Objective: Get drunk. That's why it's called a 'Drinking Game', Copernicus.
Rules: 1 Drink consists of one mouthful of whatever you are drinking (that can be water, soda, beer, mixed drink, etc.) Beer is the preferred beverage. A shot glass is considered 1 Drink - so be very, very careful when doing shots for your "1 Drink". Feel free to substitute shots for your regular drink if you want. By the end hopefully it really won't matter all that much. Unless you puke and someone else has to clean it up…
Take 1 Drink:
When T'Pol raises one eyebrow.
Hoshi stutters and sighs in frustration before translating some bizarre language.
It is said aloud that the Translator Program isn't ready/is not working/will need more time/is not set, etc. Basically when they mention it and it sucks - drink.
When Reed drools over a weapon. Please note this doesn't necessarily mean there is actual drool, after all we want to reach the Objective.
When Archer is reading a book (yes, the paper kind).
Whenever the shields/deflectors are activated.
When a crewmember shoots at something, stun or kill, doesn't matter. If there is a shootout with multiple crewmembers - just finish your Drink when it's over so you don't miss any action.
When Phlox says something that goes waaaay over your head. Take 2 drinks if you understand it because obviously you're not drunk enough.
When a crewmember is taken hostage by some alien race. Take 2 Drinks if they get their asses kicked before being taken hostage.
When a crewmember gets their ass kicked by any alien race at any time. Note: If there is more than one crewmember getting their ass kicked (i.e. bar fight) you must have 1 Drink for EVERY crewmember in attendance.
If a crewmember kicks some alien's ass. Don't forget to cheer wildly as well. If you don't cheer, finish your Drink. If you try to argue that that particular alien didn't have an ass - finish your drink and get the next round.
When a crewmember repeats the name of an alien race followed by a far off questioning look.
When a crewmember is eating in the galley (mess hall) and you can not identify the food. Take 2 Drinks if you can. Take 3 if you've eaten that in the last week.
When Phlox talks about one of his weird "animals" in the medical labs. Take 2 Drinks if he shows it.
Take 2 Drinks:
If the Enterprise goes into or out of Warp - hey, we want you to get drunk!!!
Whenever T'Pol starts any sentence with, "The Vulcans would have…
If Porthos, Archer's dog, is seen. Take 3 drinks if his name is said. Chug the rest of your drink if Archer is feeding the dog when he shouldn't be.
When Mayweather says the term "Boomer", derogatorily or not.
When the Enterprise (the ship) shoots at something.
When Trip makes a smart-ass comment. A good gauge if a comment from him is smart ass or not: if you are a guy and you laugh - drink. If you are a girl and you laugh because you know it's not real, even though if the male next to you said it you would slap him upside his head - drink.
When Archer is seen eating cheese.
Take 3 Drinks:
When you here, "We come from the planet Earth…" in any form, from anyone.
When T'Pol takes charge of the Enterprise.
If you attempt to repeat the name of an Alien race after it is stated/mumbled.
T'Pol gives the patented Vulcan Nerve Pinch maneuver.
Every time the late 20th century/early 21st is mentioned or anyone from this time.
When the officers (and guests) are having dinner in the Captain's quarters and someone gets poured a drink. Finish your Drink if it happens at the end of the show.
When someone speaks with a mouthful of food. Warning: Trip ALWAYS talks with his mouth full.
Take 4 Drinks:
When Trip takes control of the Enterprise.
When T'Pol lies.
When Archer kisses another person/creature/alien. Take 5 Drinks if he slips the tongue.
Finish your Drink:
When T'Pol smiles.
