"Hey!" JC shouted. "You just fucked up my laundry!"

"So," Chris said. He stood up and towered over JC. "Whatcha gonna do about it."

"Is that a threat?" JC asked, and smiled at Chris, who's arms were folded across his chest.

"You wanna piece of me?" Chris said.

"Only if I get to pick what piece," JC said. His hand snaked up Chris' leg, precariously close to his crotch.

"Ewww. Queer cooties!" Chris yelped and jumped backwards. He fell against the bed and slid onto the floor, taking sheets and laundry with him.

"If anyone's got queer cooties, it's you," JC said. He laughed and straddled Chris' thighs.

Chris unbuttoned JC's shirt and threw it up on the bed with the rest of the laundry. He took a nipple into his mouth and sucked.

JC was busy with Chris' zipper. It wouldn't budge.

"Man, what's wrong with your pants?" JC asked. "They won't let me in."

"Get up," Chris said. The two of them stood up and Chris fiddled with his pants. The zipper still wouldn't move.

"Dammit," JC whined. "This is ruining the mood." He flopped on the bed and took off his own pants, throwing them at a frustrated Chris. Chris harumphed at JC and tried to pull his pants off with the zipper up.

"This isn't working," Chris said. "I think these pants are now permanently a part of me."

Chris sat down on the bed next to JC. JC looked down at his not-so-hard-anymore penis. "What are we gonna do?" he asked.

Chris got up and walked over to the desk. He opened the top drawer and rummaged through stamps, pens, and scraps of paper. At the bottom of the drawer he found them.

JC laughed as he saw what Chris had pulled out. "You're going to cut yourself out of your pants?" he asked.

"What else am I going to do, melt them off me?" Chris said.

"I'm sure I could do that -- I always make you all gooey, why not your pants, too?" JC said. He took the scissors from Chris and kneeled down in front of him. JC licked the zipper, making Chris moan.

"What makes you think this is going to work?" Chris said.

"Be patient," JC said. He rubbed his thumb up and down the zipper, massaging Chris' groin.

After Chris was sufficiently hard, JC grabbed at the zipper.

*Zzzzztttttt*

Chris sighed with relief as he was finally freed from his pants.

"What did I tell you?" JC said. "I have the magic touch."

End.

Originally written as an *Mprov on 10/19/00, with the words WWF, queer.