A spoiler for the "Fire Show."
Summary: Laverne and Shirley fight over a fireman named Ted after Laverne left the waffle iron in between her bed sheets.
On a cold and cocoa bound night
Laverne and Shirley were given a fright
Shirley would put between her sheet,
A waffle iron to warm her feet.
"But what about me?,"Laverne did say,
So Shirley gave in and Vernie got her way
Then a cold visitor knocked at the door,
Laverne said, "Get in here! What are you standing there for?"
His gloves stuck to the pizza box just like plaster,
"Carmine, in weather like this, you must get here faster."
The poor little guy was shaking like a leaf,
Laverne cuddled close and warmed him without grief.
Who should come from the bedroom with charm and grace,
Laverne's best friend and Carmine's Angelface.
She was shocked at the site and through out a line,
Her number one rule, "Never touch Carmine!"
Shirley yelled at Carmine with a light firm roar,
He then grabbed his hat and ran straight out the door.
"I swear, I swear the man was half froze!"
"I don't care if the man had icesicles hangin' off his nose!"
Shirley W. Feeney didn't even say thank you very much,
Instead she replied, "There are people you just don't touch."
With that thought in her head, they came through the door,
The girls were cold and couldn't take anymore.
Lenny and Squiggy were not out of focus,
Their apartment was just being sprayed for some locus.
Without being mean and without being gruff,
They asked if the girls would keep all their stuff.
"Not in our bedroom! Shirley shouted, getting all chokey,
"We don't wanna go in there anyway, it's too smokey."
The girls ran in and the boys were steady,
Squiggy then added, "Your waffle is ready."
The girls screamed, "Help! Fire!" and ran all about,
Laverne turned around and the boys had run out.
Laverne called the fire department and they were on their way,
She then turned to Shirley to see what she would say.
"I've got Boo Boo Kitty, Poo Poo Puppy, and the Feeney Family Album."
A handsome tall fireman came out of their room,
His charms would cause the girls to swoon.
Ted Nelson..Fireman, was truely unfailable,
Laverne gave her name and said she was available.
He told them that the fire hazzards were not as great,
Shirley blamed them on Laverne, but by then it was too late.
They fought and they pushed to brutally compete,
When Shirley got too close, she was tossed off her feet.
He offered his assistance to teach the fire safety rules,
But the only thing Laverne could do was look at him and drool.
Biting, Pinching, pulling, tossing, to get the man who fights the fire,
"My nickname is Wilhelmina!" said Laverne who was the liar.
Ted hugged them both and said farewell because his scene was done,
They'd gather all the tenants and Ted would see the girls at one.
They would have fought all night if Laverne hadn't broken the fetter,
"Tomorrow when Ted comes, let him pick which one of us he likes better."
In their apartment, that very next day,
The tenants all listened to what Ted had to say.
He asked for some help and oh what a treat,
Laverne and Shirley jumped to their feet.
"Who died and made you fire distinguisher?" Shirley did say,
Laverne lost control and her father she did spray.
"I'm so sorry, Pop!" She said to her father covered in foam,
When asked where he was going, he replied, "Home."
Shirley approached Ted with a bountiful gleam,
She merely suggested that they use whipped cream.