Etalia's Web site
•
EIA #7: Fog on the Barrow Downs
1. What did the hobbits forget to do when the left Tom Bombadil's house?
* Fix the puncture on Goldberry the inflatable woman. Tom would be very cranky when he found out. (Sowen) ROFLMAO!
* Put their pants on. (luinfalathiel)
* Close all the pop up windows on Tom's computer. Now every tree in the Old Forest knows that those four are nothing but a bunch of PEFs. (PinkOliphaunts)
* Turn off the oven. Oops. Hope the Bombadils have fire insurance. (Aydria Elenlinn; also Carnimírië, SunnyJim)
* Put the toilet seat down. Goldberry was NOT happy. (Varda Elentari; and WhiteLadyEowyn, WhiteAslan, hatster)
* Take the gag off of Bombadil. (iowaboy)
* Bathe. They were to sincerely regret this as time went on. (Varda's Songbird)
* They forgot the elementary rule of travel: When there is a bathroom available, USE IT! (RosieLass; also Arian Ithilsar, glorfin2, Randraug, Estella Brandybuck)
* Toilet paper the house. (Just as well, they were going to need the extra T.P. after eating Barliman's chile.) (Aldebaran)
* Leave a tip. (Pukel-man and Seillib)
* Pay Goldberry for her *hospitalities* (ringers rock!; also DAS)
* Turn left at Alberquerque. (Darkstone)
* They forgot to short sheet Tom’s bed to repay him for all the silly songs. It worked out fine in the end. After Tom freed them from the barrow, they ganged up on him and gave him a wedgie. (Frodo Gardner)
* Leave the Ring with him. (Mar)
* Pack clean underwear (elfwing_angel)
* They forgot to put on their Barrow wight repellant (MorganAisling)
* The Hobbits accidently forgot to close the back gate. Rather than singing his normal tunes, Tom Bombadil was soon heard singing his own rendition of "who let the dog out?" (Miriel Telcontar)
* Bring the map and the compass. (SonOfSaradoc)
2. How were Merry, Pippin and Sam dressed when Frodo found them?
* As the Three Amigos. (Pukel-man) ROFLMAO!!!
* The fiendishly cruel wights had dressed them like elvish figure skaters. (hot water nobility)
* In beautiful gowns made of 300 hand-sewn pieces of Arabian shot silk, cut off the neck to highlight the hobbits' fine bone structure. (luinfalathiel)
* Merry was dressed as a giant carrot, Pippin as a mushroom, and Sam had a apron on. (Joelle)
* As Ewoks. (Aydria Elenlinn)
* As Bernadette, Mitzi, and Felicia. (i.e., Priscilla: Queen of the Desert) (Carnimírië)
* In grass skirts and coconut tops. Participating in their secret pasttime: Hula dancing! (LOTR_nutcase)
* They had apples in their mouths and were covered in a lovely pineapple glaze. (The Trees of Yavanna)
* Matching "I went to the Barrow-downs and all I got was this lousy t-shirt" outfits (Varda's Songbird)
* As the Merry Muderessess of Cellblock Six, preparing to perform their own rendition of "The Cellblock Tango"(WhiteLadyEowyn)
* As drag queens. Merry had been transformed into Lady Merrmalade, Pippin into Pippi Fishnetstockings, and Sam into Queen Samidala. Oh, the horror! (Anamírë; also Aldebaran, WhiteAslan, SonOfSaradoc, sherlock )
* They weren't dressed silly! That was the rehearsal for Sil the musical. ringers rock!
* Aluminum foil, Saran wrap, and a smile, respectively. RosieLass
* Barrow-wight took them to the dancing extravaganza at the "Blue oyster"... You get the picture. Eärendil The Mariner
* In polyester leisure suits of lime, cantelope and lavendar fashion colors. The hobbits later admitted that they were trying to get the wights to donate heavy gold chains and rings to complete their new look. Miriel Telcontar
* Purple mohawks with pink and green stripes and tatoos of Sauron's Eye all over their bodies. Also-- pink and gold thongs. Lady Aredhel 333
* They were dressed like the Indian, the motorcycle guy, and the construction worker from the Village People. Elwen
* As the pantomime horse Thorondun
* They were stripped to their seedy lingerie. Sam wore a pair of Rosie's red knickers she had given him as a keepsake. Merry was far from decent in a flowery thong he had stolen from Goldberry. And Pippin wore nothing but his birthday suit (he's a true Scotsman afterall). DAS
3. Who did Frodo call to come to their rescue?
* Sir Robin, The Not-Quite-So-Brave as Sir Lancelot. (Aydria Elenlinn) ROFLMAO!!!
* GHOSTBUSTERS! (Carnimírië, Miradan glorfin2 Galadlinderiel Aldebaran WhiteLadyEowyn, WhiteAslan, Aelisha, TTT Ultimate Fan, RosieLass, MorganAisling)
* Dudley Do-Right. (LOTR_nutcase)
* the fox *drum roll* (Idaho)
* The "Coalition of the Willing." (iowaboy) – don’t know whether to snert or groan
* Neo, who promptly and eternally confounded the Barrow-Wights with his observation that there is no spoon. (The Trees of Yavanna)
* Lassie (Varda's Songbird, Mar)
* Tim Taylor from ‘Tool Time’ (JessLynn)
* Mighty Mouse. His horrible singing of "Heeeeere I come to save the daaaaay!!" was enough to frighten every wight out of every barrow forever. (Anamírë Shadowen)
* Superman! It's a bird, it's a plane, it's, oh wait, it is a bird. Darn. (Arian Ithilsar)
* Steve Irwin the Crocodile Hunter. “CRIKEY… what’ve we got ‘ere?!” (Sowen)
* The Three Amigos, hence much hilarious confusion (see #1) (Pukel-man)
* Chip and Dale,Rescue Rangers! Ch-Ch-Ch-chip and Dale! (ringers rock!)
* With much reluctance and trepidation, and after stuffing his ears with candle wax, Tom. (Darkstone)
* Varda Elentari, who else? Unfortunately, she was rather "occupied" with one brother of Boromir, and sent the annoyingly chirpy Tom Bombadillo in her stead. She subsequently received quite a nasty letter from Frodo. (Varda Elentari)
* Yet another group of flippin' come-out-of-nowhere-deus-ex-machina-Elves they're everywhere! (elfwing_angel)
* Superman! No wait...he's lame...Batman! (SarcasticElf)
* Those goofy recruits from the Shiriff Academy. A helluva night! (Eärendil The Mariner)
* "PETE! Fran! Philipa! Help! I don't remember this being in the script! Hey, WTH?? What's with that creepy hand?! What the **** is that?!! AAAAGH!" (Seillib)
* Dangermouse (Thorondun )
* NOT Ghostbusters. Nor Mighty Mouse.How 'bout Glorfindel. He's not doin' anything. (SonOfSaradoc)
* Frodo sent an urgent call out to Peter Jackson, who responded by mercifully cutting out the scene, including the bit with the wights dancing around in hobbit gear singing, "We represent the Rivendell elves, the Rivendell elves, the Rivendell elves..." (hot water nobility)
4. How did they celebrate their escape from the barrow?
* Since it had been a while since they'd taken a "pit stop", they decided to exact a little revenge on Old Man Willow. (Aldebaran) ROFLMAO!
* With a feast of lambs, and sloths, and orangutans, and fruit bats, and carp, and breakfast cereals.. (Aydria Elenlinn)
* They went down to Vegas and spent all of the barrow-gold on the slots.(Carnimírië)
* Champagne, caviar, a little pate de fois gras, nothing too gauche. (Miradan)
* they all got matching commorative tattoos. (Varda Elentari)
* they ate a nice meal of TORn blob's, which they found among the treasures released from the barrow by tomy boy. (Idaho)
* With an impromptu nude rendition of "The Silmarillion: The Musical," though the obligatory high kicks gave Sam a little trouble. (The Trees of Yavanna; also WhiteAslan)
* They downed Tom's "secret stash" and were all soon engaging in Bombadil-speak (Varda's Songbird)
* By trying out their own version of the Pointy-Hat Trick. (WhiteLadyEowyn)
* None of them really remembered. Tom, however, was able to get a few incriminating snapshots of Sam dressed as a ballerina and Pippin dancing with a lampshade on his head. (Anamírë)
* Massive Skittle-eating marathon. (Pukel-man) tropical or regular?
* They thanked Ameridebt profously over a glass of wine (ringers rock!)
* The traditional "Hobbit Happy Dance" involving chug-a-lugging Gaffer’s Home Brew, flapping their arms like chickens, and setting fire to a very large pastry. (Darkstone)
* They got drunk on pale ale and zombies, then covered themselves with erasing fluid when Sam said it was called Wight Out. (Frodo Gardner)
* Little known fact: They started Fiesta Friday. (Mar)
* One word: MACARENA! (Seillib)
* A fondue and finger food extravaganza. (Miriel Telcontar)
* Since they were in New Zealand they did a nude version of the Haka. (DAS)
* They figured they had done enough work for a little while, so they went to post on TORn. It took them all afternoon to finally leave for Bree. (PinkOliphaunts)
5. What did Tom give to Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin to take on their journey?
* Books. To Frodo - "Hitchhikers guide to Mordor", to Sam - "Best of Old Forrest cuisine", to Pippin - "Lose weight by walking", to Merry - "Rohan court etiquette". Eärendil The Mariner ROFLMAO!
* A copy of The Hobbit's Field Guide to Mushrooms... can't be too careful and the goats outside the Shire just don't have a sense of humor... glorfin2 ROFLMAO!
* A loaf of bread, a quart of milk, and a stick of butter. (luinfalathiel)
* deoderant. The quickly forgot about it. (Joelle)
* The soundtrack to Silmarillion: The Musical (Aydria Elenlinn)
* Four calling birds, three Freedom hens, two turtledoves, and a partridge in a pear tree. (Carnimírië)
* Month’s supply of toilet paper. (Miradan; also elfwing_angel, Estella Brandybuck)
* A bottle of self-tanner. "Hey, ho! If you're going make exhibitionists of yourselves, my lovelies," he said, "at least make yourselves a slightly less blinding shade of pale!" (Varda Elentari)
* The fabled ivory frog of Elbonia. (The Trees of Yavanna)
* Five magic beans (Varda's Songbird)
* Tom Bombadil For President buttons (Galadlinderiel)
* Some Preparation H. Merry really didn't want to have to buy some in front of everyone in the Bree general store. (Aldebaran)
* duct tape, it'll fix anything (JessLynn)
* A GPS, which would have come in handy, but Pippin broke it. (Elwen; also Anamírë, RosieLass)
* All I can think of is... Trail mix. (Shadowen)
* The latest copies of Playelf. (WhiteAslan)
* His copy of the Lonely Planet guide to Middle Earth (Sowen)
* Bombadil waybread--One bite and you bounce wherever you go? (hatster)
* Sam: Soap-on-a-rope made of hithlain; Merry and Pippin: Daggers of No-Dozin’;
Frodo: The flail of Goldberry- "May it be a comfort for you in dark places, just as long as it ain’t around here." (Darkstone)
* Trash bags to leave at the Bree Recycling Center (you didn’t REALLY think he just left all that garbage laying out in the sun, did you?) (Frodo Gardner)
* He gave them each a hair from his chest - told them it would bring them good health and vigor. (TTT Ultimate Fan)
* Many packages of LOTR themed Underoos. (Seillib)
* A reject from his yard sale: a moving hula dancer lamp. "May it be a light for you in dark places when all other bulbs burn out" (PinkOliphaunts)