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Disclaimer: The characters from the show aren’t mine, they belong to others. No copyright infringement intended. Again, if someone’s used the name(s) or storyline(s) elsewhere, the same applies. Any characters you don’t recognise are mine. Feedback would be nice, positive feedback would be nicer. Enjoy! Category: X-Files angsty PWP Rating: R or below Characters: M/Sk/K Series: No Spoilers: None Summary: Watching too much TV can be hazardous to your bank balance. And your relationship. Archive: Just tell me where it’s going Additional ‘stuff’: This isn’t about what you think it is about. The title is misleading. Kinda. The chairs really do exist. A few pointers: Walter, Fox and Alex live together. John and Dana do too. The Friends ep where Joey buys the chairs is one of my many favorite eps of the show. |
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Walter watched impassively as the three chairs were delivered and Fox signed for them. He stood unmoving as Fox and Alex excitedly tore the plastic wrapping off and jumped into the black leather armchairs. ‘Walter?’ Fox’s note of anxiety forced Walter into movement, both of expression and body. He smiled and copied their action, only with a little less haste, lowering himself into the deeply-upholstered seat, leaning back against the head-rest. ‘Wow!’ Both Fox and Alex, Walter noticed, had blissful expressions on their faces. He could see their closed eyes, slight smiles and hear the sound of deep breaths being exhaled. ‘Layzeee boyyyy.’ Alex said wondrously. ‘What?’ ‘Oh Walter! You remember that ep of Friends where Joey and Chandler…’ The remainder of the sentence was lost on Walter. Although he regularly had to sit through re-runs and videotaped episodes of the TV series, he thought it unrealistic and he paid only sufficient attention that, if the following day, Alex or Fox quoted a line from it he wasn’t completely lost. ‘Sure Alex.’ Walter said placatingly. Fox got up, reluctance evidence in the speed of his rising, or lack thereof. ‘It’s got a space for food, and a chilled box for beer. And the feet lift up.’ Walter nodded. ‘And three of these cost..?’ Fox looked away and Walter noticed Alex was suddenly almost hidden in the chair’s bulk. ‘Sometimes Walter, you have to look beyond the cost of something to…’ Fox stopped in mid-sentence. Walter’s raised eyebrows seemed to suggest finishing that particular sentence would simply be a waste of oxygen. ‘Guys, I don’t mind you buying things. Hell, Fox, you’ve got enough money to buy a small country. And I don’t even want to think how many secret accounts your money is stashed in Alex. But buying things like furniture should be a joint decision.’ At the same moment Fox’s pout appeared, Alex lifted his head so it rested on his arm, his eyes bright with tears. ‘We thought you’d be pleased.’ He said in a small voice. ‘I am pleased. It’s a really nice surprise. And I’m sure it’ll be really handy not having to get up to get a beer. I’m just saying I wish we could have talked about this.’ The atmosphere for the rest of the evening was subdued, and, not long after nine, Alex got up. ‘I’m gonna have a bath. Night.’ Walter looked up from his book. ‘Alex, are you feeling all right?’ Alex nodded listlessly. ‘Yeah.’ Fox closed the TV guide. ‘I’m gonna head up too. It’s been a long week.’ Walter was concerned all over again. ‘Fox, it’s only just after nine. Are you sure?’ Fox nodded, not meeting Walter’s concerned gaze. Alone, Walter picked up the phone, hesitated for a moment, then dialled. ‘Hello?’ ‘Hi Dana. It’s Walter. Is John there?’ ‘He’s fixing something on the car. Hang on…’ Suddenly Walter felt stupid. ‘Look, don’t disturb him. It’s okay…’ Dana wasn’t fooled. Apart from monthly get-togethers, she rarely heard from Walter, Fox or Alex unless there was a problem. The three men had realised very early on that both John and Dana, as objective outsiders, were able to discuss problems in their relationship they couldn’t resolve between the three of them. So Walter’s call, late on a Friday night, was cause enough for concern. ‘It’s about time he came inside anyway. Hold on.’ Walter sat listening to the muted sound of the TV in the background as Dana left the receiver on the kitchen counter and went in search of her husband. ‘What’s up Walter?’ ‘John, look, it sounds stupid. Alex and Fox bought these new chairs.’ ‘Yeah, it was s’posed to be a surprise for you.’ ‘You knew about it?’ ‘Yeah. They dragged me along when they bought them.’ ‘They’re sulking because I thought we should have discussed buying something like that.’ ‘I’ll come over in the morning.’ ‘No, John, really…’ ‘Hey, I was there when they bought them. They didn’t tell me you have a rule about discussing…’ John realised he was treading a fine line between discussing the nature of Walter’s relationship with his two former subordinates, which he knew was, in some aspects, far from equal, and making Walter uncomfortable. ‘We don’t have a rule John. I just think…’ Realising he’d got it wrong, John interrupted: ‘Eight okay with you? I promised to take Dana and the kids out for the day.’ Walter sighed. ‘Sure. Thanks.’ When Walter came to bed, both Fox and Alex were doing a poor job of pretending to be asleep. Walter decided to leave them to their sulking. ************ The following morning… ‘Hi John.’ Fox looked up from his newspaper as John came into the kitchen. It had taken a while before any of them were comfortable living in a neighborhood where it was expected that, unless you were out, your door would be unlocked. ‘Fox. Is Alex around?’ ‘Yeah. He’ll be down in a minute. You want some coffee?’ ‘Thanks.’ John dropped into a chair opposite Fox and picked up the discarded Business section of the newspaper. ‘How’re your new chairs?’ Fox scowled. ‘Walter hated them.’ ‘Really?’ John asked mildly. ‘He said we should have talked about buying them. We did, remember?’ ‘Not with Walter.’ ‘It was a surprise.’ John turned at the sound of Alex’s voice from the doorway. ‘Hey Alex. So why d’you think he wasn’t happy?’ ‘I don’t know.’ Alex snapped, helping himself to a mug of coffee. ‘Maybe because you agreed you’d talk about large purchases.’ ‘They’re just chairs.’ Alex huffed, dropping into the chair next to Fox. ‘Expensive chairs.’ John pointed out. ‘We’ll take them back.’ Fox said crossly. ‘And we won’t ever buy something without talking about it first.’ John bit back a smile. He looked from Fox to Alex. How Walter managed not to kill either of them on a daily basis, he would never know. ‘Look, you two have a heap of money. Walter’s a divorced guy on a Government pension. D’you ever stop to think that maybe he wants to buy you guys things like the chairs but he can’t?’ Fox and Alex looked at each other then at John. He stared back, eyebrows raised. ‘Well?’ ‘We never talk about money. There’s always…enough.’ ‘Maybe you should Fox.’ Fox’s shoulders drooped. ‘O-kay.’ ‘Right, I’m gonna head off. We’re taking the kids to the beach.’ John got up and put his cup in the sink. ************ By the time Walter came down, hair still damp from the shower, John was gone. ‘Good morning.’ Walter said, determinedly acting as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. Alex got up, poured Walter a mug of coffee then nodded at Fox. ‘Um, Walter, we’ve, um, decided to take the, um, chairs back.’ ‘Why?’ Walter asked, disappointed that his acting wouldn’t be eligible for an Oscar. ‘Cos you were right.’ Alex helped out. ‘We should have talked about buying them.’ ‘So we’re gonna get the shop to take ours back. We want you to keep yours. We bought it for you as a present and you should keep it.’ Walter groaned inwardly. Clearly Fox and Alex didn’t understand his feelings about the chairs. ‘I don’t want you to give up your chairs. I want us to talk about buying things for the house. It doesn’t matter if it’s a picture frame or a TV. We all live here and we should all have a say in what comes into the house. And trying to convince yourselves that the reason you bought three chairs is because you wanted to buy me a present is just self-delusion. You wanted the chairs. That’s fine. But I would have liked to have been included in the discussion about buying them. I don’t expect or need expensive presents from either of you.’ ‘You don’t want us to buy you presents?’ Walter took a deep breath. Alex in ‘hurt’ mode was almost too much this early in the day. ‘Alex, I love it when you buy me presents. But I’m saying I don’t expect expensive presents. I’m quite happy with a magazine or a new tie.’ Alex shrugged, getting up. ‘I don’t get it.’ Fox patted the seat next to his. ‘I do. Come sit here.’ Alex dropped into position between Fox and Walter. ‘Walter knows we only said we bought him the chair as a present cos we wanted one each for us. Remember how long we took choosing the couch? The store was almost closing before we made our minds up. But that was because we all had a part in the decision. Walter didn’t have any part in the decision about the chairs and he should have. So in future we only buy him Law Enforcement Monthly or ties with tiny Hoover building motifs, okay?’ Walter chuckled. He was almost sure Fox had explained his point to Alex. Almost. Alex thought for a moment. ‘It’s not the cost. It’s that we didn’t ask your opinion.’ ‘Exactly Alex.’ Walter said, smiling. ‘Do we have to take our chairs back?’ Alex asked, sure he wasn’t going to like the answer. Walter laughed. ‘No Alex, you don’t have to take the chairs back. I love it that you thought what I’d like most in the world was a chair with a built-in massage function.’ ‘You didn’t tell me it had a…’ Alex looked accusingly at Fox. Fox smiled, giggling. ‘Wanna go try it out?’ He had barely got the words out when Alex was already on his feet and in the living room. He lowered himself into his chair and looked up at Fox who had followed him and across to where Walter stood in the kitchen doorway. ‘Which button is it?’ ‘This one.’ Fox said, flicking a rocker switch. The chair emitted a low hum and Fox could feel the vibration through the floor. ‘Omigod!’ Alex almost shrieked. ‘This is…wow!’ Walter came up behind Fox, putting an arm around his shoulder. ‘What say we leave the man to his chair?’ Fox took one last look at the blissful expression on Alex’s face then turned and followed Walter back into the kitchen. ‘You called John, didn’t you.’ ‘Yeah.’ Walter handed Fox a refilled mug of coffee. ‘You know it doesn’t matter how much money you have, right?’ Trying not to show his instinctive reaction to the question, Walter nodded. But Fox had spent too much time with his former boss and put a hand out, covering Walter’s with his own. ‘We’re alive. We’re together. Alex is…’ Both of them listened to the occasional moans and whimpers coming through the door from the living room. ‘Happy?’ Walter offered. ‘Definitely.’ Fox concurred. ‘Those are the important things.’ Walter looked into Fox’s bright eyes. ‘I know Fox. I know.’ End Return to the X-Files Fic Index Return to the West Wing Fic Index
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