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| Yo Yo Yo by: BROWNIE 4/17/00 2:19 am Hey all, Don't call it a comeback, I been here for years. That's just a little L.L. Cool J. for ya. Anyway, so I went to Ground Zero for the first time this week and now I know why we hang out with Cupid. Kelly, this is for you...Who would you rather nail, Brownie or your brother. So we found out tonight that Frow has the hots for Alicia. And so does Charlie, Rob, Matt, and myself. Don't worry Kelly, I'll be plenty ready for you when you come home. Now let's get down to business folks.... Cupid: I'll be your friend if you let me play counterstrike for free. Rob: She's a cunt and I've never even met her. But seriously why put up with it? Frow: You better be sleeping in your own room. Alicia: Do you scratch? Lisa: Boobs are great, please show them off for me more. Aaron: Just remember that all your dead relatives see you doing that. Hyperion: I get Kelly the first through the 200th time. So back off Lance. Kelly: I'll take 201 as well if you don't mind. How's doggystyle for you? Pfeilio: Don't kick Charlie's ass, what fun would making fun of Roberta be if he wasn't around. Story time, can you feel the excitement? Priests, I just don't get it. Let me get this straight...the bad parts: no sex, shitty pay, no sex, be good, no sex, read Bible, no sex, listening to people's sins without being able to laugh at them, no sex, being nice to nuns, no sex, Altar boys don't count, no sex. Good parts: might get to Heaven if you don't end up molesting children and animals due to the no sex rule. I would rather be a mechanic. How many churches can you open up right next to a strip-joint? Not many my friends. But it seems that some folks would actually choose to be priests. These people are dumb. How often do you see a priest at a bowling alley? Rarely, and that sucks. How about at a pool hall? I've never seen one and I've been going to pool halls since I was 4 years old. And do you realize how awkard it would be to hang around a priest? That's right, very. Try to imagine stoopers, a priest hanging out with us on a regular night. I don't think the priest would approve of our behavior and then we have to go to hell. Here's one example of why it wouldn't work out.... Frow: "So Brownie, where the fu....what did you do last night?" Me: "Well, I was nailing this bit...these two boards together so I could make a cross as a sign that I love Jesus." See, not normal. I want to tell how I was hammering this girl and I end up talking about Jesus. That's just not fucking right. I don't like it. Example 2: Rob: "So Brownie, who would you rather do, Kelly or a girl who may go into a seizure during sex?" Me: "Well Rob, while I would love to be fucking a girl when she starts shaking and twitching and tightening up because it would be awesome and make me seem like even more of a stud because I could in theory fuck her until she dies. I would have to go with Kelly on this one because she probably does all that, minus the dying, plus screams and scratches and moans. So, yes, I would rather nail Kelly to the wall because she's a sure thing." Priest: "You're both going to hell." SEE, THAT'S NOT FUN AT ALL. Because knowing me and my smartass remarks. I'd probably say something like, "Well Priest Guy, go fuck yourself. I hate you. I'm going to go fuck your high school sweetheart just because you can't because you chose to become a GODDAMN priest. Have a good time in Heaven because I'm going to have a fucking great time on Earth." And Rob would probably say something about screwing a nun or sucking the priest's dick or something when he should really just say "Goddammit." So that's about it for tonight gang. I gotta go so I can write a COBOL program in the morning. PEACE I'M OUTTA HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Brownie |
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