My Time is Ending

By Lovely-chan

The tenuous light of the sunset penetrated the crystal of a train in motion toward the city of love awakening from the deepest dream the young man sitting beside it. Slowly the youth went opening his blue eyes and he raised himself of his comfortable posture to sit down straight in his chair, discovering the reddish sparkles color of heaven. “What time is it? It’s starting to dim.” The youth stretched his arms and legs accommodating his body nearer the window to enjoy the beautiful landscape of green valleys they were crossing with only the small rays illuminating them.

It was lacking much time to get to his destination, but he was impatient to get to know the famous city of Paris. The young man sighed and stood up to stretch his already numb legs by so much resting and slowly put back in place the golden locks that rebelliously were moved out of place. “I’ll go take a walk…I can’t take this confinement anymore." Covering his slender back with a long black jacket of leather, he left to take a walk to waste some time by looking at people that maybe were more fortunate than he was. 

Two children were playing clapping their hands while their mother tried to quiet them so they won’t bother the people around them giving the young man a flashback of memory in which he played the same way with his older brother. So many memories… His face turned sadder while remembering a yesterday that would never be the same again. Steven, forgive me.

With extremely slow steps he walked all the way down the train till he reached the end. The speed of it was incredible for something that seemed so old and boring for his taste, but it was an experience he didn’t wanted to miss out of life. His hairs were disturbed with the quick breeze whipping at him and he lost his gaze in the already dark horizon that for him resembled his soul.  A mixture of melancholy and emptiness was reflected in his face and he let escape a solitary tear that was dragged by the wind almost immediately after it was noticed.  "So much missed out of life..."

The train finally stopped and David breathed a new air that gave him a sparkle of hope on finding what he was looking for. The weather was a little cold for his taste, but even though he liked the city with only a quick glance given. So much life and happiness…I hope it’s contagious. A tiny smile was drawn on his lips with that though, and then proceeded his way carrying a bag on his shoulder looking for a hotel. The famous city of Paris, at last I’m here. I hope I can find what makes it so special.

 While he was lost on his thoughts he bumped into another young man making him throw to the floor the box he was holding. “Ezcusez-moi monsieur.” (Excuse me sir) He nervously helped him pick up the box and the other man stayed looking straight to his eyes.

 “American?” The young man asked politely.

 “Yes. How did you know?”

 “Not only because you don’t look French. The truth, your accent is terrible, that’s why!” He giggled while he goofed at the other man’s horrible French. 

He blushed because he knew how bad his French was, that without mentioning his terrible accent. “I’m sorry about the box, I was very distracted and…”

 “Don’t worry, it was a gift I wanted to get rid off anyway, now I don’t have to. At least I won’t have to eat my mother’s horrible tart.” The young man laughed, and since he did, David couldn’t help but to laugh as well.

 Laughing…it was so long since I last did.

 “My name is Giovanni, I’m Italian but live in Paris since I can remember. I know the city better than the palm of my hand, are you on vacation?”

 “Something like that.” 

“What do you mean? You come for vacations or for work…I see, you came for business?” 

“Well, no…I came…it doesn’t matter. Hey, do you know some nice hotel that is not very expensive? I’m not sure how long I’ll be staying, so I don’t want to waste my money.”

 “Sure! There’s a nice inn around the corner, it’s lovely and economic. I live there!” He smiled happily and guides him through the crowd to the hotel. “Who travels without reservations?” His voice sounded goofy and poor David flushed again with embarrassment.

 “I didn’t have the time, it all happen so suddenly.”

 “You are mysterious!” Giovanni laughed and keep walking quickly without noticing how hard it was for David to keep up his paste, but fortunately for David they reached the place a few moments later. Thanks to Giovanni he was able to get one of the best rooms at lower rates and he quickly help him carry his luggage up to his room. “Here it is, you’ll love the sight. You can see the entire city, and at night, the tower shines more than a bright star!” 

“You really like this place, your eyes are glittering.”

 “He, he! I’m like that, very emotional. Well, if you need anything knock on my door. My room is right next to yours.”

 “Do you get pay for this?”

 “Paid? Ha! Ha! No way! I do it because I want to. You should smile more often- it’s good for your health. If I keep smiling this much, I’ll last a 100 years!” He winked him an eye but then notice how David turned pale. “Are you ok? You better lay down, looks like the trip did no good to you.”

 “Yeah, it seems…thanks for everything Giovanni.” 

“You’re welcome, by the way…what’s your name?”

 “David.”

 “Nice to meet you David.” He shook his hand smiling and though how funny it was the fact that he didn’t asked him the name before after all they’ve talked. “If you want I’ll give you a tour around the city tonight. Ok?”

 “Sure, later.” He went inside his room and observed every detail to remember it well after a few days or maybe weeks. A full bed dressed in white sheets covered with a beautiful weave quilt of the same color with lots of fluffy pillows on top. In the commode rested a small flowerpot with some wild flowers of vivid colors and there was a small table for two near the balcony with nice potpourri smell. “This is a beautiful place…attractive and tranquil. This is what I was looking for, a place to rest.” He put the bag on his bed and walked to the door that headed for the balcony and when he opened the curtain the intensity of the light clouded his sight. After a few seconds he was able to focus his gaze in the amazing landscape that he could appreciate from there. “Wow!” Without wasting one more second he opened the doors and step in the balcony to contemplate with more detail the wonderful view of the city. “I feel alive…at least for a moment…how ironic. But is like I’m standing on top of the world. Ah!” He sighed and breathed the air caressing his pale face while smiling at the city.

 David spend long minutes puzzled, analyzing every little detail he could clearly perceive by only looking at it, and started making an imaginary list of all the places he wanted to visit. He sighed once more and walked back to the bedroom to undo his light luggage and then took the so needed nap his body was pleading for. He slept for long hours without even noticing how tired he really was.

 A soft knock on the door woke the blond man from his deep sleep making him notice how late it really was. “Damn! It’s already night!” The louder knocks made him stood up discovering an intense pain all over his body. “I wonder who is it? I’m in pain…fuck!” He opened the door disgust for the interruption, but when he looked the glittering brown eyes and the beautiful white smile waiting for him, the feeling was gone. 

“You were still sleeping?! Don’t be so lazy and let’s go! The night is waiting for us.”

 “Giovanni, I don’t think I wan to go. I’m tired.”

 “Tired? You slept all day! Come on, you are young and full of life. You don’t come to Paris to stay in bed-that’s what hospitals are for.” David’s face turned pale once again and even a small dizziness took over him making him hold on to the doorframe so he wouldn’t fall. “Woa! You really look bad! Are you sick? Is that why you want to stay?” David nodded. “If you want I can brought you some medicine for the flu- they’re very good.”  

“No it’s ok, I got something. But you are right; I didn’t come to Paris to sleep. Let me brush my hair and get my jacket.”

 “Ok, I’ll wait for you downstairs.” Giovanni left energetic, as always, to wait for the American man that got his attention for his mysterious eyes and silence. I wonder what’s his mystery? I like him; he is different. I don’t know what it is, but there’s something about him that attracts me a lot. It’s been so long since I feel this way…butterflies, ha! He took a cigarette and placed it on his lips trying to light it with his old lighter without success. “What a crap! I have to get another one.” He kept insisting to the lazy lighter and when David arrived he took the cigarette throwing it to the floor and stepping on it. Giovanni looked at him disgust with his attitude especially since they just met. “Hey, what’s the matter with you?!”

 “Those things will kill you- you better not do it!”

 “Come on, I will die out of something!”

 “If they tell you that only few moths of life remain for you, you wouldn’t say the same thing.”

 “That’s enough! Don’t exaggerate! You put me in my coffin an all! Relax.”

 “I’m not exaggerating…you never know when death will hunt you.” Giovanni looked at him surprised and guessed he over reacted so he tried to calm down the atmosphere a little. “If you want to smoke, at least don’t do it in front of me, will ya?.” 

“I don’t know what ya gonna do, ‘cause the more we have in Paris are smokers.”

 “I’ll see what I can do, but would you do me that favor?” His eyes seemed to be begging, so Giovanni couldn’t resist his pleading and accepted it. “Thanks…let’s go meet the city!”

 Giovanni took him to all the places he liked the most at the nocturnal hours, up to the Eiffel Tower, to the Arch of Triumph, and even to a boat ride along the river in which they could see many beautiful sights of the city and the Statue of Liberty adopted by the New Yorkers. “I love this city. The water, the lights, and the smell of the wind made me feel like I’m in another world further away from pain and sorrow. When I feel sad, I walk down the streets and all the wrong fades away like magic.”

 “I hope you were right…but I think I know what you mean. There’s a feeling of peace in the air, an internal emotion or illusion in the city.” He started thinking and his eyes turned sad once again for an instance touching the curiosity of the Italian young man. 

“What brings you here?”

 “Change. I wanted to change the atmosphere…I don’t know…see the world maybe. To find something that makes me feels alive.”

 “Why don’t you feel alive? Did you felt trapped?”

 “So-so. Have you ever felt the need to escape? Forget about everything that once was important but that now seemed insignificant?”

 “Not really. I’m very happy in here.”

 “Good for you…”

 “Tell me David, was it love?” 

“Love? Ha! And what the hell is that? Love is only an illusion created by man to go on through life dreaming they may found it, but in reality they never do.”

 “That’s not true.”

 “No, actually I never found real love. All the romances I had were only physical attraction…I guess I’ll die without knowing it.”

 “Don’t be pessimistic! You have your whole life before you!” David sarcastically laughed indicating he was wrong. “Come on, how old are you?”

 “Twenty three, and you?”

 “Twenty. You see, you are so young! Love is everywhere you just have to be open to it…maybe is closer than you think.” He winked and smiled sweetly to the man before him while removing a lock of golden hair covering the eyes of the handsome young man. 

David slightly blushed and totters. “No…I-I don’t think I’ll make it. That is not a goal in my life anymore…” My time is ending… David was silent for a few minutes with his gaze lost in space while Giovanni only observed him trying to understand why he was so sad and why he had no faith in love without founding an answer.  “And you…have you ever loved someone?”

 “There are tons of ways to love, but if you mean a couple, yes. But it’s been a while since I last fell in love. I will only tell you this; it’s a feeling you must experience. It’s so wonderful there is no way to explain it…you mustn’t waste the opportunity to love.” He took David’s hand and smiled lovingly. “Come, I’ll show you something. It’s a special place for me.” He pulled him and started running down the street till they reached a small hallway that divided the street and the lake, and slowly walked all the way down where there was an onyx statue in some sort of altar. “It’s a god of love. There’s a myth that maybe works out for you.”

 “What should I do?” 

“Kneel down before him and put your hands on his feet then make a wish…but don’t go asking impossible k? You’ll se, it will be granted.”  

“Did he grant you any?”

 “Of course! Why you think I brought you? Just ask, you’ll see. But you must have faith so it will work.”

 David kneel down before the god and placed his hands on the statue’s feet, just like Giovanni told him, asking for a miracle of love. While he begged for a last opportunity, a daring tear escaped his left eye falling on the god’s feet. After his pleading, he stood up giving his back to the other young man so he could washed his tearful eyes without being so obvious in front of Giovanni, but even when he tried to hide it, the Italian noticed the pain he carried.

 When he saw the tears from the beautiful blue eyes he felt an immense tenderness toward the young man, almost making him tear along with him. “What you wished for?”

 “I won’t tell you, or it won’t be granted.”

 “Ok, as you wish. Let’s get something to eat; I’m starving.”

 “Me too, I haven’t eat anything today.”

 “That’s why you get sick and look pale like the death.”

 Once again, David froze up inside with Giovanni’s comment making his pale skin turn paler. “Maybe that’s why…”

 “That’s why, what?”

 “No, nothing.” 

“You are so strange!

 “What do you mean by strange?”

 “Well, that…you are like mysterious, I don’t know. You never finish your phrases or don’t speak at all.”

 “Not everyone is so jabbering like you.” For the first time in the night David smiled, captivating the Italian’s heart even more than before with a smile that was worth a million for him. 

“I love to see you smile for a change.”

 “Well…I don’t have many reasons to smile, that’s all. But I would like to do it more often…if only I had a reason.” 

“That’s why you meet me. Nothing happens by coincidence, our encounter was premeditated from far away.”

 “Don’t go telling me you believe in those things?” He laughed mocking at the young man looking at him feeling a little foolish before the eyes of the American, and then added making fun of him. “Well, if you made me ask for a wish to a statue…”

 “Hey, stop it! I didn’t made you, you do it all by yourself.”

 “Maybe because I have nothing else to lose.”

 Giovanni was going crazy to know what was troubling David so much that made him be so pessimist about everything and had a negative comment to all, so he decide to ask directly. “You are suffering, right?” David didn’t answer, but his silence said more than a million words. “I would like to help you to…to erase your suffering.” He put his hand on David’s shoulder trying to give him a little support since the American was holding back his tears. 

“That’s impossible!”

 “Nothing is impossible, just have faith. Even the biggest pain can be cured, or maybe relieved with something else.”

 “If at least you were right…” His face reflected an intense pain that almost seemed like bitterness and his eyes where yelling for help without even opening his mouth to ask for it.

 “Don’t be so sad! You better eat, it’s delicious.” He wanted to console him but without knowing the reason for his suffering and with the fact that he just met him, he just couldn’t and just smiled at him. He had to be conformed by only trying to cheer him up with his silly jokes and anecdotes from which he was the protagonist. They stayed on that old cafeteria for long hours just chatting about whatever comes to Giovanni’s head, he did most of the talking and David happily listened to every story he made. 

After many hours, the coldness was starting to penetrate David’s slim body provoking chills all over his skin and constantly shaking. He felt his bones were frozen and also an intense pain that made him shake even more. “Can we go now? I’m freezing.”

“Sure, before you get worse. You are trembling like a little boy.”

 “Yeah…” Both walked slowly to the hotel while they continue their endless chat. David placed his hands inside the pockets of his jacket and tremble even more each second until they finally reached their destination wishing to ran to shelter his body from the coldness. “Thank you Giovanni, for everything. You were better than a tour guide. I hope to see you some other day. Well, see ya or I’ll freeze to death!”

 “You go ahead and rest, and I did it with pleasure…the tour you know. I’ll see you tomorrow around for sure. Night.” 

“See ya tomorrow!” He ran inside and took a bottle of pills that he apparently forgot in the hotel. “How could I leave those?!” He took the pill and closed the windows running to snuggle in the bed and even wore his jacket to protect himself from the weather.