What about me...? by Koudelka- CHAPTER FOUR

Chapter Four: Him

My heart nearly stops. Seifer. Of course.

"Seifer." I say. I look at Seifer, who smiles.

"Ah, its nice to see two young lovebirds. I remember when Edea and I were your age..." Seifer clears his throat loudly. "Right. Um, Quistis Trepe, you are now a Rank C SeeD. That's as high as they go. There are only three of you. Xu, Squall and yourself. I'm sorry about all of this... but rules are rules." You aren't really sorry, you bastard, or you'd change them.

"Quistis Trepe, you are dismissed. Mr. Almasy, however, stay." My heart stops for a minute. I salute him, and walk out the door. I wait outside for Seifer. I'm worried about Seifer. Cid hated him ever since the incident. I can hear their conversation.

"Well, I hope you are proud of yourself! You've seduced poor Quistis into love! And she's lost her job because of you! You know you don't love her! Stop pretending, Seifer Almasy."

"Fuck you, Cid. I love her plenty, you wouldn't know, either!"

"EXCUSE ME!!!!! How DARE you! Three day suspension! That's it! I'll have Xu bring this to your dorm later! LEAVE my office. NOW!!!" The door swings open.

"Seifer...?" I say.

"Fucking bastard! Just as bad as Leonheart!"

"Seifer... you shouldn't have..."

"I HAD to... That bastard's been deciding shit for me since I was little!" He says. We walk toward the elevator. We ride down in silence.

"So, you just have to stay in Balamb for the next three days...?" I ask.

"No, just my dorm. If I tell the GARDEN faculty about this, hah, they'll have Cid banned."

"How so?"

"Headmasters aren't supposed to tell students what they do and do not feel. Its just morally wrong." Heh, yeah, you know about morally wrong things, Seifer.

"I see..."

"So... my dorm. All day, all night. Nah, I'll probably sneak out at night. The GARDEN faculty will bring me shit from the cafeteria... The cheap stuff though."

"...How do you know all this?"

"I've been suspended before..."

"Heh heh, I see..."

"Yeah... So, uh, why don't ya head to my dorm, I'll meet you there... erm, soon."

"Okay." I walk towards his dorm. No longer an instructor... What if what Cid said was right?

"Heey, Instructor!" A student said, walking by. Instructor... Dammit Seifer, what Cid said had better not be true.

"Hey..." I say, and continue to walk. I don't see what Cid's problem is... He couldn't have just let me be?! I continue walking toward Seifer's dorm. I finally arrive, and I let myself in. It feels weird, to be there, alone, in some one else's dorm. I glance around. The place is fairly empty. Just a bed, bathroom, and clothes. I sit on his bed and wait. Fifteen minutes pass. I yawn, and lay back on his bed. The bed is firmer than my own, soft bed. I realize I like firm beds better than my own soft bed. I run my hand over the pillow, it smells of Seifer- leather and blood.

I guess I must have fell asleep, because when I woke up, Seifer was sitting there.

"I'm sorry..." I say, sitting up, and straightening my hair.

"No, its fine." He hands me a pink slip. It says "Three day- in dorm suspension."

"...Hm." I say.

"You know, they could at least do this during the week-when I get to miss class, but no, its the weekend that they do this... At least I get Monday off."

"Yeah..." I say. I feel responsible for this somehow. But then again, it looks like we both have to make some of sacrifice for this... But what is "this"?

"Where did you go?" I ask.

"I had to go stock up on good food. Such as hot dogs and beer." I can't help but laugh. "Hey, its not funny. They bring me like, carrots to eat." I smile at him.

"Okay. I get your point."

"Hey, I gotta ask you a favor."

"Hmm?"

"You gotta come and get me at night when the halls are clear. There is no way I'm actually going to stay here this whole time!"

"Okay, I will."

"Thanks."

"Mhm." I glance around the room, wanting to pick up anything interesting, but nothing has changed.

"What are you looking for?" He asks.

"Nothing in particular." I say.

"Okay..."

"Quistis Trepe, please report to the headmaster's office." The intercom.

"Oh, come ON. What the hell do they want now?" Seifer asks. I shrug.

"I'll be back, Seifer."

"Sure." I walk out the door and find my way to the elevator. I go up, and arrive at the headmaster's office.

"Ms. Trepe..."

"Yes?"

"...I really don't want to lose an instructor... I just want to make sure you realize something. I've known Seifer since he was little... You have too. But, he doesn't like to share... and he isn't into commitment. Now, Seifer is temporary. He'll go away after a month or two. Your job, however, is forever. Now... please, think about this."

"Seifer just never wanted to commit!" I protest. "No one EVER cared for him. Not you, and not Edea! Not Rinoa. No one! So, tell me, why should-he-share?! ...But me! I care for him. He finally has a reason to LIVE!! You just want to take it away... Don't you...? Just... leave me alone. I've made my decision..." I turn and head out the door. I can't believe I said all of that... to the headmaster. I walk aimlessly to my own dorm, and lay on my bed, and think. Seifer, will you commit? Oh, Seifer... I pull on a pair of black shorts and my blue "SeeD, we do it all," sweatshirt. I love that sweatshirt, its comfortable. At around midnight, I walk through the halls of the dorms. I guess I'm heading to Seifer's dorm, I can never be sure. I find myself at Seifer's dorm, and I knock.

"Who is it?"

"Um, Quistis." I say. I hear Seifer get up and walk over. The door opens.

"Where'd you go?" He asks, letting me in.

"...To talk to Cid."

"Took you a long time."

"Then I went back to my dorm."

"Oh... What'd Cid have to say?" ...Nothing. Nothing that'd concern you... Hyne..

"Um, just... some stuff about my job..."

"What about it?"

"He just... wanted to make sure that I was sure."

"Oh... Your face tells me something happened..." What? Am I making a face? Or does he know me better than I thought...?

"Nothing really, Seifer."

"Oh, come on, Quistis..."

"He just said... said, that you couldn't commit to anyone, and that you were a temporary person... and that my job wasn't just temporary..." Seifer stayed unusally quiet.

"You... took your job back..." He finally says with a hurt expression on his face.

"N, no!" I say. "How could I? I didn't believe Cid for a minute..."

"...Maybe you should've. What if he's right? What if I can't commit!? I don't want to hurt you, Quistis..." I take a deep breath.

"You can commit, if you want to. You can commit just as much as anyone else can! You just have to want to."

"...How are you so sure?"

"Because I trust you." I do. I really do trust you, Seifer. "I trust you with everything inside of me. If my trust fails me, I will have enjoyed it, while it lasted, and thats something I cannot let go of..." I can feel my eyes water. Don't cry, Quistis. Don't cry. He reaches over towards me and puts his arms around me. I never thought I'd be held...

"I love you, Quistis." Those words! Oh, those words... I never thought I'd hear them.

"I, I love you too, Seifer." I murmer. He holds me close for a few more moments.

"Hey, lets, um, go out, I've been locked up in this room too long. The halls are clear, right?"

"Yeah..." I say. We walk out into the halls, and walk around the dorms for awhile. After a while, we pass Squall's dorm. Yelling. Oh no, an arguement.

"WHAT?! I'm not allowed to care!?"

"Well, you sure act like I can't either!"

"Squall! You just don't care! You don't even try to care!"

"Get the hell out of my dorm, Rinoa!"

"FINE!" The door opens and Rinoa runs out. To my surprise, she runs up to Seifer and hugs him... Little bitch.

"Seifer... Oh, Seifer... I'm so sorry..." She says, crying into his shoulder. Seifer doesn't look at me. He whispers something to Rinoa... Bastard. I go unnoticed. Again. Seifer... how can you do this?! Just the instructor. Or no! Not even that anymore. I just turn on my heel and walk toward my dorm.

End Chapter.

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