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Chapter Two We officially left Tampa on July 12th. I was eerily calm when I met the guys from Otown... the pop stars I was talking about. I managed to hold in all the rude comments that were jumping at my throat and I managed to cover up my insincerity when I said 'nice to meet you' by throwing in a cough at the end. Then, I was faced with the worst news I had received since this tour businness came about. I was to share a bus with two of the guys from this group. A bus.... thus meaning I was to share the next HALF OF A WHOLE YEAR with two of these guys! I was outraged, but I hid it well. That was one thing I had already mastered, after being in this businness for roughly six months. Hiding my real emotions. So, I was officially, personally introduced to the two guys I would be sharing a bus with. Two guys whom I will now refer to as Spazz and Blondie, but I believe their real names were Dan and Ashley. I chose to call Dan 'Spazz' because when I met him, he was freaking out about something unknown to anyone but him. And Blonde is obviously because Ashley has really nice blue eyes! Haha... just kidding! It's because he has blonde hair. And it seems he has the intellect to accompany it. Next, I was introduced to Phil. Wow, Phil was my kind of man. Pot belly, over-grown goatee and a big, fat truck-driver's hat. I was in love with Phil. He was going to be driving Spazz, Blondie and I around the country. Actually, two countries. We had to visit Canada as well, Eh!! (Canada is the country in which I believe my all-time favourite 'pop star' referred to as "over seas". In case this is news to you, my all-time favourite pop-star is Ms. Britney Spears). So, I reasoned that while Blondie and Spazz were playing playstation and trying to mack, I would read, write, or whatever, closer to Phil at the front of the bus, as he seemed to be more capable of carrying on a decent conversation than either of these two dimwits. I boarded the bus, scared for my life. I chose a 'bunk' of my very own in the back of the bus, and I unpacked. Well, basically I threw my suitcase on the bunk beneath mine. Then, I wandered to the middle of the bus to find Blondie and Spazz sitting in the only two decent seats on the whole thing, so I resigned myself to sitting on a hard plastic thing called a chair. "Here, you don't look too comfortable, take my seat, I'm gonna head into the back anyways." Spazz said, getting up. "Thanks," I said, somewhat amused. I sat down, then I realised I was in very close proximity to Blondie when seated in this chair. In fact, he was right next to me. "So, is this your first tour?" he asked, somewhat hesitant to talk to me. "Yup, and hopefully my last." I replied, adjusting the footrest on my newly acquired laz-e-boy. "What do you mean, hopefully your last? You don't want to tour, just record albums?" "I don't want to do any of it. I'm not a singer, or a performer, I'm a songwriter. I never wanted to sing, and I still don't." I answered. "You don't? I was listening to your album earlier. It's really good. Why wouldn't you want to share something like that with everyone?" Why did he have to be so curious? "Well, I don't feel at home on stage. I just wanted someone to sing my songs, and somehow I got myself into this." "Oh, well...." he didn't know what to say. "I'll try and make it a fun six months for you, then." he concluded, smiling. "Really?" I asked, somewhat surprised. Then, I reminded myself that I was talking to a pop star, and they had been trained to be fake and sincere. "Whatever." "Okay...." Enter Spazz. "Do you guys want something to eat? I'm going to get the driver to stop somewhere, so I thought I would take a vote." "I don't care, I'll eat anything, except Wendy's or Pita Pit." I replied, yawning. "Ya, me too, man. I don't care." Ashley replied. Oops, I mean Blondie. "Okay, I'll get him to stop at the next restaurant. Well, the next one that isn't Wendy's or Pita Pit." Spazz said. Then he winked at me. It took everything I had inside me not to burst out laughing. So I smiled. How corny could I be? Oh God, please save me. The next thing I knew, I was sitting in a diner with Spazz and Blondie trying to order some dinner. The scene before me almost made me laugh, and I was beginning to be surprised at how many times I had almost laughed during this odd day. "So, Kerr, what's it going to be?" Ashley asked. Yikes. I clearly meant Blondie. "I'm going to try the wrap." I replied, unenthusiatic. "Me too." Spazz doubled. "I'm getting a steak." Blondie offered. I almost gagged. Steak is my all-time worst enemy. But, I bit my tongue once again and said nothing. I was almost getting good at being tactful. Dinner only took about 45 minutes, but it was late, so I decided to get some sleep when we got back to the bus. Blondie followed me to the bunks and as I was getting under the covers, I noticed he was pulling a book out of his bag. I know, I was shocked enough already, but then I noticed it WASN'T Dr. Suess! And to top it all off, I saw that it was one of my all time favourites... Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck. Who'd have ever thought that pop stars know how to read? Next... 
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