Act 3
Superman, No More
Superman: The Wedding Album
October 1996
Written by Dan Jurgans, Roger Stern, Karl Kesel, David Michelinie, and Louise Simonson
Drawn by Dan Jurgans, Jerry Ordway, Ron Frenz, John Byrne, Curt Swan, Gil Kane, Stuart Immonen, Tom Grummett, Jon Bogdanove, Barry Kitson, Paul Ryan, and a host of others.
'Superman' created by Jerry Seigel and Joe Shuster
Cut to a local brownstone apartment, somewhere in Metropolis.
Lois and Martha are walking up the stairway with a real-estate agent.
LOIS: Thanks for coming along, Martha.
MARTHA: I know how newlyweds need a place that’s ‘theirs’, Lois. And I’m flattered you value my opinion.
They open the door to the apartment. It’s a very small one.
AGENT: Isn’t this adorable? I mean, it’s so convenient, so cozy!
LOIS: (thinking) So tiny?
The agent looks out the window.
AGENT: And look! You can even see the river! It’s right over…
She opens the curtains to reveal the brick wall of the house next door.
AGENT: Uh…that’s odd. I’m sure it was there yesterday!
LOIS: Ummm, do you have anything else.
*****
Cut to another apartment.
AGENT: …Exterminators spray once a month, like clockwork!
*****
…and another…
AGENT: …water isn’t always brown.
*****
…and again…
AGENT: …electricity should be back on by…
*****
Cut to the next day. Lois and Martha arrive at 1938 Sullivan St.
LOIS: This is that last one, Martha. Keep your fingers crossed!
MARTHA: Don’t be so glum, dear. Sometimes good things do happen to good people.
LOIS: I hope you’re right.
They follow the agent into the apartment. It’s very large, with a fireplace, and a picture window with a view of Centennial Park. It even has a balcony.
LOIS: There’s so much space! And it’s even got a fireplace! This is perfect!
AGENT: I’m so glad you like it, Ms. Lane. And with luck, you should be all settled in time to throw a millennium party!
Lois’s face falls.
LOIS: Millennium? As in, the year 2000?!?
AGENT: Well, this is a prime location, so we do have something of a waiting list. Shall I put you at the bottom?
Lois sighs in frustration.
LOIS: (sadly) Whatever.
*****
Cut to a nearby coffee shop. Lois and Martha are sitting at a table, talking.
MARTHA: I’m sorry the apartment hunt didn’t go better, Lois, but I’m glad it’s given us a chance to chat before the ‘big event’. Are you…ah…sure you two are ready? I mean, what with your recent troubles and all…
LOIS: I appreciate the concern, Martha, but there’s really no need for it. I did some soul-searching while I was overseas, and clarified my priorities. I realized the love Clark and I share is stronger than anything else, including his fear that being ‘killed in action’ would leave me a widow, and my fear that my individuality could become lost.
She smiles.
LOIS: I know now that I can still be who I am, that we can both be whatever we want to be…as long as we’re together.
She looks at her watch.
LOIS: Uh-oh! If I don’t get to the license bureau before it closes, what we won’t be is married! See you tonight!
She gets up and walks away.
MARTHA: Take care, dear!
*****
Cut to the license bureau. Lois steps away from the counter, holding onto a portfolio.
She notices Maggie Sawyer standing near the entrance.
LOIS: Maggie? What are you doing…?
She walks up to her.
LOIS: Of course! As head of the Special Crimes Unit, the courthouse is probably your second home!
MAGGIE: I was just dropping off some paperwork. But what about you…not in trouble again?
Lois chuckles as they walk out the front door.
LOIS: Not yet. I just picked up my wedding license. Which, I have to admit, was a lot easier than finding a good apartment in this town!
MAGGIE: Hmm…I know a building that’s practically empty, and rents should be dirt-cheap! I’m headed that way myself…want to check it out?
They both get into a cab.
LOIS: Sure! But how do you know the building’s empty?
MAGGIE: Well, that’s kind of a long story. A while back…
Cut to Maggie talking to Superman on the roof of police headquarters.
…I met with Superman to inform him of a potentially deadly situation.
Some nut case had contacted Emil Hamilton through S.T.A.R. labs with plans for a devastating weapon, powered by a sliver of stolen kryptonite.
I’d just finished the basic rundown when…
A police officer runs towards them.
OFFICER: Captain Sawyer! The Ace O’ Clubs is on fire! It’s a huge blaze! Gotta be arson!
SUPERMAN: We’re on our way.
Superman grabs Maggie and flies into the air. They head towards the bar.
MAGGIE: Ace O’ Clubs…isn’t that the bar owned by your ‘number one fan’?
SUPERMAN: That’s right…Bibbo Bibbowski. He’s a good man.
They land on the ground, right in front of the burning bar.
MAGGIE: Well, he’s lucky to have such a good friend…it looks like he’s going to need one.
Superman begins to concentrate on the wall, as his x-ray vision allows him to look inside. There are two unconscious people lying on the floor, surrounded by flames.
SUPERMAN: X-ray vision shows two people inside: Bibbo and…Professor Hamilton?!
MAGGIE: Hamilton must’ve gotten the Kryptonite away from the weirdo and gone to his friend Bibbo for help! The lunatic must’ve followed him and torched the bar!
Superman begins to walk towards the bar.
SUPERMAN: I’ve got to…
Maggie steps in front of him, blocking the way.
MAGGIE: No! The closer you get to kryptonite, the weaker you become! You could get trapped, and burn with the others! Let the firefighters handle this one. That’s their job.
A group of firefighters gather around the building.
CHIEF: Some sort of accelerant was used men…flames are white hot! I can’t order you to get closer, but if anyone is willing to volunteer?
Three firefighters move towards the building.
FIREMAN # 1: Geez, Chief, after all these years you had to ask?
FIREMAN # 2: C’mon, guys, let’s do it!
SUPERMAN: They’re the real heroes. But will even their efforts be enough?
Maggie walks up to the fire chief.
MAGGIE: What are their chances, Chief?
CHIEF: Not good, Captain Sawyer. I don’t think anything we’ve got can snuff those flames. An’ by now there’s barely enough oxygen left in that building to fill a hamster’s lungs.
Superman walks forward.
SUPERMAN: I’m going in! Those are my friends…
Captain Sawyer blocks his way.
MAGGIE: And you think they’d want you to die with them? Just stay calm…let the professionals take their shot.
The firefighters move towards the doorway.
FIREMAN # 1: Easy guys. Watch out for…
Without warning, an outburst of intense flame darts out, consuming the three of them.
FIREMAN # 1: …BACKDRAFT! AHHHH!
FIREMAN # 2: OH, GOD! I-I’M BURNING!!! I’M BURNING!!!
Their charred bodies fall to the ground.
Seeing this, the fire chief blocks the path of the other firefighters.
CHIEF: That’s it! I’m not risking any more lives! Hose down the adjoining structures! At least we can keep the fire from spreading!
Behind them, Superman concentrates his vision until he begins to peer through the wall. He sees Professor Hamilton lying on the ground, and Bibbo trying to help him up.
SUPERMAN: But Bibbo and Professor Hamilton…they’re moving! They’re still alive!
His eyes narrow.
SUPERMAN: And no matter what the risk, as long as I can do something…they’ll stay that way!
Suddenly, he leaps into the air and flies towards the building.
MAGGIE: SUPERMAN!
He dives into the flames.
CHIEF: Save your breath, Captain. Nobody’s stopping him!
Inside the club, Superman heads towards where Bibbo and Hamilton are.
SUPERMAN: (thinking) Got to fly as fast as I can, push them close to an exit before I get too week to…huh? I’m not getting weak? But the Kryptonite…?
He sweeps the two of them up and heads towards the window.
BIBBO: S-sooperman! Hey (coughs) thanks, pal! S-sorry I ain’t much help! (coughs again) Bunch o’ punks broke in ta rob the place! I decked three o’ the little spuds but then one maced me…just ‘fore he made off wit’ that green rock the prof wuz showin’ me!
He brings his two friends over to the firefighters.
SUPERMAN: Get these men medical attention, fast!
Then to goes back into the air.
SUPERMAN: (thinking) Since most of the oxygen is gone from the building anyway, I’ll use super-breath to remove the rest of it and smother the flames.
He hovers over the top of the club and takes a deep breath. Soon enough, the smoke starts to dissipate, and the flames die down. Below, people are looking up at him, cheering and applauding.
Bibbo smiles.
BIBBO: Now that’s why he’s muh fav’rit!
The building saved, Superman lands back on the ground, where Maggie is talking to Professor Hamilton. Hamilton has a breathing mask on.
MAGGIE: Professor Hamilton! The Kryptonite…?
EMIL: Y-young toughs…absconded with it! R-RAN (coughs) north!
Superman turns around, ready to go after them. Maggie tries to stop him one last time.
MAGGIE: Wait, Superman! It’s too dangerous! You can’t…!
SUPERMAN: You’re wrong, Maggie. I can!
He takes off into the air.
And, of course, he did!
Cut to present day. Lois and Maggie arrive at the old ‘Ace o’ Clubs’ bar.
LOIS: (thinking) Of course. Clark always does what he has to. That’s one of the basics I’ve finally accepted.
MAGGIE: Here we are. It’s not exactly the Ritz-Carlin, but…
They walk inside and are shocked by their surroundings. Both the walls and furniture are charred black.
LOIS: Phew. Smells like the local high school held its homecoming bonfire here!
MAGGIE: Hmm…it does push the term ‘fixer-upper’ to a new level. Sorry, Lois. When the state inspector certified the building as sound, I had no idea it was still in such rough shape.
LOIS: That’s ok, Maggie. It’s the thought that counts.
She sighs.
LOIS: (thinking) And I can’t help thinking how this makes me want that last apartment Martha and I looked at even more!
*****
Cut to outside Siegel Electronics. Clark is walking by, on his way back from the Daily Planet.
CLARK: (thinking) Last-minute crises kept me at the planet later than I expected. Have to rush to pick up those gifts I ordered for the ushers at our wedding. I just hope the electronics shop doesn’t close before I…
He freezes. Inside, a boy with a gun is forcing the owner to fill a purse up with money.
CLARK: (thinking) A hold-up? I’ve got to…to what? I’m vulnerable now! A gunshot could kill me! What would Lois say…?
The decision takes only seconds. He knows what he has to do.
Quickly, he darts into a nearby alley, loosening his tie.
CLARK: (thinking) No, those worries are over. More than anyone in the world, Lois knows who I am…and who I have to be!
He rips open his shirt to reveal the blue shirt, and the yellow-and-red symbol of Superman!
*****
Back in front of the store, the kid races out. Before he can get far, Superman steps out in front of him.
KID: SUPERMAN?!
He pulls out the gun and aims it.
KID: B-back off! I-I’ll kill ya!
Superman simply crosses his arms in defiance.
SUPERMAN: Or you might just make me very angry.
Buying the bluff, the kid drops both his gun and the money on the ground. He then runs into the alley.
KID: O-okay, you win! Here’s the cash! I-I’ll trade the loot for my freedom!
SUPERMAN: You know it doesn’t work that way!
The kid doesn’t listen. He just keeps running.
The storeowner comes out, seeing his money on the ground.
SUPERMAN: Call the police! And make sure no one touches that gun before they get here!
OWNER: Yessir!
Then Superman takes off after the thief.
*****
Meanwhile, the thief continues to run, looking behind him.
He doesn’t notice someone land in his path.
KID: He’s not behind me! Oh, wow, I’m faster than…
He runs into the newcomer.
KID: Ulp! Shoulda known I couldn’t outrun Big Blue!
Then he sees her. A powerful-looking red-haired woman is staring down at him. She’s wearing green body armor and a yellow cape.
WOMAN: Make that ‘Big Green’!
She grabs him by the neck and lifts him off the ground. Just in time for Superman to arrive.
SUPERMAN: MAXIMA! Put him down!
She turns to see Superman, who is panting…he’s not used to being short of breath.
She smiles.
MAXIMA: Ah. I’ve been looking for you.
Casually, she tosses the kid backwards into a pile of trash.
MAXIMA: I’ve decided to give you another chance to become my life-mate. With you at my side, we could restore the glory of both our bloodlines. All it would take would be the marrying together of our strengths.
SUPERMAN: (panting) Lady, you’re just a little…late!
MAXIMA: Out of breath? You? But…
She uses her telepathic powers to read his mind.
MAXIMA: …no! At the surface of your thoughts…the truth? YOU’VE LOST YOUR POWERS!!!
She flies into the air, attempting to leave as fast as she can.
MAXIMA: I offered myself to a HUMAN?! A creature no more worthy than any other wretch on this backward planet? How…humiliating!
Back on the ground, Superman begins to chuckle. He checks on the thief, who is still unconscious.
SUPERMAN: (thinking) Yes, it was. But at least she’s out of my hair for now. Finally, being without powers actually did me some good!
*****
Cut to downtown, at the apartment of Perry and Alice White.
Jonathan and Martha are sitting with the couple in the living room.
Perry, however, is in rough shape. He’s very skinny, and his hair has gotten pretty thin.
ALICE: Perry, you and Jonathan sit and make yourselves comfortable. Martha and I are going to the kitchen for cocoa.
MARTHA: And a little girl talk.
They exit, leaving Perry and Jonathan as the sole people in the room.
PERRY: I’ve been wondering, Jon, did I ever thank you? For convincing me to give up smoking?
Jonathan’s eyes go wide.
JONATHAN: B-but, Perry! You’ve got, well…lung cancer!
PERRY: Yes, but I’ve got a chance to beat it. If I hadn’t stopped when I did, I’d be gone now. Thanks.
Perry smiles, causing Jonathan to blush.
JONATHAN: Heck, Perry, I…I was just being a friend. Say, it’s too bad you aren’t up to attending Clark’s bachelor party tonight. You will be at the wedding, won’t you?
Perry laughs.
PERRY: Are you kidding? Even Superman couldn’t keep me away!