THE FELLIP NECTAR STAND Edition 2.3 Down Time
Author: LeatherGirl
Disclaimer: I do not own Farscape or anything associated with Farscape so help me God.
This edition is dedicated to my longtime friend and companion who recently died after a long happy life as a farm cat. (To keep her anonymity in this edition, I have given her an alias.)
*****
[The hot tub is steaming and bubbling soothing hot water in the center of the stand. DRDs are situated in a large circle on top of several tables surrounding the hot tub. They are glowing in a low luminance as romantic as candles. Only a few customers are at the bar this evening. Our favorite Farscape characters are relaxing comfortably in the hot tub. A large orange cat with a crooked tail, a slight limp, and a clipped right ear hops onto the edge of the hot tub and sniffs the air curiously.]
Flip: “Meow!”
Rygel: “AUGH!!” [Swims over to opposite side of tub.] “Get it away from me! It’s most likely a deadly creature sent by my cousin to kill me! Help!”
Zhaan: [Laughs.] “Rygel, it looks harmless. In fact, I think she’s just curious.”
John’s Mind: [Floating on water near Aeryn’s Soul.] “What’s the matter Ryge? Afraid of a soft, cuddly little kitty cat?” [Laughs and floats over to cat. The cat leans over water and pats John’s Mind with her paw playfully.] “Hey! Watch it!”
Aeryn’s Soul: “What a sorry looking creature. Do they all look like that? And what are you doing anyway, John? I thought you hated critters.”
D’Argo: [With arm around Chiana. Sniffles.] “How did that thing get here and what does it want?” [Sneezes and Chiana veers away in disgust as bubbles arise in water near D’Argo.] “Frell, I’m allergic to it.”
Stark: [Leans towards cat curiously.] “Strange. I’ve seen these before somewhere. They were much larger and had bigger teeth.”
Chiana: [Glances over at Jothee during conversation and shares a secret smile.] “I’m bored.”
Zhaan: “Dear child! You must learn the virtues of meditation and relaxation. It’s not often we get a break from our weekly near misses and dangerous missions.”
[John’s Mind begins to play with Flip while Jothee orders more drinks for everyone. D’Argo sneezes horribly once again.]
Aeryn’s Soul: [Smiles at the bonding between John’s Mind and Flip.] “Whoever invented this ‘hot basin’ has to be one of your goddesses, Zhaan. I do love it. But I still think it needs some sort of defense mechanism attached to it.” [Receives looks of sarcasm.] “Look, we’re all in our underwear…well, most of us…” [Eyes Zhaan with disgust but only receives a smile back.] “…What if an enemy were to enter and attack? We need to be prepared.” [Charges her waterproof pulse pistol just to make her point.]
Chiana: “How do you handle the heat in here, Aeryn? I thought you were a PeaceKeeper…remember the Living Death?”
Aeryn’s Soul: [Snaps at Chiana.] “I’m just a soul, remember? I can handle it!”
D’Argo: [Sneezes as voice begins to change with his stuffy nose.] “No fighting!” [Under breath.] “Frelling women.”
Zhaan: “Calm down D’Argo.” [Glances around stand.] “Does anyone know where Pilot and Moya are? They were supposed to meet us arns ago.”
Rygel: “Maybe that…that creature attacked them on the way here!” [Throws a food cube at Flip. To his amazement and everyone else’s, Flip catches the food cube with her claw and proceeds to eat it from her paw.]
Stark: “Even stranger. It likes food cubes.”
John’s Mind: “Just like Meow Mix, I bet!”
Jothee: “Meow Mix? I know I’m young and everything but I know that’s not real.”
John’s Mind: [Floats slightly towards Jothee. Jothee veers back…everyone is slightly freaked out by this floating mind thing.] “Hey! Leave Flip alone, okay?” [John’s Mind turns and heads back.] “Flip! Flip? Over here! Good kitty.”
D’Argo: [Sneezes. More bubbles arise. This time Chiana has had enough and she joins Jothee on the other side of the tub to D’Argo’s dismay.] “Aeryn, when are you going to return my Qualta Blade? It’s probably rusting by now.”
Aeryn’s Soul: “Patience, D’Argo. Patience.”
Zhaan: “Perhaps we should all meditate to relieve our stresses and contemplate on why we are all here.” [All turn to Zhaan, bewildered.] “Or we could order another round of Raslac. Bartender! More Raslac please!”
Jothee: [Pets Flip as Flip and John’s Mind play cat and mouse with each other.] “It’s such a cute creature. And so soft!”
Flip: [Purrs extremely loudly…almost like a pigeon. Begins to do back flips and other tricks like standing up on tail only to capture the groups’ attention.] “Meow!”
Stark: “Is that all she can say?”
Zhaan: “Yes, why don’t the translator microbes work?”
John’s Mind: “Cats meow. They say it in different tones and move their tails, ears, and whiskers to communicate. Gees, I thought you guys would understand this stuff.”
Rygel: “How do you know so much about this creature? Are you two in on something we don’t know about?”
D’Argo: “Probably an Erp creature. A wormhole brought her straight to the stand to annoy me and make me sick.” [Sneezes horribly.]
Flip: “Meow!” [Plays more tricks and jumps around the edge of the hot tub. At one point, Flip jumps over the tub, does a triple back flip, and lands on Aeryn’s Soul’s head. Aeryn’s Soul is not amused and brushes the cat off. Flip lands on the beside her and rubs against her affectionately.]
John’s Mind: “That’s so cute, Aeryn. She likes you. I can’t believe she actually likes you!” [Receives glare from Aeryn’s Soul.]
Chiana: [Smiles at cat.] “Maybe she would like to join us in the water.”
John’s Mind: “Are you crazy!!! Cats hate water!”
Flip: “I don’t mind if I do.”
[Farscape characters glance from one to the other and notice John’s Mind is just as freaked out by this. Rygel is temporarily stuck and Flip rubs against him. Rygel nearly faints but frees himself and joins the others in a mad dash for the door. They don’t seem to mind that they are all in their underwear and nakedness. Flip jumps into the hot tub, swims around and smiles.]
Flip: “Meow. Meow. Meow!” [Just like the end of the Meow Mix song.]
*****
Yeah yeah, some of you may not be cat lovers or whatever but hey, this is dedicated to Flip okay? I loved her like a person so she will be sorely missed. It was her time though.
As for this week’s edition, I hope you enjoyed it. I had fun and laughed a bit while I was writing it so writing can be therapeutic after all!
Please note that I am now offering to do surprise Birthday editions of the Fellip Nectar Stand. This entails writing up an edition with a Scaper to honor a special Scaper whose birthday is coming up. We cover everything from special requests to beverages to gifts to guests. Then, the edition is published on the birthday of the special Scaper on the sci-fi bb and the FNS website. Please give two weeks notice in advance to contact me.
Take care Scapers! :)