ACT 1
Scene 1
[Scene opens in an apartment setting. To stage right is the kitchen area with a refrigerator and a dining room table. Center stage is a worn in couch facing slightly towards stage left. On the left side of the stage is a television with the screen facing away from the audience. The apartment has a few chairs and a few pictures but is mostly stark in decorations. However, the apartment looks very lived in with clothes strung about and dirty dishes and newspapers on the kitchen table. In the upper left hand corner of the stage is a desk with a phone, a dictionary, a few notebooks and papers strewn about. Pushed into the desk is a chair that squeaks every time it is sat in. Above the desk is a shelf with a variety of books from textbooks to romance novels. Sandy and Martin are both lying on the couch in a spoon position with Martin lying behind Sandy. Martin has his arm around her waist and they are both intently watching the television.]
Martin: Now tell me, if you were to ever cheat on me would you bring me on a show like this to break the news?
Sandy: Don’t be silly Martin, I’d never cheat on you.
Martin: That wasn’t the question. I asked IF you ever DID cheat on me, if you would put me on some national television show to break my heart in front of millions of people.
Sandy: [gets up and goes to the kitchen] I hardly doubt that my cheating on you would break your heart. If your heart was broken on national television it would probably be because you’d be embarrassed that you hadn’t done it first and now everyone in the country would know you couldn’t pull the “I broke up with her” line that you’re so famous for. [Opens the refrigerator and grabs a coke] You want anything?
Martin: [Sitting up] I’m shocked. You honestly think I’d be more hurt at my bruised ego than at losing you?
Sandy: [Blatantly] Yes.
Martin: [Walks to Sandy. Wraps her in his arms.] Sandy, I don’t know what I’d do without you. You are my life. Listen, I’d rather have a bruised ego any day if it meant that I’d have you to console it all night long.
Sandy: [Pulls away and goes back to the couch] How did I know you’d relate this to sex?
Martin: [Follows her behind couch] What do you mean?
Sandy: Well my word Martin that’s all you ever reference to is sex. “I don’t mind having a horrid ego just so long as you’re with me at night” Translation: Just so long as I’m getting some. For once I’d just like to hear you say that I, without the sex, am good enough for you; that you’d be happy to be with me, just because I’m me.
Martin: Sandy, please, I hate it when you’re like this. You know that I love you. You know that I’m with you for you.
Sandy: [Sarcastically] Yeah, right, of course I know.
Martin: The sex is just an added bonus that I happen to enjoy.
Sandy: Right. Look, do you mind if we don’t talk about this? The commercial’s almost over and I don’t want to miss his reaction when she drops the bombshell.
Martin: Why do you always do that?
Sandy: Do what?
Martin: What do you mean “do what?” You know…
Sandy: Shhh… It’s on, save whatever you have to say until the shows over will you?
Martin: Fine. [Walks over to desk and starts fumbling nosily through papers.][To himself] Come on. Where are you? I know I put you somewhere. Ah ha! There you are! [Pulls out a piece of paper with phone numbers on it. Sits in desk chair.] Rick Hanley. [Pretends to dial] 555-1834. Hey Rick. Yes, It’s Martin. Look, I seem to have a bit of a problem. Sandy has left me for a talk show host.
[Sandy looks at him and motions for him to be quiet.]
Martin: Yes, can you believe it? After all these months I’ve been so devoted to her she sits in front of the television putting him before me. Oh well, I knew our romance had to end sometime, I just didn’t think it would have to be now. And I didn’t think it would be to one of the sleaziest men on television.
[Irritated Sandy gets up, turns off the television and walks over to Martin]
Sandy: Look. You have my attention. What’s up?
Martin: Do you mind? I’m talking with Rick right now.
Sandy: Why do I not believe you? [Takes phone from Martin and puts the receiver up to her ear] Just what I thought. [Hangs up phone]
Martin: You’re not falling for the “I’m talking to Rick” routine anymore, are you?
Sandy: I never did. [Uncomfortable pause] Look, I’m just tired of you relating everything to sex, alright?
Martin: I’m sorry if you don’t find sex as important as I do. I think it’s an integral component to a healthy relationship.
Sandy: I’m not saying it isn’t hun, I’m just saying that I don’t want it to be the subject of all conversation, alright?
Martin: Fine. My problem is that I don’t… wait, never mind.
Sandy: Never mind? Don’t “never mind” me Martin. What were you going to say?
Martin: Nothing, it’ll just make the situation worse.
Sandy: Martin please, what were you going to say. I need to know.
Martin: [snickers] You NEED to know? Are you saying that your livelihood is dependent on whether or not I tell you what I was going to say?
Sandy: You know what I mean. If you want this relationship to work you’re going to have to tell me everything. You can’t “never mind.”
Martin: [Takes her hand] Sandy love, relationships aren’t built on saying everything, but on knowing what needs to NOT be said. Now, trust me, this is something that doesn’t need to be said.
Sandy: [Pulls hand away and goes back to couch] Fine, just fine. You be like that. When you’re ready to grow up and have a real relationship with me just make sure that you catch me at a commercial break, alright?
Martin: [Gets off of chair and walks into kitchen area] You wouldn’t know a real relationship if it jumped up and bit you in the rear end.
Sandy: I beg your pardon?
Martin: Nothing.
Sandy: Look. Why can’t we just have a happy afternoon with no fighting or grumbling? Other couples can be happy. Why can’t we? I’d LOVE to be one of those couples that have no problems, but unfortunately they plague us.
Martin: [Laughs] I’d like to see one of these couples with “no problems.” They probably live in the middle of no where, with no t.v., wear Amish clothes and make their own soap. No thank you, I’d rather have a few problems than live a life of self-sacrifice.
Sandy: You’re too over dramatic and presumptuous. I’m not saying that every couple is perfect, it’s just that some couples seem to be perfect for each other. I’d just love to be able to come home and have you understand me for once. To be able to get where I’m coming from. But you can’t seem to do that. It’s like we’re at opposite ends of the universe.
Martin: [Kisses the top of her head] You’re adorable when you’re so philosophical and needy. That’s one of the things that attracted me to you in the first place.
Sandy: Needy? Needy? [Gets up] This is exactly what I’m saying! You don’t know ANYTHING about me! If you did you would realize that this is not just “need,” this is something more than that!
Martin: What is more than need?
Sandy: [Exasperated] I don’t know. Desire. Passion. Intimacy.
Martin: And you’re saying I’M the one who always brings up sex.
Sandy: [Sits in desk chair] I’m not talking about sex. And if you knew anything about me, you’d KNOW that I wasn’t talking about sex at all.
Martin: Then what are you talking about?
Sandy: Love. Pure and simple love.
Martin: If love were that pure and simple every one would be racing to get some.
Sandy: See, you don’t understand!
Martin: Hunny, I do love you! Why can’t you see that? I work all day so you can go to one of the finest universities in the United States. I bought us this apartment. I pay for everything. What more do you want?
Sandy: [Gets up and sits over at kitchen table to get away from Martin] [Obviously disappointed] Nothing hun. I’ve got the world. A man and a kitchen. What more could I ask for except to have a baby on the way?
Martin: [Rushes over to her] Don’t you even dare think that thought! You know I don’t want a kid until after we get married.
Sandy: That was sarcasm Martin. I don’t want a kid. I was just making a reference. Obviously you didn’t get it.
Martin: Obviously. But look, really, you have everything that a girl could want. I provide you with everything. I’d at least like to know once in a while that what I do for you is appreciated. That I’m not doing these things for you in vain. Do you understand what I’m saying?
Sandy: Yes, I understand.
Martin: Good.
[Uncomfortable pause]
Sandy: What do you want for dinner?
Martin: Whatever you feel like making.
Sandy: Well, honestly, I don’t feel like cooking.
Martin: I’m not surprised.
Sandy: I’ll make you something if you’d like me to. If you don’t have any ideas though I’m not gonna make anything. You know how much I hate cooking. Aside from the fact that I have to start studying for a test in Anatomy tomorrow. That thing is going to eat me for lunch.
Martin: Didn’t you just have a test in there?
Sandy: No, I had a test in Physiology.
Martin: Well, it’s all the same thing. Anyway, since you have to study why don’t we just order in some Chinese and be done with it, alright?
Sandy: That sounds great. I’m gonna get my books and you can order. You know what I like. [Kisses him]
Martin: Alright hun.
[Sandy goes into bedroom. Martin flips through phonebook and finally finds number.]
Martin: Yes, hello, this is Martin Landfair. Yes, I’d like two orders of Sweet and Sour Chicken and a side order of Chow Mien. Uh huh. 560 Delaware St. Apt. #315. Alright, thank you. [Hangs up phone and sits on couch.]
[Sandy reenters with a huge textbook, a spiral binder, a pen and pencil bag and a large three ring binder. She clears herself off an area on the desk and starts to study.]
Martin: Hey Sandy. I really did talk to Rick today.
Sandy: [Preoccupied] Oh?
Martin: Yes. He was saying how big Melinda is getting. Doesn’t it seem like days since she was born? I can’t believe she’s almost two years old.
Sandy: Yes, can’t believe it.
Martin: Rick was saying that him and Elizabeth found themselves a nice little town house in the north part of town that is just perfect for their little family.
Sandy: Uh huh.
Martin: [Notices that Sandy isn’t paying attention to him.] Yes, he said the only bad thing is that a gang of wild bandits also lives there with him and he has to give each of them full body massages every night. Which isn’t bad in itself except for the fact that they all have athlete’s foot.
Sandy: [Not even noticing] Oh yeah?
Martin: Yes, but I told him not to worry. There’s nothing that a full body dip in a tub of tapioca pudding wouldn’t do to solve their problem.
Sandy: [Looks up] Martin hun?
Martin: Yes dear?
Sandy: Do me a favor.
Martin: Anything.
Sandy: Shut up. I’m trying to study.
Martin: [Slightly offended] Fine. [To himself] My God.
Sandy: Language.
Martin: Why is it that I can ramble hours long with incessant crap, but the moment I say “God” your radar turns on like a duck bouncing on a June bug?
Sandy: Possibly because I’m only tuned to hear one word: “God” It’s similar to your one word radar: “Sex.”
Martin: Now that was uncalled for Sandy.
Sandy: Look, I’m sorry. But please, I really need to study.
Martin: You’re right baby. Alright, I’ll let you study. [Blows her a kiss]
Sandy: My goodness, you change moods faster than a woman does some times.
Martin: Well, your education is important. Besides, I’ve got some talk shows to catch up on.
Sandy: [Engrossed in her studying already] Fine.
[Martin turns on the television. A series of commercial plays that Martin laughs at.]
Martin: [To himself, but loud enough to purposely annoy Sandy] Well, I’ll say, I’ve never seen a box of Cracklin’ Boat Oats go that long before getting soggy. Hmmm… Hurling Burger has a new special. Oh wow. That looks tasty. Oh, wait. Comes with Barbecue Sauce, I can’t stand Barbecue Sauce. [Flips channels] Oh wow! The discovery channel is having a special 24 hour marathon showing the life history of the fruit fly. Sweetie, you should see this, it’s amazing.
Sandy: [Having been irritated all through his talking] Martin.
Martin: Come look at this hunny, it’s amazing. After only about 12 hours these little guys are ready to get it on. Can you imagine how much sex they could have being willing and able to reproduce at such a young age?
Sandy: Martin.
Martin: Just get over here and look at this. My word, if I could reproduce at that age, [laughs] I’d probably have fathered an entire third world country by now.
Sandy: Martin!
Martin: What? There’s no need to yell.
Sandy: My goodness, do you have any respect at all for the educational system?
Martin: Of course I do. I was letting you study.
Sandy: Oh were you? I seem to have missed that in your discourse on about how you wished you were a fly.
Martin: Not just any fly Sandy. A fruit fly.
Sandy: [Rolls eyes] Whatever. Look, the point is that I have a test tomorrow and I need to study. You’re talking is preventing me from doing so.
Martin: Well, I didn’t realize that you needed absolute quiet princess.
[Door bell rings]
Martin: Must be the Chinese.
[Martin opens the door and a teenager is standing there with three boxes of Chinese food.]
Delivery Man: That’ll be $11.87
Martin: [Pulls out his wallet and gives the Delivery Man a ten and a five] Keep the change.
[Martin closes door. Takes the food to the dining room table. Gets out two plates and starts to serve up the Chinese. All the time he is doing this he is humming some unrecognizable song underneath his breath. It’s obviously not making Sandy very happy, but she tries to fight off annoyance. When he is done serving he takes a plate over to Sandy and puts it on top of her book.]
Martin: For you my princess.
Sandy: I’m not hungry.
Martin: What?
Sandy: I’m not hungry.
Martin: But you were just hungry a few minutes ago. What changed?
Sandy: We did.
Martin: Well, last time I checked our relationship changing doesn’t cause the stomach to forget that it’s hungry. Besides [Kisses the top of her head] what has changed? I still love you, that’s all that matters.
Sandy: Of course you wouldn’t notice.
Martin: Notice what?
Sandy: The change!
Martin: [Getting defensive] What change Sandy?
Sandy: [Slams book shut, gathers up papers and marches into the bedroom] Nothing Martin, absolutely nothing. Forget I even said a thing.
Martin: No, if it’s getting you that upset I want to know what the problem is.
Sandy: [Yelling from the bedroom] No, it’s nothing Martin.
Martin: If it was nothing then you wouldn’t be upset. Now tell me Sandy.
Sandy: [Comes back from bedroom] You honestly don’t know?
Martin: Would we be having this conversation if I did?
Sandy: With your ignorance? Probably.
Martin: Not even slightly funny Sandy.
Sandy: I wasn’t trying to be.
Martin: Sandy, please, tell me what’s wrong.
Sandy: Martin, the key in relationships is not in saying everything, but knowing what NOT to say.
Martin: Don’t use my own words against me now. That was different.
Sandy: And how is it different?
Martin: I wasn’t angry with that, thus it didn’t really need to be said. You seem to be fuming; thus I think I have a right to know.
Sandy: [Sits on couch] If you don’t know what I’m mad about already then that’s just more of a reason for me to be mad.
Martin: Sandy, look, if you tell me what bothered you in the first place, then we can try to fix it. As it is, if you don’t tell me, then you’re not only going to be mad for what happened, but doubly mad because I don’t know what happened. That’s pointless and futile. So, please Sandy; just tell me what’s bothering you.
Sandy: [Rubs temples] Forget it Martin. I don’t even remember what I was angry about.
Martin: Well, alright. [Kisses her check then goes and gets the food.] You want something to drink with this?
Sandy: OH! Now I remember!
Martin: That was quick.
Sandy: I was mad because you have absolutely no respect for me.
Martin: That’s preposterous!
Sandy: And why is that so preposterous? Why do you think everything I say is so “preposterous”?
Martin: It’s not everything you say Sandy. I’m just saying that seeing that I know me, and I know how I feel about you, that I know that I respect you.
Sandy: Then why don’t you show it if you respect me so much?
Martin: I DO!
Sandy: HA! I’d love to see the day Martin.
Martin: How can you possibly say that I don’t?
Sandy: Easy, I open my mouth and the words flow out.
Martin: Don’t be coy, you know what I mean.
Sandy: Well, let’s look at the events of today for example. All I want to do is study. That’s it! And you come in here interrupting me, talking loud to the tv, and then even after I called you on both of those you still whistle and hum and makes all sorts of noise all over the kitchen, when you KNOW I’m trying to study!
Martin: So let me get this straight, you’re mad because I was humming?
Sandy: No, I’m mad because you have no respect for me.
Martin: What? You said you were mad because I was making noise. How in the world do you relate that to me not having respect for you?
Sandy: Do I have to spell everything out for you?
Martin: Apparently.
Sandy: Yes, apparently.
[Brief pause]
Martin: Well?
Sandy: Well what?
Martin: Are you going to?
Sandy: Going to what?
Martin: Spell it out for me!
Sandy: No, I think I’ll let you figure it out for yourself. Until then, I need to study.
Martin: My God Sandy.
[Sandy gives him an evil look.]
Martin: Fine, my goodness, you have to be one of the most fickle people I know. Look, I’m hungry, the food is getting cold and so is this conversation. You just study and when you’re done I’d be more than happy to have a civilized conversation with you. I’ll keep quiet. I’ll go get my book and read here. Yeah, I haven’t read in a long time, it’ll do me some good.
Sandy: Thank you, I appreciate that.
[Sandy goes into the bedroom to get her books. Martin sits down on the couch with his food, takes a few bites which obviously are less than tasty. He is throwing the food in the trash when Sandy returns to the room with her studying material.]
Sandy: Not as good as usual?
Martin: I think they forgot to cook it.
Sandy: Where did you get it from?
Martin: The usual.
Sandy: My usual or your usual?
Martin: Mine.
Sandy: Well that would explain it.
Martin: What do you mean?
Sandy: That place wouldn’t know good Chinese if it were shoved under their noses.
Martin: Well fine, next time you can order.
Sandy: Well fine, next time I will.
[Sandy goes over to the desk and resumes her studying position. Martin rummages through the refrigerator aimlessly and finally closes the door obviously disappointed that there is nothing appealing to him in it. Martin then walks up behind Sandy and is eyeing the book selection. Eventually he chooses a small book with the title “Confessions” on it. Martin sits on the couch and starts reading. He lip-reads everything in a barely audible voice. Sandy starts tapping her pencil on the desk. Martin starts patting his leg in rhythm to Sandy’s pencil tap. A few seconds of this goes on.]
Sandy: I can’t do this.
Martin: I’m reading.
Sandy: I know, stop it.
Martin: I can’t talk, I can’t watch t.v., I can’t read. What can I do?
Sandy: You can leave, please. This is too much; my studying is not going to work with you in the house.
Martin: We’ve done it before.
Sandy: I realize that Martin. But look, for some reason today is just NOT a good day for you and I to be together, alright?
Martin: [Walks up behind Sandy and puts his arms around her neck.] Hunny, I want to do everything in my power to make sure that your studying goes all right. I’ll do anything, just tell me what.
Sandy: Leave.
Martin: Okay, I’m gone.
Sandy: Thank you.
Martin: But before I leave, could you please tell me why you think I have no respect for you. I think I treat you like a princess, I just don’t understand.
Sandy: [Turns around in her chair.] Martin, it’s not the way you treat me per se, it’s more the way you envision me. It’s like you think that because you are providing everything materially for me that I don’t need anything else. That I’ll be happy with an apartment and a man. I’m just not like that Martin. I need more than that.
Martin: [Kneels down intent in what she’s saying.] What Sandy? What more can I give you?
Sandy: I just don’t know Martin. But if I tell you what it is it seems that it won’t even be worth having.
[Martin looks confused.]
Sandy: I know, I know, I’m not making sense. But trust me, when you give me what I need I’ll know. Until then it’s almost like our relationship is pointless.
Martin: Pointless? You’re saying that everything we’ve been through is pointless? That our love is pointless?
Sandy: [Wraps hands around Martin’s head.] Martin, I’m not saying anything of the sort. It seems to me that we’re at an impasse in our relationship. We either decide to move on with our lives or you start to give me something that I need.
Martin: Sandy, I can’t believe my ears. Are you ending it?
Sandy: No, I’m doing nothing of the sort. I’m just putting the problem out in the air.
Martin: Out in the air? I didn’t even know it wasn’t in the air to be put there. All this is news to me.
Sandy: I realize that Martin. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have even brought it up.
Martin: You’re right, you shouldn’t have.
[Martin starts to stand up and Sandy pulls him down.]
Martin: What is it?
Sandy: Don’t leave me.
Martin: What?
Sandy: Don’t leave me.
Martin: You want me to leave, remember? You have to study.
Sandy: Oh, yeah, right.
Martin: Sandy love, please, get your studying done and then go to bed. You need it.
Sandy: Yes, you’re right, I do.
Martin: All right hun, I’ll see you in a few hours.
[Martin starts to pull himself up again and Sandy pulls him down once more.]
Sandy: Promise me you’ll come back.
Martin: You don’t have to worry. I’ll always come back.
Sandy: Good. [Attempts a weak smile.]
[Martin tries to pull himself up once more, and again Sandy pulls him down.]
Martin: I’m never gonna leave if you keep pulling me down here to you.
[Sandy just stares at Martin.]
Martin: Sandy?
[After a few long seconds Sandy grabs Martin and kisses him passionately.]
Martin: [Wiping his mouth in shock.] What was that for?
Sandy: I just wanted to make sure.
Martin: Sure of?
Sandy: That you would come back.
Martin: And?
Sandy: I’ll see you later.
Martin: [Stands up] I love you too.
[Martin goes into the bedroom and gets his coat. Sandy returns to her studying as Martin walks out the door giving Sandy one last glance before leaving.]
Sandy: Yes, I know.
[Blackout. End of Scene 1]
Scene 2
[Scene opens with Sandy in the same position we left her in the last scene. There are papers scattered all over the floor. A mug sits on her desk and a pot of coffee sits in the kitchen with about two cups left in it. Sandy looks frazzled, stressed and extremely tired. After a few moments of seeing Sandy in this state Martin enters. After shutting the door he awaits a response from Sandy.]
Martin: Hello Sandy.
[No response.]
Martin: Still studying I see.
Sandy: Yes.
[A long pause as Martin just stands and watches Sandy study.]
Martin: I did some thinking while I was out.
Sandy: Oh?
Martin: Yes, and if you’d like to talk about it after you’re done studying I would really appreciate it.
Sandy: I’m almost ready for a break. Give me a second to finish up this page.
Martin: All right.
[Martin walks into the bedroom and returns without his coat. Sandy closes book and turns around in the chair. She leans back causing the chair to squeak.]
Martin: We really need to fix that chair.
Sandy: Yes, I suppose so.
Martin: I’ll see if I can pick up some WD-40 on my way home from work tomorrow.
Sandy: Okay.
Martin: [Sitting down on the couch.] Have a seat Sandy.
Sandy: [Sits where he led her to sit.] Yes?
Martin: Well, I don’t know where to start.
Sandy: Okay, how about starting with where you went.
Martin: You’re right, that would be a good place to start.
Sandy: I thought so.
Martin: When I first left I wasn’t sure where I was going to go. I was mad and frustrated, so I just got in my car and started driving. An hour later I found myself in the middle of an open field just outside of the city. The sun hadn’t set yet so I sat in my car, had it facing to the west and watched as the sun set over the cornfields. I started thinking about the times when we first started dating. When we would go up to Six Mile Hill and watch the sun set just about every night.
Sandy: Yes, I remember those times vividly.
Martin: And I started wondering what has changed since those days when we would park and watch the sky, wrapped up in each other’s eyes like newfound lovers. It wasn’t like there was an actual point when we stopped, it just seems like a steady progression.
[Sandy nods.]
Martin: The more I thought about it the more it confused me. When was the moment when we stopped trying to please each other? When was the moment when we stopped putting our best foot forward? When did we decide that just being around each other was enough, instead of being with each other? As I stared at the sun setting I couldn’t help but think that it was your fault.
Sandy: What?
Martin: Just hear me out, please.
Sandy: [Raised eyebrow.] Okay.
Martin: I kept thinking that it was your fault because you had allowed me to get so callused to you. You hadn’t spoken up when you felt like I was treating you bad. I realized that today was just a breaking point for you. Am I right?
Sandy: Yes, it wasn’t that I hadn’t felt like I did today before, it’s just that today you broke the proverbial camel’s back.
Martin: I’m sorry about that hun.
Sandy: Don’t be, it’s forgotten.
Martin: But then I realized that I couldn’t blame you. That there was no one else to blame except myself. I had let myself become too comfortable with you.
Sandy: There’s nothing wrong with comfortable.
Martin: Yes, but it was the wrong kind of comfortable. It wasn’t the comfortable “I can tell you anything and not feel ashamed” comfortable. It was more the “I can be around you and not feel bad not telling you everything because I know you still love me” comfortable.
Sandy: I’m not sure I understand. I thought you could tell me everything.
Martin: That’s just it, I CAN tell you everything. But the level of comfortability we’re at makes it so that even though I can tell you everything I don’t because I’m comfortable not letting you know everything. Do you understand what I’m saying?
Sandy: Vaguely.
Martin: I know, it’s hard for me to explain.
Sandy: I can tell.
Martin: What I can’t get out of my mind is that kiss. You’ve never kissed me like that before. It almost felt like a woman kissing her husband good-bye as he left for war, not knowing if he’d come back or not. Does that make sense?
Sandy: Yes.
Martin: Why? Why did you kiss me like that?
Sandy: I was scared.
Martin: Of what?
Sandy: [Long pause.] I don’t want to talk about it.
Martin: No, please, we need to talk about this.
Sandy: I was afraid that when you walked out that door you would realize the mistake that we’ve made and not ever want to come home to me again. I was afraid of losing you. I was afraid you’d realized how dependent I am on you and want to get away before you felt smothered.
Martin: Sandy, I don’t ever consider us a mistake. I don’t want to consider us a mistake. [Takes her hand.] Sandy, you are one of the most important people in my life. But for some reason I’ve become blinded by the fact that you’re always here. I’ve taken for granted the fact that you are beside me when I wake up, instead of cherishing the fact that you’re the first face I see in the morning.
[Sandy starts to cry.]
Martin: I want to make sure that what ever happens, what ever stress or trials come our way that we will not only be able to handle them but be able to love each other through them. [Notices a tear falling from Sandy’s face and wipes it with his hand.] Oh Sandy, please don’t cry.
Sandy: I’m not crying.
Martin: Then what do you call this wet stuff?
Sandy: I must have gotten something in my eyes.
Martin: [Chuckles] You are adorable.
[Martin bends over and kisses Sandy’s cheek where the tear rolled down. Then he kisses the other check slowly. Eventually he makes his way down to her lips. After a short kiss Sandy breaks away and throws her arms around Martin’s neck.]
Sandy: I missed you.
Martin: [Pulls back.] Missed me? I was only gone for a few hours.
Sandy: You may have only been gone a few hours tonight, but I’ve missed you for a long time.
Martin: [Pulls Sandy to him again.] I’m so sorry Sandy.
[They stay in this embraced position for a few moments.]
Martin: So, do you still have more studying to do?
Sandy: Yes, all I need to do know is just review. Basically I’m done though.
Martin: Can I do anything to help you?
Sandy: Well, I could use some help from a live model.
Martin: [Smiles] I think I could help you with that.
Sandy: [Getting up] That would be great. You stand here. [Points to a position behind the chair of the desk.]
Martin: Here?
Sandy: Good enough.
Martin: [In good spirits now] Well, I aim to please, put me where you like. [Stretches arms out to indicate that he is at her disposal.]
Sandy: Okay, well, I’m studying the muscles right now.
Martin: [Flexes his biceps.] Well, I happen to have a few of those.
Sandy: [Giggles.] Yes, but medical science just hasn’t been able to identify them they’re so small.
Martin: Hardy-har-har, aren’t you the comedian?
Sandy: Of course I am. I’ve always said that I have the humor in our relationship.
Martin: Well, Miss Future Nurse, let’s get this human modeling on the road.
Sandy: Alright, let’s start with the bottom and work our way up.
Martin: Works for me.
Sandy: [Pointing to Martin’s calf] This muscle back here is called you Gastronemius.
Martin: Otherwise know as the calf.
Sandy: Yes, but laymen’s terms won’t help me on my exam.
Martin: [Laughs.] Okay, carry on Nurse.
Sandy: Moving up the front of the leg is the Tibialis Anterior. Farther up we come to the Quadriceps. The four muscles making up the quadriceps are the Sartorius, the Rectus Femoris, the Abductor Longus and the Gracilis. [Moves hands up Martin’s legs to his abdomen.]
Martin: Mmmm… I’m really beginning to like this modeling business. The perks are wonderful.
Sandy: Shh… You’re not helping.
Martin: [Grinning.] Sorry.
Sandy: These muscles here are called your Rectus Abdominis. To the sides are the Oblique Extrenus Abdominis. [Moves hands up to Martin’s chest, staring him in the eye.] And these are your Pectoralis major and minor.
[Sandy runs her hands up Martin’s neck and Martin brings his hands around her waist.]
Sandy: These muscles here are your Trapezius, and these are your Platysma.
[Martin leans in closer to Sandy. Sandy moves her right hand up to Martin’s face circling the area around his mouth with her thumb. Sandy doesn’t immediately say anything.]
Martin: And that muscle is?
Sandy: What?
Martin: The muscle.
Sandy: Oh yes, right. This muscle is the Orbicularis… [Martin leans in quickly and kisses Sandy.] The Orbicularis… [Another kiss.]
[The name of the muscle never comes out as they wrap each other up in their arms and begin to passionately kiss. Sandy starts to undo his shirt as the curtain closes.]
ACT II
Scene 1
[The scene opens with Sandy standing in the kitchen with the refrigerator open obviously looking for something. She is wearing a lacy two piece nightgown covered over with a robe. The robe is tied. While she is bent over looking Martin comes in dressed in a suit and tie whistling merrily. He pats Sandy on the butt.]
Sandy: Oh! Good morning to you too.
Martin: Whatcha looking for sexy?
Sandy: I was just seeing what we have. Anything special you’d like for breakfast.
Martin: [Kisses her should.] Well…
Sandy: Food I mean.
Martin: Ah, cereal is good enough for me.
Sandy: Good, because that’s about all we have.
Martin: Oh, well in that case I’d like some eggs benedict, 3 pieces of toast, hashbrowns, French toast and some Belgium waffles.
Sandy: Then you better plan on going somewhere else Mister, this place only serves cereal and milk.
Martin: Then cereal and milk sounds fine.
Sandy: I thought it might.
Martin: Did the paper come this morning.
Sandy: Doesn’t it always?
Martin: [Laughs.] Where is it?
Sandy: It’s hiding.
Martin: Well, it better unhide itself so that I can read it.
Sandy: Why don’t you try your chair.
Martin: Well, I think I just might.
[Pulls chair out from under table where the newspaper is waiting for him.]
Martin: There you are you sneaky paper. That paperboy is getting good, aiming directly for the chair.
Sandy: Isn’t he though?
[Having finished fixing two bowls of cereal she hands him his bowl and sits down at the table with him. They sit in silence for a few moments while Sandy eats and Martin read his paper.]
Sandy: So, what’s happening in the world today.
Martin: Oh not much, another riot in Central Park. This one was pretty bad apparently. Couple people killed, women raped, the usual it sounds like.
Sandy: The usual? My goodness you’re insensitive.
Martin: If I am so it’s because the news makes me that way.
To be Continued.