Letter From The Commish

My, my, my. What a tangled web we weave. Five weeks into the season and no team has four wins yet. Only two teams have less than two wins, one if you count NFC Norris who forgot to submit a complete lineup in Week 5 and have claimed their 2nd victory as a result. Net, net, that means 10 teams with either two or three victories thus far. It's enough to make Pete Rozelle proud. That being the case, even the two 1-4 teams are still only 2 games behind with 10 to play.

We've got the previously woeful King of Dogs sporting a new look and a bark as loud as ever leading the way at 3-1-1 in the Howe division which, to this point, has been the league's toughest based on cumulative record (all four teams at .500 or above) and three of the four top scoring teams through Week 5.

Over in the Dewey division, PMS is tied with the Palace of Swords at 3-2. The Swords, along with the Thighmasters, have been the two hottest teams these past two weeks. Each have scored 117 points in Weeks 4 & 5 combined. PMS, while 3-2, already has two division losses which could seriously hurt them in December if tiebreakers become an issue. Plus, one of those division losses is to the Swords, the team PMS is tied in the standings with.

The Cheatem division looked as though Montezuma might finally get its revenge indeed after the first three weeks. But now Coach Unger's team has fallen back to the pack, dropping its last two and scoring a combined 51 points in doing so. Nevertheless, the Revenge is still tied with Greenback Iguanas at 3-2. The teams are separated by only 3 points in offense and the Iguanas, despite being 3-2, have actually been slightly outscored on the season.

The Bearded Clams and Natural Mystics have the dubious distinction of allowing an average of over 40 points per game to date as teams seem to light it up on them each week. It'd be worse for the Mystics than 41.6 if not for the Retreads scoring 'only' 34 points this week against them. Likwise for the Clams if not for allowing only 27 to the Revenge this past Sunday and only 20 to the Highways in Week 1. And what about the Highways? The joke since last year is that the league has caught up to Coach Widtfeldt but Coach isn't laughing anymore. In truth, his once proud Highways are averaging a league low 19.8 ppg (99 points overall) through Week 5. At that current pace, the Highways would finish with 297 points. That would be the 2nd lowest alltime total in OFFL history behind Featherston's Falcons' 262 in 1996. It would rank just ahead of the current #2 King of Dogs who scored 302 points just last season. Through it all, the Highways gave only allowed 133 points. What this says is that, with even a couple breaks here or there, the Highways could easily be 3-2 at worst. As it stands, they're still only 2 games out thanks to the parity that pervades the league through five weeks. Speaking of low scoring teams, All World must be feeling left out lately because, over its past three games, it has combined for the whopping total of 37 points; all this after scoring 40 and 43 points in Weeks 1 & 2. The NFC Norris have scored a respectable 166 points despite getting only 12 in Week 5. They've allowed 168 points. Sounds like they should be around .500, right? Think again. They stand 1-4. How's that for luck?

In the power rankings, we find the Retreads listed #10, far below where we've become accustomed to seeing them the past couple years. But, wait. They're still 3-2. How can this be when you've got NFC Norris at #8 despite its 1-4 record and you've got the Natural Mystics at #2 while being fortunate to be at 2-2-1? The OFFL Gods never cease to amaze the Commish. The Retreads have won games by the scores of 28-25 over the Highways and 12-6 to All World. That last one is painful just thinking about! 12-6. I said 12-6. That's a game no one should be proud of. In eight years of OFFL history, no team had ever won a game with fewer points. Leave it to Mr. Lucky! Isn't it enough that Coach D knows his players pretty well as it is without having the ball bouncing his way on top of it? Overall, though, based on the power rankings, it would appear that the most consistent teams the first five weeks have been the Natural Mystics (only Week 4 was a down week), PMS (only Week 1 with a ranking of 0-11) and Montezuma's Revenge (although, at 3-8 the past two weeks, they need a turnaround in Week 6 vs. the Mystics).

On an individual level, the league MVP through Week 5 is Kurt Warner, hands down. Despite absolutely no running game for Grandmaster G (OK, Warrick Dunn did score 6 points in Week 3 but that's it. Really. No joke. Just 6 points. For the year. That's all Gigi RBs combined), the Gigis lead the league in scoring based on the strength of Warner and the Gigis' other two Rams, Torey Holt and Jeff Wilkins. Here's hoping they can keep it up otherwise we're going to see the Meisterburgers fall to earth quicker than the Hindenburg. At RB, Marshall Faulk has built a 20 point lead over the #2 RB Edgerrin James. And Jeff Wilkins leads the #2 kicker by a 62-35 advantage (Jason Hanson being #2). OK, so here's our OFFL All Pro team through five weeks:

QB-Kurt Warner
RB-Marshall Faulk
RB-Edgerrin James
WR-Jimmy Smith
WR-Isaac Bruce
TE-Jackie Harris (huh?)
U-Curtis Martin/Mike Alstott (tied)
K-Jeff Wilkins
D-Broncos

As you all know, what makes the selections objective is that they're based on actual points scored; nothing more, nothing less.

And speaking of being objective, the Commish has tried to be exactly that for the past six seasons (he also ran it Year One; Year Two, of course, was the (repeat after me--I know Coach Widtfeldt is) year of the fire); running his team and yet putting it second to the health of the league when necessary. He has read numerous articles over the years describing the qualities needed by a commissioner to run a league effectively and harmoniously and has strived to do so. While he understands every year has its touchy moments, it's been with some disappointment that he's had to address a couple issues this season; issues that have dampened his (and probably others') enjoyment and he wishes to set a couple things straight. First, regarding money, it's true the Commish gets a 'pass' on the dues. Being 100% objective, let it be said that in 2001 (assuming there is a 2001), we can certainly migrate the league over to CBS Sportsline for free. Or NFL.com. There are others. He, too, can begin paying like everyone else. The reason for the free pass has, as everyone knows, been the result of the time put into the league: newsletters, letters from the commish, power rankings, swami sez and all the other add-ons that have been developed over the years right down to maintaining a league record book. But these are luxury items, not necessities. We could always do without and simply streamline the process. The Commish always has and always will abide by the league majority, founding father that he is. For the record, it's the Commishes personal belief that, at some point, we should raise the entry fee--however nominally. It's been $75 for 3 or 4 years now. Of course, inflation itself has gone up over that time. Further, any approval does not take affect for one additional year; this was a rule voted in just because it WAS a money issue and needs to be dealt with a little more carefully than most. The Commish voted against the $100 proposal this season but was in favor of the $80 proposal. He does respect Coach Pedersen's opinion that perhaps the Commish should not vote on money proposals and, truth be told, see the logic. At the time this was being discussed via the bulletin board, I chose to stay out of the dialogue, wanting it to run its course without commissioner influence (again, just another skill the commish has learned over the years--a time to speak up and a time to let silence speak for him. Why didn't I know this back when I was married?). But the Commish will leave it you other league members to discuss this over the upcoming weeks and months and see where it leads us.

As to the other thing on the Commish's mind, and heart, is this week's 'to do' regarding the submission of lineups. First, let it be said the Commish appreciates those teams that have come to his defense. The Commish wishes to denigrate no one. Over the years, all joking has been just that--joking. The Commish cannot afford to alienate anyone and hope to remain impartial. But what disappoints is that this issue alrady (get it?) came up earlier this season with the King of Dogs (who took it graciously, by the way). As was explained in the bulletin board, this is that occasional grey area for which even our fairly detailed rule book has no answer. We just always assumed that any team submitting a lineup wouldn't... (let's be politically correct here) neglect to submit a complete one. We only considered the "all or nothing" scenario. Weighing the situation, the Commish made what he felt was the best decision possible for all parties involved. Unfortunately, in a situation such as this, there is no "right" answer and no resolution ideal to all parties. All I can be is as fair as I can possibly be. And I've tried to be so. I sincerely hope that that attribute is coming across. This issue ties to the other one in that perhaps it's time for the other 11 league members to debate the worthiness of going to another online provider next season. Do we want that? If not, are we happy with the status quo? Is there someone else among us who wants to give the Commissioner spot a try and maintain the website or take the league back offline? Let's hear what you all have to say. Until then...

~Go deep, I'll throw it.

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