Blind Date by Pam Gamble eksphyl@yahoo.com SUMMARY: Mulder and Scully are in a relationship, when Scully's mother makes her an offer she can't refuse. RATING: PG CLASSIFICATION: MSR, Humor AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story is total fluff, and if anyone says otherwise, DENY EVERYTHING! DISCLAIMER: I just bought all the rights to the X-Files, so all you fanfic writers pay up now! I'll be rich, rich, rich!!!! ARCHIVE: Sure, just let me know. DEDICATION: To NotAmy, because I like calling her that. BONUS POINTS: To anyone who can identify the Violent Femmes reference in this story. (HINT: If you have to ask who they are, you won't find it:-) -------------- "But Mom..." Pause. "Yes, but..." Pause. "But I don't..." *Long* pause. "Well, no. But..." Pause. Sigh. "Oh, alright. Fine." "Love you too." "Goodbye." Mulder watched with amusement as Scully put down the receiver. He'd been a very appreciative audience to the whole conversation, really. "Mom says Hi." She immediately buried her face in a file. "Are you arguing with your mother?" he chided. "Dana Scully, you should be ashamed. You know, your mother knows best." Scully's head flew up, eyes wide. "Oh, you think so, do you Mulder? Well..." She pointed a pen at him and he waited for the ranting to commence. But it didn't. Scully blew out a puff of air, then sat back in her chair. "You're probably right", she said softly. "Come on," he was still grinning and not about to give up so easily. He'd rarely seen Scully so flustered. He'd always thought he was the *only* one who could get that reaction from her. "What did she want?" "Nothing." Back into the file. "Oh, come on, Scully. What was it?" Scully glared at him. "Not now, Mulder." Mulder made a show of being disappointed, but the look in his eyes told her he understood. Working for the FBI, they fully expected their phone conversations to be monitored, and half-expected their offices to be. Their new relationship could be a powerful trump card if the wrong person chose to play it. So they had to be very careful about what they said. When they said it. Sometimes *how* they said things. Skinner knew. But he wasn't the one they were afraid of. The smoking man, or whoever he worked for, could have moles planted in the Bureau. He'd had Krycek. Could have bugged their office. Could and would extract information by any means necessary. So they took not chances. At work, they remained absolutely professional. They were almost as careful after work. They swept for bugs regularly. Took cabs to see each other, alternating companies and drivers. They didn't want to make anyone a potential target for the Consortium. Or an innocent victim. The Gunmen knew too. But since they couldn't really get any more paranoid that they already were, they felt fairly safe. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Scully knocked twice right under the number 42. Her irritation with her mother had drained away during the day, to be replaced by amusement. Okay--there was still a little irritation left. Impatiently, she rapped quickly again on the door. She heard the chain slide out and the door opened. Seeing the expression on her face, Mulder said nothing but stepped back as she walked inside. He closed the door behind her. She'd been like this all day, and couldn't or wouldn't tell him why at the office. He'd driven himself crazy all day trying to figure it out. What could her sweet, wonderful mother have done to upset her this much? Scully turned, arms crossed. "She wants me to go on a blind date." A laugh escaped before he could catch it, earning him a high magnitude Scully-glare. He shut up. "A date, Mulder. Some friend of hers has a son who just got divorced and 'wouldn't it be nice if we just had dinner?' Scully flung her body down onto his couch. "What am I supposed to tell her?" Mulder tried hard not to look amused. "No?" he suggested. Her face softened, and she was smiling now. "I can't do that." "Why not?" He came over to sit beside her. She looked at him sadly. "I don't want her to know. If she knows it could put her in danger one day." She reached over to take his hand. "It's one thing for Skinner to know. Our job is to take risks. And Frohike and the guys--well..." Scully shrugged. "But I can't tell her something like this and ask her to keep it a secret." "And if you explain why..." Mulder was already following her train of thought. "Then she would worry about me, us, even more than she does now."Scully rested her head in her hands. "I just can't put her in that position." She shook her head. "I just can't." Mulder reached for her hand again, his voice low and deep. "And I would never ask you to, Scully." She turned to look at him. "What are you saying?" Mulder stood, his hand still holding hers. "I'm saying you *have* to go on that date." He grinned at how ridiculous it sounded. With a tug on her hand, he pulled her off the couch and into his arms. "Cheer up," he smirked. "Maybe he'll be cute." Scully let her forehead fall onto his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Oh, Mulder. How do we do this to ourselves?" "We?" He looked down at the top of her head. "*I'm* not the one with the hot date." Scully tilted her head back so he would be sure to see the annoyance on her face. He saw it. "Come on, Scully. It's just dinner. How bad could it be?" "You're saying this doesn't bother you at all?" Mulder shrugged. "As long as he doesn't try to kiss you. Or touch you. Or look at you. Actually, could you just have this date over the phone? I used to do it all the time." She laughed, and walked over to the phone. "Pizza?" she asked. "Chinese?" Mulder pleaded. Scully nodded and dialed, placing their order for dinner. They always ordered out at his place;Scully was convinced he didn't even know there *was* a supermarket in his neighborhood. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX When they'd finished dinner, Mulder stood behind her and began to rub her temples slowly. "Mmmmm...." "You've been quiet. Still upset about your date?" She shook her head. Mulder kept rubbing. "I was just thinking. If we weren't...if I did go on a date...I wouldn't even know what to say, what to talk about. 'Hey, have you heard about the latest government conspiracy?' isn't exactly a successful pickup line." "I don't know," Mulder smirked. "It worked for me." He leaned down to kiss the top of her head. "Yes, but not at first." "Really?" he asked, genuinely surprised. "Well, maybe a little," she smiled, remembering. He ran his fingers through her hair, combing it back. "You wanted me the minute you saw me, admit it." Scully was silent. "Scully?" She sighed. "Okay. I did. But I still thought you were weird." He grinned. She was almost afraid to ask. "What about you?" He thought for a second. "I've always liked beautiful women, but I never wanted to get to know them because I never liked them as people. So I pushed you away for a long time." He rested his hands on her shoulders. "So I guess I was surprised when I found out that I loved *all* of you. And that didn't happen the first day I met you. It happens every day I know you." Scully shifted in her chair to sit on her knees facing him. "That is the most beautiful thing anyone's ever said to me." She reached up to touch his face. "Thank you." He leaned down into her lips. "I love you." His hands traveled up her neck to hold her face, and he kissed her. A long, deep kiss that made her forget she'd ever been kissed before. She got up out of her chair and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you, too. More than anything." "Let's go to bed." "But it's only 8:30." He looked at her like she was a slow learner. "Well, I wasn't going to *sleep*, Scully." Her eyes brightened. "Hey, maybe I'll get lucky Friday night. Y'think?" she teased. She led him over to the couch. "You do and it'll be the *last* time that guy ever has sex, so make it good," he grumbled. Scully grabbed his tie and pulled him down on the couch, pulling off his clothes quickly. "I think I like it when you're jealous," she smiled up at him. "I think when I get back--the next morning--" she emphasized, "I'll have to tell you *all* about my wonderful date," she prodded him in a singsong voice. Mulder growled and began to bite her neck, once so hard she knew she'd have to wear a turtleneck the next day. "I'll tell you what he looked like." Mulder huffed in her ear, squeezing her breasts tightly. "And how he made me feel..." Mulder's hands grabbed her around the waist, pulling her closer into him. She could feel him straining toward her. She reached to whisper in his ear. "And what he did to me." Another growl escaped his lips as he pulled off her pants. Pushing his boxers down, he plunged into her. She gasped and reached to pull his head down to her. He pumped up and down furiously inside her. She could tell he was close. "Come on," she licked her lips. "Take me. Make me yours." He buried his face in her neck and shouted as he filled her. Gasping for air, he held himself over her, searching her eyes. "You're mine," he said weakly. She nodded. He rolled beside her, pulling her into his chest. "I'm yours," she said softly. He kissed her forehead and she took him into her arms. "And you're mine." They fell asleep, smiling. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx FRIDAY NIGHT 10:07 PM Mulder was absolutely riveted to the "Creature from the Black Lagoon." At least, that's how he'd wanted it to look to Scully. He hadn't even looked up when she'd come in. She'd gone home to change first, and came over wearing a t-shirt and jeans. She fell onto the couch beside him, snatching a handful of popcorn. And waited. "Hello?" He didn't even look at her. "Hey." "Mulder, aren't you even going to ask how it went?" "How what went?" "My date." "Oh, was that tonight?" He turned back to his movie. Scully picked up the remote and turned the set off. "I was watching that," he complained. "Okay," he sighed. "How did it go?" "Well, he was a very nice guy...for someone else." She shook her head. "Not my type." Mulder nodded, then finally turned to her with a mischievous grin. "Good." He fell on top of her, pressing her back into the cushions. Popcorn spilled everywhere. He ran his fingers through her hair. "I missed you." She smiled and ran kisses along his chest. "I am so glad that's over." "Think your mom will set you up anymore?" Scully shut her eyes. "I didn't think about that." Mulder's hand had drifted down to her breast. "Tell her you're going to be a nun." Scully glared at him. "Not funny...ooohhh" "Tell her you're gay." "She'd set me up with women...aaahhh, Mulder." Scully reached down to pull off her t-shirt, but Mulder's large hands stopped her. He popped up from the couch. "Let's go Scully." He grinned down at her startled face and headed for the door. Scully sat up. "Go where, Mulder?" Mulder winked at her. "If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?" XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 12:01 am Roof of the J Edgar Hoover Building "Mulder, are we supposed to be up here?" He turned to her and held the door open. "Scully, we work here. You act like we're breaking and entering." "Whoa," Scully put a hand to her head. "Nosebleed." Mulder's face grew even paler than it had seemed in the silver moonlight. "What?" he whispered, choking on the word. Scully's face turned crimson. "Sorry. Bad joke. I just meant I wasn't used to being so high up in this building." She raised her eyebrows in a silent apology. Mulder exhaled. "Unless we're in trouble, huh?" He gave her a lopsided grin, and she felt exonerated. Scully walked over to peer over the ledge to the street below. "Speaking of trouble, what if we get caught up here?" She turned and leaned back against the low wall. Mulder advanced on her with a stern expression on his face. "What's the matter, Agent Scully? Afraid this will go down in your permanent record?" Scully smirked. "The only thing in my permanent record is a big picture of you that says, "Caution: May cause irrational behavior." Her partner thought for a second. "Yeah, there's a picture of me, but it says WANTED at the top in big black letters. For failure to complete expense reports on time. $10,000 reward." Scully reached to hook a finger in his belt loop, pulling his hips toward hers. "Oh, you're wanted, all right." Her voice was as low as the hum of the traffic from the city street below. She leaned into him, kissing him on the shoulder. Turning her head into his chest, she coiled her arms around his waist. "I love you," she said softly. Mulder kissed the top of her head, swaying gently with her in his arms. He loved it when she was like this. It made him feel so...normal. And turned on. He'd admit that. But it had been so unexpected. He'd never thought of Scully as a demonstrative person, but once the two of them got started they couldn't keep their hands off each other. "I love you, too," he said into her hair. "I can't tell you that enough." Scully breathed deeply and pulled back to look at him. She bit her lip as she reached up to touch his lips. Then she stood on her toes and kissed him, her tongue running along his teeth. Wrapping her arms around his neck to hold herself up, she opened her eyes. Mulder opened his too, somewhat reluctantly. "So," she asked, "What are we doing here?" Mulder flashed her a goofy grin. "Would you believe a slide show?" He let her go and walked over to the door where he'd left a red backpack. Kneeling to unzip it, he pulled out a bottle of champagne and two plastic goblets. Holding them up, he walked back to where she was standing. "Buy you a drink, miss?" He placed the cups on the wall, and popped the cork on the bottle. "I don't know," she said, taking a cup from him. "See, I have this boyfriend..." She looked over her shoulder nervously. "But does he make you happy?" She smiled. "Delirious." "Big guy?" Mulder played along. "About your height." He loved it when she played. She hadn't joked with him in so long. Mulder shrugged and flexed his arms. "I can take him". "He's armed," she warned, and dropped her voice to a whisper. "He works for the F-B-I." Mulder put an arm around her waist. "I'll take my chances." He smiled at her, then became serious. "Besides, you'd be worth fighting for." Scully kissed his neck, and ran a hand through his hair. "Y'know, I've actually had to use that line before. Some drunken moron in a bar." The wind whipped her hair into her face. "Usually they were gone by the time I got to the gun." "I remember being down in Georgetown once or twice...before" Mulder quickly added. He refilled their drinks. "And I don't ever want to do that again." Scully laughed and shook her head. "Me either." Mulder held up his glass. "To the end of the bar scene." Scully raised her eyebrows, asking silently if he realized what he was saying. His answering eyes reflected no fear, no regret, only reassurance. And love. Scully tapped her goblet against his. "Here, here." They both drank in silence for a moment. Mulder looked at her out of the corner of his eye, and took a deep breath. "Scully, if you did meet somebody, I wouldn't stand in your way." Scully put her hand on his, and turned to look into his eyes. "Mulder, there isn't going to *be* anyone else." He smiled. "You sure about that, *Dana*?" He shifted his feet and she looked down. "Cowboy boots, Mulder?" She sighed. "I *thought* you were taller tonight." "If you want I could go get some buck teeth," he drawled. She glared up at him. "He did *not* have buck teeth!" He grinned. "See, you were looking. I knew it." "You're impossible." She stared up at the night sky. "God, why do I love this man?" she shouted. Mulder put his arms around her waist and she leaned back into his chest. "Did he answer you?" he murmured in her hair. She shook her head. "I don't think there *is* any rational explanation for you, Mulder." His laugh rumbled in his chest and sent tremors through her body. "So, no more blind dates, right?" "No", Scully sighed. "I'll tell her something. I'm too busy, married to my work, yaddayaddayadda." Scully drained her glass. She tilted her head up to address his chin. "But you ditch me again, I'm eloping with the first sheriff I see." "Yee-haw!" Mulder laughed. "Hey, Scully." "Mmmm?" "Ever had sex on the roof of the FBI building?" Scully pretended to think. "You mean, today?" The End ************************AUTHOR'S NOTE**************** Please do not email me telling me that for security reasons they couldn't really be on the roof of the FBI building. That's why it's a. Any other feedback, though, would be lovely!