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Last Update- 8-11-08
So you find me attractive, do you?
Well, then-this is what I'm looking for (and not looking for) in a guy.
The Basics
These are the must-haves!
1. You have to live near me (IE, western Washington state).
Frankly, a long-distance realationship, or an Internet relationship just isn't good enough for me. I want someone I can do things with on a regular basis. Now I've met some nice guys over the internet, but trying to sustain something when the guy's in NY or LA, or even Oregon just takes more time than I have right now.
2. You have to want a dating or a LT relationship; no one-night stands!
I'm not interested in just having sex with guys, and I'm not going to jump in the sack on the first date, either. I have to really like a guy before I'll go all the way with him, and preferably in an exclusive relationship. Doesn't mean I won't neck on the first date, but (like most women) I want the physical relationship to build relatively slowly. Unless you can really wow me, you'll have to take your time to be able to work your way with me. But I do think that it's worth waiting for!
3. You shouldn't have your own gender identity and/or sexual orientation problems.
I have to have a guy who is comfortable with his masculinity and his sexual orientation. I don't want to be just a vehicle for someone who is trying to work out his own issues with gender, or is trying to hide from the fact that he's gay. Bisexual is fine, and so is someone who prefers T-girls to genetic girls, but I am definately not a top! There is no way you're going to get me to, shall we say, take the "active" role during intercourse.
The Preferences
The more things we have in common, the better the relationship will be.
1. I'm looking for a guy who is intelligent and educated.
I'd like someone I can hold an intelligent conversation with, that can keep up with my references, and that knows a lot about the world. I have an MA in anthropogy, so I'd really prefer someone at about the same educational level. At least with some college, or a Batchelor's, or even with a PhD!
2. Politically liberal is a big plus.
I'm quite liberal politically, and active in the local Democratic party. I really don't need to be constantly arguing with my guy about political issues. As a transgendered woman, I see little to recommend the Republican party to me, either on GLBT issues or as a woman. And Libertarians seem to me to be taking "rugged individualism" to its illogical extreme!
3. Have a sense of humor
To quote Jessica Rabbit, "He makes me laugh". I have a positive outlook on life, and a rather dry & slightly skewed sense of humor. A guy with a similar sense of humor will be much more interesting to me; I think it's important that we can laugh at the same sorts of things. At least it would cut down on arguments about what movie we go to see!
4. Be able to pay the bills.
I'm not looking for someone who is rich and will take care of me for the rest of my life, and I can't really see me as a housewife. But I'm not about to support someone else, either; my income is enough for me to live on, and that's it! I want a guy who is independant & can stand on his own two feet, and for that matter, will let me do the same.
5. Spiritual would be nice.
I was raised Catholic, and even though I am no longer loyal to the Vatican, I still consider myself to be a spiritual person and go to church (Episcopal now; I know, big change!) fairly regularly. So I would hope that you would have your own sense of spirituality, as long as you're not a fundamentalist (of whatever religion).
6. Tall and handsome would be nice, too!
Well, looks count for something for me, too! :) While a guy's looks are not the deciding factor (how he treats me is), I would like a guy that I found physically attractive. Someone who takes care of himself, is physically fit, has good hygene, and dresses well will be able to woo me a lot more successfully than someone who doesn't give a damn about his appearance. And having someone taller than me would let me wear heels when we go out, too! ;)
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