Quotes Page

This is my Quotes page. This will have all the quotes that I think are cool.

Music is Come As You are by Nirvana. I hope you like it.

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To the Serious quotes

TMS= Me, Travis Scribner. JWW= Jason Warner.
These quotes are Copywrited, any unauthorized duplication of these quotes will result in a fine, jail time, annual flogging, deportation, or death at the stake. Have a nice day.

Quote of the week:

Chia pets make the best Voodoo dolls. -TMS

Comical Quotes

You know Jason; my Grandma makes the best Apple Pie. I would Kill for this pie. *Jason cautiously steps back* Don’t worry; you pose no immediate threat to my pie.
I was eating some home made apple pie that my grandma made for me, when Jason came over, I offered him some, and I complimented my grandma's pie with that quote.
TMS: "What's that noise?"
Brandon: "That’s Destiny telling me what a big disappointment you are."
Me and Brandon were at work, and I heard something.... so, I asked about it, and he came back with that comment.
You don't want to be in any sexual activity that involves the words; "My Legs! I Can't Feel Them!" - Eric Hoxkey
Well.... Its true.
Women used to demand Exellence! Now they just settle for you. - Eric Hoxkey.
Well.... Its true.... again.....
*Brandon gets paycheck, then flaps the check in the air*
TMS: What the hell are you doing?
Brandon: Thats my check, flying away....
Well, its true ya' know.... one second you have all of it, then the next, its all gone...
You on the other hand, dont have my mindset... You have the little angel and devil.... I just have two devils, and one hog tied beated to a bloody pulp angel.... -TMS
Mat and I were discussing Moral Delimma's, and this was my answer to the question.
,*Jason looks at crotch*
Damnit! Quit Elongating!!! -JWW

Yoink!
Travis, did you just yoink your own quarter?!
That was my quarter? -JWW and TMS
We were at Lunch, and there was change on the table which I stole... Only later found out, it was my money to begin with...
Why would you need a board game for collage?
In case you get board! Thats why they call them board games!!! -Karen & TMS.
Karen was making out a list for college, and I mentioned bringing a board game.
No, It's a airplane cockpilot! -TMS
Tounge tied......
Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life! -Unknown
Seen it in an E-mail, thought it was funny, put it here.
Your like a Visa Card, your everywhere I need to be!
AWWWWW!!!!!
No, your in my way!
awww...... -JWW & TMS
I was in Electronics, and we were picking up all our stuff to leave, when I kept getting in Jason's way, he said that.
Im not lost! Im just directionally challenged at the moment!
I was lost....
Mmm, Possible Cigarettes. -Alan Bowen
Me and him were walking to lunch when I seen a pack of cigs on the ground, I picked them up, and looked inside,but the pack was empty, and Alan said the quote.
'x,e' equals the square root of 's' but 'e' is the eoposite of 'x' and 's' is half of 'e. What are the letters 's,e,x'? - Trig. Problem.
Hey, they ran outta' letters, had to come up with that sooner or later.
You rely on Educated Guess, I rely on Dumb Luck. - TMS
The quote says it all.
TMS: I got a Guitar!
Ben: Can you play it?
TMS: Of Course I can!
Ben: Good?...
TMS: Umm, err.... No....
I had just got my guitar that day, and went to gloat about it.
It Gives me a wood to see men hit each other! - coach Bradley
When I was in Football practice one day, our coach screamed that out....
TMS: Your Dumb as a boot!
Ben:Il shove that boot up your ass!
Nice comeback, eh?
A little use, makes anything loose! - TMS
Me and Adam were opening a door, which was jammed, because the frame was to small for the new door, so out came that quote. (No, it wasnet ment in that way for you perverted people out there)
See Travis, there are two types of ghosts.... Good ghosts.... and bad ghosts.... Good ghosts... are... good.... And Bad ghosts.... are.... Bad. -JWW
Thank you for stating the supernatural obvious.
Sex with psycho chic bad,
sex with psycho chic bad. -JWW
Well, no.... Well.... Yah.... -TMS
Don't Ask....
I try to write quotes but all the thanks I get is a damn paper cut.
Jason originally made the quotes page, and then I put it on the net, before hand, I always liked to get on his quotes page (Which was almost a weekley newsletter) Hense, that quote.
JWW:If you win $10,000, I want 50 of it!
TMS: Why?
JWW: Just because!
TMS: Il give you 50 cents...
JWW: ok...
I was going to gamble for the first time, and JWW wanted some money if I won, but he isant very good at negotiation so he settled for 50 cents.
That's as stupid as making a leaf collection in the Winter!-TMS
This came on one of days in school, where its REALLY boring, and you gotta think of something to do, or you go crazy... Well, That came out in only 3rd hour...

Die Chubby Monkey! -JWW

I honestly forgot where me made up that quote... Il ask JWW in a bit..
Did I say you listen could to me? -JWW

JWW was talking to me and Charis in class, and a girl a few seats over asked what we were talking about... Hence - the quote.
Curse you darn computer and your foul little elves running about inside of you!!!" -JWW

In Computer class one day, and JWW's computer was screwing up on him.... He finally got pissed off, and blurted out that quote.
The beatings will continue until Moral increases!-Vengeance

Umm..... Dont ask me where she got that from...
Were thinking of moving the fire place other there.-Robin Scribner

My mom was moving into her new place, and it had one of those fake fireplaces that you just bolt to a wall.... Well, at the time, I didnt know that. I almost fell over dead when she said that.
That's a good idea*sarcastic tone*
Wait...That IS a good idea!!!-JWW

This came at Shool, when I was talking to Jason, and was raddling off ideas about something, and he was getting pretty pissed at the stupid ideas I was saying, so, when he said that, I had just said a good idea... and so, he changed from a sarcastic tone, to a serious tone.
Vegetarian in leather.... How Ironic. --TMS

Me and JWW argued on who said this first, but because its my web site, Im saying it was me. Hehehe... Anyways, I have no clue when or why I said this.... Flippin' aye, I have a bad memory.
She sucks! Literally! And She Sucks At Sucking! -TMS
Dont ask. Davyid and mabie 2 others know what im talking about though. Hehehehe
He had a 6 charisma in the game, and the other guy had a 6 Charisma in real life... -JWW

I was at a D&D game, with some friends, and we had two guys there who one rolled a 6 charisma (how good you look, and act), and the other, just looked like that IRL...
Never retreat, just advance in another direction- Astrakan
Don't ask me.... The quote looked cool, so I added it.
#1: Leia: (taken from a gilgoroth quote): When all the exercise you get in a day is walking from your computer to the coffee maker, you try to figure a way to move the coffee maker to sit next to your computer.

This is off the top 10 list from Rathmar's site. It just sounded funny as hell, so I added it. You Dare to defy me!? *Splat* -Vegita

Me and Jason were surfin' the net in computer class one day, and came across the DBZ web site devoted to Vegita. There was a stupid story about Vegita VS. a blade of grass... *boggle* Well, as you can tell from the quote, thats the whole story... But it was funny as hell when we said it out loud. ;)
I used to be with IT but then they changed IT now what I'm with isn't IT and now IT scares and horrifies me. --Abraham Simpon

Come one, the Simpsons is thee most funniest shows there is. This was Grandpa Simpsons thought on Music. How it changes from generation to generation.
Thats Stupidididly!-Charis

Yes, Charis..... A blonde at heart. ;) She tryed to stay "stupid" but studdered about 10 times, and out came the quote.
Whats Wrong!? That Was Insainly Funny!!!-JWW

I have no idea.....
Sometimes the insane aren't so insane; then again, anyone looks good with a gun pointed at your face. -Babblings of the insane

Note to self: Anything by the "babblings of the insane" I have no idea.... JWW made these a whyle back, and I have no idea why....
To many VegetI, To many VegetI!!-JWW
Back in Computer Science my Jnr. year (We made alot of quotes in that class) Jason (New to the net) found Vegita-insane.com... (His fav. character with Dragon Ball Z) He pretty much had an overload and started shaking.... Out came that quote in a high pitched voice.(Editor's Note: to make plural a word you can put an I on the end....)
What do you see?(in this blot test sheet)...I see a dog sniffign the ground.... DAMNIT! Took me an hour to figure that out!-TMS&JWW
Another quote from Computer Science Class... Anyways, I was in Psych. and our professor passed out an ink blot test to everyone.... Everyone stared at it for a few min. and figured it out.... Not me... I stared, and stared..... and stared.... and never could figure out what the hell it was! So, by the end of the class, (and 5 people pointing everything out to me) I figured no one in my computer class would realize it... Everyone got it in record time...
It's like playing pictionary, and trying to draw purple. -JWW

Jason was playing Pictionary in one of his english class's or something and got the word purple to draw.... He later used that as a quote.
(insert witty comment here) --Allure

It just sounded cool.
Running around in circles, screaming and yelling maniacally, waving your arms around, will sometimes get ya somewhere. Problem is it won't be far from where you started. -JWW

You got to admit, its true....
Wow, I had so many aces in my sleeve I guess I forgot about that one. -JWW

After we got done playing poker, out "slipped" that quote....
I like it, it's all flashy and zap-zap and reaor! -JWW

I think Jason said that when he first seen some pages on the net...
It's a good thing you were dead, that mighta killed ya! -JWW

Don't ask..... I have no idea....
You're ignorance is my weapon. -JWW

Once again, Don't ask..... I have no idea...
"Shouldn't they be running in fear by now?"
"Generally, that would be the idea." -JWW & Himself

And Again.... Don't Ask...
It's really to bad that your very best still isn't good enough. --Vegeta

Jason really liked this quote, so I added it... No reason...
Shweh, I missed the thorns.
Aaaahhhh! I'm gonna hit that bump!
Shweh, I missed the bump.
Aaahhhh! I'm gonna hit that treeeeeeeee! -Famous last words of a sledded

Yah..... I have no clue....
We're not afraid of what you've done, We're afraid of what you might do. --Brittney Rush

That quote was ment for Jason.... Brittney was scared of him for some reason, so she blurted that quote out to ever haunt her.
Do not fear what I will do, fear what I'm doing now. -JWW

Jason's Reply. Hehehehe.
Do not ask a man why he does the things he does, instead ask him how he does them, so that you may do what you do better. -JWW

Strange enough, yet... True...
Whad'ya mean we don't know what we're doing? We know what we're doing, we just don't know how to do it. -JWW

Yes, me and Jason.... We got an assignment in Computer Science and after 20 min. of just staring blankly at the screen, the teacher asked if we knew what we were doing... Hense: The quote.
This time you'll stay dead. -Evil Warner

Jason made a few comic books back in the day, where he split into two people (Like off Army of Darkness), That comic book rules. So I added the quote.
I really hate her. I'll think of a reason later. --Unknown

Unknown my ass, JWW said it.... Reasons why are withheld due to the fact he would kill me.
When your friends beat you up, you don't know what to expect from you enemies. -JWW

Jason was picked on alot his Freshman-Jnr. year of High school, from his friends.... He later pretty much dropped them, and went off to make his own little group.
The sky may be the limit, but that means we can go only 18 miles. --Ryan Cox

Don't Ask.... But that does remind me of another quote I need to add:
R. Cox. (Say it out loud.... again.... Get it?)(No explination needed)
It's not easy being easy. --Unknown

I was walking down the hallway to class one day, and this girl had her locker open, and this sheet of paper with that quote written in black marker hung on the inside of her locker door... Why, I will never know...*hmm*
"Warner, you just slammed yourself!"
"Yeah, but I took everyone else down with me!"
-Travis Scribner and JWW

Me, Jason, Charis, and a few other people I forget were crammed into Charis's little car, after making fun of Jason for about 30 min. he finally blurted out "Charis is more of a man than any one of us!" How Charis found that funny, I dont know... But she laughed for a long time after that.
Now that time I didn't jump in on a conversation, he jumped out. -JWW

I forget....
Life isn't fair, so why not take advantage of it? -JWW

Jason's motto on life. Which I take into account alot also.
She's a TKO. --Unknown Announcer

I think that quote came from Celebrity Deathmatch on MTV...
Games editor Jeff Hanes isn't a bloodthirsty killer. Those bleeding bodies around him died of natural causes.

No idea....
"Well Adam, I guess it's just you and me."
"Get away from me."
-JWW and Adam Cole

Like I said, Jason's old friends sucked.
Why is Travis rubbing his hands together?
*Warner nods*
That wasn't a yes or no question.
--Adam Cole and JWW

Dosent mean they can't make some funny quotes though.
When you talk to Warner, you don't ask what his problem is, you ask what his Current problem is. --Adam Cole

Back then, it was true....
Who are you mad at NOW Warner? --Brittanie Dothager

Told yah....
What kind of person quotes himself? --Adam Cole

Jason always quoted himself. Ironicly, Adam quoted himself after he said that. An Oxymoron?
If you won't condemn her, then we'll do it for you. That's what friends are for! --Adam Cole to JWW

In a sic, demented form of way, yes....
I'm torn between choosing amongst three women, each of which I have no chance with whatsoever. -JWW Here's my advice: Choose the one that hates you the least. -JWW

Jason = women problems.... Nuff said...
The longer I take to get where I'm going, the better the chance I won't get there. -JWW

Good, or bad, you decide. (And I have no idea where the quote came from)
I'm not running from my problem. Of course, I'm in no hurry to get there either. -JWW

I like that quote personally. I have no idea where it came from though....
See you in the hall, nod. See you in the hall, nod. See you in the hall, walk and talk about something stupid. But Ben doesn't talk to anyone. He's on a mission to get to class. Dut dut dut dut dut dut... --Alan Bowen

One day at lunch we were talking about stupid stuff and Alan mentioned something about talking to people in the hall, and how Ben never talks to anyone whyle going between class's. So here's the quote.
I hope for little and expect even less. -JWW

Good motto, you decide...
I'm so depressing, I depress myself. -JWW

Jason on a bad day....
You can tell a man by the size of his thought bubble. -JWW

No Idea, but its funny as hell.
You go through a door, and BAM! you're a woman. -JWW

Me and Jason were talking about dreams one day, and how he had a dream there was a party in his room, so when he walked outside, he was a woman.... (Don't ask for details)
Why do lifeguards have to know how to treat burns? If someone is on fire, just chuck em' in the pool. -JWW

I was talking to Jason after I got my Lifeguard training, and he asked what all I learned, so I rattled all that I learned, and when it came to burn treatment, out came that quote.
You didn't lie, you just didn't tell the truth. -JWW to TMS

I seem to do that alot....
Run-Away! Come back with a baseball bat. Dunk. --TMS, battle strategy for JWW

Jason and I were talking about fights and stuff one day, and how my battle plan would work for him. So theres the quote. (And the "Dunk" is the sound I made when I pretended to hit em' over the head with a bat)(I know, Don't Ask)
"uh, he DOES know he will be shot down, swiftly"
"Uh..... He doesn't plan to get in the air." --Alan Bowen & Travis Scribner

Alan thought Jason was going to ask this girl out, and knew she would deny him. But I knew Jason wasent going to ask her out, so theres the quote.
"It's a bony skeleton."
"No, it's a non-bony skeleton!" --Mrs. E and TMS

In Biology one day me and jason were goofing off like usuall, and when Mrs. E was answering a question to some guy I blurted that out....

Somewhat Serious Quotes

Im not going to add reasons on why the quotes were said, mainly because I don't know why 90% of them were said. Sorry.

"Flectere si nequeo superos, Acheronta movebo" (If I cannot Bend Heaven, I shall Move Hell) - Unknown
Something isn't right, but I don't know what's wrong.-TMS

We must dare to think unthinkable thoughts. We must learn to explore all the options and possibilities that confront us in a complex and rapidly changing world. We must learn to welcome and not to fear the voices of dissent. We must dare to think about unthinkable things because when things become unthinkable, thinking stops and action becomes mindless. J. William Fulbright

I think alot when Im alone, that's probley why people say I think too much. -TMS

Here is the secret to dealing with all people in the world. This will work no matter who the person is, no matter their disposition. The big secret is: Attention. Everyone in the world craves attention. Trust me. Take an honest interest in them and they will love you forever. -JWW

Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative. Oscar Wilde

I would like to take you seriously but to do so would affront your intelligence. William F. Buckley, Jr.

The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one. E. Hubbard

Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation for 'tis better to be alone than in bad company. -George Washington

Be nice to people on your way up because you'll need them on your way down. -Wilson Mizner

My feelings are strong, so I follow them. -TMS

No gain is not followed by loss; No love is not followed by sorrow. --Loneliness

It's ironic; the way you deal with loneliness is the way you deal with everyone else in your life. You get so used to shutting it out that you shut out everyone you want to get close to you. The very defenses built to hold loneliness at bay will keep the love you need to defeat it at bay. --Madness

Madness marches on when bravery comes to a halt. -Insanity

To much pride will make you proud of the wrong thing. -JWW

Who is more foolish the fool or the fool who follows him? --Obi Wan Kenobi

Anything that can go wrong, will. --Murphy's law

What do you do when all your enemies are friends? --Foo Fighters.

What do you do when all your friends are enemies? -JWW

True stupidity, comes from the smartest among us. True intelligence, is never recognized. True smartness, is locked up. True ideas, are repressed. True insanity, walks the streets amongst us. -Stuff

If the unknown is bliss, then is stupidity heaven? --Adam Cole

There's only one guarantee in life; you live until you die. -JWW

Kill one, and you're a murderer. Kill a million, you're a conqueror. Kill them all, and you're a god. --Megadeth

Today a chapter of my life closed, but I wasn't done reading it yet. -JWW

The best leaders are those that don't plan to be leader. -Unknown

Anyone who stops imagining, stops living. -JWW

After I'm dead, I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one. --Unknown

What you feel is what you are. And what you are is beautiful. --Goo goo dolls

I still feel that ignorance is my best defense. --Matchbox 20

Have you ever buried your face in your hands because no one around you understands or has the slightest idea of what it is that makes you be? --The Offspring

I'm sick of not living to stay alive. --The Offspring

Three strikes you out, but that doesn't mean the game is over. --TMS

A person's battle fought alone is a battle already lost. --TMS

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