The Price We Pay

The Price We Pay

Christina
Winter 1997

Usual disclaimers, except I doubt Paramount will ever let them play like this...


Captain Janeway laughed at something the Gilrian ambassador said, then picked up another of the delicate lavender fruits the crew of Voyager had fallen in love with during their 2 weeks on this beautiful and hospitable planet. She was apparently unaware of the furtive glances her First Officer cast her direction every time she laughed.

He poked at his food, and looked startled when Tom tapped him on the shoulder.

"Commander, is everything all right?"

"Fine," he grumbled. He looked around the room again, everybody seemed to be enjoying themselves. "I'm going to return to the ship." He stood and slipped out of the banquet hall and made his way to where Voyager had landed.

There was a skeleton crew on board, mostly for security reasons. "Commander, is the celebration over?" Tuvok asked when Chakotay appeared on the bridge.

"No."

Tuvok just raised an eyebrow. "Nothing to report here."

Chakotay nodded. "I'm going to be in my office for a couple of hours. Unless it is an emergency, I don't want to be disturbed."

"Very good, sir." Tuvok watched the Commander leave the bridge.

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Kathryn stood up, and looked at her Gilrian host and smiled. "I've had a wonderful time, it looks like we all did. But we have a early departure tomorrow."

Torago nodded. "It has been our pleasure to help you. But I noticed, your first officer left early, was he not pleased?"

"Oh. I hadn't noticed. I'm sure he had his reasons." He hadn't been in a good mood for several days she remembered. "Possibly he was not feeling well."

Torago smiled. "Possibly. Captain Janeway, I will say farewell now and good journey."

"Thank-you," she responded. She turned and looked around. The rest of the crew were following her lead and starting to return to the ship.

#

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In her quarters, she slipped out of her uniform and put on her coral satin nightgown and walked over to the replicator. "Lemon herbal tea..." She vanished in a beam of light.

Commander Chakotay sat down on his bed as he too readied for bed. Just before he vanished, he felt his head throb.

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He looked around, the room was pitch black, he could possibly discern shapes, but wasn't sure. "Anybody here?" He called out quietly.

"Chakotay?"

"Captain? Where the hell are we?"

"How the hell should I know," she responded angrily. "I can't see a damn thing." She looked away from the sound of his voice. "I'm sorry, this isn't your fault. I just don't like being abducted."

He laughed. "Keep talking, I think I'm almost..." He grabbed her as he collided. Quickly releasing her, as he realized she was not in uniform. For that matter all he was wearing was a dark brown robe. He wished for a bit more light so he could see her in her nightgown.

Kathryn was blushing. Here she was, where ever that was, with *that* man, and all that was between her and him was a thin piece of satin. She moved a step and ran into a wall. She struggled to bring her thoughts back to their prison. "Chakotay, follow the wall that way." She touched him to indicate the direction. "And I'll go the other. We should meet somewhere."

He smiled. "Yes, Captain."

She let her right hand glide along the wall, taking small steps and using her left hand to feel if anything was in front of her. Every couple of steps she stopped, and felt more of the wall. Looking for indentations, doors, any clue as to where they were. The room wasn't big, so they met very quickly.

"Anything?" She asked, not expecting a positive response.

"Nothing." He reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder. "Kathryn..."

"Chakotay, I don't understand this. The Gilrians seemed so friendly. Why this and why now?"

"I'm sure we'll find out soon enough." He sat down against the wall. "Sit down." He was surprised when she did. He could feel the satin and her thigh as she sat down next to him.

A voice spoke, it was there in the center of the room. "Captain Janeway, Commander Chakotay, we're sorry for our lack of courtesy, but our analysis of your species indicated you would not willing cooperate."

"Who the hell..." Chakotay placed a hand on her shoulder. "Who are you?" She said in a monotone.

"Torago," the voice said.

"Why?" Chakotay asked.

"For two weeks we have not been ourselves. We are not corporeal beings--but we can take different shapes as necessary. We rarely get visitors..."

"I can imagine," Chakotay muttered quietly.

"...So meeting with you has been a joyful experience." The voice sounded embarrassed. "We don't have emotions, but we feel them through others. So as your crew enjoyed themselves, found pleasure on our home, we found enjoyment. But the emotions shared between you two and many of the others were different, wonderful, sad, lonely, happy...It was such an unique experience we tried to find out more. But it also seems to be a very private emotion. Your species is not comfortable talking about these feelings."

"So, you decided to kidnap the two of us and find out..." Janeway said angrily.

"Kidnap sounds so, awful. Borrow. Your ship leaves in six hours. We promise to return you as soon as..."

"As what?" Despite the calmness and friendliness of the voice, she was irritated. And afraid. She had a good idea where this was heading and it was heading in a direction she had carefully avoided for almost three years.

"Confusion, fear, yet a feeling of anticipation. These contrary emotions we find intriguing."

"We would have been willing for you to access our database, it would give you a far better understanding of the emotions and what they mean..." Chakotay said.

There was a sigh. "Computers are dull. No emotion. We selected you two, because of these feelings you share for each other. And your reluctance to share them."

She felt her stomach flutter. She closed her eyes, it was going the way she feared. "And if we don't cooperate?"

There was a long pause. "We were hoping you would. As a small exchange for the many things we have given your ship."

It was true, the Gilrians had asked for nothing. Now she was beginning to understand why. Torago continued. "We will return you to your ship. You will leave. Unharmed. But why do you resist something you both want?"

"Because..." Kathryn stopped. Because Captains should not become emotionally involved with their crews.

Chakotay continued, "Because despite the feelings we share, we have a ship to command."

"And these feelings interfere? Why?"

She almost laughed, as she thought of her niece--always asking why.

"I like that feeling. A pleasant memory." The voice stopped and waited. "Very well, Captain Janeway, Commander Chakotay. I will return you to your ship. But I feel the regret you both feel. Farewell and good journey."

Again there was the beam of light and they found themselves back on Voyager. In her quarters.

He stood staring at her, transfixed by the sight of her hair falling over her bare shoulders, the gown hugging her curves.

She blushed and turned away. "Commander, perhaps..." She looked at him again, his dark eyes held hers. She could feel the power of his presence draw her closer. She stepped toward him, knowing that after their encounter, he knew what was in her heart. What she had tried for so long and now unsuccessfully to hide from him, from herself. His arms reached out and pulled her closer. She was standing her head pressed to his chest. Finally she looked up. Their lips met in a gentle kiss. But their passion was not to be denied any longer. He leaned her head back and kissed her, hard. She responded in kind. She felt his hands slide the straps of her gown of her shoulders. She wasn't aware of it pooling at her feet as she removed his robe. Both gliding their hands over each other. He reached down and carried her to her bed.

#

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Torago felt the release of emotion. All of the Gilrians did. A warmth swept through the community. Joy, ecstasy filled their beings.


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