Etalia's Web site
•
EIA #9: Strider
This week, I must give some special credit to themes. It takes a great amount of skill to make five answers to quite unrelated questions all fit with one theme. And there were several posters who managed to do this including Varda Elentari, Pukel-Man, Vidstige, Seillib, and SonOfSaradoc, to whom I wish to award E.C.P’s (extra credit points) this week. I wanted to list a few of these as a collection so that you could see how they fit together with such marvelous creativity! (I don’t know if this will become a regular thing, so please don’t go get it in your heads that you must have a theme each week! This week was just too good not to recognize these folks).
Pukel-man (you killed me with this!)
1. What did Strider want in return for offering some good advice?
Umm . . . *is blank* . . .
2. Why was Sam wary of Strider joining their group?
It's . . . umm, something about cows, or something . . . hmmm . . .
3. What did Barliman Butterbur forget to give Frodo?
. . . where IS my sense of humour?
4. All that is *CHECKS* does not *UNDER*.
Not all those who *THE* are *SOFA*.
5. What did Gandalf threaten to do to Butterbur if he forgot the letter?
Seriously, did one of you guys borrow my sense of humour without telling me?
1. What did Strider want in return for offering some good advice?
Barbecue potato chips
2. Why was Sam wary of Strider joining their group?
The smell of sour cream 'n' onion chips on the ranger's breath.
3. What did Barliman Butterbur forget to give Frodo?
Microchip containing Elrond's library
4. All that is 'deep-fried' does not 'go soft'.
Not all those who 'fry chips' are 'underpaid'.
5. What did Gandalf threaten to do to Butterbur if he forgot the letter?
Turn him into a spud, slice him thin, and fry him up.
1. What did Stider want in return for offering some
good advice?
a bath.
2. Why was Sam wary of Strider joining their group?
his horrible BO from lack of said bath could be smelled from miles away- the
enemy would find them in no time.
3. What did Barliman Butterbur forget to give Frodo?
those nose plugs he had asked for for himself and the other three hobbits
(think smelly, unbathed ARagorn)
4. All that is *in ARagorn's possession* does not *,
unfortunately, include shampoo*.
Not all those who *claim to be the lost King of Gondor* are *well-groomed*.
5. What did
Gandalf threaten to do to Butterbur if he forgot the letter?
If I recall correctly, he threatened to lock him up for a week with Aragorn
"I haven't had a bath since the beginning of the third age" Elessar. Of
course, he put it slightly more eloquently:
"Most reliable Barliman Butterbur, I
Now give you this letter in confidence high
That you will remember to pass it along
And if you forget, I shall do you great wrong:
A week you shall spend in a cold, tiny cell
Locked up with he well known as "BO From Hell."
1. What did Stider want in return for offering some good advice?
* "A Whopper Value Meal and a light-up goblet with my picture on it." (Eowyn of Penns Woods) ROFLMAO!!!
* He asked the hobbits to accompany him to a remote recording studio to cut a hit record as the Soggy Bottom Boys. (Frodo Gardner)
* The answer to 31 down on his "Kings of Numenor" crossword puzzle (Varda's Songbird)
* Some of those mushrooms Pippin had been hoarding (Joelle)
* A kareoke machine (Estella Brandybuck)
* A promotion and stock options. (The Trees of Yavanna)
* A measure or two of the "special" Old Toby to refill his pipe. (Carnimírië)
* A good reference for the new waiter job at "Prancing Pony" (in case the whole King-of-Gondor thing didn't work out, y'know?) (Kendig)
* That depends greatly on to whom the advice was given....(ringers rock!)
* Less starch and more fabric softener... his breaches chafed something fierce. (Psyphon)
* A bar of soap. He had been without it for a looooong time and it was even starting to bother him. (SarcasticElf)
* A pint of ale, some fuel for his Bic lighter and a foot massage from Sam. (DAS)
* A positive remark about his manly stubble. (notlost)
* A guarrentee that neither the Thane nor the Master of Brandy Hall nor the Mayor would ever look too closely into Bree's only nightclub: ElvesXXX. (LOTR_nutcase)
* Aragorn: *fumbles Frodo's hair* Now - so much volume, yet no split ends... How come? (Eärendil The Mariner)
* Foot rubs for a month. After a very brief huddle, the hobbits unanimously decided to take Strider’s *bad* advice, payment for which only involved calling him “Aragorn” once in a while. (Darkstone)
* a bath (Varda Elentari)
* Their word they would never sing again in his presence. (glorfin2)
* All Strider wanted was to find out if it was true what they said about hobbits and the size of their feet. It’s important for future kings-to-be to know *everything* about their people. (Sowen)
* A chance to visit his girlfriend without another bloody long-winded lecture from her dad "...she must go with her own kind...yadda yadda yadda...she stays for you...yadda yadda yadda" (ShortyElf)
* He wanted his own weekly column in Shire Today, along with a corresponding radio show, “Home on the Ranger,” funded in part by commercial advertising by his elvish friends. “Lembas! One small bite…” (hot water nobility)
* A lapdance (PinkOliphaunts
2. Why was Sam wary of Strider joining their group?
* Because whenever Sam took a bite of an apple, he caught Strider sharpening what looked suspiciously like a spit fit for a pig. (Psyphon) ROFLMAO!!
* He had bad breath, and he sang way too much. (Estella Brandybuck)
* According to other sources within the company, Strider liked to hold long, useless meetings and was usually the one to eat the last doughnut. (The Trees of Yavanna)
* As strider was looking too closely at Frodo's pouch for his peace of mind - you know the ring pouch !!! (Ciars)
* Strider's mithril thong was rather a big hint... (Carnimírië)
* He always carried a copy of "Tricking Gullible Hobbits for Dummies" under his arm and looked at it frequently. (Marigold Gamgee)
* even when broken, his sword was a few feet to long (Idaho)
* He knew that with Strider around any chances he had with the she-elves would go down the drain. (mallorn leaf)
* Is that an off-brand hilt he's wearing??? OMG As IF! (ringers rock!)
* He was afraid that he would attract even more fangirls than the ones that were already stalking Frodo (SarcasticElf)
* He'd be upwind most of the time, unfortunately for the hobbits! (LOTR_nutcase)
* As a Pervy Elf Fancier, he disrupted their Pipeweed Addict support meetings. (Eärendil The Mariner)
* Not enough cutlery to go around (Kimi)
* He kept "switching accents like some 3rd-rate play-acting spy. Heir of Elendil, riiiiight. One of those accents is blarney!" (Eowyn of Penns Woods)
* Tragically, Strider reminded Sam of a previous love named “Trotter”, who had mysteriously disappeared during one of Tolkien’s many rewrites. (Darkstone)
* Because they'd already promised the baritone part to Tom Bombadil and Strider's tenor was little bit shaky. (RosieLass)
* Strider’s ability to touch his nose with his tongue was quite unnerving. Especially since he did it right after that big dramatic speech about the Nazgul. (Sowen)
* He thought Strider was making fun of his nighttime bladder control problem by calling their group the Soggy Bottom Boys. His suspicions were confirmed when Strider kept referring to an "accident" that left a ring. (Frodo Gardner)
* He smelled like Limberger (Seillib)
* With an odd number of people in the group, they would be unable to sign up for the square dancing competition. (Anamírë)
* Well you know, anyone who man-handles Frodo and tosses him onto the floor in hotel rooms tends to arouse Sam’s suspicions… (hot water nobility)
* Yoko Ono. 'nuff said. (SunnyJim)
* He saw him eyeing his box of Thin Mints. Nobody comes between a Gamgee and his Girl Scout cookies! (PinkOliphaunts)
3. What did Barliman Butterbur forget to give Frodo?
* Frodo's book that he'd ordered - "Eluding Capture by Ringwraiths for Dummies" (Galadlinderiel) ROFLMAO!!!!
* A bottle of strawberry bubblebath. (WhiteAslan)
* The key to the little hobbit’s room (Joelle, WhiteLadyEowyn )
* The Middle Earth Express card - don't leave the Inn without it! (luinfalathiel)
* A copy of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy [Middle Earth?]. Don't Panic! (Carnimírië)
* a mithril thong, made by the elves you know, suprisingly comfortable during cross country hikes (Idaho)
* the right room key...boy was that embarrassing, walking in on that couple...er, trio (Ayaediran)
* Directions to the loo. (All that beer, oh my!) (Kendig)
* The other letter from Gandalf telling him to take the Eagle Airways route to Mound Doom. (DAS)
* Galadriel's phone number. (notlost)
* Accurate directions to Rivendell. (LOTR_nutcase, SunnyJim)
* The PlayElf issues he left under the bed... He only meant to borrow them... (Eärendil The Mariner)
* The very nice matrix mapping their Strengths, Weaknesses, Threats and Opportunities. (Vidstige)
* A Gideon Bible for his room (Kimi)
* An extra roll of toilet paper for the road, insect repellent, marshmallows for s'mores...and a really nasty wedgie for "breaking up my crocks!" (Eowyn of Penns Woods)
* A letter from Gandalf, a postcard from Bilbo, a package from Tom Bombadil, a telegram from the Gaffer, a summons from Lobelia, and, worst of all, his change. (Darkstone)
* Barli forgot to give back The Hobbit's Field Guide to Mushrooms he had borrowed. This would become important later (glorfin2)
* His free ticket to the first annual Prancing Pony Ale and Cheese Festival. (Seillib)
* the fact that the balrog was afraid of the word "it" (Varda's Songbird)
* His hayfever medicine - which is why his eyes are always watering (ShortyElf)
* “Nazgul repellent. One small squirt is enough to repel the nose of the mightiest Ringwraith!” (hot water nobility)
4. All that is _____ does not ________.
Not all those who ________ are _________.
* All that is called Strider does not smell foul. Not all those who roam the wild are without deodorant, travel soap and a gratuitous bathing scene. (Sowen) ROFLMAO!!
* All that is blobby does not jiggle. Not all those who shake salt are Salt Shakers... (Estella Brandybuck)
* All that is Tasty does not fatten. Not all those who diet are thin. (luinfalathiel)
* All that is Ford does not function. Not all those who drive Fords are doomed. (The Trees of Yavanna) (car problems? Me too.)
* All that is filmed does not exist. Not all those who watch are fans. (Ciars)
* All that is foul does not remain. Not all those who geek out are sane. (Carnimírië)
* All that are EIA Quiz answers are not funny. Not all those who post answers are witty. (Marigold Gamgee)
* All that is gold does not fizz. Not all those who drink it are getting beer. (Kendig)
* All that is posted does not evoke a drinking game . Not all those who drink are are miserly and stingy with their alcohol. (ringers rock!)
* All that is palatable to a Hobbit does not necessarily entitle him to stuff himself beyond reason. Not all those who must enter through the back door are destined to pick up after sodding drunk Wizards. (Psyphon)
* All that is right does not make sense. Not all those who act are good at it. (Shadowen)
* Not all that seems foul is evil, except for Gollum who's a weasel. (DAS)
* that is spicy does not give you gas. Not all those who stumble are drunk. (WhiteLadyEowyn)
* All that is in TTT does not suffice. Not all those who buy the EE are geeks. (Eärendil The Mariner)
* All that is chocolate does not contain equal amounts of cocoa solids. Not all those who eat it are fat. (Kimi)
*
All that is Elvish does not compute.
Not all those who reek are Rangers.
The stench that is strong does not dilute.
Deep roots are not bleached without dangers.
From the pants a fire shall be started.
A Balrog from the shadows shall fly.
Renewed shall be gas that was farted.
The maskless again shall all die. (Eowyn
of Penns Woods)
* All that is fair is not Galadriel, not all those who like Liv Tyler are male! ... ooh er... (Amatire)
* All that is Oscar-worthy does not win. Not all those who vote are clinically sane. (Anamírë)
* All that is an operating system does not crash. Not all those who publish software are Microsoft. (Varda's Songbird)
* All that is harmonious does not appear on TV. Not all those who can sing are on American Idol. (SunnyJim)
* All that is college dining hall ‘food’ does not nourish. Not all those who eat it are without food poisoning. (PinkOliphaunts)
5. What did Gandalf threaten to do to Butterbur if he forgot the letter?
* Eat his liver with some fava beans and a niiiice chianti (Varda's Songbird) ROFLMAO!!! (and a little scared---Gandalf as Hector Lector?!!)
* His pointy hat trick. (WhiteAslan)
* Yell "humperdink!" at him non stop...oops wrong movie. (Joelle)
* Make him do another four weeks as a chorus girl at the Moulin Rouge. (luinfalathiel)
* The particulars remain unknown, but they apparently involved black light, twinkies, and old ABBA recordings (The Trees of Yavanna)
* To turn him into something unnatural! (Ciars, WhiteLadyEowyn, LOTR_nutcase, Galadlinderiel)
* Roast him alive and stew him in a pot; fry him, boil him, and eat him hot! (Carnimírië)
* force him to wear a hobbit sized mithril thong (ouch) (Idaho)
* Have him for dinner next Thanksgiving, oh wait...... that's Butterball - whoops. (mallorn leaf)
* Go halfsies with him on Glamdring (Need I say more?) (Kendig)
* Give his name and address to Readers Digest, Columbia House and AVON. (Psyphon)
* Call the Brute Squad. (Shadowen)
* Make him sit in the comfy chair (Nobody expects the Gandalf Inquisition!). (SarcasticElf)
* make him sit in the front row of "Silmarillion, the Musical" (Lurking Girl, RosieLass)
* That he would "get you, my pretty--and your little Nob, too!" (notlost)
* Make him assist with the pointy hat trick... The messy part. (Eärendil The Mariner)
* "I'll HUFF...and I'll PUFF... and I'll BLOW YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!!" (Eowyn of Penns Woods)
* Put the “prancing" back in "The Prancing Pony". (Darkstone)
* Turn him into a newt! (I know, probably already done, but I love that line!) (Randraug, Anamírë, SunnyJim)
* Gandalf threatened to turn him into a giant mushroom and put him in the middle of Hobbiton. Needless to say Butterbur was terrified. That meant that Nob would be left in charge. (Sowen)
* Declare all drinks on the house. (Amatire)
* Cast him as a CGI character with a really bad accent in the next Star Wars movie (ShortyElf)