my poems


I love writing poems, however, I cannot share all of them with the world (or whoever comes to my page) because they are either too personal or too special to me. But still feel happy because the ones I put up here are personal too. So this is a big risk for me, I hope you enjoy them:)
24 march

the sky tonight
feels like it does
over Bahgdad
split open with
a rumbling thunder
shaken by flashes and expolsions

but my sky is filled
because of spring storms
and Bahgdad's sky is filled
with the sadness
of destruction and devastation
because of war

15 march

looking up at the sky
talking into the night
hours and hours spent
and millions of things
left to say

(this is my ode to Zach, written on one of the most special nights of my existance)

14 march

peering at me
behind a circular lense
I cannot see who is there

I wonder what is thought of my stature
my outlines
my expression
I wonder how I look
to invisible eyes

if I appear as me
slightly blurry slightly awry
and mostly me...thoughtful and sensitive
to the slightest
    change
in temperature

(photo project-inspired poem)

4 march

my stomach hurts
because I haven't eaten anything real
for weeks

but then again
I haven't been real for months
so why can I even notice?

24 feb

I will be perfectly okay
without you
because you forgot
who you were and became somthing else
and you forgot who I was
And all you seem to care about
is getting your way covering your ass
and making sure you're not
getting screwed
even though you have no problems screwing anyone else

and deep within
I know I am too beautiful
to be shit
and I believe someone will see it
even if you never do again

23 feb

I have everyone fooled
they mistake my signs of life
as evidence that I'm
not dead

18 feb

my life is documented
in fragments of poetry
I exist in blurry
 polaroids
my memories show up
in songs that repeated endlessly

17 feb

more empty promises
you continue to hurt me

you continue
to plague my mind
at two in the morning
conflicting emotions
of love and sorrow
make it impossible
to sleep
as my face burns
with my saltwater tears

16 feb

where am i going to put this pain?
if not numbed
if not ignored
if not forgotten?
Will it heal like
scar tissue
on my heart?

16 feb 2003

always running
to grandma's
nine miles
Italy

I comfort myself
with visions
of chosen seperateness

10 dec

I gutted my car on sunday
a skeleton of my best friend
sits in the garage
cold and empty
I cry for her
no more drives
no more music
no more thought-harboring
no more water bottles
I can't say farewell
I can only cringe and sigh
I wait for the phone to ring
and pronounce her
dead
or
alive

19 august

there she lays
wrapped in a little cocoon
her slight body
so fragile
under my embrace
she mumbles at me
to go to bed
so I stumble from the darkness
of her room
to my own

(this is my ode to Christie. Once I was up really late and I went in her room to hug her goodnight. This is the poem I wrote about her)

24 july

and there
she flies by
Fanatical Bike Woman
face twisted, concentrating
out-riding her pain
she only needs to feel her muscles
burning and the wind
on her face
and her mind goes numb
with nothingness
and she forces her pent up energy
onward
the neighbors sneak a peak
there goes
fanatical bike woman


4 july

I watched the explosions
with untrusting eyes
they looked colorful and pretty
but when I closed
my eyes
they sounded real
and scary
and I thought
really, what a strange way to celebrate


15 june

I don't think
I like people
sitting in rooms with them
trying trying trying
to make sense of it all
but I'm too exasperated
and frustrated
and long-winded
and well-behaved
et cetera, et cetera
and life keeps moving
under my feet
and I wonder if I even understand
any of it
and I keep waiting for someone
like me to meet
but I doubt they exist
like I doubt my own
and I am waiting
for it all to fall into place
waiting for such a long waste of time

if I could just figure out
how to get off the ground
and into the sky

if I could just make my fingers work magic
and my silly voice sing
my heart open to me
and have room enough to be

I throw pieces of my precious self into the ocean
hoping maybe who I want will find them
and hoping they aren't just sinking


9 april

I don't know why but I never want to
go to bed
I feel like dancing around
with my wet tangles of hair


25 feb

sleepless and sad
I lay in bed and write poems
I'm sick of my smashed glasses
sitting sideways on my face


8 jan, 2002

So
fragile rock flower girl
how are you today?

Where have you been
While I've been here wandering
aimlessly out of place through
the girls with numbers on their shirts?

It'd be nice if you'd stick around-
for me, you know?

It's easier for me to smile in the
mirror of the girls room
if I can see you behind my eyes


10 dec, 2001

I am the girl who writes on her wrist

Yes that is me

I sit for the last few seconds
so when I turn the key again it's new

I am in love with so many
and am warm inside for one

I am the girl with writing on the inside
of her left wrist


25 sept, 2001

I am a purple girl
and like grey rainy skies
I drive along in my warm red mobile
I sing
I look ahead above the black ribbon
into massive rhinosaurus gentle clouds

I wear a purple fuzzy sweater cape
over a purple shirt trimmed with darker
above grey pants

I love a grey sky (shhdon'ttell)
A brisk fall wind
...tea, hot chocolate, books, blankets...
      *memories*
the smell of halloween
I like grey

I love a purple sunset
yummy
swim in its colors
capture it in my heart

I am a grey girl
I like purple skies
but and yet
a purple girl grey skies girl

Hehe-That's me




I wrote these and since I love my poetry please don't take it without asking.
also I drew the little faerie girl and I know she's just a stick girl but I like her too so the same goes for her :)