"HOW TO PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE FROM
THE TONGUES OF GOSSIP MONGERS"
“The train is about to leave”
Copyright C 1998 by J.A.Mcbean.
Library of Congress
Washington.D.C.20559
T ommy Newberry In his book “Success Is Not An Accident” He say” Success is not an accident! This is, without a doubt, the single most important lesson you must learn and really understand if you want to develop your full potential and enjoy all the success you were designed to enjoy. Success in life comes from one thing: deciding exactly what you want to accomplish and then deliberately choosing to invest the minutes and hours of your life doing only those things that move you in the direction of your goal. It is simple. It is the truth. And the moment you fully accept it, your life and the lives of those you love will never again be the same. Success, however you choose to define it, is absolutely predictable.”
I saw a man by the sea fishing in New York. I join him; pretty soon, we begin to talk. He had a great marriage, but one day he came home from work and his wife had move out on him, for five years he had no knowledge of where she was and why she move out. One day after five years he pass by certain building, he heard a woman call out to him from up top, he know her, she was his wife best friend. She throws down her keys to him so he opened the main door and went up. She invite him to stay for the night, she told him that his wife move back to Guyana and build a house. When he was making sex with this woman she told him that she wanted him a long time ago but the other woman was in the way. As he made love to her, she keeps talking. Then, he found out that it was this woman told his stuff about him and cause her to leave the United State and went home. Getting her out of the way. She was scared to go by the house because she thinks the husband would find out what she did.
ANTICIPATE THE PROBLEMS THAT PELAGE MARRIAGES AND DEAL WITH IT EVEN BEFORE IT BECAME A PROBLEM IN YOUR LIFE:
Just like every thing else, the success of marriage are base on principles, and not just luck. It is a principle that anybody that learn it can have the same result. Some of the problems that seem to bring down marriages are lunch room gossips.
BOTH HUSBAND AND WIFE MUST HAVE A GAME PLAN AND HOW TO DEAL WITH HEAR SAYS.
To escape the power and traps of gossips a husband and wife have to give their marriage foundations. What I mean by foundation, is to establish and put certain principles in place that you both are wiling to fallow. Have a plan and how to deal with hear says. One of the biggest death traps to a marriage is the envious eyes and the long tongues of another woman. Let me give you an example. One woman will tell the other one. “You and your husband are really enjoying yourselves, I saw his car at a hotel” What she is trying to do is to plant doubt in the wife mind as to your husband behaviour, and she is counting on you not to ask him back when you go home, but to go home and act moody, withdrawn, and bitchy. This is going to cause the man to arrive at his own crazy conclusion. He will think that the woman has found a man and is having a relationship on the side.
BEWARE OF WOMEN FRIENDS.
Sirach 42:13. For just as moths comes from garments, so harm to women comes from women.
The New American Bible. Saint Joseph Edition. Catholic Book Publishing Company.
Sirach 37:7. Every counselor points out a way, but some counsel ways of their own; be on the alert when one proffers advice, find out first of all what he wants. For he may be thinking of himself alone; why should the profit fall to him?
The New American Bible. Saint Joseph Edition. Catholic Book Publishing Company.
HOW TO DEAL WITH A GOSSIP MONGERS.
You will need to ask the gossip mongers a series of questions starting with the most important questions first. Bear in mind that a gossip mongers hardly ever loose, because these first befriend and study the victims, so as to played them well. A gossip monger does not like to see when a other woman get lucky or hit is big with a man. Sometime it was only a joke or prank, to see how you would react, but that prank set off whole motions of trouble.
(1) What hotel or motel did you saw my husband car? (2) What time of day was it? (3) What day was it? You ask one questions then talk a little than ask another questions, always pretending as you swallow the bates. If you act like you are in doubt and like you have the gossip monger on trial, she will begin to step backward until she walk away. You do not want the gossip mongers to leave and feel like she has fails in planting doubt and mistrust in you mind. Or poison your head. If the gossip mongers fail, the next step is go and told your husband the same thing about you. One gossip mongers was working over my wife the same way at the same time the gossip mongers are offering to rent me a room in her house.
(4) Did you saw my husband or did you saw the car only? (5) Did you write down the tag number?
You will need this information because when you reach home you should ask your husband. You most be able to say “Honey, One of the girls on my job make jokes that she saw your car at a motel. Where were you on certain date, at certain time?" Reader might say, “You need to trust each other” only if it has no effect on your attitudes and emotions. Allegation like this has to be search out. The husband has a right to know that lies have been told on him, and if he is guilty, he need to know that he as been caught.
DO NOT MAKE A GOSSIP MONGER LOCK YOUR MOUTH
One of the most hurtful things is to be dealing with people who hear something about you, and refuses to say what is the problem, so the things can be cleared up and get the relationship back on track. This is one of the prime reason why I do not like even to visit Church of God Church. They would never say what they heard, but they show it up in their action that they heard something, and they keep dropping words. After awhile people, begin leaving the church one by one. Give your marriage foundation, you and your mate must be able to be approachable by each other. Say what is on your mind so the problem can be fix. Do not make the gossip monger told you not to ask back.
FALLING INTO BAD RELATIONSHIP.
Bad relationship is the number one obstacles for marriage Christians. Many Christian continue serving the lord good, right up to the time when they got married. After the marriage, their faith went down hill. This could have been prevented if they did anticipate the problems and deal with it. You might say "But they do not know what problems that are going to have" There are a list of pit falls that Satan has that he uses on married people and it is the same old list Satan have for every body.
POWER STRUGGLE
Amos 3:3-AV Can two walk together, except they be agreed?
A couple must decide on who is the leader in the relationship, even before moving in together. Somebody will have to be the leader. The president of the United States is there for emergency decisions. Congress can be tied up on decisions for years. In time of war and time of great stress, when an immediate decisions is needed, there is no time for long drawn out, and endless debating. The president has emergency powers; where he can get up and say" This is how it must go" The president has to use his emergency powers, until congress can come up with an agreement. Somebody in the marriage has to have that power. The Bible say it is the man must have this power in the marriage.
Ephes. 5:23 (KJV) For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Many women do not agree with this, but when trouble came, they run behind the man. James 3:16-AV For where envying and strife [is], there [is] confusion and every evil work.
One of the easiest ways to put an end to the power struggle that seems to kill many Marriages are for the man to choose a much younger woman, that himself. We see in the Bible Abraham was ten years older than his wife. When we were going to school a girl that was our age was much mature that the boys, and would not even listen to us. It was impossible for those girls to be in subjecting to us when we were just idiots to them. So even before the two people move in together they must decide on who is the leader in the relationship. Do not assumed any thing, talk about it, and document it in the premarital agreement.
In the book “Politics and people”
Robert Townsend said” All people have needs. The way we act is determined by needs that are not yet satisfied. Our needs form a kind of ladder. Until a person’s needs have been satisfied on a lower level, he or she won’t be interested in satisfying needs on a higher level.”
In the book “Philosopher in Medicine” By Dr. Samuel Thompson. Publisher. Lindsay & Blankiston, 25 South Sixth Street, above Chestnut, Philadelphia. 1850. Page 427, “Gonorrhea”
“The peace of families has in some instances been destroyed, by a wife or husband being affected with symptoms resembling those attending the venereal disease, at the same time the accused party being entirely innocent. Instances have occurred in the which symptoms of gonorrhea have occurred in men, in consequence of the wife being affected with a severe form of fluor albus, or whites, each party accusing the other of infidelity” If the woman has a deficiency of estrogen, she easily fall prey to infections which will also infect her husband, many a family has been broken up over such thing.
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HOW DOES A PERSON BECOME A CHRISTIANS?
How does a person become a Christian, and are sure that he/she is save? First the person must know that he/she is a sinner and need deliverance from the lord.
Romans 3:23 (KJV) for all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;
Galatians 3:22 (KJV) But the scripture hath concluded all under sin, that the promise by faith of Jesus Christ might be given to them that believe.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT THERE IS A GOD.
Hebrews 11:6 NKJV But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT GOD IS READY TO FORGIVE HIM.
Isaiah 55:7 (KJV)Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the Lord, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT CHRIST DIED FOR HIM.
Romans 5:6 (KJV) For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.
Romans 5:8 (KJV)But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
1 Cor. 15:3-8 (KJV) For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; [4] And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures: [5] And that he was seen of Cephas, then of the twelve: [6] After that, he was seen of above five hundred brethren at once; of whom the greater part remain unto this present, but some are fallen asleep. [7] After that, he was seen of James; then of all the apostles. [8] And last of all he was seen of me also, as of one born out of due time.
The sinner must believe that God can keep him save.
Ephes. 3:20 (KJV) Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,
Jude 1:24 (KJV) Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy,
PERFECTING THE SAINTS IS A WORK OF GOD.
1 Peter 5:10 (KJV) But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, establish, strengthen, settle you.
THE SINNER MUST KNOW THAT ONLY JESUS CAN SAVE THEM.
Acts 4:12 (KJV) Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.
THE SINNER MUST MAKE A DECISION TODAY.
Isaiah 1:18 (KJV) Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.
2 Cor. 6:2 (KJV) (For he saith, I have heard thee in a time accepted, and in the day of salvation have I succoured thee: behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.)
BOW YOUR HEAD AND PRAY THIS PRAYER.
Lord I am a sinner and need your salvation. Forgive all my sins. I accept your son Jesus as my savior today.
DROP ALL PRE-CONCEIVE IDEAS OF CHRISTIANITY.
Drop all preconceived ideas of Christianity because these conflict with the reality of Christianity. The lord will live the life through you day by day. You do not drop things from your life on your own. The spirit of God will walk you out of sins in his own time.
FIRST HUMBLING YOU.
Ephes. 2:8-9 (KJV)For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: [9] Not of works, lest any man should boast.
If you stop sins and get holy before God’s timing you will begin to boast how it is your own magnetism got you so far, then you became a source of discouragement to others. Therefore, you are going to stuck upon a sin or two. The sin always getting the better of you. This will push you to always accept God’s grace, and to see your own frailness.
1 John 1:8 (KJV) If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
SOMETIME ONLY CHRIST JESUS CAN HELP US:
Matthew 6:33-AV But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
Isaiah 55:6-AV Seek ye the LORD while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near: Isaiah 55:7-AV Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the LORD, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
LOOK AT THE BENEFITS OF BECOMING A CHRISTIAN:
How does a person become a Christian, and are sure that he/she is save? First the person must know that he/she is a sinner and need deliverance from the lord.
Romans 3:23 (KJV) for all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;
Galatians 3:22 (KJV) But the scripture hath concluded all under sin, that the promise by faith of Jesus Christ might be given to them that believe.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT THERE IS A GOD:
Hebrews 11:6 NKJV But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT GOD IS READY TO FORGIVE HIM:
Isaiah 55:7 (KJV)Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the Lord, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT CHRIST DIED FOR HIM:
Romans 5:6 (KJV) For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.
Romans 5:8 (KJV)But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
1 Cor. 15:3-8 (KJV) For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; [4] And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures: [5] And that he was seen of Cephas, then of the twelve: [6] After that, he was seen of above five hundred brethren at once; of whom the greater part remain unto this present, but some are fallen asleep. [7] After that, he was seen of James; then of all the apostles. [8] And last of all he was seen of me also, as of one born out of due time.
MUST BELIEVE THAT GOD CAN KEEP HIM:
Ephes. 3:20 (KJV) Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,
Jude 1:24 (KJV) Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy,
PERFECTING THE SAINTS IS A WORK OF GOD:
1 Peter 5:10 (KJV) But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, establish, strengthen, settle you.
THE SINNER MUST KNOW THAT ONLY JESUS CAN SAVE THEM:
Acts 4:12 (KJV) Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.
THE SINNER MUST MAKE A DECISION TODAY:
Isaiah 1:18 (KJV) Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.
2 Cor. 6:2 (KJV) (For he saith, I have heard thee in a time accepted, and in the day of salvation have I succoured thee: behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.)
BOW YOUR HEAD AND PRAY THIS PRAYER:
Lord I am a sinner and need your salvation. Forgive all my sins. I accept your son Jesus as my savior today.
We can sing with the song writer" I rise walk in heaven’s own light above the world and sin with heart made pure and garments white, and Christ en-throned with in. The cleansing stream I see I see I plunge, and O It cleans-eth me. O praise the Lord, it cleans-eth me, it cleans-eth me yes, cleans-eth me."
DROP ALL PRE-CONCEIVE IDEAS OF CHRISTIANITY:
Drop all preconceived ideas of Christianity because these conflict with the reality of Christianity. The lord will live the life through you day by day. You do not drop things from your life on your own. The spirit of God will walk you out of sins in his own time.
FIRST HUMBLING YOU:
Ephes. 2:8-9 (KJV)For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: [9] Not of works, lest any man should boast.
If you stop sins and get holy before God’s timing you will begin to boast how it is your own magnetism got you so far, then you became a source of discouragement to others. Therefore, you are going to stuck upon a sin or two. The sin always getting the better of you. This will push you to always accept God’s grace, and to see your own frailness.
1 John 1:8 (KJV) If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
TO CONTINUE GROWING IN GOD:
1 Peter 2:2 (KJV) As newborn babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby:
2 Peter 1:5-10 (NKJV) But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, 6 to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, 7 to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love. 8 For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 For he who lacks these things is shortsighted, even to blindness, and has forgotten that he was cleansed from his old sins. 10 Therefore, brethren, be even more diligent to make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble.
FINDING OUT YOUR CALLING:
When I was newly save, the believers always, ask me if I know the will of God for my life! I never really know what they were talking about. Every person that was saved had a mission and a gift. However, because you are just a babe in Christ you do not know any of these. As you go on with the lord his will for you will unfolds day bay day. Do not run off and make any big commitment. Your mate has to be tailor made for you by God. You are now a citizen of heaven. Heaven does not rule by democracy. You cannot serve God with democratic mind set.
WHAT YOU MUST DROP OFF:
Hebrews 12:1 (Living Bible) Since we have such a huge crowd of men of faith watching us from the grandstands, let us strip off anything that slows us down or holds us back, and especially those sins that wrap themselves so tightly around our feet and trip us up; and let us run with patience the particular race that God has set before us.
Ephes. 4:31 (Living Bible) Stop being mean, bad-tempered, and angry. Quarreling, harsh words, and dislike of others should have no place in your lives.
Col. 3:8 (Living Bible) but now is the time to cast off and throw away all these rotten garments of anger, hatred, cursing, and dirty language.
GET A GOOD BIBLE, AND FIND A GOOD CHURCH:
One of the best Bibles out there is the New King James Version. Dake’s annotated Bible is very good. Next, you need a living bible to make some thing simple.
Hebrews 10:25 (Living Bible) Let us not neglect our church meetings, as some people do, but encourage and warn each other, especially now that the day of his coming back again is drawing near.
PROTECTING YOURSELF FROM BEING SPOILED BY MAN:
Col. 2:8 (KJV)Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.
Hebrews 13:9 (KJV) Be not carried about with divers and strange doctrines. For it is a good thing that the heart be established with grace; not with meats, which have not profited them that have been occupied therein.
Seven Ways that People Can Spoil Christians:
1. Through philosophy (Col. 2:8)
2. Through vain deceit (Col. 2:4,8,18-19)
3. Through human traditions (Col. 2:8)
4. Through human religion and world principles contrary to the gospel (Col. 2:8,14-23; note, §Galatians 4:3)
5. Through circumcision (Col. 2:11-13; Acts 15:1; Romans 4:9-16; Galatians 5:1-11)
6. Through the law of Moses, demanding observance of the laws on meats, drinks, holy days, new moons, feasts, and sabbaths (Col. 2:14-17)
7. Through cults that puff up and imitate the gospel (Col. 2:18-23)
By all these means, unsuspecting souls are being carried off as plunder and booty by false teachers. The founders of false religions and human philosophies which pamper the flesh and give their victims elated feelings of importance make an appeal to them.
Christianity is loaded down with some false concept. Some little believe system, which are spread by false believers. One of such teaching is that you must “Look like Christians” How does Christians look? Genuine Christianity is not an external thing but of the heart and spirit.
Micah 6:8 (KJV)He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?
When cults capture a newly converted Christians, the cult first job on that new believer is to close their mind. Preventing the new believer from reading any material from other churches. So that new believer will never get out of their trap.
YOUR HORMONE DOES NOT STOP WORKING WITH CHRISTIANITY:
Philip. 3:20-21 (KJV)For our conversation is in heaven; from whence also we look for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ: [21] Who shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body, according to the working whereby he is able even to subdue all things unto himself.
Romans 8:23 (KJV) And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body.
Our bodies were not save at conversion. The work of redemption took place in your spirit man. Our body will be redeemed at the return of our lord. We are still waiting for the redemption of our body.
According to Philip 3:20-21 and Romans 8:23. You are still going to have urges. You have to present your body to the lord as a living sacrifice. Not dead one. Living sacrifice give trouble, you will have trouble keeping that body tied to the altar. However, as you and I grow in the lord what seem impossible will be quite possible.
Come back for update soon.
Bearer Of The Mind Sword.
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