†Ethan's House†
Our Angel.....
Keith A. Wilson
Feburary 22, 1978 to May 19,1998
Keith also has 2 siblings, Jeff(29), and Chad(26). He was the youngest of three boys.
In his 20 yrs. with us our lives were filled completely. He started bowling at age 6, and kept bowling for the next 12 years. I think we missed every Sat morn cartoon there was forever.
He also liked to hunt, especially archery. His dad, brother and he were kindred spirits in the woods, also liked to fish.
Keith was a homebody. Was just as happy sitting around singing "moldy oldies" with us, just as much as he loved the "grunge" music. Especially Nirvana, his fav group.
He graduated in '96 and was going to attend ITT and go for a Bachelors Degree in CAD (computer aided drafting), or Robotics. They both fascinated him tremendously. He took computers and computer design clear through HS as an elective. He was the "puter" buff in our house. But unfortunately that was not to be.
He was dx. Sept. 30,1997 with AML (acute myelogenous leukemia) and died 8 months later. He had never been sick a day in his life before this and had no signs, symptoms except for a cold the week before. To this day I just don't understand how that can be.
His sparkling blue eyes, quick smile, and sense of humor is missed by everyone. Keith had an endearing personality, and was almost generous to a fault.
He had 4 main ladies in his life. 1. His 67 VW bug, Kristy that he and his dad restored for his graduation, which he dearly loved, 2. his girlfriend Rody- who was with him the whole time he was trying to battle the leukemia. She was wonderful, she kept his spirits high. We have maintained an open friendly relationship with her and only want the best for her in the future. 3. His cat Gidget, who continues to watch for him to this day, and of course me, his Mom, his biggest fan.
Our lives totally fragmented after Keith died. We then realized that he was the nucleus of our family. My life has become vacant. When Keith died it took my heart, my optimistic outlook on life, my belief that if you try hard enough you can conquer, my naivete on the disease, my sureness as a nurse, my worth as a mother, my faith in God, and my will to live. Even though we talk, laugh, listen to music, whatever, there still isn't that same warmth and happiness in our house as there used to be. My husband and son (Chad still lives at home), go to work everyday and go about pretty much the same way. I have became withdrawn and isolated myself from everyone and everything. But I'm learning how to get among people again. We all have became more compassionate to others and are more patient.
We have learned exactly what "good" friends and family mean, since we has lost so many of them. We still have family members that have not even acknowledged Keith's death. I guess the old saying "out of site, out of mind" applies here. But, I'm honored to say that I have made some wonderful new friends, some of them right here at EH.
Thank you Allie and all. I realize so many people are ill at ease with us and they just don't know understand and I pray they never have to, because to understand would mean to go through our process also.
To be honest last years holidays were a complete blur to me. I do know that we put a Christmas tree up on Keith's grave. All decorated, lights, etc.. For New Years, his dad went up and had a shot of Jim Beam with him, and on his 21st birthday, his girlfriend and I took balloons with notes inside and released them. We didn't do anything special cuz we just couldn't handle it. I have a few ideas for this year, but to carry them out we'll have to see.
My advice to other bereaved parents is Don't hurry your grief. Be gentle and as understanding as you can with each other (if you're a couple), give them their space if you need too.
My husband and I have became almost strangers after 28 yrs of marriage, and we are trying quite hard to work things out with each other. It's an extremely difficult process. Everyone grieves a different way. I have learned men grieve differently then women. Listen to each other and be as sensitive as possible. Remember they are hurting and grieving also. Grief is a full time job, I believe. It takes so much out of you both physically and mentally. Be gentle to yourself too. You deserve and need it.
In Memory of Keith and
the Max foundation wall
Copyright 1997-2000 Ethans House,
Inc.
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