| PART 6 I head towards the cafeteria with Max and Michael on my heels. When I'm mad, I have the tendency to speed walk. Why was I mad? You're not mad, you're just hurt, I answered myself back. You know he wasn't looking at his schedule. He was looking at a drawing of some girl. I did see that much. Again, I ask myself why am I hurt? Why do I care, for that matter? We only met each other a few hours ago, so him lying to me shouldn't affect me, right? Then why is it? I'm brought out of my musing when Max takes hold of my shoulder. I turn around and yell, "What!" When I see the surprised look on his face, I smile and soften my voice to say, "I'm sorry, I'm in kind of a hurry and I shouldn't have taken it out on you." He smiles at me while gently squeezing my shoulder and says teasingly, "It's okay. I was just trying to get your attention to ask if you could slow down. For a short person you sure can walk fast. I was having trouble keeping up with you." I have to smile at his comment. "So you think I'm short, do you? Just don't underestimate us short people you never know what we are capable of," I say, teasing right along with him. I glance over at Michael to include him in our conversation, but he looks like he wants to be anywhere but here. I feel my heart drop. He's probably thinking about the person that was in that drawing. She's probably someone special to him. That thought makes my heart sink even lower. What if he does have someone? What if he has a girlfriend back in New York that he was, or still is, serious with? Why do I even care? I'm asking myself all these questions not realizing that I'm still staring at him. Max brings me out of my self-interrogation by saying, "Whatever you're thinking about must really be intense, because you've been staring at my brother for a while." I quickly turn my head towards Max and ask, "Was I?" I can feel my cheeks start to warm up. I look down and utter, "I didn't realize." I take a deep breath and say shyly while looking up at Michael, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to stare. It's just that I have a lot on my mind. I'm also sorry for the attitude I displayed earlier." I regain my composure, and to help lighten the mood I add, "If any of you tell anyone I apologized I'll deny it. I have a rep to protect." Max chuckles and asks, "What kind of reputation do you have to protect?" I turn around to continue our walk to the cafeteria, where I know there is an impatiently waiting Maria. I reply mockingly, "I'm known as the queen of bitches around these parts." "I don't see how that's possible," Max responds smiling. "Believe me, you'll see it sooner or later," I say as I give him a sly smile. ************************************************************************ Let the games begin, I think to myself as we head towards the cafeteria. Max is already putting his charms to work, and she's eating it up, just like every other girl. They are joking and having fun amongst themselves, oblivious of me. I think back to moments ago when she was staring at me. I was excited at first because I thought she was looking at me, but when I got up the courage to look into her exquisite brown eyes, it was like she was looking through me. I started to feel self-conscious. It felt like she was looking into my soul, almost like she was trying to find answers to questions she only knew. I looked away; I had to. What if she sees things that I'm ashamed of? Things I wouldn't want her to know about me. Do you hear yourself, Evans? You're acting like she can read minds or something. You're acting like she gives a crap about you. She must care if she apologized, right? Keep telling yourself that, Evans, she's probably just being polite. We enter the cafeteria, and I spot Isabel with Liz's brother. There are two other people, a guy and a girl, sitting at the table. I follow Max and Liz to the table, where the girl jumps up and runs up to Liz talking a mile a minute. Liz says something to the girl and she calms down. She grabs Liz's arm and drags her to their table. Liz turns and looks at Max and me and says, "Max, Michael, this is Maria and Kyle." The girl, Maria comes up to us and says while shaking my hand, "It's nice to meet you. Isabel's been telling us all about you guys." I roll my eyes and look over at Isabel, and she just shrugs her shoulders. I curtly say, "Nice meeting you." She glances at Liz and raises an eyebrow. Max says while extending his hand to her, "It's nice meeting you." He turns to Liz and says, "She must be the friend you were talking about." She gives him one of her beautiful smiles and again the jealousy poursover me. I leave their friendly chatter and go over to sit by Isabel. ************************************************************************ "Maria, calm down, I'm here. I know I'm late. We can get started on your review, but let me introduce you to these guys first," I say, a little flustered while being dragged by her to our usual table. I swear she can be a handful sometimes. After the introduction, I noticeMichael leave our group and sit with his sister. I guide Maria towards the table where she already has her books scattered everywhere. We begin on her review. When she finally feels confident enough about the subject, we join the group's conversation. I hear Kyle asking Max something about sports. Figures. All Kyle ever thinks or talks about are sports. I glance around the table and see Isabel talking with both Alex and Michael. Actually, when she is talking to Alex, Michael keeps to himself. He must be shy, that's the only explanation I have. Maria nudges my side and I turn to glare at her. She whispers in my ear, "Michael is hot, isn't he?" I give her a confused look in response. "I saw you staring at him." I look at her indignant and whisper, "I wasn't staring at him. Iwas looking at the interaction between my brother and that girl." I'm telling the truth, not all of it, but it is the truth. "Her name is Isabel, and if she makes him happy just let it be," she says warningly. I look at her as if she's grown two heads. "All that girl is going to do is break his heart. I'm not going to sit back and watch it happen," I whisper harshly. Maria sighs and murmurs, "Not everyone is out to hurt others, and anyway love sometimes hurts." I look at her and brashly say, "Ha!" All eyes are now on me except Michael's. "What! Maria told me something ridiculous. I had to voice my opinion," I say harshly. I get up to leave, but Max stops me. Max smiles and whispers, "My sister isn't going to hurt your brother. She's not like that." I look at him and with a tight smile I frostily say, "I don't mean to be rude, but she is your sister, therefore you're biased." "I understand the protectiveness you have towards your brother, but I know she won't hurt him because she is my sister. It has nothing to do with me being biased. My sister has a warm, giving heart. I don't want to be presumptuous, but I hope they become close friends." "Why?" I ask as I narrow my eyes at him and sit down. "She deserves someone who actually cares about her, not the way she looks. I'm assuming your brother is like that." I just sigh in response. "She was known as the ice princess in our school. She never really gave people a chance, because people only juded her based on her looks, not her heart." He looks at me while saying this. I have to give him credit, he seems like he cares deeply for his sister. When I don't respond he continues by asking me, "As a favor to me, could you please get to know her first before you judge her?" I shrug my shoulders and feeling guilty I reply, "You're right, I'll get to know her first. I have no right to judge anyone." He squeezes my hand as the bell rings signaling the end of lunch. ************************************************************************ I'm talking to Isabel when she's not talking to Alex. She looks comfortable around him. Every now and then, I hear her laughing. I'm happy that she found a guy who treats her with the respect that she deserves. In the past, she'd had some real losers. Guys who only thought of one thing. That's one thing I agree with Max about, protect our sister at all costs. I glance over at Liz every so often. I don't want to be caught staring. I notice her and Maria are in a heated conversation. Then out of nowhere Liz shouts. I look down because everyone is looking in her direction. I hear a chair slide out. I risk a glance in her direction only to see Max holding her hand. My stomach drops. I feel like I'm going to be sick. They're talking quietly amongst themselves until Liz sits down and pulls her chair closer to him. Again Max gets the girl. The bell rings and I stand up. Isabel says something to me, but I'm not paying attention. I notice her giving me a concerned look before I start to head for the door. I hear footsteps rushing up beside me and hear Liz ask, "You're not going to wait for us?" I just shrug and keep on walking. I don't want to be around them when they start 'flirting'. I hear Max say to her, "Don't worry about him. He's naturally moody." I pull out my schedule hoping to drown both of them out. I'm happy there are only four more classes after lunch. I look around trying to figure out which direction I'm supposed to go. I feel a hand touch my forearm. The feeling shocks me so I jerk away, when I see that the hand belongs to Liz, I regret my action. I look her in the eyes and swear I see hurt flicker in them for only a second. That's just wishful thinking, Evans. Why would she be hurt? She slowly smiles and says, "Don't worry, I'll show you where your classes are." I just nod my head in response. "Are you in that much of a hurry, to get away from us?" She asks with a half smile. I hear Max say to her, "He's probably looking for a way to cut the rest of his classes. He's not really the scholarly type." I turn around. I don't want to know her response. I don't even want to hear it. Good 'ole Max, always there to make me look bad, I think bitterly. Time seems to go by at a good pace. Before I know it, I'm on my way to my last class. I look at my schedule and am glad that it's art. I can relax in my last class of the day. I'm standing outside my classroom waiting for Liz, so she can lead me to my next class. Someone taps me on back and I turn around. It's Liz. She looks up and smiles at me. "Are you ready?" she asks me. I just nod my head. I can't get over how beautiful she is, and I have her all to myself for a little while anyway. "I'm sorry I took so long to meet you, but I took Max to his class already," she says, still looking at me. For some reason I feel nervous. I can't say anything, much less think. "You're not one for talking much, are you?" she asks me. "Why'd you drop Max off first?" I finally get out. She smiles and says playfully, "You do speak? I was starting to think you didn't want to talk to me." I give her one of my nervous smirks. "Since we have the next class together, I figured it would be more convenient to drop him off first." "You're taking art?" I ask her. "Yeah, I needed an art credit," she replies while nodding her head. "You don't like art?" I ask cautiously. "Don't get me wrong, I love art, it's just that I can't draw if my life depended on it. I like to do my best at everything I do, but no matter how hard I try, I still can't draw," she says a little frustrated. I don't know how to react to that, so I don't say anything. ************************************************************************ "Now that I have you talking, my next task is to make you smile," I say playfully as I open the door to our class. He comes up behind me and helps me open the door. Our hands briefly touch and I feel the same surge of electricity I felt before. I can't believe how giddy I feel knowing that I'm going to have him all to myself in this class. I don't think anything could upset me right now. Our teacher, Mrs. Burns says, "I'm glad to see you're finally happy to be in my class, Miss Parker." I just nod my head and head for a table that has two vacant seats. We sit down next to each other. Our assignment is to draw the bowl of fruit that is sitting on Mrs. Burn's desk. I moan because I was hoping we'd do the history of art today and not drawing. I look over at Michael and see him sketching vigorously. I can't get over how sexy he is. Why is he not paying any attention to me? Normally I could get any guy I wanted with no problem. I can't even get him to have a conversation with me, not to mention a smile. I'm trying every, well almost every, trick I know to get him to notice me. Nothing. I get no response. I see him look up and I quickly turn back to my sketchpad and try hard to concentrate on my work. Maybe it's for the best that he's not interested in me. He'd probably end up hurting me. I think back to what my grandma always use to tell me "Listen to your heart. It will always tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear." I never understood what she meant. I always asked her to explain, but she kept telling me "You'll find out one day. One day your heart will scream out to you what it wants. Just promise me you'll listen to it." Those were her last words she ever said to me. Is my heart telling me something, now? I've never experienced this before. My heart never reacted to anything or anyone. Why now? I've always that I was 'immune' to love, that's why I never believed in it. I still don't, right? Then why does my hurt flutter every time I'm around him? Michael brings me back to reality by saying, "The bell rang. Class is over." I nod my head dumbly and gather my books, but one of them falls to the floor. I reach for it, but Michael beats me to it. As he rises up our faces are just inches apart. My heart is beating fast. All I have to do is lean forward a little and our lips would touch. Then he moves and my heart drops. "Isabel is meeting me at my locker. I don't want her to worry." he says as he moves to the door leading him to freedom and away from me. I feel crushed. What good is it to listen to your heart when it leads you to hurt? My sadness turns to anger as I walk out and head for my locker. ************************************************************************ I run out of that class fast. I have to get away. We were so close. I could feel her breath on my lips. All I had to do was lean forward and our lips would've touched. I almost did. I was afraid of her reaction, that's why I ran. You're a coward, Evans. I just don't want to get hurt. If I fall for her, all I'll experience is heartache. She doesn't like me. I'm not her type. Her type is probably someone like Max. I'm just a loser, and she sees that. I'm some charity case to her. When I glanced at her in class, she was working hard on her assignment. She didn't try to start a conversation with me. I even said something to her, and she just ignored me. What do you expect, Evans? You're a loser. I see Isabel up ahead talking to Alex. She sees me approaching and she's about to say something, but she stops. She probably sees the anger in my eyes. As I open my locker, I hear Isabel whispering to me, "What's wrong? What happened?" I slam my locker in response and head for the exit. I hear her calling after me, but I ignore her. I have to go for a walk. I have to cool down. Then I can talk to Isabel, but right now, I'm afraid of what I might say. She's the only one I have and I don't want to lose her. |