Category: Angst. Lots and lots of angst.

Rating: PG and a little R at the end

Characters: Gibbs/DiNozzo mainly

Series: No

Spoilers: None intended but anything might get a mention

Summary: The past influences the present. And Gibbs misses it until the last moment.

Archive: Just tell me where it's going

Additional `stuff': My first fic based around NCIS. Apparently, that could be a Medic Alert bracelet around Gibbs' wrist.

Title: Tough love Part Two

His urgent bathroom need apparently satisfied, Tony walked into the living room, eyes sweeping the décor and furniture. Pale, neutral colors and functional furniture. Exactly what he would have guessed for Gibbs. `Thanks. Sorry.'

Gibbs shrugged. `Okay. Ready to go?'

`I can get a cab.' Tony offered.

`Get. In. The. Car.' Gibbs instructed.

`Gloomy Gus.' Tony muttered under his breath.

`Call me that again and I'll put you back in the sewer.' Gibbs warned.

`How come you can hear a whisper at ten feet but you can't hear Kate being mean to me at six inches?' Tony asked rhetorically, picking up his jacket from the couch.

Taking a deep breath, Gibbs walked out to the car and climbed in.

Gibbs drove out to Tony's apartment, more relieved than concerned at how quiet Tony was during the journey. A couple of times he looked over but Tony was staring out of the window, apparently lost in his own thoughts. `What?' He asked finally.

Tony looked across. `Thought I was gonna die. Down there. Thought we both were.'

Gibbs frowned. `I told you I'd find you.'

`When?' `When you called from the parking lot.'

`I don't remember…I came outside and…I fell down.'

Gibbs sighed and pulled into a space on the street outside Tony's apartment building. Uncomfortable at the memory of his panic at Tony's slurred call, Gibbs said firmly: `Goodnight Tony.'

`Night boss. Thanks for the pizza.' Tony smiled.

Gibbs nodded curtly. `Get some sleep. See you Monday.'

Tony climbed out and Gibbs watched him go. Halfway down the path Tony turned, realizing Gibbs hadn't pulled away. He smiled, waved, turned back and continued inside.

Monday morning…

Kate smiled to herself. Things were definitely back to normal. McGee was tapping away at his keyboard, and she had already heard from Abbey that Gerald was recovering well, much to everyone's relief. A few feet away, Gibbs was reaming Tony out about some paperwork he had left half-completed, ignoring Tony's whining about Gibbs obsessive need for perfection when Gibbs made a comment she couldn't hear. A moment later, Tony slammed the file on the desk and walked out.

Her smiled faded instantly and she caught McGee's nervous look. He wasn't used to the relationship her boss and her colleague had, and he was scared at the sudden anger in the room. Frowning, she turned her attention to a file on her desk, unwilling to make eye contact with Gibbs. She didn't have to keep up the pretence long. Gibbs took a few shuddering breaths then followed Tony out, eyes fixed on the doorway.

Gibbs met Ducky coming up the corridor he was walking down, trying to find Dinozzo before he did something stupid. `What did you say to him?' Ducky frowned. `I've never seen…'

`Where is he?' Gibbs snapped.

`Hiding from you by the sound of it Jethro.' Ducky's tone softened. `He's been through a lot these past…'

Gibbs scowled and snarled. `And I haven't?'

Ducky smiled sympathetically. `He's in my office. I'm going to be quite a while.' He tapped the pile of file folders he held. `At least an hour or so.'

Gibbs relaxed a fraction and half-smiled despite his remaining anger. `Won't take me that long to kill him.'

Ducky's expression was unreadable. `No…I don't imagine it will.' He walked away leaving Gibbs to continue on to the morgue.

Gibbs pushed the button and the doors slid open. He could see Tony pacing around the office on the far side of the room and watched him for a few seconds but the pacing didn't slow and he strode across the tiled floor, opened the door and stood in the doorway. Before Tony even sensed his presence, Gibbs said firmly: `You're about two minutes from being fired.'

Carefully he closed the door behind him and the sound seemed to catch Tony's attention. He stopped, turned, eyes fixed on Gibbs. `That long?'

Gibbs watched Tony carefully for some indication he was joking, but saw nothing in the angry eyes but hurt and pain. `Dinozzo…whatever happened…I'll get someone to talk to you…one of our people, someone from ATVA.'

Tony's chest heaved as his eyes locked on Gibbs. `You felt sorry for me. You bought me pizza cos you felt sorry for me. Thanks.'

Gibbs frowned. `No Tony…you invited me, remember?'

Tony swallowed and looked away. `No…I don't…I…it's…hard to…I can't…'

Gibbs crossed the floor, cursing inwardly. Dammit. Tony needed help not pizza. You missed the signs. Dammit!!

Tony looked up and smiled tiredly. `I'll be okay. Is my two minutes up yet?'

Gibbs nodded. `Yeah. Tony…talk to me…something happened down there.'

Tony shook his head, clearing what Gibbs thought were memories of being in a cell with a rotting corpse and a dying man.

There was almost silence in the room, the only sounds the twin sounds of the two men breathing. Then: `He never said it. Mom did. Dad's proud of you. It wasn't the same. And then…that night.'

Gibbs stood silent and still, listening.

`A cop bought me home. A group of us…I was fifteen! I didn't know…I swear! It was a game…we didn't know…and…he hit me.' Tony sat upright, taking a deep breath, and Gibbs sensed Tony didn't even realize he was in the room with him. `You'll never amount to anything. You'll end up in the gutter.' Tony shivered at the memory, and his face paled even whiter. `My lip bled and my Mom gave me some ice. He'd never hit any of us before. He never hit me again.'

Gibbs felt his heart constrict. His own parents had been firm with him and his brothers. But never, ever, had either of them said or done anything so cruel. He took a few steps forward. `Tony…'

Tony's head shook wildly and he shouted: `And you bought me pizza! Why didn't you just hit me too? I screwed up!'

Gibbs relaxed his shoulders, feeling the painful tension ease a fraction. His voice was deliberately soft. He knew enough about hostage negotiation to know that if Tony had to strain to hear, he would have to concentrate on the words, nothing else. `Tony…I *am* proud of you. Yeah, you screwed up. But you're still here. We're *all* still here. That's what counts.'

Tony's head raised slowly, as if the movement required considerable effort. His own voice a whisper, he managed: `I'm sorry.'

Gibbs smiled, reached out and hugged Tony. He felt the younger man's head on his shoulder and overcame his feelings of awkwardness at the intimacy of their closeness to hold Tony until he felt him move in his arms.

Softly Tony muttered: `I'm okay now.' He sat up and half-smiled, nodding down at Gibbs' shoulder, the pale fabric dark with moisture. `Sorry.'

Gibbs shrugged. `Forget it.'

Tony's eyes narrowed. `You're not a hugger are you?'

Gibbs chuckled. `You're just working that out now?'

Tony laughed and Gibbs opened the door. He stood in the doorway, blocking Tony's exit. `Why Ducky?'

`Gerald.'

The one word was all Gibbs needed. He understood. Ducky and Gerald's relationship was a closely-guarded secret. If Ducky or Gerald had told Tony, it stood to reason that the one person Tony would trust to understand his confusion and feelings was Ducky. He nodded and held the door open, waiting for Tony to pass him.

Continued in Part Three… Tough Love Part Three...click here

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