If you kiss her, you are not a gentleman 如果你親她，那你就沒有紳士風度
If you don't, you are not a man 可是如果你不親她，那你就不算男子漢！
If you praise her, she thinks you are lying 如果你讚美她，她會認為你只是在奉承她
If you don't, you are good for nothing 但要是你不讚美她，那你就一無是處了！
If you agree to all her likes, she is abusing 如果你對她的話完全同意，那她就會跩的像二五八萬
If you don't, you are not understanding 要是你不同意，那就表示你根本不了解
If you make romance, you are an 'experienced man' 假如你把氣氛控制的很浪漫，你就一定是情場老手
If you don't, you are half a man 如果不是，那你根本還不夠成熟
If you visit her too often, she thinks it is boring 如果你太常去找她，她會覺得煩膩
If you don't, she accuses you of double crossing 但是如果你不去找她，她會責備你欺騙她的感情
If you are well dressed, she says 你要是穿的帥一點，她會說你是花花公子
If you don't, you are a dull boy 穿的破爛點，那你又是笨頭笨腦的傢伙
If you are jealous, she says it's bad 如果你吃醋，她會說這樣是不對的
If you don't , she thinks you do not love her 可是如果你完全不吃醋，她又會認為你根本不愛她
If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her 你如你試圖對她調情，她會認為你不尊重她
If you don't, she thinks you do not like her 但要是你一直規規矩矩的，她又會覺得你不喜歡她
If you are a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait 你若是遲到一分鐘，她會抱怨等的多累多苦
If she is late, she says that's a girl's way 要是她自己遲到了，她會說女孩子約會遲到是理所當然的
If you visit another, she accuses you of being a hee l如果你去找你的朋友，她會說你像跟屁蟲
If she is visited by another, 'oh it's natural, we are girls' 如果是她，她會說"喔，這很自然啊，女孩子都是這樣"
If you kiss her once in a while, she professes you are cold 如果你飛快的吻她一下，她會到處說你這人很冷漠
If you kiss her too many, she yells that you are taking advantage 如果你吻太多了，她會大叫說你吃她豆腐
If you fail to help her in crossing the street, you lack ethics 如果你過馬路的時候沒有照顧她，那你這人缺乏道德
If you do, she thinks it's just one of the man's tactics 要是你小心照顧她過馬路，她又會說這是男人的花招
If you stare at other, she accuses you of flirting 你若是凝視某個女人，她會指責你是在調情
If she is stared by others, she says that they are just admiring 如果是其他男人瞪著她看，她會說他們只是欣賞而已
If you talk, she wants you to listen 如果你跟她說話，她希望你只要聽就好
If you listen, she wants you to talk 如果你只傾聽，她又要你跟她說話
Oh God! you created those creature called "WOMAN' 上天啊，你創造了這些叫做女人的生物
So simple, yet so complex 既簡單又複雜 So weak, yet so powerful 如此柔弱，卻又如此強悍
So confusing, yet so desirable 讓人又惱又愛 "O LORD, tell me what to do. AMEN" 神啊，請告訴我該怎麼做。阿門！
>Hubby: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
>Wife : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
>Hubby: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
>Wife : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one?">Girl: When we got married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.
>Boy : It's very kind of you, darling. But I don't have any worries or troubles.
>Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.>Son: Mum, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
>Mum: Well, you have done the right thing.
>Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.>Wife to husband: "What's your excuse for coming home at this time of the night?"
>Husband to wife: "Golfing with friends, my dear."
>Wife to husband: "What?! At 2 a.m.?!"
>Husband to wife: "Yes. We used night clubs.">A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"
>"Honey," the woman replied sweetly,"I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE.">"How was your blind date?" a college student asked her room-mate.
>"Terrible!" the room-mate answered. :He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce."
>"Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that?"
>"He was the original owner.">
The next day, the teacher went into the classroom and noticed, in larger letters this time, the word "penis" scrolled on the blackboard. Again, she looked around the classroom in vain for the culprit, but found none. And so, the teacher erased the blackboard and proceeded with the day's lesson.
Every morning, for about a week, the teacher went into the classroom and found the same word written on the blackboard, each day, scrolled larger than the previous day.
Finally, one day, the teacher walked into the classroom expecting to be greeted by the same word on the board. Instead, she found scrolled on the blackboard: "The more you rub it, the bigger it gets!"
> > 1) Which place do you want to have a travel most?
> A. Beijing....................................go to q.2
> B. Tokyo.....................................go to q.3
> C. Paris........................................go to q.4
> > 2) Have you ever cried when u see a touching movie?
> A. Yes......................................go to q.4
> B. No........................................go to q.3
> > 3) If your boyfriend or girlfriend still has not come yet after an hour when you date with him/her, what will you do ?
> A. wait for another 30 mins................go to q.4
> B. leave immediately..........................go to q.5
> C. wait until he/she comes..................go to q.6
> > 4) Do u like to go to see a movie alone?
> A.Yes.......................................go to q.5
> B. No........................................go to q.6
> > 5) When he/she asks for a kiss in your first date, what will you do?
> A. Refuse...................................go to q.6
> B. light kiss on his/her forehand...........go to q.7
> C. Agree and kiss him/her...................go to q.8
> > 6) Are you a humorous person?
> A. I think i am.............................go to q.7
> B. I think i am not.........................go to q.8
> > 7) Do you think you are a capable leader?
> A. Yes......................................go to q.9
> B. No........................................go to q.10
> > 8) Which gender will you choose to be born if you are given a chance?
> A. Male.....................................go to q.9
> B. Female...................................go to q.10
> C. I don't mind.............................Type D
> > 9) Have you ever got more than one boyfriends or girlfriends at a time?
> A. Yes......................................Type B
> B. No.......................................Type A
> > 10) Do you think you are intelligent?
> A. Yes......................................Type B
> B. No........................................Type C> > Let's see what results you have got!!!
> > Type A :> > Congratulations! You can extremely attract the opposite sex! You possess a charming beauty in the eyes of them. You not only have a pretty figure, but also have a humorous and gentle personality. You should be a literate person and know how to get along with people and can allocate your time well, thus you are always popular among the opposite sex.> > Type B :> > Quite good! You can easily attract the opposite sex, but you are not easily fell into the loving trap. Your humor makes them to want to get along with you. He/She will be happy being with you!
> > Type C :> > Not bad! You cannot attract the opposite sex very well, but you still have something good which make them like to get along with you. You should be an honest person and have a unique view in seeing things. You are quite friendly in the eyes of your friends.
> > Type D :> > Doh! You do not attract the opposite sex. You do not have much knowledge, and not much intrinsic humane values. You are too rude to the opposite sex. Thus you are not very popular among them.
