The young blonde haired soldier awoke. He felt like he had been sleeping for days, and he felt like he could sleep for several more. But he forced his eyes to remain open.
He heard a nurse talking with a young woman. He could hardly hear what they where saying, but he still heard it.
"Mrs. Brooks your husband's fever broke yesterday and his infection has gone way down. The doctor says he’s out of the woods and with a few more weeks rest he should be good as knew."
He heard the two women coming closer to his cot as the footsteps got louder and closer. Then he heard them stop right at the foot of his cot. He turned to see a beautiful red head with green eyes. She was well dressed with her hair up in a bun and wearing a fashionable dress.
The woman's face soon became confused as she saw this stranger that was supposed to be her husband but wasn't. She turned to the nurse.
"Nurse this isn't my husband. There must be some mistakes with the records or something."
"Mrs. Brooks he had your husbands tags in his hand. I am very sorry for this confusion we will get to the bottom of this."
The young soldier looked at the woman. She slowly took a seat on the empty cot next to his. She looked into his eyes. They looked so familiar even though he wasn't.
"Sir who are you?"
"I'm Brian Cooper..." The young soldier said.
"Your making wonderful progress Matthew. If your still doing well by tomorrow I'll let you go home." Dr. Porter told Matthew and his parents after he finished conducting his examination.
Dr. Porter left and let Matthew put back on his shirt. He carefully slipped his other arm into the sleeve. His chest was still sore where he had been shot. Matthew looked at his mother. Even though the doctor told her that he would be alright. She still looked worried.
“Ma I’m going to be fine.” He told her in a soft voice.
“I know, but the thought of how close we came to losing you...” Michaela stopped herself as she felt tears coming down her face. “I know Ma. I was really scared that I might not make it this time. But I was lucky I did.” He told her as she sat on the bed next to him.
“Yeah, but your luck may not last forever Matthew.” She said in a serious voice.
“Yeah. Ma why were you all in Virginia?” Matthew asked.
“Matthew, Brian... He was killed in combat... They said that he and several others from his regiment were mistaken for Indians and were fired upon. Only a few survived...” Michaela lowered her head.
Matthew felt like his heart had just been ripped from his chest. His little brother had been killed and he didn’t know about it. He wasn’t there to say goodbye to him, or to put him to rest in his final resting place.
“Oh God, Ma. This can’t be happening. This must be all bad dream and I’m going to wake up and Brian will be alive and well.” Matthew said as if trying to convince himself of his own words.
Matthew leaned against his mother and held onto her. He felt his hot tears stream down his face. He couldn’t stop them, and didn’t even try to stop them.
“Matthew we did send you a telegram. Maybe it just never got there.” Michaela spoke softly to her eldest son.
“Ma, I wasn’t there. I never got to say goodbye to him. I don’t even know where he is buried.” He replied as he choked back his tears.
“He was buried in Arlington. He was awarded a medal for bravery. He would have been honored to receive it. Brian was always strong and courageous. He never backed down from his dreams. I just don’t know how we are going to make it through this.” Michaela said quietly.
“Ma how did Colleen take the news of Brian’s death?” Matthew asked.
“Colleen suffered a miscarriage only a few weeks before the funeral and she was very sad. Brian’s death only made it worse. Then when she learned of you being shot she couldn’t come with us. She told me it was just to much pain for her. She has a lot on her shoulders right now.” Michaela answered her son’s question.
“Poor Colleen. I can’t imagine the pain she is going through. I know that you can Ma, after you suffered your miscarriage a few years back.” Matthew told his mother in a quiet voice.
A single tear rolled down Michaela’s cheek at the thought of her lost child. It had been such a painful and heartbreaking loss to her and Sully. The emotional pain that had been left behind had taken her along time to get over. Her heart went out to her daughter as she knew all to familiar the pain from losing a child.
“Yes I can understand what she is going through. But Colleen doesn’t understand something as I did.” Michaela spoke caringly to her son.
“What’s that?” Matthew asked as he watched his mother’s expression very seriously.
“She doesn’t realize that she wasn’t the only one who lost that child. Andrew also lost that child, and this might sound selfish but Colleen is to wrapped up in her own pain to see that he is also grieving.”
Matthew looked at his hands and spoke softly, ”When I lost Ingrid I felt like Colleen does now. I had a closeness to Ingrid that I felt no one else had or understood, and I think Colleen feels like that she had that closeness that Andrew or we can’t understand or didn’t have. I know it might sound crazy but when I was off by myself all I could think about why Ingrid had died and left me all alone. I don’t know if Sully ever told you, but after you all came out to the railroad camp. Sully came to talk to me. He showed me that I was angry at her for leaving me to live on by myself with this great pain pushing against me.”
“I know how that feels. When David came dressed in his uniform and announced he was leaving in two days I felt so angry and scared all at once. Then when we got word of his death I walked alongside the Charles and I cursed at him for leaving without discussing his decision with me. I blamed him for my pain because I felt he didn’t take into his consideration my feelings and our future. Later I came to see that he did what he thought was right, and even though I hated to admit it I knew he had been right all along.” Michaela spoke as she looked deeply into her eldest sons eyes.
Matthew put his arms around his mother. He could feel her pain just as she could feel his. They knew from that moment on that their lives would never be the same again. They knew that they had lost a person so dear and close to them that it would change their lives forever more.
Sully and Michaela were laying in bed that night. They were holding onto one another. Sully began to kiss Michaela’s lips and her cheeks. He could feel his longing and passions for her beginning to stir. He wanted to be with her, he needed to be with her, just as she needed to be with him.
Michaela kissed his chests and lips. Then they began to take each others clothes off. Soon they were naked laying in each others arms. Then they became one in a sweet melody that was beautiful and one of their greatest nights of passion in their lives. It was a night of understanding and of finding inner strength within themselves.
Brian and Melanie were talking while her five year old son Aaron and three year old daughter Anna played on the floor with their toys.
“We were in the middle of battle and James asked me to get word to you. He talked about you and your two children all the time. He truly loved you. He was a good friend of mine. I heard him scream as the cannons exploded. And then there was the burning pain, and he died right there on the battlefield. He was a good man. He didn’t deserve to die, not like that.” Brian continued to talk to Melanie.
“You were a good friend to James. He wrote about you and your family and how you would tell him stories about your childhood. He always said that he only knew you for a short year, but he felt like he knew you a lifetime. I felt the same. I felt like your words were speaking through me. You reminded me so much of my brother William. He always loved to sit for hours and stare at nature.” Melanie told Brian softly.
“What became of your brother?” Brian asked gently.
“He was killed in the Civil War. The battle of Gettysburg. He was the only family I had left, except James, and my children.” Melanie told him as she began to cry.
Brian got up from his cot and sat beside her. He pulled her into his embrace and held her. She was so sad from the memories of her dead brother, and the news of her husband’s death.
“I don’t know how I am going to go on without James. He helped me through William’s death. I loved him so much.” Melanie spoke truthfully.
“I will help you, if that is alright.” Brain spoke softly to her.
“You will?” She asked.
Brian slowly and tenderly placed his lips on her. The kiss lasted a few moments. But Melanie did not pull away. His lips and his touch were so comfortable. As if she knew him all her life. She loved the safe and comfortable feeling that he brought her. She pulled back as her children started giggling. They jumped up on Brian and Melanie’s laps and started to laugh and play with them.
Andrew finished packing the rest of his belongings. The suitcase all stood by the door that night. Their clothes had been laid out for the next day, and they had booked their train tickets to Chicago. But Andrew felt like they still weren’t ready to leave. He felt like they had unfinished business left to do.
He heard Colleen come inside. She had gone for a walk over an hour ago. She looked so red and she looked so very tired of fighting the inner pain. He went to her side and brought her into his embrace. She felt his warmth that was once so safe and inviting to her. She could feel herself falling for the first time since all the pain had started. She felt herself so vulnerable at that moment. And then the world spun out of control. It was out of her control, and she finally began to understand. That is was alright to fall apart and not be able to pick yourself up. But she found herself not alone, her husband was right beside her in the pain. He felt is as much and as deep as she did. She held onto him and began to cry, as did he. The night was long, and filled with much sadness, but it was the time they truly began to heal together.
The next morning Michaela, Sully, Katie and John all dressed early to meet Matthew. They left their hotel and got in the carriage. Then they made their way to the hospital. They arrived there within a half hour. Sully helped his wife and children down from the carriage. They walked through the front doors and made their way to Matthew’s room.
When they opened the door and walked inside. Matthew was sitting up in bed. He was dressed in his own clothes. He had his suitcase packed and sitting beside him. John and Katie ran to their older brother and hugged him tightly. Michaela smiled and leaned in toward Sully and watched their three children laughing.
Within an hour they had Matthew checked out of the hospital and they arrived at his home shortly afterward. Michaela and Sully got Matthew up in his own bed and made sure that he was comfortable.
Then Michaela left the room to prepare lunch and keep an eye on her two children who would probably find some trouble to get into. Sully and Matthew were left alone to talk for the first time since they had arrived at Matthew’s bedside in New York.
Matthew finally began to cry. Sully walked to the bed and sat down. He took his son into his arms and held onto him. Matthew still let his tears fall. He needed Sully to help guide him through his pain.
“Sully he’s really gone. I still can’t believe my little brother is really gone.” Matthew spoke in desperation.
“I know Matthew. We couldn’t believe it either. We were as lost and sad as you are now. He was everything to all of us.” Sully spoke from his heart.
“What changed?” Matthew asked carefully.
“We leaned on one another. We didn’t push aside our loved ones and fall by ourselves. We held onto one another. And I’m not saying it hurts any less, but it is easier to face it with your loved ones, then facing it alone.” Sully told his son.
“Oh God. I can’t stop this aching in my heart. It hurts so much. Even worse then when Ingrid died. I feel like I have lost something so close to me.”
“Matthew I have watched you in the last several years struggle and fall. You have become a man and yet you were still lost as if you were searching for something. I always hoped you find your place and that restlessness would stop. Have you ever found that place?” Sully asked Matthew.
“Yes. In the courtroom I am a different person. I feel in control, and I feel comfortable there. I love being a lawyer and making sure there is justice in a case.” Matthew spoke through his tears.
“Then you will get through this. I know when I found my place with the Cheyenne I felt more able to handle the sorrow. Instead of with Abigail and Hannah I was lost. Wandering searching as you were after Ingrid died.” Sully replied.
Michaela walked upstairs. She knocked on Matthew’s door. She heard Matthew tell her to come in. She opened the door and walked inside the room.
“Lunch is ready.” She told her son and husband.
“I’ll be down in a minute, I want to freshen up first.” Matthew told his mother and father.
Michaela took Sully’s hand and they walked hand in hand out of their son’s bedroom and downstairs. They sat down at the large rectangle oak table. John and Katie were already seated on the other side.
Matthew walked to the powder room. He washed his face and combed his hair back. He felt a little better after his talk with Sully, but his pain still hurt so deep. He hurt for his little sister, and brother, and his whole family.
He finished cleaning up and then made his way down the long hallway to the staircase and downstairs. He loved his large home, but it was so bare. He wanted to get married and have children, and he hoped that he would one day.
He took his seat at the table. They all joined hands and prayed together. Then they all sat and began to eat lunch together. John and Katie started to chatter on about missing Alex and the twins. Sully took his wife’s hand. He knew that she missed them all as much as he did.
“Matthew we will probably stay a few days, and then I think were going to head back home.” Sully spoke to his eldest son.
“Do you have to go home so soon. I was hoping that you could stay awhile and I could visit with all of you.” Matthew replied.
“Well Katie’s got school, and Michaela has to get back to the hospital. And we all miss the kids.” Sully spoke the truth.
“Yeah, you must have been gone awhile now.” Matthew said.
“Matthew why don’t you come with us?” Katie asked eagerly.
“Oh sweetheart, Matthew would love to, but he has so much work here.” Michaela told her daughter.
“Why don’t I?” Matthew shocked everyone by saying it out loud.
“Matthew are you sure?” Sully asked his son.
“Yeah. I can close my office for a couple weeks and take a vacation. Besides I never take time off. So I should.” Matthew spoke seriously.
Katie ran in his arms. Matthew looked at his father. Sully then understood what he was getting at. He nodded his head at his eldest son. Matthew gave him a small smile. Katie started jumping up and down excitedly. The rest of the meal was filled with laughs by the children. But still Matthew still felt sad.
“Brian where is your family?” Melanie asked as she stopped her reading.
“In Colorado Springs. My ma Dr. Mike, and my pa Sully have a homestead there. She is a doctor and runs the hospital there, and my pa works for the government and is trying to preserve the land.” Brian told her.
“They seem to be well off for themselves.” Melanie spoke with disappointment in her voice.
“What’s wrong Melanie?” Brian asked concerned.
“I just wish my children had that stability and family you do.” Melanie spoke the truth.
“Maybe they can.” Brian told her.
“What do you mean?” Melanie asked him.
“Marry me.” Brian finally spoke.
“Brian...I don’t....do you mean it?” She finally spoke.
“Yes. I know we have only know each other a few days, but I feel like I have known you for years. I love you, and I love you children. Marry Me?” Brian spoke softly.
“I love you too and Anna and Aaron really love you too. So Yes Brian I will marry you.” She finally said.
Brian brought her in his embrace. He held onto her. He finally kissed her tenderly, but with much passion. She held onto the kiss. She loved him so much. She knew she was making the right decision.
Colleen and Andrew got off the train to meet their family. Soon they saw Michaela and Sully. Colleen and Andrew walked up to them and hugged each of them. Then they made their way to Matthew’s.
They arrived a few minutes later. They all got down from the carriage. They went to the front door. It opened and Matthew and John and Katie were all waiting for them. John and Katie ran into Colleen and Andrew’s arms. Then Colleen slipped through the small crowd and made her way to her older brother. She hugged him for a long time, and didn’t let go. Finally she pulled back and placed a kiss on his cheek.
“Matthew I was so worried about you. I don’t think I could take another... I am just glad your really alright.” Colleen told her older brother as he embraced her once again.
“Yeah, me too sis. Me too.” Matthew told her.
Then they all went inside. Colleen and Andrew got themselves settled in their room and then they all went downstairs and enjoyed dinner together. They all knew that they had a long journey ahead of them in the next few days. As they were going to all travel across country back to Colorado Springs.
“I would like to make a toast to Matthew. Matthew, you are a good brother-in-law. I hope you all the happiness, and I hope that you find someone to love as much as Colleen and I and as Michaela and Sully are.” Andrew told everyone as he held up his glass that night.
“Thank you Andrew. Now lets all dance.” Matthew spoke.
Soon Matthew was dancing with Katie and John, while Michaela and Sully danced, and Colleen and Andrew danced. They were all laughing and having a good time together as a family. After so much pain in the last month it brought a smile to Michaela and Sully’s faces as they watched their family smiling and enjoying themselves.
Brian finished packing the rest of his belongings. He picked up his suitcase and joined his fiance and his future children outside. They made their way to the train station. Then they all boarded the train and made sure that the children were comfortable, when the train pulled out.
Brian sat and wrote a letter to his parents. He would mail it at the next stop. He hoped that they were all alright. He couldn’t bare it if something had happened to either of them. They were his family and they meant so much to him.
The words seemed to come easily as he finished writing the letter and signed his name. He knew his letter would be there before he would. He and Melanie were headed to San Francisco to finish up last minute business about her home, and collect their belongings.
Brian watched the scenery change as they left the Wyoming landscape. He felt Melanie put her hand in his. He turned to her and smiled. She planted a small kiss on his cheek. Brian felt the warmth from her lips. He kissed her on the lips. She didn’t pull back, but savored the moment.
Michaela watched as the train slowly got closer to her home. She had been gone a whole month. She missed her babies. She could picture Alex walking and saying more words all the time, and the twins trying to crawl on the ground, and teething. It had been so long since she had seen them.
Sully put his arm around her shoulder. He knew what she thinking, he was thinking the same thing. He wanted to hold his baby daughter and son in his arms. And throw Alex in the air and then catch her and hear her laugh in joy. He had missed that while they were away.
Soon Michaela and Sully fell asleep in each other’s arms late at night. Michaela began to dream of a time when she and Sully had been just friends and it was her first year with the three children who’s well being depended upon her.
She dreamed of when she had married Sully, and when their first child was born. The dreams became more vivid as she took a journey to her past. But then the end of her dream was of the future.
It was at their homestead, it was as it looked in the present, only it was cold and snowy outside. Inside Michaela and Sully sat at the head part of the table. Brian was there, with a young red haired woman beside him, and two children with blonde hair, and blue eyes. Michaela didn’t recognize the children or the young woman.
Then Matthew was their with a woman with brown eyes and fair blonde hair. She has scars on her hands, from what Michaela thought to be a fire. And Katie was a couple years older, as were John and Alex and the twins. She would guess maybe a year or two older. And they were all seated at the table, with heads bowed, and hands folded.
Michaela saw herself. Her abdomen was swollen with child. She couldn't believe it. Then Colleen and Andrew arrived shortly after the group had finsished praying. Colleen held a small bundle or joy in her arms. A baby with light brown hair, and blue eyes, as blue as the sky. Michaela awoke suddenly.
She felt that it had to be a dream, but it all felt so real to her. But she knew in her mind it could never come true because of Brian's death. But her heart told her that her son was alive somewhere. She lay awake the rest of the night.
The train made it's way to the depot. Several of the townspeople had gathered around to welcome home Sully and Michaela after their long journey. The train soon came to a complete stop.
Soon Michaela, Sully, John, Katie, Matthew, Colleen, and Andrew had stepped onto the platform. Michaela skimmed the crowd for her three youngest children. She found Alex standing beside Grace. And Michaela saw Danielle in Grace's arms. Michaela turned and looked at her husband. He was thinking the same thing as she was. They ran through the large crowd until they were only feet from their children.
Michaela held out her arms to Danielle. She looked at her mother, and went into her waiting arms willingly. Sully waited for Alex to come to him. When she saw him she ran into her father's strong arms. Sully held onto her tightly, but gently. He had missed his little girl so much. Then he thought to his youngest son, which he had not seen.
"Grace where is David? Is he alright?" Sully asked anxiously.
“He’s right here Sully.” Robert E. spoke as he made his way through the crowd with the young child in his arms.
Soon Sully saw the familiar face of his youngest son. He opened his free arm and David went straight into it. Sully held his son and daughter close to his chest, close to his heart. He loved them both so much. And he missed them the whole month while they had been gone.
Soon Matthew, Colleen, Andrew, Katie, and John joined them. They all embraced one another. Then they all got into two wagons and made their way to the Sully homestead. Soon they were all inside, sitting in the living room. Colleen and Michaela left the group to go make supper.
While Michaela and Colleen were in the Kitchen, Andrew, Sully, and Matthew all were keeping an eye on the children. Alex sat on her father’s lap the whole time. She had missed him for a whole month and wasn’t willing to let go of him.
Katie was playing blocks, while Danielle tried to help, but kept knocking them down on her. Then John was on all fours pretending to be a horse, while David clapped happily and watched his older brother run around the room.
The Children’s joy, brought joyful laughs to the whole family. It had been so long since they had all laugh with so much passion and happiness. They were slowly moving on, but they would never forget the troubles they had all had in the last few weeks.
Soon everyone was seated at the table for dinner. They all bowed their heads and held hands as they prayed together as a family. After they finished praying they all began to eat and chatter about their lives, and how much they all missed being home again.
“Sully, do you think will get past all of this?” Michaela asked hopeful.
“I think we are already heading there.” He told her, as he took her hand and kissed it.
A knock came on the front door. Sully let go of Michaela’s hand and slowly made his way to the front door. He turned the handle, and opened the door. There in front of him stood his son, a woman and two children. Sully couldn’t believe his eyes.
Brian watched his father carefully. His face was white, and he looked shocked to see him. Brian stepped forward and embraced his father. Sully held onto his son tightly. He couldn’t believe it, but he did.
Michaela ran from her seat. She embraced her son as tightly as her arms would squeeze. Brian felt like he couldn’t breathe with his mother’s arms so sung around his chest.
“Ma I can’t breathe.” Brian said as he gasped for air.
“I’m sorry Brian, it’s just...we thought... we got word that you had been killed in a battle.” Michaela said as she wiped away her tears.
“Oh God they must have mistaken James for me. I held him in my arms as he died. I took his tags to give to his wife. But then I was wounded and they mistook me for James in the hospital.”
“We are just glad that your alright.” Michaela said as she hugged her son again.
Soon they all got up and embraced one another. And Melanie, Aaron, and Anna were accepted into their family with open arms. And they were all thankful to have one another. They had a long journey filled with pain, but they had found the inner strength to go on, even when they wanted to give up, they still didn’t. Their hearts had all led them home, to where it all began, to where they wanted to belong.