Bad on two levels. Walter was surprised his legs had carried him to their front door. Friday night and he was exhausted. He just managed to get his key in the door and drag himself over the threshold. Immediately, Alex was on his feet. ‘Walter, are you okay?’ Alex’s panicked tone pulled Fox away from the stew he was stirring in the kitchen and into the living room. ‘Walter, what’s wrong?’ Quickly, Walter reassured: ‘I’m just tired. Thanks Alex.’ He shrugged his coat off and Alex hung it up. ‘Siddown and I’ll fix you a drink. Fox is making dinner. It won’t be long. Are you sure you’re just tired?’ Walter wished he’d been able to force a little more energy into his entrance. Alex was a now bundle of nerves, managing to spill a little of Walter’s drink before handing it to him with a shaking hand. He felt guilty and put an arm out. Immediately Alex dropped onto the couch next to him and pressed himself against Walter’s side, snuggling against his ribcage as Walter’s arm wrapped around him, pulling him close. ‘Yeah, it’s been a long week. Never mind. It’s the weekend.’ Alex relaxed slowly under Walter’s comforting grip, but almost jumped off the couch when Fox called through: ‘Come and eat.’ Walter got up, pulling Alex to his feet. He dropped a quick kiss on the top of his head. ‘I’m okay Alex. Really. I’m just tired. I’ll be fine. Okay?’ ‘Sure.’ Alex said, a little too quickly. ************ Walter noticed he was getting more than his fair share of the very nice bottle of wine Fox had brought home with him. And he hadn’t missed the strawberries in the refrigerator. He said nothing. From experience, he knew he wouldn’t have to wait long. As he ate, and the flow of conversation continued, he fretted over the possible causes of yet another what he called ‘guilt meal’. Complaints about Fox’s ‘individual’ style of investigation. Complaints from their neighbours about Alex’s somewhat unique interpretation of the white lines separating the parking spaces in front of their building. Half-way through his meal and he was beginning to get worried. ‘Um Walter…’ ‘Fox.’ Walter replied, with a calmness he didn’t feel. ‘You know we talked about…um…our…you know…favorite…uh…fantasies.’ ‘Yes.’ Walter said, feeling his neck muscles tightening. ‘We thought…as there’s the whole weekend and we don’t have to do anything, you’d do it for us.’ Alex finished, almost in one breath. ‘No.’ Walter said flatly, hoping to end the conversation immediately. ‘But we said we’d do your thing.’ Fox reminded Walter. ‘And I told you, it wouldn’t be the same. Neither of you are…military enough. That’s why they’re called fantasies. Because they never become reality. And we only discussed them because we’d had rather a lot to drink that evening. I also remember us agreeing that, having discussed them, we wouldn’t mention them again.’ ‘It’d just be for the weekend.’ Alex protested. ‘No Alex. Fox, you know I love you both. But not in that way. I won’t do it. We’ve had this conversation before and I haven’t changed my mind. I don’t feel comfortable treating you as anything other than the intelligent and loving adults you are.’ Fox and Alex exchanged an ‘at least we tried’ look. ‘Okay.’ Alex muttered disappointedly. Relieved, Walter continued with his meal. Neither Alex nor Fox, he noticed, ate much more of theirs. Or made more than minimal conversation. ************* Finishing first, Walter got up. ‘I’ll do the dishes as you cooked. When you’ve finished, you can put the TV on. I’ll be in to watch it when I’m done.’ After a short while, Walter’s voice came from the kitchen. ‘Fox, take out the garbage please.’ Enjoying the sci-fi film he’d found just starting, Fox called: ‘In a minute.’ Walter appeared in the doorway suddenly, startling both Fox and Alex, who was laying with his head in Fox’s lap. ‘No, now Fox.’ ‘But Walter…’ Tired, Walter’s patience snapped. ‘Okay, that’s it, I’ve had enough. You know you both have chores to do and every time I have to remind you to do them. When you do get round to them you’re careless and sloppy. And if I make a comment on how poorly you’ve done, you get grouchy.’ Alex half-opened his eyes. ‘Sloppy and Grouchy. Two of the *bad* seven dwarfs.’ Fox and Alex both giggled at Alex’s comment. Then they looked at Walter. And their smiles faded instantly. Walter said sharply: ‘You can finish the dishes between you. I’m going to have a bath.’ ************** The following day… Walter picked up his keys from the coffee table. ‘I’m going out for a while. To keep you out of mischief, let’s find you something to occupy the time until I return. Get your legal pads and pens please.’ He heard quickly-stifled groans from both men at the certain knowledge that an essay was looming. He shrugged mentally. It would be a shame to disappoint them. ************ Pulling on his coat, Walter turned to leave. ‘Three thousand words on that topic before I return or there will be unpleasant consequences. You may use the internet. You may not use the internet for anything other than research directly connected with your essays. If your essays are in any way similar, you will do them again. After I punish you. Get started.’ ************** Hearing the key in the door, Fox and Alex looked up. ‘Stay in the den both of you.’ Walter called. Fox and Alex exchanged a look. ‘Wonder what’s going on?’ Alex asked nervously. ‘Walter’s probably bought us something to say sorry for being mean to us yesterday.’ Alex brightened at Fox’s explanation. ‘Okay.’ Walter came downstairs a while later and walked into the den. ‘Are you both finished?’ Two heads nodded. Walter picked up the heap of hand written sheets and looked carefully through them, relieved to find they were completely different. ‘So, do you realise how lucky you are you don’t have to do your chores without vacuum cleaners or rubber gloves?’ ‘Yes Walter.’ They both said in unison. Even using the internet to help them, their essays on ‘Changes in household management down the ages’ had taken them the whole two hours Walter had been away. ‘Right. Alex, get outside now, and clean the cars. Fox, out in the garden and start raking the leaves. I’ll call you in for lunch.’ ************ Alone, and with the door behind him locked closed, Walter looked at the pile of variously-sized boxes at his feet. Picking one at random, he used his penknife to cut through the tape holding the end closed. Walter stared at the instructions. They had, of course, been in the very last box he had opened, and his relief at finding them faded instantly when he realised that, although there appeared to be instructions in every language in the known world, and a few from elsewhere, on none of the sheets was there an English-language version. Sighing, he turned back to the first page, thankful his knowledge of DIY was fairly good, and looked at the diagram. ‘That fits in there with that screw…’ Guessing he was almost half-way done, Walter got to his feet and walked to the front window. He saw the half-washed, still foam-covered cars and frowned. Crossing the room, he looked out of the window into the garden and saw a less-than half raked lawn. And Fox and Alex having a ‘heaps of damp grass versus wet soapy sponges’ fight. Opening the window, he leaned out. ‘Having fun, you two?’ Instantly, Fox and Alex froze. They both looked up at the window and Alex fled the garden in the same instant Fox snatched up the rake. Satisfied, Walter closed the window and returned to the seemingly endless heap of boxes. ************* When he finally got the thing assembled, it was almost two. He had been at it for five hours. He was disappointed that he hadn’t the energy to stain the pine frame, but as he stood back, he allowed himself a self-satisfied smile. Quietly, he said: ‘I don’t think they’ll mind that the pine isn’t stained.’ Locking the door behind him, he went down to the kitchen and began to prepare sandwiches for all three of them. ************ Afternoon… Fox went to the bathroom and saw that the door to the spare room was closed. That was unusual. He walked across and turned the door handle. It was locked. That was a first. He smiled as he walked across to the bathroom. Obviously Walter had hidden their surprise in there. *********** Evening… Walter looked up from his book. ‘Right, both of you go upstairs. Get showered, and call me when you’re done.’ Fox and Alex stripped quickly, washed their hair hurriedly, showered even faster and towelled themselves semi-dry before pulling on their robes and, exchanging an excited grin of anticipation, both tried to get through the bathroom door at the same time. ************* A handful of pages later, Walter heard Fox calling him and climbed the stairs, almost smiling at the sight of the two younger men in their bathrobes, hair still shiny, clearly excited at the idea that they were finally going to find out what Walter had locked away. Walter unlocked the door to the spare room and stood aside to let them walk in. There was a long moment of stunned silence as the two younger men took in the ‘surprise’. ‘This is it?’ Fox asked. ‘This is our surprise?’ Alex didn’t know what to make of the bunk bed. ‘Surprise? I don’t recall saying anything about a surprise.’ Walter said blandly. Alex shot Fox an angry look and Walter bit his lip to stop himself smiling at the cross look on Alex’s face and the disappointed expression Fox wore. Almost immediately, Fox said: ‘I want the top bunk.’ ‘No, I want it.’ Alex snapped. Walter slammed his hand onto the pine frame and there was instant silence. ‘Quiet, both of you! I had a feeling you’d fight over this. So we’ll toss a coin. Who wants to call?’ There was silence and Walter looked from Alex to Fox. ‘Alex, heads. Fox, tails.’ ‘Fox tails.’ Alex giggled, starting Fox off again. ‘Enough!’ Walter thundered. He threw the coin up and caught it, trapping it between his palms. ‘Tails. Fox, you get to go on top.’ The comment started another round of sniggers and Walter sighed heavily. ‘Five minutes each in the bathroom, then I want you in bed.’ ‘It’s nine o’clock Walter.’ Fox whined plaintively. ‘Alex, bathroom. Now.’ As Alex walked past him, he saw Walter checking his watch. Alex had left his own watch in the kitchen after doing the dishes, and had no idea how long he was. He hoped fervently that cleaning his teeth and emptying his bladder hadn’t taken more than the time Walter had allowed. He walked quickly back into the room and stood next to Fox. ‘Off you go Fox. Alex, get into bed.’ Alex climbed under the Barney sheets and laid his head against the big purple creature’s beaming smile. ‘You do not move from this bed under any circumstances until I wake you tomorrow morning, understand?’ ‘Yes Walter.’ Alex whispered meekly. ‘Um…what if…’ ‘If you need to use the bathroom?’ Walter said, guessing what Alex had been about to ask. ‘I’ve already thought of that.’ He handed Alex a translucent plastic hospital-type ‘bottle’. Alex took it and quickly stowed it under the bed. Fox came back just as Walter was checking his watch. ‘Four minutes forty seconds Fox. What were you doing in there?’ Fox blushed and stared at the floor. ‘Get into bed.’ Fox climbed up the ladder and settled under the Teletubbies bedclothes. As he lay down, he realised the problem. The beds, made for children, were several inches shorter than a normal adult bed. Only by curling into an almost foetal position could he lay flat. And then, with the child-sized bedclothes, he could only cover himself to his thighs. To make things worse, if they could be worse, the mattress was clearly meant for a child. His weight pushed the thing so thin that he could feel every wooden slat under him. He opened his mouth to complain, realised Walter had climbed up after him and they were practically nose-to-nose. ‘Settle down Fox. Here.’ Fox’s look of horror as Walter handed him the plastic bottle left Walter with an almost uncontrollable urge to laugh. But he forced a neutral expression on his face and nodded, satisfied Fox and Alex would have learned their lesson by the morning. ‘No getting out of bed. For any reason.’ There was a small shelf built onto the frame of the bunk, midway between Alex and Fox’s mattresses. Walter pulled a baby intercom from his pocket, switched it on and sat it on the ledge. ‘And no talking.’ Fox’s eyes filled with tears at what he perceived to be a massive over-reaction to their failure. ‘Walter, we’ll miss the ga…’ ‘You have the Teletubbies Fox. What more could you want?’ Fox scowled. ‘Them all to be like Dipsey?’ He pointed to one of the ‘things’ on his duvet. Walter looked at Fox with a worried frown. ‘I do *not* want to know either how you know the names of the Teletubbies or when you started imagining a world filled with overweight green creatures with spikes on their heads.’ ‘Oh that one.’ Alex’s voice drifted up from the bottom bunk. ‘Um, Walter that’s not a spike, it’s a…’ Walter leaned down, his face close to Alex’s. ‘I don’t care if it’s a antennae to pick up radio signals from outer space. Lay down, be quiet and go to sleep.’ Walter climbed down and, unseen by either Fox or Alex, flicked a switch on a small box hanging from a short wire at the end of Fox’s mattress. With a final look back at the two younger men, he shook his head as he closed the door. A couple of minutes later, the sound of the football game came through the door, making both Fox and Alex groan silently. *************** Alex lay awake staring at the underside of Fox’s mattress for several minutes, picturing the outline of Fox’s naked butt which was only inches away. The mental picture was made more vivid by the unfamiliar sensation of the new, unwashed and unsoftened, bedclothes rubbing on his bare skin. ‘Fox, you awake?’ He whispered. ‘It’s nine o’clock Alex. Of course I am.’ Fox hissed testily. ‘There’s a TV on the chest of drawers. If we keep the sound off, we can watch the game on it.’ ‘Walter told us…’ Fox started. ‘He won’t know.’ Alex said bravely. ‘Okay. Go on then.’ ‘No, you do it. You’re quieter than I am.’ Listening to the exchange in the bedroom across the hallway, Walter had to work hard not to laugh out loud. The idea that Fox would make less noise than Alex doing something like this was, he thought, just stupid. As he thought about it, and realised Fox would inevitably get caught, he began to wonder if Alex hadn’t been smarter than he first appeared. Fox climbed slowly out of bed, careful to make as little noise as possible. He walked over to the small TV set in the corner of the room and jumped, startled, as a loud buzzing filled the room. ‘Make it stop!’ Alex hissed urgently from his bed. ‘I can’t.’ Fox snapped, desperately searching for the source of the noise. Then the door opened. Walter’s bulk, back-lit by the light from his bedroom gave him a menacing appearance and Fox backed against the bed. He was too scared to notice that Walter held a large bottle of water. Calmly, Walter said: ‘Fox, when I said ‘stay in bed’, what did you think I meant?’ Fox scrambled back into his bed, relieved that, somehow, the buzzing stopped. ‘You both also seem to have misunderstood the ‘no talking’ instruction.’ He held up the intercom unit and stared at each younger man in turn. Fox and Alex both curled up in their beds, the movement of the quilts which they lay under showing they were both shaking. Walter sighed heavily. ‘It seems I was right. You obviously can’t be trusted to behave. The noise was an infra-red alarm I set up to trigger if either of you got out of bed. I wasn’t expecting it to go off at all, but particularly not ten minutes after I leave you alone.’ Fox and Alex both swallowed hard. ‘We’re sorry.’ Fox offered. ‘I’m assuming you wanted a drink Fox. Here. Leave half for Alex.’ Walter handed Fox the bottle. ‘Um, Walter, I’m not thirsty…’ Walter smiled benignly. ‘Drink it Fox. Now.’ Slowly, hating the full feeling in his stomach, Fox emptied half the bottle. Walter took it from him and handed it to Alex. ‘Finish it Alex. All of it.’ Deciding he was in enough trouble without adding to it over a drink he didn’t want, Alex swallowed the remaining water. Taking the empty bottle from Alex, Walter said menacingly: ‘Set the alarm off again, you’ll both spend the night on the balcony. Fox, I’m sure Alex will tell you it’s not a pleasant experience.’ *************** ‘I can’t sleep.’ Fox groused, trying to distract himself from the increasing pressure in his bladder. ‘Me either.’ Alex whinged, feeling exactly the same discomfort. ‘Wanna play the alphabet game?’ Alex giggled softly. ‘The adult version? Sure.’ ‘Ass.’ ‘Butt.’ ‘Can’t have that. It’s the same as my ‘A’. ‘ Fox interrupted. ‘Okay…um…Bottom.’ ‘That’s the same thing!’ Fox complained, a little too loudly. ‘No, Bottom as in the opposite of Top. Who the Hell let you go to Oxford? And shut up or Walter’ll hear us.’ Scowling, Fox said quickly: ‘Condom.’ ‘Discipline.’ Alex said without having to think too hard. Both men were startled when Walter’s loud voice interrupted them, his angry tone coming clearly through the small speaker. ‘Stop talking and go to sleep or I’ll haul you both into the bathroom, bend you over the bath and demonstrate what ‘E’ stands for.’ *********** Less than ten minutes later, Fox groaned. As quietly as he could, he said: ‘I need to use the bathroom.’ Alex lifted himself up onto his elbow. ‘Me too. But we can’t. Use the bottle.’ ‘I can’t. It’s…’ Fox sat up, staring balefully at the plastic bottle at his side. ‘Horrible. I think that’s the idea.’ Alex said resignedly, uncapping the lid. The sound of Alex relieving himself left Fox squirming, and after only a few seconds, a look of disgust on his face, he too popped the lid of his bottle and began to fill it. ‘What do I do with it?’ ‘Give it to me. I’ll put it under the bed.’ Fox handed the bottle down and Alex tucked them both under the bed, trying not to think about what he was laying only inches from. It was like a lot of things, he thought. Your own was okay, but someone else’s…that was different. He’d been near in some pretty disgusting things in his time, but…well, it made him squirm. And he really couldn’t get to sleep. ‘Is Walter really angry with us?’ Alex asked, not sure he really wanted to know the answer, but wide awake. Listening to Alex’s question, Walter waited for Fox’s reply. He was tempted to go into their room to reassure Alex immediately, but he wanted to hear what Fox would say. ‘Nah. He’s just doing this to make a point. He’ll be okay in the morning.’ ‘Are you sure?’ Alex persisted. ‘He was really mad earlier.’ ‘Yeah, that’s just Walter.’ Fox whispered reassuringly. ‘I bet he’ll make us breakfast.’ ‘He says we make too much mess in the kitchen when we do it.’ ‘That’s just an excuse. He likes to cook for us. Same reason he took most of the day to make this bed. Cos he loves us.’ ‘Okay.’ Alex seemed reassured by Fox’s responses and settled back down. In the room opposite, Walter smiled at the conversation he had just overheard and sat up, flicking the TV remote. Aware that the sound from the other bedroom had stopped, Fox looked at the luminous dial on his watch. ‘It’s almost eleven. The game’s over.’ ‘Yeah. We may as well go to sleep.’ Fox sighed loudly. ‘S’pose so.’ As they both tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable in the narrow, short beds, the door opened a second time. Walter walked over to the beds, flicked the alarm switch off and said lightly: ‘Had enough of being treated like kids? Not as much fun as you thought it would be, huh?’ Two heads shook desperately. ‘I told you I wasn’t comfortable treating you like kids and you deliberately manipulated me in doing exactly that.’ Two very guilty pairs of eyes looked back at him. ‘Actually, you didn’t. I am, whatever you may think, perfectly capable of working out when you two are up to something. So I decided to treat you like kids, but not let you have any fun. Maybe next time you won’t be so quick to try and get your own way?’ Two bottom lips began to quiver at the same time as two pairs of eyes filled with remorseful tears. ‘It was our fantasy. And you ruined it.’ Fox said haltingly. ‘No Fox. You are right in one respect. It was your fantasy. But I didn’t ruin it. You were duplicitous and sneaky. You ruined it for yourselves.’ ‘You could have done at least one nice thing.’ Alex offered tentatively. ‘And encourage your obvious belief that it’s okay to deceive people to get what you want? No.’ Unmoved by the devastated expressions on his lover’s faces, Walter said briskly: ‘Very well. You have one last decision to make. Do you want me to punish you now or in the morning?’ ‘Punish us? I thought this was our…’ Fox stopped talking as he looked across at Walter’s implacable expression. ‘I want to get it over with.’ Alex said firmly. ‘I guess so.’ Fox muttered. ‘Up you come then Alex.’ Walter jerked his head at the top bunk. Reluctantly, Alex climbed the few steps, waiting until Fox was facing the wall, knees bent under him, before duplicating his position. Both balanced precariously on the narrow mattress, each hoping that their combined weight wouldn’t prove too much for the wooden frame. They had no idea Walter had read in the assembly instructions that the top bunk could safely take a weight of six hundred pounds. Even if he climbed up there with them, he knew they would still all be safe. ‘What is this spanking for? Alex?’ ‘For not doing the chores properly.’ ‘Yes. And? Fox?’ ‘For thinking we were smarter than you.’ Walter let the pathetic attempt at flattery pass. ‘Now, keep still or you’ll fall off.’ Walter delivered the twelve spanks to each of them, six to each trembling buttock. Fox yowled with each impact, Alex managing to hang on until the tenth smack had turned his normally pale flesh bright red before the first sob escaped. Walter noticed almost immediately he began their punishment that Fox and Alex sought each other’s hands, their white knuckles testament to the strength of their grip. Walter left them for a few moments to gather themselves, then said gently: ‘We’ll put this behind us now. You broke our rules, and you’ve been punished for it.’ He gestured at the bed. ‘I’m leaving this up, and if you skimp on the chores again, you’ll be back in here. Alex, climb down carefully.’ He put a supporting hand out to help Alex whose legs were unexpectedly wobbly. ‘Fox, come on.’ Fox was equally unsteady, and grateful for Walter’s proximity as he negotiated the four steps. Alex suddenly remembered. ‘Um, Walter…we…um…used…the bottle things.’ Walter appeared unfazed. It wasn’t a huge surprise. ‘Very well. Bring them and empty them.’ Alex leaned down and pulled out one of the bottles, waiting until Fox had done the same. ‘How do we know which is which?’ Crossly, Walter said: ‘It doesn’t matter. Just take them into the bathroom and empty them. Wash them out and leave them on top of the cabinet with the lids open.’ ‘We’re keeping them?’ Fox asked, horrified at the implication. Walter nodded. ‘Yes. Now hurry up.’ He sighed tiredly as the discussion as to whether each had their own bottle continued until Fox and Alex re-appeared in the hallway and saw Walter’s look of disapproval. ‘Bed. Now. Go.’ Alex and Fox almost ran into the main bedroom. ************** Lying face down either side of Walter who was already almost asleep, Fox whispered: ‘I’ll wash the cars if you take out the garbage.’ Sleepily, Alex muttered: ‘Deal.’ ‘Both of you shut up and lay still or you’ll go back in the spare room.’ Walter threatened. After that, the room was quiet until the morning except for the occasional sounds Fox and Alex made as they slept and Walter’s gentle groans as he lived out his fantasy in the safety of his dreams. End Home Return to the X-Files Fic Index Return to the West Wing Fic Index