Ah Florida! A beautiful state I think to myself as I drive down the road with the sun and wind on my skin and my blonde hair blowing wildly in the wind. I have always wanted to see Florida. Earlier I had been to Disney World and had a blast. Now here it is 3 hours later and I am driving on a lonely road, listening to "All I Have to Give". As the sun begins to sink in the western sky, I pull over to take a couple snapshots and lean against my car. Soon, it begins to get cold and the skies get cloudy. I can tell it is about to rain and decide to get back on the interstate. "I better leave,although I don't want to" I say aloud.
I climb in to my car and begin to start it. Instead I hear a clink. My car won't start! Just my luck! I have no cell phone, little cash, and I know nobody in the state. As I sit and wonder if my luck can get any worse, I hear it thundering and suddenly the rain pours down. "Maybe somebody will be along soon," I think. I sit in my car with no music and listen to the rain. Almost an hour has passed and nobody has been through. Tired from sitting, I grab a UK cap to cover my head and get out to stretch my legs in the pouring rain. After getting out, I notice a pair of headlights coming my way. "Please let them stop and help me" I say. The car stops and two figures step out of the vehicle.
"Hey bud, you alright?" a voice yells. That voice..I have heard it before. "Yeah I am okay." "You are a woman! I'm sorry the cap threw me off". As the figure who mistakes me for a man comes towards me, he stops and waits for the other figure. As they hit the light, I am shocked! The guys are AJ and Howie, my favorite two Backstreet Boys! "So what's the problem?" Howie ask. Somehow I find the ability to speak. "It just won't start." The two of them go over and pop the hood and look at the car and try to start it. As I stand there looking at them in awe, the video to "Quit playing Games" pops into my mind due to us being in the rain. I am looking more at Howie than AJ. I mean, I think AJ is awesome but I find Howie sexy beyond words. Still the video pops back into my mind and I remember that their shirts are undone in the video. Now Howie's shirt wasn't undone and I thought I could take care of that. I begin to smile a huge smile. AJ looks at me and ask "What is so funny?" I hit reality. "Uh, nothing." "Well, we can't fix this. Hope you don't mind coming back with us", Howie says."Yeah, a beautiful woman like yourself needs a warm place to stay," AJ says grinning. "Okay let me get my things." As I go to my car, Howie and AJ begin a conversation. "Man, she knows who we are. She is really staring unless we have something on our faces" AJ says. Howie says, "Well if she does, she isn't acting like our other fans but maybe she is above that." "True,"AJ replies. I come and interrupt them. "Okay I am ready"
We have been back at Howie's for about an hour. I have already hit the shower and I am wearing a huge, long football jersey that they said Nick had left behind one day while they were writing some songs. I was sitting in the living room with AJ and talking about cartoons while Howie was on the phone. As AJ and I were discussing how Yogi Bear was going to steal a picnic basket, Howie addressed me. "You know, you never told us your name." "D'oh!" I think. I stand up and extend my hand to AJ. "How rude of me. My name is Autumn Hemingway." AJ jumps up and smiles and shakes my hand. I walk over to Howie and he shakes my hand. I thought I was going to faint when his hand touched mine. I walk back over and AJ says in his Johnnie-No-Name accent "Well allow me to introduce myself. I am Alexander james McLean and over there is Howard Dwaine Dorough." Howie laughs while on the phone. "Thanks and in all honesty, I know who you two are," I say while looking down to the floor. Howie got off the phone. "Well, he starts, "they are going to get your car tomorrow. They know what is wrong with it. But they don't have the parts right now and won't have them for another 4 days." For some weird reason, I begin to cry. Never in my life have I done this because I am strong willed. "Autumn, what's wrong?" Howie ask me. "Well besides the fact I have only ten dollars on me, know nobody here, and have a huge jersey on...." I sniffed before running to the bathroom in shame. After I left, Howie and AJ looked at each other and sat down. "Poor girl. All alone with nothing going her way." AJ says. "Yeah", Howie agrees. "We got to help her." "Your right D. First thing is we have to get her to call her family and boyfriend and let them know she is okay." "Right, so what about the other things?" "Well", AJ though, "how about you and I handle this?" "Good idea. We can split the car payment." Yeah and I can get her some clothes"AJ said. "Plus," he added,"she can stay with you because your house doesn't have McDonald's bags almost everywhere." By this time, I came back as Howie was hitting AJ playfully with a pillow. "Guys, I am sorry." They both give me a look of sympathy.
"Autumn, where are you from?" AJ inquires. "Kentucky" I reply. "Well, you need to call your family and boyfriend," Howie says. "Well, my family knows I am okay cause I called them today. And I don't have a boyfriend. But I still don't know what I am going to do." I sighed and then AJ told me what he and Howie was going to do. I sat shocked.
The first day was weird because I had these great clothes from AJ. I mean, these were clothes I could never afford and I had dreamed of wearing one day. AJ was a sweetheart to me. He really talked to me and got to know me. We had one wish in common, and that was that we had a sibling of some kind since we were both only children. So, one day while Howie was gone to the grocery store, AJ and I got talking about ourselves and we discovered that we had some traits in common, namely the fact our hair had been dyed many times and we both loved hats and sunglasses. After that chat, we had bonded like a brother and sister. Nighttime was always a blast because I got to see Howie. That first night I got bored just sitting around. I liked to move when I had the chance. Howie could tell I was bored and he asked me if I had ever taken a walk on the beach. "No," I said. "You are kidding me!" he said. AJ had told me it took a while for him to break away from his shyness and I had told AJ I was the same way. "Well, you want to go walk on the beach? It will get you out of the house," he told me as his eyes twinkled. "Why not," I said. As we walked along the beach, we made small talk. We talked about the weather, the stars, how the moon controlled the tide waves....we just talked about weird things. We walked a good long while before we noticed that there was too much silence between us. Both being shy, we didn't know what to say to each other. I didn't want to ask him what it was like being in a band almost a big as the Beatles. I dared not to ask. Suddenly the silence was broke by Howie. "How did you get the name Autumn? Were you born in August?" I smiled. August was his birth month. "No. Born in February. My mom had a friend named Autumn and she named me after her." "That's cool," he said. As we walked back, he asked me many things: about my family, education, taste in music, almost everything. By the time we got back to his place, I was very tired and wanted to get some sleep. When he looked at me, he could tell I was tired. When we got back, he walked me to the door of a spare room. "Night," I said to him, eyes half open. He took my hand and softly kissed it. "Goodnight Autumn" he said smiling. As I opened the door and shut it, my desire to go to sleep was gone. I was wide awake now. As I layed in bed, I had to convince myself nothing would happen. "Autumn", I thought, "he is rich and famous and could have any girl he wants. He won't pick you. And don't even think that he is interested in you because he isn't. It wouldn't work anyway." I listened closely to my thoughts. I was right. I closed my eyes and went to sleep.
At 10am I am awakened by 3 voices arguing playfully. I get up and get dressed the best I can. There in the kitchen are all of the Backstreet Boys. "Guys, will you quiet down? You'll wake up Autumn", Howie says. AJ gives him a weird look. Just then, he looks up and sees me. "See, I told you," he says frowning. "Sorry Autumn" AJ says. "It's okay. I had to wake up sooner or later." I look at Nick and he is staring at me and smiling. "Hi" he says eyeing me. "Hi" by this time Kevin jumps in. "hear you are from Kentucky. Nice to finally meet another Kentuckian", he tells me. Brian soon jumps into the conversation Kevin and I am having. As I got talking about Kentucky-the land, the bourbon,and the wildcats- I begin to smile. "She Finally smiles!"AJ says teasing me. "Well, it is a beautiful smile," Nick says. Now I begin to blush. I turn and look at Howie and he was looking at me. When he notices I am looking at him, he smiles at me. The guys decide to get back to their songwriting as I go to the kitchen and get something to eat. I want to watch tv, but don't want to bother them so I go back to the bedroom I had slept in. A couple hours later, as I am really getting into a movie, there is a knocking on the door. "Yeah,"I yell. AJ comes in and sits on the bed to talk to me. "Autumn, can I ask you something?" I nod while still watching the movie. "If you like Howie so much why don't you just go after him?" I sit, eyes wide open. "H..How did you know I like Howie?" I stammer. "Well whenever you see him or hear his name, your face and eyes just light up. I know that when my girl Trelyn sees me she is the same way." I slowly look up. "AJ, I can't...I just can't. He might not want me. He may not find me desirable.." AJ interrupts. "Well if Nick can see all of that in you, I know Howie can. He is like you..shy. Just try it, ok?" He went out of the room, and I sat there determined to go for it. Yeah, I would make a comment to Howie. But what? I went back out and into the living room. As I was about to say something to Howie, Nick butted in. "Autumn, I was wondering, would you like to go out to dinner with me tonight?" "Oh my god!" I thought. "Is he serious?!" As I was about to answer him, AJ jumped up. "She can't! She is going out with me and Howie tonight. We promised her a meal." AJ looked at me and winked. Something was up. Howie was looking at AJ in a "what are you talking about" look. Nick said okay that was cool. What was AJ up to? Later that night, the three of us went to Tabu, and there I met Trelyn. She worked there but it was her night off. She and I hit it off fast and were talking up a storm while AJ and Howie were talking. When they got up to go to the bathroom, she began talking to me about Howie. "So, AJ tells me you like Howie?" Good ole AJ, best secret keeper in town, NOT! "Yeah, but I can't get up the nerve to really talk to him." "Well," she said thinking,"ask him to dance with you. He will probably do that." I think I will do that, on the very next song they play. Howie and AJ come back right as the music is starting....a slow song. Trelyn and AJ hit the dance floor and get so close a sheet of paper wouldn't be able to be placed between them. I begin to shake as I am about to ask Howie to dance with me. But I am thrown offguard. Howie looks at me. "Autumn, would you like to dance with me?" I smile really big and he takes my hand and leads me to the dance floor. As his body gets close to mine, I try to keep from fainting. I look over at Trelyn and I read her lips: "You'll be fine". Her and AJ kiss and I turn my head. "You are a good dancer" Howie tells me. "Thanks." I find that funny because when I was in the 6th grade I sprung my ankle dancing and have always been very self-conscience about my dancing. This is one of those times. I am hoping that no fast song will come up suddenly and make me lose my footing. I luck out. The song ends and Howie looks into my eyes and says, "Stay and dance" as "He Loves you Not" plays. For some reason I take that as a sign and say I'll only dance to that song before I go to set down. Now I am determined that I can only look and not touch. Hours later we are back at Howie's place and getting ready to part for our separate beds. I am standing by his side and he is talking. I am summoning up the nerve to kiss him on the cheek. "I am NOT backing down!" I think. "It can be a hit and run of a kiss" As he is still talking about AJ and trelyn. "Man, I still can't get over how AJ seen her and fell for her and just gave up the wild life, in a way", he says. I go to kiss his cheek,"What would you do if..." but he turns and instead of a kiss on the cheek I kiss him on the lips. Well, I freak out and run to the room and lock the door. Maybe fate is playing around with me. I just am not sure. Needless to say, I get little sleep that night.
The next day, I was nervous and jittery. I couldn't believe that I had kissed him right on the lips. You'd think I would be happy about it, but for some reason I wasn't. By the time I left my room, the place was silent. "He must still be asleep" I thought as I made my way to the kitchen to get some juice. As I stayed faced towards the fridge, my mind wondered. I noticed a slip of paper and it was addressed to me. "Autumn, gone to take care of some business. be back around 4." I looked at the clock; 11am. Great, what was I to do in the meantime? The place was already clean. I sat down and watched "The Misfits" on TCM. After it went off at 1:15,, I done some channel surfing. After hours on the couch, I had to get something to drink. I looked at the clock and it said 3:58pm. I got a glass and was preparing to pour some juice when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I jumped and heard the glass hit the ground. "Autumn?" I turned and it was only Howie. "You okay?" I let out a huge sigh. "Yeah, you scared me." "I'm sorry." I looked down and saw this huge mess. "Oh let me clean that up." Since my mind was elsewhere, I didn't notice that I was picking up broken glass freehanded. "OUCH!" I jumped up and ran to the sink and ran some water. My hand was bleeding badly. Howie came over and helped hold it under the running cold water. "I am so careless today!" I felt Howie's eyes on me and I kept my eyes down. "I must have the worst luck! I mean first my car and now..." I stopped. The phone was ringing. Howie answered it. It was Trelyn. "Hey Trelyn wants to know if you want to go hang out with her? She has nobody at the bar with her and she has to set some things up and she thought you would like to get out of here for a while." "Um, she already at the bar?" Pause.. Howie asked. "No, on her way here." "Tell her sure but I have to get dressed." Howie told her as I ran off first to the bathrom to get a band-aid for my hand and then into the spare bedroom to get changed. I was still in there when I heard someone knocking on the door. When I came out, Howie was asking Trelyn how was I suppose to get back. "Well, AJ will be coming by before that group of 15 arrives so he can bring her back here." Howie didn't say a thing. "Okay I'm ready" I said. "Autumn, I'll see you later. Have fun," Howie said. "Ready to get the party started?" Trelyn asked me. I laughed as I headed out the door. Halfway out I turn back and tell Howie I would see him later. After driving for about 20 minutes, we are at Tabu and she is making sure she has everything percise. She at this time notices my hand. I tell her what happened. She frowns. In the background "Get Another Boyfriend" is playing. We are both quiet for a few seconds. "So what happened after you two left last night? I was telling her about what I had done."You mean to tell me you ran off?" "Yep" I said. "Damn! Had that been me and AJ, I would have stayed to see what he would have said." "Yeah, but it isn't you and AJ. I think I should just give up on Howie. I mean, Nick is interested in me." "Yeah but you want Howie. I say go after him. You never know he might like you because you haven't acted like other fans." I looked down. Well we hadn't been there all that long when we hear the door open and someone is screaming. "Hey Nick!" Trelyn says as she walks toward me while behind the bar. "Hey Tre, Hi Autumn." I look up and force a grin. "Tre, could I talk to Autumn alone?" Tre backs off and goes to the end of the bar. "Autumn, if you aren't busy tonight would you like to go out? We'll go anywhere you want to go." Trelyn is at the other end of the bar, just looking at me with a 'don't do it' look on her face. I sit and wonder.....I mean I do like Howie but he isn't showing signs that he wants me. Nick, on the other hand, has been eyeing me like I was something. But I don't want Nick! "Sure," I say. Trelyn's jaw drops some. I looked at the clock and saw it was 5:35. "How about we go out now?" Nick looked shocked and stammered."I..I..sure." Nick says bye to Trelyn and goes out the door.
Trelyn is in shock. "Autumn, you mean you are going out with NICK!" "Well yeah, duh. And don't worry about AJ taking me back to Howie's. I'll have Nick take me. Just tell Howie I went out for some fun." Trelyn is still in shock as I go out and AJ walks in. I pass him and say a quick "Hi AJ, Bye AJ". He approches Trelyn. "What's up baby? Where is she off to?" Trelyn tells AJ. AJ is now the one in shock. "Does D know about this?" "No," Trelyn says,"but I have a feeling he won't be too happy about it. Do you notice how he reacts to Autumn?" AJ grins. "Yep. But you know how shy he is. I mean the girl is somewhat mysterious plus she isn't like all the other fans who want to tear our clothes off us." Trelyn laughs. "No comment on that!" The two are about to kiss when they here Howie's voice. "Hey guys. Where is Autumn?" AJ and Trelyn look at each other while Howie looks at them, waiting for someone to answer him. "Um, she left with somebody." "WHAT! You let her leave with a stranger!" Trelyn shakes her head. "No, she left with Nick." "Like that is any better," AJ jokes. "Why did she leave with Nick?" "He asked her out and she said yes. I tried to talk her out of it." Howie places his hands on top of his head. "Tre, I know you probably did." There is silence for about 20 seconds. "Hey what are you doing here anyway?" Trelyn asks. "Well, I was gonna surprise Autumn by picking her up." AJ and Trelyn look at each other in a 'yep we knew'look. "I can't believe she left with Nick of all people!" Howie said while sitting on a bar stool. "Well, you better accept it," AJ said while placing his hand on Howie's shoulder. Trelyn just stood shaking her head. "You know, I always found it funny how you and Tre just connected. I never thought that would happen to me," Howie said while loking down. "But after we walked on the beach it did. I can't explain it. There for a while I thought she didn't think anything of me until she kissed me last night." "DUDE!," AJ yelled,"She kissed you?!" Trelyn laughed. "Oh I know all about that. You know, she was going to kiss you on the cheek but you turned and she nailed you on the lips." "Well, I wish she hadn't ran off so suddenly." "D, if you liked the kiss you should have went after her and said so." "Well," Howie stated," I was going to but she took off and I didn't want to bother her and look where that has got me. She's with Nick." AJ looked at Howie."You need to get your butt in gear if you want her." "Yeah," Trelyn said. "Ohhh I have an idea! How about you have a dinner tomorrow night that is romantic. You wouldn't be alone because AJ and I could show up to ease nerves and after we leave you tell her how you feel." Howie and AJ look at Trelyn in amazement. "Tre, that is a great idea!" Howie proclaims. "I'll call you early tomorrow and let you know what is going on." "No man," AJ says, "just plan it. It is more for you and Autumn." Howie got up ready to leave and as he was almost out the door AJ screamed at him. "If I were you, I'd keep an eye on Nicky just in case." Howie smiled. "I'll keep that in mind."
11:30 pm my watch read as Nick was walking me to the door. "Autumn, thanks for going out with me. I had fun. I'm just sorry that I didn't get you back sooner." I stood there in my own little world while Nick rambled on. I kept seeing the kiss I gave Howie in my mind. Why did I even go out with Nick? I had made a mistake and I know hated myself for it. I looked up at him and he was staring at me. Uh-oh..I know that look in his eyes. I got it before I kissed Howie. Nick was moving in. Suddenly the porch light came on and Howie stood in the doorway. Saved by the light! "Hey Nick." Nick was upset big time but he played it off. "Hey Howie. Uh, um.." "I want to thank you for bringing Autumn back the way you found her." I was about to laugh for some reason. It was too funny. Nick looked at me and was about to say something. "Autumn, you look tired, "Howie said. "I am. Nick, thanks. Talk to you later." I ran in before he could say anything. It was no lie...I was tired because I had got no sleep the night before.Also, listening to boring stories gets you that way. I heard Howie tell Nick to be careful and have a goodnight. When Howie came in, he had a huge smile on his face. I plopped down onto the couch. "So, did you have fun with Nick?" I looked up at Howie. "Yeah, if you consider playing a N64 for almost 3 hours fun" I said sarcastically. I was getting tired and becoming a grouch of some sort. "There isn't a thing on." I turned the tv off. "Autumn, you going to be busy tomorrow night?" I shook my head. "Why?" "Well, I thought you, AJ, Tre and I could all get together and have dinner. That's all. You game?" "Yeah," I said while streching out on the couch. Howie walked into the kitchen and began telling me about the dinner but I didn't hear it all. By the time Howie got back to the living room, I was fast asleep.
I awoke on the couch and with a stiff neck. Over me was a cover. I smiled when I arose due to a dream I had that seemed so real. In this dream, Howie had touched my face and kissed my forehead. Ah, dreams. Something I loved, but I had one dream that wasn't coming true. I went into the spare room and changed into shorts and a tanktop. As I was deciding if my hair was going up or staying down the phone rung. I was reluctant to answer. "Hello?" "Yes I am looking for Autumn Hemingway." "Well this is she." "Well this is Dale from Golden Touch garage and I thought I would let you know your car will be ready to pick up tomorrow." I smiled and thanked Dale. I began to dance around the room, my hair down and flying around the room with my body. I caught Howie from the corner of my eye and stopped, embarassed. "WOW! Someone is in a great mood. Is it from last night?" Howie asked joking. "Howie, my car is going to be ready tomorrow! I can go home!" Howie got this look on his face. "Well, that is good then. I guess that means this dinner better be something to remember huh?" I nodded. It was almost 6pm when Howie started getting the pots and pans out and making so much noise I had to turn the tv off due to me not being able to hear it. By the time the noise had stopped, the phone was ringing. "Hello," Howie answered. "Hey AJ. What? Oh, okay. No, I understand. Tell your mom hi for me, Later." I walked into the kitchen and sat at the table. "What was that about?" Howie sat down. "Well," he started, "AJ's mom asked him and Tre to have dinner with her. He said yes but didn't realize that her dinner was gonna start at 8:oo; the same time as mine. So I told him it was cool to have dinner with his mom." "That is cool though. I can go out and grab something," I said. Howie looked at me. "No. I am giving you this dinner as planned only I am ordering takeout. That ok?" I nodded. "Well, I have to go by Tabu and go over some things. How about we start the dinner at 8, as originally planned?" I stood up. "Sounds good to me." Howie grabbed his keys and was almost out the door when he turned, winked, and said "It's a date then."
As soon as he left, I said aloud "What the Hell did he mean by that!" I felt cramped up and decided to walk on the beach to clear my head. As I walked, many thoughts popped into my head. Mainly the thoughts of Howie. I wanted Howie and the remark he made. That is when more questions popped into my head: "Am I that ugly?" "Is he playing on my emotions?" "What did he think about me and Nick?" These thoughts went on until I looked at my watch and saw it was almost 7. I had to get back and get a shower. No use of me running late. That was the boys jobs. I smiled when I thought that. Maybe Howie would be late. I stopped and decided to give up my quest. Like I would get anything accomplished with just a night left. And if he didn't want me I had Nick...."Damn I want Howie" I thought. I arrived back, apparently before Howie and took a quick shower and then went to the spare room and brushed my blonde hair out. I heard the door slam and thought I would wait a while before going out. After 5 minutes, I opened the door and went out. "At least there will not be any N64's after dinner", I thought. The place was dark, except for some candles burning and soft music was playing. I was truely amazed. "So," Howie asked,"you ready to eat?" I was so amazed beyond words that all I could do was nod my head. "Autumn, you okay?" Somehow I found my voice. "I..I..I am just so amazed that you went through so much for a dinner." "Well, I mean it was also going to be like this had AJ and Trelyn been here." We sat down at the table and I felt my hands shake. I thought to myself, "Autumn calm down." "So, is this your first time?" "Excuse me?" my eyes got wide. "First time eating Chinese?" "Yeah. Well other than a tv dinner I get that is sweet and sour chicken." Howie laughed. "Well, when you have the real thing, it is better. Here, try this." He handed me something in a box and I tried it and liked it. We sat and talked about how I was liking Florida and how I thought Trelyn was awesome. Howie said he considered her to be a sister. Then we joked some. Then we metioned Florida again. "I mean I love Florida," I said, "but I am SOOO homesick! Talking to Brian and Kevin brought it on." "So is that why you have been getting out of here so much? Or am I just that boring?" "Oh, you are not boring Howie. It's just if I sit around I think of Kentucky. Plus I hate staying in. I like to move around." About this time, "I'll Make Love to You" by BoysIIMen began to play on the CD plyer. Howie stood up."Autumn, may I have this dance?" "Like I would say no", I thought. "Sure you may." I said My hands begin to shake worse. It seemed the more I denied an attraction the worse I trembled. Howie held me close and began to sing part of the song to me. I was avoiding eye contact because I didn't want him to see how much I was enjoying this. I happened to glance up, and we locked eyes for what seemed forever. I got really lost in his beautiful brown eyes. He touched my right cheek, brushed the hair away from my face, and softly kissed my lips. This is what I had been waiting for. "You know,"Howie said,"I've been wanting to do that since the night on the beach." "Wh..wh..why didn't you?" "Well, at the time I didn't know how you felt about me. But the night you kissed me, I knew." I looked down and smiled some. "But, it really got to me when you went out with Nick," Howie said. "Well I didn't know how you felt. I mean here Nick was showing me he was interested in me. If I had known that you were interesting me I wouldn't had gone out with him. I'm sorry." Howie took me in his arms and looked into my eyes and told me it was okay. We began to kiss again, more passionately, more deeply, more tenderly. We slowly made our way into Howie's bedroom. "Autumn usted es muy bonita," Howie said. I smiled because I know what he said: Autumn, you are very beautiful. He careful laid me back on the king sized bed and we kissed more.
I awoke the following morning with the chirping of the birds. When I opened my eyes, Howie was looking at me. "Good morning beautiful," he said. "Good morning." "Well did I live up to my promise to make your evening something to remember?" he said with a grin on his face. I laughed "Oh yeah." We were about to kiss again when the phone rang. Howie reached over by his bed and answered the phone. "Hello? Yes, she is right here." He handed me the phone. "Yeah," I said. Silence. "Okay thank you." Howie loked at me. "Your car's ready isn't it?" I closed my eyes and sighed. "Yeah." I was about to cry. Earlier I was wanting to leave for home but after what happened with Howie, I wanted to stay so badly. I got up and got dressed. "Autumn.....I want you to stay here with me. I mean, you told me yourself that you have nothing back in Kentucky to enjoy. Your boss doesn't appreicate you. Your friends hardly see or talk to you. That isn't the life you want is it?" I turned around. He was right. I had only my schooling and family back home and even my family was strict to me. Howie was looking at me with puppy dog eyes. I really knew of one thing I wanted, and that was Howie. "I have to think about this, okay?" I asked. "Sure. Just take your time."
I left the house and done what I had been doing the last few days to clear my mind and that was walk on the beach. I cried so much my eyes hurt and thought so much I got a headache. My heart was saying stay but my mind was screaming home. I had always listened to my brain. That was my downfall:listening to my brain. It always led me the wrong way. I turned around and made my way back to Howie's. When I entered the house he was sitting at the kitchen table and when he saw me, he looked up. "I have made up my mind...I am going to go home." Well that wasn't what Howie wanted when I looked at his face. It was hard for me but I was really wanting to go home because Florida was too hot and I didn't want any time away from Howie while he was on the road. Howie took me in his arms and kissed me. "Autumn, I won't forget you. For once, I found a girl who didn't freak out when she saw me and she took time to get to know me, the REAL me." If he was trying to get me to cry, it was about to work. "Howie, I have to go." I grabbed my bags and jumped into a taxi I had called earlier. I hated goodbyes and was awful at them. Before I got out the door, Howie gave me an earth shatering kiss. How I got to the taxi is beyond me. And that was my farewell present of sorts.
Thirty minutes later, I am finally driving my car again and my mind is more on Howie and everything that happened in those few days. The walk on the beach, the time spent together, the kiss, and last nights events. I was torturing myseslf. "I need some music," I said aloud. I put my CD player on and "How Did I Fall in Love with You" played. I suddenly stop my car and take a deep breath and change the song over to "Shape of My Heart" and put it on repeat as I turn the car around. To hell with home.
I drove like a crazy person to get back to Howie's. About 45 minutes later I arrived at his house and tried getting in all the doors but they were locked. I drove to the nearest payphone and grabbed the phonebook and called his club. "Hello?" I knew that voice. "Tre, it's Autumn." "I thought you left?" "Well I was but I turned around." Tre laughed. "I will go on and tell you he is here. You want me to tell him you are coming back?" "No, please don't." "Okay," Tre said. "Well, as the verse goes..Gotta go!" I said. Tre laughed as I hung up the phone. I got back in my car and noticed it was getting dark and cloudy. I arrive at Tabu and step out of the car and run inside and see AJ and Tre. AJ sees me and his eyes get big. "I thought you left?!" I begin to tell him but Tre beats me to it. "Guys, can you do me a favor? Tell him he has a delievery in the front he has to get." They agree to do it. I run outside and waited when I felt the rain drop on me. I waited for about 5 minutes when I saw Howie come out. With his arrival, the rain began to pour down. I walked over to him and we looked each other in the yes.
"Baby please try to forgive me," I say grinning. Howie smiled when I said that and replied with "Stay here don't put out the glow. You changed your mind or you forgot something," he said. "The first one." He took me in his arms and we began to kiss whlie standing in the pouring rain. "I think we need to go in and dry off," I say. Howie put his arm around me. "Yeah. We have a lot of decisions we need to make for the future. Our future." I smile at those words.
OUR future. And just think what I could miss had I gone back home to Kentucky.
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