Category: West Wing hurt/comfort/slashfic
Rating: NC-17 definitely overall!
Characters: Leo and John mainly but everyone's around
Series: Yes Part One
Spoilers: Anything but especially ITSOTG (Pts1 and 2)
Summary: How do you tell someone you care without saying anything?
Archive: Just tell me where it's going
Additional `stuff': Some mentions of actual scenes/dialogue from the
series. I didn't write them. Hoynes POV throughout. I sort of fiddled
a tiny bit with canon… There's some bad language. It's bleeped out of
course.
Warning : This fic concerns a relationship between Leo and John. And
assumes Leo had a relationship with Jed. Which is over. But still
makes John jealous. And hints at a relationship between Sam and Josh.
DO NOT READ ON IF THAT SQUICKS YOU!!!!!


Title: Show not tell – Part One

One minute I was joking around with a group of women, the next I was
being bundled into a car. I managed to get the agent beside me to
explain that the President had been shot. `Anyone else?'
`We're not sure yet Mr Vice-President.'

***********

`Leo?'
`Mr Vice-President?'
I sometimes forget we're being observed. That our calls are being
listened in to. Leo doesn't. Ever.
`Yeah. You okay?'
`Yeah.'
`How's he doing?'
`He's gonna be okay. We're waiting on Josh.'
`You staying over there?'
`Nah. It's gonna be twelve hours, maybe more. I'm gonna head back
over.'
Not home. He said `back over'. Which means he'll be back here soon.
It's almost midnight. I'm gonna start not looking at my watch.

************

Some people call Leo the most powerful man in Washington. Actually, a
lot of people. But not to his face. Or Jed's. He probably is. At
least he's up there amongst the contenders.

Since his divorce, even since news of his separation became public
knowledge, some people have made it their goal in life to bed Leo
McGarry. The attraction of all that power. Being the man with the ear
of the President. As far as I know, I'm the only one to succeed.
Apart from Jed of course.

I heard because agents gossip like anyone else. That Jed kissed Leo
before he went into surgery. What the heck, Hardy kissed Nelson,
right? Yeah, only those two hadn't been sleeping together since…well,
a long time. It's not like I can just ask. Hey Leo, when exactly did
you and Jed stop sleeping together? Mainly cos I don't wanna make him
lie. And he would. If he had to.

It's always bothered me. Did their wives know? Is that the real
reason why Jen and Leo split up? And if she knows, why did Abbey not
leave too? I would have. If my wife had been sleeping with our best
friend. Man or woman. I wouldn't care. I'd leave. I guess the agents
knew. And know about Leo and me.

We stopped making it look like he'd spent the night on my couch a
while back. It was stupid. Leo wanted to keep doing it. I didn't. We
argued. Leo gave in. Which was a first. Leo's so used to people doing
exactly what he says, I think the shock of me disagreeing with him
threw him for a while. He still brings stuff over. For us to look at.
But the folders are the only things that end up spending the night on
the couch. They always were. Only now it's obvious.

************

I felt for Nancy. She gave me the facts. And her interpretation of
them. Without Leo in the room, she would have convinced me. But he
was there. And she didn't stand a chance. Only she didn't know I was
gonna listen to Leo whatever she said. So when they all looked at me,
waiting for my decision, it was easy to say that I agreed with Leo.
Because he was right. He would never deliberately mislead me. Not
that I'm saying Nancy would. But Leo knew what to do. Nancy would
have advised. Leo told me what to do. Without making it look like he
had. I know he believed what he said. Which was good enough for me.

*************

He wanted to be with Jed. With Josh. With anyone but the Cabinet and
the Leadership. But at three am, he was in the Roosevelt Room with
just about anyone with any political influence in DC.

I was there too. But I might just as well not have been. Leo's been
in politics forever. Times of national crisis, war, economic and
social unrest. He just…managed. People, situations, solutions. It was
so easy just to let him speak. I nodded a few times, even contributed
now and then. But, basically, Leo was in charge. Which was fine by
me. I was still coming to terms with how close I'd come to being
President.

Three years ago, I nearly did. But then I came up against Leo. Who
took Josh. And I was gonna lose from the moment they talked. Only I
didn't know it. Cos Leo didn't tell me `til much later on. That he
knew the only way to get Bartlet the nomination was to take from my
team the one person he knew would stand in his way.

No one ever accused Leo of being afraid of getting what he wanted. By
whatever means. I hated him for a while. We barely spoke and when we
got out of meetings we couldn't wait to go our separate ways. And
then one night… What can I say? I was tired. Not as tired as I am
now, but tired enough not to notice the signals. And realise they
were being directed at me. Bored with subtlety, the McGarry sarcasm
hit me full force. `John, you want me to send you a memo?'
`What…Leo…are you serious?'
`Yuh.'
`Okay.' There wasn't anything else I could have said. Except maybe
something about being in a room surrounded by secret service
personnel and about ten feet from the Oval Office. And how discussing…
what we were discussing was not a great idea. Leo didn't care.
Correction, Leo *looked* like he didn't care. Like now. He *looks*
like he's not worried sick about Jed or Josh or being invaded by a
very pissed-off Iraq. Better hope the King of Jordan is persuasive.

The adrenaline of a couple of hours earlier had been replaced with
tiredness and I was beginning to feel it. Leo was still going strong.
For a guy his age, with his background, he's incredible. Almost four
am. Probably he's been awake for around twenty-four hours. And he
looks only a little tired. And only if you know the signs.

Everyone - senior staff, secret service agents, just about anyone who
isn't sure what to do - continually interrupts us, checking with Leo.
And he deals with every one quietly and calmly, making sure they're
happy before sending them away.

I've seen flashes of the McGarry temper and it's not something I
deliberately invite but it's carefully under control right now. With
Jed and Josh hurt, I'm guessing all he wants to do is scream and
shout and pound the walls. Instead he's standing or sitting,
listening, contributing, his calmness keeping everyone controlled.

Margaret's around. In the background as usual. Discreetly seeing to
it that Leo isn't bothered more than necessary. Keeping his coffee
topped up. Bringing him updates on Jed and Josh and how the hunt for
the guy Gina says she saw on the ground is going. Generally acting as
a cross between a shoulder to cry on and a buffer between Leo and the
outside world. I'm guessing she hasn't slept either. She has cried. I
can see her eyes are still red-rimmed. Leo hasn't. Just one more
thing he doesn't have time for.

`What's next?'
I'm not sure if that's a phrase Leo picked up from Jed or the other
way round. Either way, they both use it. Let's move on. I'm bored
with this topic. Sometimes just to stop a conversation they're not
enjoying. And this time Leo wants to get back to the hospital. Unless
the people around him can find a really good excuse to keep him in
the room, he's leaving. A moment later, looking around the silent
room, he gets up and walks out.

**************
`Leo.'
`Mr Vice-President?'
`D'you have a minute?'
`Sure.'
I follow him into his office. As soon as the door closes, he drops
into his favorite armchair. `He could've died tonight John.'
`Yeah.'
There are tears in Leo's eyes, and I'm guessing he's talking about
Jed. Because Josh still could. I mean, he's critical. `C'mere.'
He shakes his head slowly. `John…' He's out in the corridor before I
can stop him.

`Sam.'
`Leo.'
`You heading back to GW?'
`Nah. I'm gonna let Toby snap at me for a few hours.'
Leo nods. It's the sensible thing to do. The staff can't actually
*do* anything for Josh, except worry. And I know Donna and Mrs L are
over there. From the look on his face, Sam's about to lose it. Leo
turns back to me.
`Mr Vice-President, you wanna wait in my office? Margaret'll get you
some coffee.'
`Okay.'
Leo hugs Sam. Who is crying now. I'm guessing the tears are not for
the President. Well, not completely anyway. So those rumours are true
too. Sam and Josh. Is anyone in this building in a straight
relationship? Toby, I guess. Or he would be if he could just get
himself over to her office and ask his ex-wife out. CJ? She and Danny
seem close. But it's not a good idea. I'm sure she knows that.

*************

He's exhausted and whereas I'm in my shirtsleeves, he's still got his
jacket and tie on. I mean, like anyone's gonna care. Danny's off on
the hunt for who was in charge the last few hours. That would be Leo.
Whether anyone admits it or not, it's true. It certainly wasn't me. I
didn't have the letter. Leo didn't care. The country needed someone
to take charge. And in the middle of the night, with his best friend
and his Deputy both bleeding, he did just that. F--- `em. I don't
care. And no one in this building's likely to let on. So it'll be
just another piece of history which gets shoved in the bottom drawer.

He's almost asleep. If he doesn't get some coffee soon, he's gonna be
out of it. `Leo? Leo come on. Walk around while I find some fresh
coffee.'
He frowns at me. `The people that did this better pray I never meet
any of `em.'
I smile. He's awake again. Somehow, by sheer force of will, he's
woken up. But he'll still need coffee. I'll find Margaret.

End

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