Since so many of you were upset that my TWO MAN interview was done before you even knew who the fuck they were, and you didn't have the "insider" know how to appreciate the ideas that I dispelled that, both DAVE R. and PO BOY SWING are really sorry cunts. I thought I'd run this current interview which might be easier to swallow by Beatstreet Barry London. His questions are highlighted in  "yellow". So enjoy!!!!

TWO MAN ADVANTAGE
BY BARRY LONDON

The guys in Two Man Advantage pour their hearts into songs about the glories
of hockey, beer, and punk rock like Guinness on tap. After a recent release
show for the band's second album, "Don't Label Us," on Go-Kart, I had the
chance to speak to some of the band, namely frontman Drunk Bastard, left-wing
guitarist Captain Bannerman, drummer/goalie Amstel Fuhr, and Myk, who adds
screamed backing vocals. Look for the band on tour this summer.-Barry London

Barry London: Gimme the band history as hockey team.
Drunk Bastard: We met in the farm system working our way up looking for that
break. Amstel was the local zamboni driver at the community center rink. We
played for years in other clubs until we were all drafted to the Two Man
Organization. Skate and I have been dropping the gloves for years and years.
Teemu, Amstel and Myk were all playing with another losing team. And
Captain's been Coach's captain for 15 years now. We drafted the Rookie right
out of high school because we needed a young talented star that really skated
well to finish the team. I found him shooting rocks at cans in a rest stop in
Moosejaw.

Barry London: Why call yourself Drunk Bastard rather than Bud Tkachuk on this
outing?
Drunk Bastard: Bud Tkachuk was traded from Two Man Advantage last season
because of rumors that Keith Tkachuk was being traded to the fucking New York
Rangers. I can't be affiliated with that organization. Also, the last time we
were in Portland I was having an off night and Skate was yelling at me
because I was throwing bottles at the Rookie's head while he was driving.
Skate turned around and said, "You're a drunk bastard," and the name just
stuck. We came back from tour and they got a new jersey for me.

Barry London: Do you feel that being labeled as a "gimmick band" is a
problem? Why or why not?
Drunk Bastard: It's not a problem... it's retarded. Why are we gimmick core?
Why? Because we sing and dress like no other band? Because our passion in
life is beer and hockey? You know, these fucking so-called "punk" kids are so
quick to judge and put a label on something. Let me ask you something: If
you're some kid with a mohawk and looked like you walked off the set of
"Killer Clowns From Outer Space," people would judge and label you a freak or
a junkie. And you would hate that, right? So why the fuck are those kids so
quick to label us? The bottom line is that we play hard, and we play fast.
Our songs are catchy and we got a sense of humor. We don't have to prove
anything We're not looking to make the world a better place, we're a bunch of
old punks that never gave up on a shitty punk rock scene. So "Don't Label
Us"!
Myk: It hurts and helps. You get people to come check you out who wouldn't
normally. People who see you will talk about it to their friends and drag
them along. Two Man is pretty powerful live, and we end up with a lot of fans
of the music who normally aren't into punk, but there are people who can't
get by the appearance. They get a preconceived notion of who or what you are,
and there just isn't convincing them otherwise.
Amstel Fuhr: If we were labeled a gimmick band, the only problem that I could
ever foresee would be if it somehow barricaded people from the music, which
more than stands up on its own.

Barry London: How's you get signed to Go Kart? How do you feel about the
label thus far?
Captain Bannerman: Rich Black, who publishes "Under the Volcano" fanzine,
basically bribed them, I think. Greg Ross caught our show at Nightingales in
March of last year with Phil A. Sheo with the Goods, Plan A Project, and Down
By Law, and just knew he had to snatch us up before Dreamworks or Geffen. The
label has been great so far. Greg is a complete wise-ass, which makes him a
perfect tag-team partner...not to mention he's a Jew -- Jew Power forever!
Dean [Rispler] works like nuts for us, and did an unbelievable job producing
our chaotic asses. Ask me this same question in a year.
Myk: I think Go-Kart is an excellent punk label. They only sign bands they
believe in, and that makes me feel good because we got signed. As for the
label becoming aware of us, I think it was pure harassment from people who
had seen us early on. We played with another Go-Kart band, Plan A Project,
and got a tremendous response from the crowd. The Go-Kart crew was there and
witnessed it first hand. I think they wanted to be part of the force that is
Two Man Advantage.
Amstel Fuhr: The guys at Go-Kart are definitely on the Two Man team.

Barry London: If you had to compare 2MA to another band, who would it be?
Drunk Bastard: Minor Threat. I'm serious. As much as Ian meant every word he
screamed into the mic, so do I, as well. There's a common passion between the
two bands.
Myk: Bon Jovi. People only come to see our sexy frontman anyway.
Captain Bannerman: Every band that has ever existed or ever will exist has
its own personality and uniqueness. I have a hard time comparing a band I'm
in to other bands which already exist. Not to say we're rocket science --
we're not....we're not blazing brand new trails of musical sound...but we
definitely have something to offer that no other band does. But -- if I
absolutely had to -- I guess I'd compare us to Ambrosia or Eric Bell-era Thin
Lizzy. And, I'd compare us by saying there was no comparison.

Barry London: In addition to those playing instruments, Coach, Myk and the
Rookie are also very much part of the band. How'd they get involved, how do
you perceive their roles?
Myk: I got involved because I was in a band with Amstel and Teemu prior to
Two Man. Drunk Bastard and Plain Old Skate would come down after our practice
and they started writing songs together. I used to lend the Bastard my
microphone, and I would hang out and watch them practice. I helped the
Bastard with putting some of the vocals into the songs, which eventually
became my vocals. They started writing growling vocal parts for me when I
wouldn't leave them alone.
Amstel Fuhr: Coach, Myk and the Rook are important to the Two Man. Even
though only four d his way in. He came to our show and said, "You guys need a
coach. You're unorganized." I was like, "OK," and he just never went away.
Then he got his hands on a mic and it's been down hill from there. Myk was in
Pacifier, a local band that we stole two other members from. We felt bad for
him, so we let him tag a long. He does whatever he wants. He has great metal
screams, and he's the only one with long hair that looks like a mullet. The
Rookie is actually the only non member that was actually asked to join the
band. We were in Moose Jaw Canada and we picked him up at a rest stop. He
ended up being out roadie / driver / crowd pleaser. He gives good massages as
well.

Barry London: What do you like most about touring?
Drunk Bastard: Waitresses. I love the greasy spoon waitresses you get in the
midwest. We like giving them rock n' roll names, and then we take a band
photo with our waitress. I've got a book of 400 different waitress that I've
met on tour.
Amstel Fuhr: The chicks. Girls, send in your photos to Amstel Fuhr, c/o this
zine!
Myk: Hanging with the boys and seeing the reaction on the faces of kids in
every new city.
Captain Bannerman: Everything. I like the long drives, I like the shows, I
like seeing new places, and being a part --albeit a very temporary part-- of
different punk scenes across the country. You meet kids who are so different
because of the fact that they grew up in an area of the country, and hence
from a different culture, that I have not been brought up in -- but yet,
there's always that punk rock bond which makes you connect instantly. It's a
wonderful thing. Bringing the rock to the people...you gotta love it.

Barry London: How did the documentary come up? What do you hope it
accomplishes?
Captain Bannerman: The director, Marc Foster, has been a friend of the band
from the beginning and he's been a friend of Skate's LONG before this band
formed. In addition to the film, he has done the vast majority of the artwork
and layout on both of our CDs. The documentary is HIS project, and we just
happen to be the focus of it. He's been working on it since late 1999, and I
think it's not up to us about what we want it to accomplish. That's a
question that is better directed towards Mark himself. The film was NOT made
as a vehicle to promote Two Man Advantage -- in the way a music video would
be made, for example -- but rather as a vehicle for Mark's directorial
talent. I hope he accomplishes everything he wants to with it -- and if, in
the process, it happens to make people more aware of the band -- then that's
an added bonus.
Drunk Bastard: This amazing director named Mark Foster had some time between
jobs and he decided he wanted to come on tour with us to film a documentary.
He followed us around for two years. I'd be taking a dump, and there he was
with that fucking camera. Anyway, he's worked really hard on it. I just saw
the thing, and man, it's good. It would be brilliant if the movie was about a
good band!

Barry London: Are you a "Long Island" band? Why or why not? What does that
mean?
Myk: That's where we got our start, and that's where most of us live, so I
guess we are, but it doesn't seem to be the hinderence it's been for other
Long Island bands.
Drunk Bastard: Good question.. As much as I hate to admit it, we are. We all
lived on Long Island at one time. We all don't live there anymore but our
practice space is there and our P.O. box is there as well. What does it mean?
It means we're very lucky to actually be in a band that leaves the sand bar.
Long Island is only know for the Islanders four cup wins. That was like 20
years ago. Now we're going to put that sand bar back on the map and buy
mansions right next to Howard Stern and Billy Joel.

Barry London: Do you feel that your constant celebration of alcohol abuse may
negatively influence minors?
Myk: No. First off, I wouldn't call it a celebration of "abuse." We don't
sing about getting drunk, falling down and puking...THAT'S abuse! We sing
about having a good time. It's a very light-hearted look at an accepted
social practice. Most of the songs, like "I Want A Beer," or singing praise
to the guy who sells beer at a sports event, are from a very personal
perspective. It's an individual statement. I think beer commercials are far
more damaging than what we do. If you tell a kid not to do something it's far
more compelling than singing about a guy who drives a zamboni and drinks
beer. Your average Coors commercial says, "Don't drink till you're 21, it's
the law." Kids are gonna do the opposite of what they're told to do. Drinking
Coors, now THAT'S alcohol abuse! It's utter garbage!
Amstel Fuhr: Do we constantly celebrate alcohol abuse? maybe we constantly
celebrate alcohol. but those are two different things. I don't think that
anyone that listens to the Two Man is out there trying to emulate us, but if
they are, I trust that they're smart enough to know their limitations. For
chrissakes, the song is called "Do What You Want," which basically means that
"If I don't feel like drinking a fifth of whiskey tonight, I can still hang
with the Two Man and they're cool with it."

Barry London: This record is a lot harder and faster the last. Why?
Drunk Bastard: It's a lot faster and closer to what we're listening to these
days. Why? Why not? We're growing as a band, and as musicians. Also, we were
a little sick of being labeled, so we stepped it up a notch.
Captain Bannerman: There are several reasons for this. First, on a sonic
level, the record was recorded at a different studio, with a different
engineer, and a different producer. Dave Smalley did a great job of
production on the first record, as a matter of fact, I believe he was much
more demanding on us as musicians than Dean was. I believe there are actually
more playing mistakes (I don't expect anyone who's not in the band to pick
them out, of course) on this new record than the first one. But, Dean's
production experience, coupled with the fact that we recorded onto actual
tape (i.e. analog, rather than digital -- which is how "Drafted" was
recorded) led to a sound that was FAR superior than the first record. It
rawer, louder, much more in-your-face and upfront than the first record.
Another reason is that the musicianship got better (I know this seems to
contradict what I just said about mistakes on the record -- but we'll just
have to live with that contradiction). Drunk Bastard's vocals are much
improved, we made much greater use of the background vocal talents of the
Coach, and, for me personally -- I had been playing guitar less than a year
when we recorded "Drafted". A couple of extra years of playing under my belt
naturally made me a better and more confident guitarist. Finally, the
songwriting has improved. Again, a couple of extra years of playing and
writing songs together has developed the chemistry. All of us make
contributions to every song we have, but usually, one person does have the
outline or skeleton of the song, and then we all work on it to make it
complete. Whereas all but about two or three songs on "Drafted" came from
ideas Skate had, the songwriting on "Don't Label Us" is more spread out among
us. Different songwriters leads to more diversity in the songwriting, and I
think that has been a great strength.

Barry London: If the band has a message, what is it?
Drunk Bastard: Play hockey, drink beer.
Myk: We are a family, we all believe in what we do, and have a great time
doing it together.
Captain Bannerman: Yes, the band does have a very important message. It's
that punk rock can be a vehicle for going nuts and having a great time. Punk
rock is a great vehicle for lots of things: for political commentary, for
activism, for personal feelings to be expressed.....but why can't it also
make you go off and thrash around, too? That's what we're here for. It's a
party, and we hope to bring the party to every show we play. There's a time
to be serious and there's a time to go ballistic. We're your soundtrack for
the latter.