"If I hear one more time about a fool's right to his tools of rage, I'm gonna take all my friends and we're gonna move to Canada, and we'll die of old age.""When straight people start getting crucified on fences in wyoming for being straight, when being straight means not being allowed to marry or adopt children, when being straight means you are likely to get your ass kicked unless you are silent about it, when being straight means stares and comments when you hold your lover's hand in public, that will be the day i'm marching at the front of your "straight pride" parade and clamoring for "heterosexual liaisons", "straight studies" and "heterosexual scholarships".
"If I hear one more time about a fool's right to his tools of rage, I'm gonna take all my friends and we're gonna move to Canada, and we'll die of old age."
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."
"On the average, everyone has one testicle."
"Since becoming the hit of the 1946 American Toy Fair, Slinky sales have totaled more than 250 million -- roughly one for every man, woman and child in the United States. And this from a toy that can't talk, fire rockets or wet itself."
"If they really wanted to stop people from smoking pot, they should legalize medical marijuana. Under this country's health-care system, nobody would be able to get it."
"Remember, if someone pisses you off, it takes less muscles to smile than frown, and even less to reach over and bitch slap them."
"There's nothing like unrequited love to drain the flavor out of a peanut butter sandwich."
"The things you own end up owning you."
"If only people with brains challenged what others
have said, we would live in Utopia."
"My karma ran over your dogma."