AN: Not your average songfic. Completely AU with no actual digimon. It
includes both slash and het (focusing on the slash), and the rest you’ll have
to find out for yourselves (however, there is no *hiss, spit* sorato). I have
nothing against anyone and own nothing.
When I say indirectly inspired by a Russian fairy tale, it’s because
I don’t know the original story but Ooberman wrote a beautiful song based on
it. I advise you all to visit www.ooberman.com
and follow the links to the Running Girl mini-site to find out more.
Feedback to fitchers_bird@yahoo.co.uk
Walking over snow fields
away from all the trouble we had caused,
She held me closer,
Like two stars following the wind.
Something made me shiver
A whisper in the trees like ancient souls,
She held me closer
Like a blanket woven from ice.
Moonlight falls like love in the cold night,
Hold me we’ll sleep in the snow.
Whispering to the snow flakes,
Singing in the voice of ancient souls,
She told the story
Of two hearts lost in the wind:
"A thousand years ago here,
Stumbling in the night so in love,
They stopped and fell down
Into a coffin woven from ice."
Ooberman – "Here Come the Ice Wolves"
Two forbidden lovers clung together desperately. The leader of these intrepid adventurers shook his head in disgust. "If we were in civilisation, you two would be hanged."
Eyes flashed in anger and contempt. Some civilisation indeed, that outlaws true love and honest affection. Still, no words were spoken. The pair knew that there was nothing they could do that would make their crime less grievous in the eyes of their compatriots.
The leader turned away to address the tearful one by his side. "You were going to marry …that—" He paused and calmly spat into the snow. It froze almost immediately. "You should decide what should happen to them."
"Give them some provisions and let them make their own way." The judgement was pronounced in the stony voice of one who has no more tears left to cry. "If they choose to reject our ways then they have no place here with us."
At this the youngest gasped. "But in these conditions they would freeze to death." This concern was ignored.
Two former best of friends stared at each other in a silent farewell. Possibly an apology was lurking beneath the surface, but from whom it sprang it was impossible to tell.
Soon it was done. The two lovers departed into the snow fields, taking little more with them than they could carry and their love for each other. They would always have their love.
***
"Miya, where do you think we can go?"
"I don’t know, Kari. I just don’t know." The lavender-haired girl tried to surreptitiously wipe a tear from her eye and stared doggedly at the miles of white stretching out in front of them. Cast out from all she held dear and with their food supplies running low, it was hard to maintain hope. But she had to for the sake of the one she loved.
It had been a tough journey anyway, even when all six of them had been travelling together towards the settlement. The remote village they had been heading for had actually been founded by Hikari’s older brother, Taichi. How would he react when he found out what had happened to his little sister? However, the more pressing problem was to discover for themselves what was going to become of them. For nearly a week they had been walking now and they had seen no more signs of life than the occasional bird fluttering far overhead. In all likelihood the two girls would die out here. Still, Miyako had to stay strong. She couldn’t let Hikari know her fears and doubts.
"Please Miya, if you want to cry, cry." Miyako looked up in surprise. "We’ve lost everything else so we have to be honest with each other. Don’t try to protect me. I want to share everything with you, including your pain."
"I’m sorry. It’s just that…that…." The long-suppressed sobs began to emerge. "I’m so afraid that this will be the end of us." Hikari tried to calm her lover but ended up crying herself. So they held each other closer, two hearts lost in the wind.
***
Daisuke was troubled. The whole group was troubled. Ever since the two girls had been banished he wondered if more than five words had been spoken. Surely, what he had done had been for the best. Ignoring all the trouble they had caused, even if they had made it to New Odaiba Hikari and Miyako would have been sentenced to death. Homosexuality was evil and against all morality. The punishment may seem harsh but that was life out here in these remote settlements. Besides any guilt he felt disappeared when he looked around at the remaining travellers. He may not always get on so well with Takeru but there was no denying that he and Hikari were like brother and sister; likewise Miyako and Iori. And then there was Ken…
When his blue-haired best friend had announced his engagement, the greatest shock was in finding out that he had actually proposed to anyone! Ken took a long time to trust someone but when he finally did he cared for them with all his heart. For someone to betray such love was the worst crime Daisuke could even think of. Maybe Daisuke would have been gentler on the two lovers if he hadn’t been able to see the pure agony Ken was going through every time they touched.
It had been Takeru that had come up with their cover story. Taichi was a good man whom Daisuke respected immensely. There was no possible way the travellers would allow news of his sister’s disgrace to reach him. The journey was arduous, even dangerous during the harsh winter months. The very first time it had been made, with Taichi leading a different group of six settlers, two people had died. One of these had been Takeru’s brother Yamato, Taichi’s best friend; the other was Jyou, the group medic. The survivors’ pain at their passing was still so raw that the circumstances of the deaths were never mentioned. Daisuke only dared to use this excuse for the disappearance of the female members of their group as it was Takeru’s idea. Besides, thinking of his own sister, Daisuke felt that in such a case death would be a blessing.
***
The two lovers had trudged on for miles. In the distance they heard the howl of a wolf and the answering echo of its mate. They convinced each other that that was a good thing. If there was enough food for a wolf to survive on then they should cope just fine. Neither of the two women wanted to think of what exactly it was that the wolves ate.
As it was getting late, Hikari and Miyako decided that they should find a place to rest for the night. There was no shelter in sight. The only relief from the endless vistas of virgin snow a heap of curiously piled stones. At the sight of this, Miyako smiled as much as her tired muscles would let her. Perhaps some past traveller had left a cairn of provisions in case of emergency. "We could be saved," whispered the purple-haired one as she went to investigate.
Hikari, her slight frame shivering in the cold, slumped to the ground grateful for the chance to rest. She couldn’t share in the other’s hope. They were going to die. A sliver of doubt slipped into her mind: was it worth it? Perhaps she should have denied everything, continued on to New Odaiba where Miyako and Ken would have married and she would have probably ended up marrying Takeru. They may not have been happy, but at least then they would be alive. No. One look at her lavender-haired love convinced her that any time they didn’t spend together was not worth living. It didn’t matter what anyone else thought… A scream distracted Hikari from her reflections. With strength she hadn’t realised she still had she raced to her love.
The stones had indeed been a marker, but not for a cairn of food. It was impossible to tell who had set them there. Lying beneath them, gently covered by a shroud of snow, where two bodies frozen together. Wrapped around each other in their icy coffin, their love was obvious to any observer. It was especially poignant for the two that stumbled across their resting place, as the two men, both tall and slender, were known to the pair. "Yamato," Hikari almost sobbed, her hand separated from the blond’s cheek by the ice.
"Jyou," stated Miyako simply as she caressed her lover’s free hand. "So that’s where they went. No wonder Taichi always refused to discuss it. The same thing must happened to them as to us."
"And the same thing is going to happen to us as happened to them," Hikari said slowly. Then with feverish energy, she grasped both hands of the other girl and looked into her eyes as she added, "But I don’t care. I don’t care. I don’t mind dying. In fact, I’d welcome it as long as I got to be with you. As long as we’re together—"
She winced, more from shock than in pain, as Miyako slapped her. With a sudden intense fury the other spoke. "No! We are not going to die and we are most definitely not going to just give up. Otherwise what’s the use of all this, of anything?" Her wide gestures encompassed the arctic landscape and the two pairs of lovers, male, female, dead and alive. "If we quit now we’re be betraying what Jyou and Yamato died for!" She pulled the brunette towards her and continued in a softer voice, "Life without love is pointless. But love without life is futile. We have to live not just for our sake, but for theirs. We must prove that love can survive, no matter what."
Hikari nodded silently, frozen tears clinging to her cheeks. The pair huddled up together and fell asleep, oblivious to the snowy white wolves padding slowly towards them.
***
Sora looked over to her husband, still sitting on the porch of their timber frame house. Taichi had not moved from that spot since he had heard of his sister’s fate. He just sat there, gazing over the icy tundra. "Tai," she called lovingly, "Aren’t you going to come in?"
Without turning he replied, "In a little while." He sounded distant and old, nothing like the vibrant and warm young man who had won her heart when she had thought it broken beyond repair. The whole village mourned the loss, thinking the two women had been lost in a snow drift. The four who made the original journey, however, had quickly realised the truth. They would never admit it, but each of them recognised the peculiar mixture of grief, guilt and righteousness in the eyes of the ‘survivors’.
She sat beside him, intending to comfort him but he shrugged off her touch. Although she was desperate to say something, Sora remained silent. Her words died on her tongue, leaving a bitter taste like ashes.
"Do you think it has something to do with me?" he asked suddenly. "I mean, am I cursed or something?"
Sora immediately leapt to her husband’s defence. "No Taichi, you can’t think that! No-one blames you."
"I hope so…" His voice trailed off and he stared at the ground. "It’s just that I keep thinking about them lost out there in the cold. I can see them holding each other, telling each other that it’s going to be just fine. But it isn’t and now I’m sure he’s dead and it’s all my fault!"
"Listen, you can’t blame yourself. I’m sure they found somewhere. At least this way they had a chance."
His voice was flat as Taichi interrupted her reassurances. "They never
had a chance. We never gave them a chance. He was my best friend and I left
him to die."
Sora blinked in surprise. "This is about Yamato? But that was years ago
and your sister –"
She was cut off as if she had never begun to speak, almost as if she wasn’t even there. "Was it worth it? How could it be worth it? I did what I had to, what anyone would have done." In his mind blue eyes glared back accusingly, filled with anger and betrayal. "I hated him for so long. Then somehow we were best friends. Nearly all our days were spent together. I couldn’t imagine my life without him." For the first time he turned to his wife and she could see the tears in his eyes. "I spent so long hating him before I knew him. I couldn’t hate him again. Despite everything I never hated him again."
Then it was Sora who turned away, trying to ignore the feeling that somehow her husband was asking for her forgiveness.
***
Miyako lazily stretched out towards her love. Her hand brushed against soft fur but reached no-one. She was confused. Where was Hikari …and since when did they have fur blankets? The ‘blanket’ stirred, and the woman froze. Hikari was gone and in her place lay a snow-white wolf who turned to look at her with piercing blue eyes. "Do not fear me," he said calmly, "It was your words that brought us after all."
This statement only added to her confusion. "M-m-my words?"
The wolf nodded in reply. What on earth was going on? What was this creature, and why did Miyako feel as if she knew him?
His keen animal senses must have alerted him to the newcomers quickly, as the wolf rose and padded over to distant figures who soon turned out to be Hikari and another wolf, this one with a faint bluish tinge to his fur. Blue-eyes greeted blue-fur with affection, ignoring their human companions. "Hikari, what’s going on?"
"You know, Miya. I think I did even before Jyou explained everything to me."
"Jyou? Then the other one must be--"
"Yamato, yes. They came back to save us."
"Oh… but how? We saw their bodies. It’s unbelievable."
Their canine rescuers had returned by this time and took this opportunity to speak. "The flesh is unimportant. What matters is the spirit. That is from where love arises and through which it lives. Despite anything that happens to the body, love can and must always find a way to live on." Jyou’s onyx eyes glinted in the cold sunlight. " ‘Life without love is pointless. But love without life is futile.’ Weren’t those your words, Miyako?"
The taller girl merely nodded in reply.
Yamato now continued where his mate had left off. "We watched you, all of you, during the journey for we still cared. After your expulsion the parallels between our lives and yours were far too great for us to leave you. But we could do nothing until we heard Miyako’s speech. Then we knew that you understood and so we have came to offer you a choice, a chance. One that long ago was made to us. Sacrifice your bodies so that your love may live."
"Would we become like you then? We’d have to live as wolves or die?" Hikari’s voice trembled slightly either in fear, in anticipation or simply due to the cold.
"I don’t know," replied Yamato simply. "No-one can tell what form your spirits will take. There is even a risk that your spirits will become trapped in limbo and lost forever. Only if you truly care for each other will you return to this world."
The human lovers stared into each other’s eyes. Concern, anxiety, dread– all of these could be seen in there, but they were not alone. Past these transitory emotions deeper, truer feelings lay. Without uttering a word, the decision was made.
***
Something was most definitely not right. Neither Miyako’s fiancé nor Hikari’s brother had turned to their memorial service. Everyone was told that their grief was too overpowering for them to be able to face society. A necessary lie. Ken was still fuming over the fact that it was a joint service. It seemed to him as if they were condoning or even approving of that unnatural relationship. As for Taichi…
Daisuke did not want to admit it but he had been avoiding the town’s leader ever since their last meeting. Guilt had driven him to try to admit exactly what had happened. To Daisuke’s surprise, Taichi had waved away the first attempt at a stuttered apology. Fixing the redhead with an intense stare, he had asked how Daisuke would feel if anything ever happened to Ken.
Confusion had swept over Daisuke. The blue-haired genius was his best friend; how was he supposed to feel?
"No," Taichi had continued. "How would you feel what happened to Y—to Hikari and Miyako happened to Ken?"
Brushing aside the shock at realising Taichi both knew his sister’s fate and was not angry, there was a rush of differing emotions. The obvious one was bewilderment, but also anger, disgust and nausea. Daisuke felt strangely unsettled at the thought of Ken with (another) man. The compassion and apparent understanding in the other’s deep brown eyes repelled him and he had rushed away.
Later on Taichi slept. He dreamt uneasily, haunted by a pair of blue eyes and a pair of brown. In the distance he thought he could hear the howling of wolves.
***
Two lovers held each other underneath a blanket of ice. Their sleep would be eternal. Their peaceful smiles betrayed no knowledge of the freezing temperatures. Together their bodies would lie there forever.
On the surface, two wolves bayed at the moon. When finally silence settled over them they padded away and disappeared into the horizon. Their task was done. Now they could devote themselves to each other.
No human could have survived the arctic weather. Yet if one had and was there at that time, they would have seen a most unusual sight. Two eagles, flying together in harmony at night, caused a shadow against the moon. They soared into the sky, rejoicing in their new-found freedom. As they approached a nearby settlement, their cries of pure happiness disturbed the few inhabitants still awake.
Far below, Taichi wept.