide in a corner somewhere…

Remington: Shouldn’t you be off to pick up Elli? You have to be there in forty-five minutes.

Valentine: Yeah.

Remington: Have fun.

Valentine gets up, stubs out his cigarette and makes for the door like a man walking to the electric chair.

INT. VALENTINE’S CAR

While Valentine drives, Elli is reaching over from the passenger seat and spraying his jacket.

Valentine: What’re you doing?

Elli: Getting rid of the cigarette smell. I thought I told you to quit?

Valentine: Don’t start with me, Elli.

Elli: Here, chew this.

Elli stuffs a piece of gum in Valentine’s mouth.

Elli: Don’t you get embarrassed by it?

Valentine: I’m too busy getting embarrassed by you.

Elli looks cross.

Valentine: I’m just kidding. But if you think I’m bad, just wait till you see all these people here. It’s where I picked up the habit.

Elli: Are you sure you want to go? You seem very reluctant.

Valentine: The Hell? You’re the one who pushed me into going along with it and taking you!

Elli: Yeah, but if you don’t want to go, then that’s your decision, not mine.

Valentine: Oh, how I wish that were true.

Elli: Well, we’re here now so we might as well have fun! ^_^

INT. GLASS BUILDING

Valentine and Elli are in the elevator, heading up the top of a skyscraper. The view is like a fountain of coloured lights, the city below shining like a diamond.

Elli: This is a really nice area. How come we don’t come here more often?

Valentine: This is the very heart of the city, the Crystal Triangle.

Elli: Hey, that’s not an answer!

Valentine: I lived and worked here for more than twenty years, and I got tired of it in less than five.

INT. GRAND HALL

Inside this Grand hall is hung a banner that reads “Happy New Year! KGB Reunion!”. For some reason, there’s a camera crew filming proceedings, finger buffets, bus boys bearing drinks and multitudes of ex-KGB agents with their families, some being interviewed. One of those being interviewed is Armside. Lydia pops out from behind him and he shoves her head down so she subsides back behind him. Valentine enters with Elli and is blinded by a flurry of flash photography. Some guy comes and greets him.

Peacock: Marco Valentine! Long time no see, my old man!

Valentine: Hey—you!

Peacock: Marshall Peacock!

Valentine: Hey! Awesome! (Peacock hugs Valentine) Oh, ok, all right. How are you? Who else is here?

Peacock: Well… between you and me, most of the good ones are still in disgrace… but we have some good ones here. Rae, Armside, Mota, Kennedy. And of course, Neville. Beaufort is no show. I guess he’s too good for us now. Hey, where’s Su?

Valentine: Su is… we’re no longer together.

Peacock: Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that.

Valentine: No, it’s ok, look; this is my fiancée, Elli!

Elli: Hi!

Peacock: Oh, pleased to meet you! You remember my wife, Sheila?

Valentine: Hi, Sheila.

Sheila: Hello, Mr. Valentine.

Valentine: It was good to see you again, um, dude. I’m just going to say hi to some of these other folks! (to Elli) I’m going to go save Matt; he looks like he’s in difficulties…

Armside is drinking heavily. Valentine comes up to him.

Valentine: Hey, partner. What’d you bring Lydia for?

Armside: She wouldn’t stop bugging me about it, so I just wanted to shut her up.

Valentine: I think there’s a medical name for that. Look, your kid’s over there causing trouble now.

Lydia appears to be agitating a group of elderly men.

Armside: My kid? She’s your kid! You’re the one who brought her in!

Valentine: Yeah, but she specifically asked to live with you.

Armside: Don’t go bullshitting me now!

Valentine: It’s the truth. And you know… you don’t have to pretend with me.

Armside: Yeah… yeah, I know.

They look at Lydia who is eating.

Armside: Sometimes, when I look at her, I’m reminded of my own family. Of the good times, you know?

Valentine slaps Armside on the back.

Armside: I’ll tell you though that girl is still the most irritating juvenile in existence.

Valentine: Have you been interviewed yet?

Armside: Yeah, I was answering questions on autopilot. Same old, same old.

Valentine stops a busboy and takes two glasses. Then he raises them.

Valentine: Still got mine to come. Sounds like I’ll need lots of this.

Elli is sitting in a corner next to Lydia who is chattering excitedly. Valentine comes bearing drinks. He offers a glass to Elli.

Elli: No thanks, I don’t drink.

Valentine: Hey what’re you talkin’ about, you drink all the time.

Elli: Not anymore. I quit six months ago.

Valentine: You were drinking with me last week.

Elli: No, you were drinking and not paying attention to me.

Valentine gives the glass to Lydia who runs off with it. Valentine scratches his head in confusion.

Elli: Why don’t you go socialize some more?

Valentine: I never liked big dos like this. They always used to be excuses for something bigger.

Elli: If you dislike them so much, why did you agree to come?

Valentine: …women! Tch.

Neville: What about us?

Elli: Hi?

Neville: Hello. Marco.

Valentine looks terrified.

Neville: Aren’t you going to introduce us, Marco?

Valentine: Elli, this is Jane Neville. Jane, Elli.

Elli: His fiancée.

Elli shakes Jane’s hand.

Neville: How are you enjoying the event? I organized it.

Elli: It’s very nice.

Neville: I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself. I’d better go check on the other guests. (starts to walk away, but then changes her mind and comes back) By the way, Marco, I hope you aren’t leading this girl on. I know you took my dumping you last year pretty hard, but rebounding so many times in the space of twelve months is not healthy, you know.

She walks away. Elli has her mouth open in shock. Valentine is stoic.

Elli: Is---this-

Valentine: She was just kidding. Ha-ha. What a joker she is.

Vahe stumbles up, looking drunk.

Vahe: Hey, did I just see Jane go past? How did she take you dumping her last year, anyway?

Elli gets up and runs away. Valentine stands up; his facial expression is unchanged, and he slaps Vahe on the back of the head. He starts to follow Elli, but is barracked by a camera crew.

Valentine: Excuse me.

TV Personality: We’re ready to interview you now, Mr Valentine!

Valentine: I’m sorry, I can’t right now, I really have to go.

TV Personality: It’ll only take a couple of minutes!

Valentine tries to get past but fails.

BREAK

INT. RED STAR OFFICE

Remington sits at a desk, doing paperwork, filling out tax forms, etc. It’s a fine way to spend New Year’s Eve. The phone starts ringing. He answers.

Remington: Yeah.

Elli (O.S., sounds upset): Nick, can you come and pick me up right now?

Remington: Uh? Why? What’s wrong? What happened?

Elli (O.S.): I’ll explain later, just please come now. I’m at some building, the Glass Pillar or something.

Remington: Yeah, I know. All right, I’ll be there soon.

Remington hangs up and continues his paperwork. The phone starts ringing again. He answers.

Remington: Yeah.

Mysterious Voice: Do you know who this is?

Remington: Hey, Mowbray.

Mowbray: Man, you’re not supposed to say my name over a bugged phone line! What are you, stupid?

Remington: My phones aren’t bugged.

Mowbray: All phones are bugged. Anyway, some info for you, but you’ll have to move quickly on this one.

Remington: Your usual cut?

Mowbray: You got it.

Remington: What’s the scoop?

Mowbray: We’re after a guy called Michael Corradi. There’s and official word out yet because he is expected to be caught tonight, but the reward will be posted at $8million if it does not come off.

Remington: Good God! What’s this fool gone and done?

Mowbray: Not that I know, but does it matter? It’s the specific order of President Shadowhite. He wants it dealt with fast.

Remington: I’m just trying to figure out the catch.

Mowbray: You only have about three hours to make your move. Our own agent is a very skilled retriever. He’ll be in the Glass Pillar.

Remington: Really?

Mowbray: Good luck. (Hangs up)

Remington hands up and starts putting on his coat. The phone starts ringing again. Remington puts it on speaker phone and continues preparing to leave.

Remington: Yeah…

Valentine (sounds irritated): Has Elli called you in the last few minutes?

Remington: ??Um, why??

Valentine: Never mind.

Remington: Hey, what’s going on? You still at the Pillar?

Valentine: Yeah. Nothing’s going on, everything’s fine.

Remington: Listen, I just got some red hot gossip.

A mug shot of Corradi comes through the fax machine and Remington picks it up.

EXT. GLASS PILLAR

Valentine and Elli stand outside. Elli pretends not to see Valentine.

Valentine: Elli, do you realize how immature you are being? (pause) Come on, all that was ages ago, it’s not even relevant to us now.

Remington arrives on his motorcycle.

Valentine: And even then, we were on a break at the time, remember.

Elli clobbers Valentine with her handbag. Remington gets up then takes a file from his bag and hands it to Valentine. Valentine leads Remington away from Elli and talks in a low voice.

Valentine: Take her home; I’ll deal with this myself. Take my car; it’s parked in the west lot.

Valentine hands Remington his keys. Remington nods, hands Valentine a gun and leavers with Elli. Valentine looks to the sky then focuses on the file.

INT. GLASS PILLAR

Valentine enters and sees Armside and Vahe laughing it up with a few others. Neville is not in sight. He turns to exit again but Lydia pops up in front of him.

Lydia: Hello! Good morning! How are you?

Valentine: You ok, child?

Lydia: Can I have some money for drinks?

Valentine: Isn’t it all free?

Lydia: They don’t think I’m old enough to have any.

Valentine: They have a point.

Lydia: Please?

Valentine: You come with me first; you can earn that money, eh?

Valentine and Lydia exit.

Valentine and Lydia are checking rooms in the upper levels. Eventually, Valentine hears thumping noises from a room at the end of the corridor. He draws his gun, ghosts towards the door, kicks it down and enters. Lydia pops up in front of him.

Lydia: Freeze, motherfuckers!

Neville is in the room, which incidentally has an Aerosmith calendar on the wall, and she has handcuffed Corradi. Neville is stunned solid by Lydia’s screaming.

Valentine: Jane? Corradi!

Corradi uses the distraction to run, barging past Valentine. Valentine runs after him. Neville snaps out of it and also starts running. Lydia follows. The winding nature of the steps Corradi runs up makes it difficult for Valentine to get a clean shot. Neville runs out in front of him, but he barges her into the wall and she trips over. Corradi hits the top, but has difficulty opening the door. Valentine pistol whips him.

Corradi: Don’t let her get me!

Valentine: I have no intention of letting that happen.

Corradi: She’s crazy! We only had one date and she’s already trying to kill me!

Valentine: Oh, really? (A big grin develops on his face) Is this true?

Neville: What are you up to these days, Valentine? Surely you’re not so rusty in the head you believe him?

Neville has her gun aimed at him.

Corradi (to Valentine): She’s crazy.

Neville: Step aside. You do not want to be implicated in my arrest of a wanted fugitive.

Valentine: Why do you hate me so, Jane? There was no need to bring all that up down there.

Neville: I was just saving that girl from herself/

Valentine: Like you ‘saved’ my wife?

Neville: You can blame me all you want, but Su didn’t leave because of me, you drove her out all on your own.

Valentine: What do you want now? Me?

Neville: Hardly. I’ll have you know I’m married now.

Lydia is crawling up behind Neville.

Neville: It’s you who can’t keep away from me. No one forced you to come here tonight.

Lydia bites Neville’s leg, making her fall and screech out in pain. Now the tables are turned and it’s Valentine aiming at Neville.

Valentine: What does Shadowhite want with Corradi?

Neville: It’s not your business anymore.

Valentine: Well, I’m taking him. It seems there’s big money to be made from him, eh? Don’t try my patience by interfering.

Corradi: Dude! I thought you were gonna help me! And I totally didn’t know she was married!

Valentine: $8million. What did you do?

Corradi: Well… it might have involved armed robbery. But it was all a big misunderstanding!

Neville: Ever the mercenary, eh Valentine? Well, I have an army of agents in this building that I can summon with a click of fingers. You’re not going anywhere.

Valentine: Don’t be ridiculous, Jane.

Neville stands up and finds her gun has been stolen by Lydia.

Valentine: I’m sorry I ditched you the way I did. But my Elli is important to me. I’m glad you have a new man, and I hope he’s the guy for you. But furthermore, I just hope you’re not rebounding on the wrong guy again.

Valentine drags Corradi up by his collar.

Valentine: We’re gonna go now. We’re going.

Valentine, Lydia and Corradi head down the stairs. Neville sits down and stares off into space as though she’s suddenly become catatonic or something. Below, there’s a mess of voices as Armside seems to have turned up and is yelling boisterously. After a while, the voices die down. Valentine comes back up alone. He sits beside Neville.

Valentine: It’s almost midnight. Do you want to open the New Year alone?

Neville shakes her head.

Valentine: Me neither.

EXT. STREET NIGHT

Lydia rides Remington’s Honda home with Corradi.

INT. VALENTINE’S HOUSE

Valentine gets in, it’s almost six. Elli sleeps. Valentine heads for a guest room.

END – EVERYBODY HURTS

Episode Ten Preview

Valentine: It starts with a song. One from my heart, belonging to me yet it’s not my voice. Emotions revealed, then lost. And no matter how hard we strive; in the end we lose it all, out secrets, our lies, our friends, our wives. All you can hope is that at the end, you still have control. Next episode, Lick and a Promise. Now get out there and win that crowd.