GK: Time once again for Famous Celebrities (THEME)...It's Passover and Easter weekend, and what are famous people doing? Are they spending time with their families or are they enjoying a weekend of unbridled hedonism in exclusive resorts far from the public eye? Let's find out. Mr. President?

TR (BUSH): Easter is a time of hope. And that's what we're doing at the White House. We're hoping.

GK: Okay. That's about it?

TR (BUSH): That's about it. That's all I have on the teleprompter.

GK: Good. Thank you, Mr. President. Julia Child----- what you doing for Holy Week?

TR (JULIA): Well! I just discovered the most scrumptious dishes you can make from unleavened bread! Oh, my, yes! You just soak it in brandy and light a match and ---- poof! ----- it's lovely as a stuffing or you can use it as garnish on a big ring of orange Jell-O. I call it Lots O' Matzo!

GK: Sounds great. Henry Kissinger, you have big plans for Easter weekend?

TR (KISSINGER): I'm going back home to North Dakota to visit my mother Gladys. In Bismarck.

GK: I keep forgetting you're from North Dakota.

TR (KISSINGER): That's good, I'm glad you do.

GK: Your accent isn't a North Dakota accent.

TR (KISSINGER): If I talked with a North Dakota accent, they wouldn't think I knew anything about foreign policy.

GK: Good point. How did you pick up the accent you have?

TR (KISSINGER): I have a very bad cold.

GK: For thirty years???

TR (KISSINGER): It wouldn't go away.

GK: Thank you. Tom Brokaw---- what are you up to for Easter?

TR (BROKAW): Actually, we celebrate Passover at the Brokaws.

GK: I didn't know you were Jewish.

TR (BROKAW): I'm not, but I just think it's a bigger story.

GK: The plagues and everything…..

TR (BROKAW): (NEWS VOICE) The angel of death passes over the firstborn of the children of Israel. That story, with comments from Moses, the Pharaoh, and an exclusive interview with the Lord God Almighty, coming up on NBC News.

GK: Very good. Governor Ventura?

TR (JESSE): Yeah.

GK: What are you having for Easter dinner?

TR (JESSE): It's like this. I don't think it's fair for me, a human being with a gun, to go and slaughter a pig or a lamb or cow or chicken or something, for my Easter dinner. I don't call that a fair fight whatsoever.

GK: Okay----

TR (JESSE): I couldn't enjoy eating a meal under those circumstances.

GK: I see.

TR (JESSE): The only fair game, as far as I'm concerned, is another man. So for Easter dinner, our family is going to be eating a biker from northeast Minneapolis, a fellow named Bob.

GK: Uh huh.

TR (JESSE): He's about my size, we both had knives and jack handles, and rest assured, it was a fair fight.

GK: How are you going to be fixing Bob for Easter, Governor?

TR (JESSE): We're just going to have the cheeks. The rest we're making into sausage.

GK: Well, Happy Easter, Governor.

TR (JESSE): Right.

GK: Let's talk to another famous Minnesotan, Mr. Bob Dylan. Bob, what's your plan for Easter?

TR (DYLAN): Lavender lilac ladies of the margarita midnight riding on their locomotive steeple ----

GK: Bob, you got plans for the weekend?

TR (DYLAN): Ulysses' Egyptian slippers swimming in the prune whip moonlight---

GK: Bob, I'm over here, Bob----

TR (DYLAN): Bareback corncob chickadees and cocker spaniel theologians ----

GK: Bob---- what are you doing this weekend?

TR (DYLAN): I'm playing Vegas. I'm at the tropicana.

GK: Okay. Thank you…. Mr. Rogers, do you have big plans for Easter weekend?

TR (ROGERS): Yes, I do. I'm retired now so I'm going to go out to a rib joint and go dancing afterward and have a few drinks. Yes. With Britney Spears. Do you know who Britney Spears is? Do you? She's a little girl who grew up listening to my show. She's very fond of Mr. Rogers. Yes, she is. And now she's a big girl. Yes. Do you know where your bellybutton is? Do you? Would you like to have a little ring in your bellybutton? Would you?

GK: Thank you, Mr. Rogers. No, I wouldn't.. (THEME) That's all the time we have for today's edition of Famous Celebrities.....and happy holidays, everybody.