Office Gossip
By Vanilla Tiger
AN: For Evette's FCFM challenge #1
Feedback to fitchers_bird@yahoo.co.uk
“So I had a look at some
of his sketches, and I feel that if we got him some real training, he could
turn out to be a real artist.” Angel looked up hopefully at his ghostly PA.
“You see, I thought you took over Wolfram and Hart to further help the helpless,
not to run an art foundation. Or a dating agency.” Technically Cordelia was
still in a coma. Luckily the science division had found a way improving on old
spells for astral projection and telekinesis to allow the former actress/secretary/divine
mother to communicate. Soon Angel and Cordelia had fallen back into their old
routines.
The vampire appeared flustered. “Dating? No, I don’t want to… I mean, I can’t…
Dating?”
“I don’t see you pay this much attention to any of your other new employees.”
Even the lack of a body couldn’t lessen Cordy’s sarcasm.
“Well, he’s just such got a friendly personality, said Angel, apparently focusing
all his attention on the nearest document to him.
“Oh! So you were doodling pictures of Andrew’s personality when you were supposed
to be listening to Fred’s report at the last interdepartmental meeting.” It
was fortunate Cordelia had given up dreams of superstardom, because her impression
of a surprised person would have won her no awards - well, maybe a daytime Emmy.
Angel immediately protested. “I’d had a hard day, and those meetings really
drag on. And does anybody understand Fred’s reports?” The thought reached Angel
a little late that maybe that wasn’t the part of the sentence he should be trying
to refute..
Cordelia’s smile showed that fact had not escaped her notice. “What is it with
you and blondes anyhow? Hey, maybe if Wesley had bleached his hair he’d have
had a better chance with you.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Wesley as a blonde? No way would that work.
…Not that the other implications of what Cordelia said were true either. Besides,
Gunn would have staked him if he’d made a move on Wes.
“Please. After all it got you to look at me that way.”
Chastened, Angel reached for her hand, before remembering that his best friend
was currently incorporeal. Undeterred, he continued. “Cordy, you’ve got to understand-“
His heartfelt speech was summarily interrupted. “Hey buster, I thought we’d
dealt with this already. I am so over you. Now get out there and ask Andrew
out already!”
“But what if he’s not interested?”
Cordelia burst out laughing. One glance at Angel’s kicked puppy expression stopped
that. “Hold on, you were serious.”
Angel tried to look nonchalant, but failed miserably. “Well, it’s just when
he talks to Wes, there’s this …vibe there between them.”
“And? Listen to me Angel - if Wesley was having sex with everyone he vibed with,
the entire office would be in one big orgy, which we would know about because
we’d both be there instead moaning about your love life. The man’s one huge
guy-slut.”
Angel considered protesting, but had to admit that Cordelia had a point there.
She continued. “Anyway, I think Spike and Lilah have come to an arrangement,
if you know what I mean.”
“Spike and Lilah together?” Angel gulped. “That sounds…” Hot. “ disturbing.”
“Even more so if you’d realised what I meant was Wesley, Spike and Lilah are
together. How weird must that be having three of your kinda-exes hook up? Makes
me glad that you and Xander always hated each other." Cordelia paused speculatively.
"Unless that was a cover for something?”
“Huh? No!” The idea of being attracted to Xander Harris was luckily able to
produce enough disgust in Angel to distract him from the opportunity for jealous
brooding. But not for long. “Spike. Wesley. Lilah.” He got up and punched the
window.
He would have continued beating up the innocent glass, if Cordelia hadn’t pushed
him back with her poltergeist-like powers. “Hey, hey, hey! No destroying the
only thing between you and a hideous flamey death.”
Angel looked sheepish. “Sorry.”
“Geez, possessive much? This is why I’m glad we never actually got together.
Anyway, weren’t you all about Andrew a few minutes ago?” It was fortunate that
Angel was already dead, otherwise the scornful look Cordelia gave him might
have caused some serious damage.
“OK, he might not be with Wes, but that doesn’t mean Andrew’s interested in
me. What about that scientist guy he’s friends with?”
“Knox? He spends his time trying to get with Fred, who he hasn’t got a chance
with. And before you ask, that’s because Fred’s still trying to deal with the
fact she’s crushing on a girl who’s only relatively recently legal and is the
sister of the Slayer who was another of the loves of your unlife. And may I
just stop to point out that was again with you and blondes?”
It took a while for Angel to process this onslaught of gossip. His response
was just one groggy word, “Dawn?” His mind recalled the suspicious teen of his
Sunnydale days. It was strange enough to think of her going to UCLA, let alone
having a girlfriend.
“Yeah, that was kinda freaky at first but you should see those two together.
They are so cute!”
Hmph. People should not be happy together while Angel was reluctantly single
but too nervous to do anything about it. Angel brooded, less comfortably than
he used to do. Airy offices with light walls, modern furniture and large windows
just didn't provide the right atmosphere.
Also the constant nagging of the spirit of his best friend was a touch distracting.
Did she have to be so right all the time? If only there was some way he could
prove at least part of what she said was false. "Wait! Drusilla wasn't
blonde."
"Uh-huh. And that whole affair in Sunnydale wasn't just about making Spike
jealous. Spike who happened to be blond at the time. I'm telling you, I was
seriously worried when Harmony showed up in LA."
Now that was hitting below the belt. That shallow, bloodsucking airhead was
nothing like his sweet, friendly Andrew. Angel thought of the way Andrew was
always so enthusiastic and eager to help, his quick mind finding a wealth of
references on any topic. Of course Angel didn't always quite understand what
exactly he was going on about, but it wasn't like he had always known what Wesley
had meant either.
There was something special about Andrew, and they could be happy together.
The question was, did Angel even deserve to be? After all…
"Hey, no brooding mister!" Man, Cordelia was fast. "I've had
it with you. You are going to go out there and ask Andrew out." Despite
his protests Angel was lifted up and pushed outside his office. "And don't
even think about coming back without stacks of good gossip," Cordelia cried
out as she telekinetically slammed the door shut.
After a few moments of silence, she sighed. "Alone at last."
Invisible to the human eye, Phantom Dennis smiled.