Dave's Sick Little World

5-12-98: Okra: Sure you can eat gumbo with chopsticks. You just have to be real good with them. But you'd have to like okra. That just makes none of it okay, anyway. Okra is stringy, gummy, slimy, vile stuff, fit only for emetic use. Think of a wet green veggie sack, containing thin, runny slime, that goops up in one piece. It's like eating and swallowing a runny glob of plant snot. Just what *I* wanted -- To have a string of goop stuck from the back of my tongue all the way down my throat. If coughed it into a napkin, you sure as hell wouldn't expect me to eat it; so why the hell will you eat it out of a green pod? Don't green pods take over the planet or something?

5-13-98: It has finally come to me, after long years of deep thought. Elvira will forever have what it takes. Pure and simple.

6-18-98: Yeah, BFD, so it takes me a while to heave up the ambergris of my soul onto the internet's answer to Las Vegas -- all the charm and style, with less chance of getting your fingers broken. Anyway, it's updated: I pretend it's important, you pretend to care.

3-06-01: How's that for a layover? And you people think you can procrastinate. Don't try this at home, kids. I'm a professional.

Make it stop! Make it stop!