ann kim is my dear sister from wellesley, a gifted
writer (as you will see), and a talented dancer ( all you ncpcers... when you see ann, ask her to dance for you =) and tell her that i miss her dearly).
The louder you shout in my ear You're trying to ignore me I know
The deafer I will become
You're pretending not to listen
Until your words have no meaning to me
But I 'm creeping in anyway slowly
Until I have no interest in what you have to say
Sinking in until you cannot shake me
And I pay no attention to the sound of your voice
Until my voice becomes your conscience
And because our communication will be dead
And I get closer and closer to you
I will fall further and further away from you
Until I win you over completely
Until you lose me altogher
Ann Kim
I looked out into the remote vastness, where the sea and the sky seemed to merge into one. I couldn't see where one ended and the other began, but the union seemed to go on forever. I seemed and eternity away from it.. too far away to touch. But I felt it in my heart. The sight was so beautiful, but the feeling I received seemed almost too heavy to carry. It saddened me and I started to cry because there was a place that came with the scene that I experienced so rarely. I was a happiness I could never reach or comprehend to the fullest.
Sitting there staring into the sublime, I couldn't help thinking of you, and of how, like the melding of the sea and the sky, you
too have affected me so deeply, and you too are so hazy and difficult to grasp. And thinking of you, the tears seemed to flow more rapidly. I was reminded that things are not always black and white; like you, like that sea and that sky, there are
subtle shades of gray, too delicate to define. This ambiguity is
what pained me. As I return prepared to leave the scene of my bliss and my misery, I prayed that the emotion that had touched me as I had looked out into what I believe was heaven would never flee from me. And I prayed for you, and for myself, exactly what about us, I do not know. But as soon as I left, the peace I treasure left me, and I felt cold and empty inside.
And now as I lie here remembering that dreamlike vision, and again remembering you, I dream of tomorrow, when I will see you. I dream of how you will embrace me as the sea and the sky did, only longer and with more strength, so that joy will this time last forever and block out any heartache I once felt. And I dream that there will be no more shades of gray. Everything will be clear- you love me as endlessly as the sea and the sky flow together.
Ann Kim