Dear Justin.

My last night on earth, what can I say?

Maybe I should start with telling you that I never hurt your girlfriend, no matter what she might say. No matter what anyone might say. I know you don't believe me now, but maybe some day. This is the last letter I'll ever write in my whole life, and I just ask you to read it, read all of it. You probably burnt the other letters I sent you and I understand you. But please, read this one.

I know Jennifer said that I raped her, I know she won in court, I know all too well. But I never raped her Jutin, I know you believe her because of the circumstances, but I never raped anyone. I'd never be able to rape anyone, especially not your girlfriend. I know we fought all the time, and I'm sorry. She was your girlfriend, I should have tried to get along with her more I guess. But it was so hard, I guess it wasn't a good chemistry mix between us.

Still I slept with her. I'm sorry about that Justin, I'm really, really sorry. Not only cause that was probably what made the jury find me guilty of rape. I'm sorry cause she was your girlfriend, I shouldn't have, I knew it so well but still I did. I know you've done the same, with Danielle, but I never did... I wish I never had.

Not many people believe me either. I can't even count all the times I've been beaten up here. They call me a child molester, pedophile and a lot of other things, I guess I am some of that too. Jennifer is only 17, almost 18 but not quiet yet. I know I'm not the only one, there was this guy who bragged about it. He actually thought it was something good. I say was cause he got murdered five days ago. The prisoners might be murderers and rapists but they still think that raping a child is something really awful. I don't think anyone was surprised when they found the guy dead. But that's not what I wanted to tell you, far from actually.

I got a visit the other day. A girl, just 15 years old. I don't know how she got in here in the first place, but she said she'd claimed to be my sister. She did have some similar lines, but sister? I don't know. She's a fan. One of my fans. I was so happy to get someone to talk to that I really couldn't tell the guards that I didn't know her at all. Maybe you already know, or maybe you've guessed it just like I did, but our fans gets a lot of crap for this now. She's one of the few that still believes that I'm innocent J. She actually believes me, even though so many hates me now. We talked for a while, until the guards told us that the time was up. She was the last person from outside this prison that I'll talk to. My family can't come. I don't think they want to see me fried. I understand them. Your hair catches fire you know, they say that you don't die at once, that you are alive for a couple of painful seconds. I'm scared. I never pictured my life ending in the electric chair.

The girl, he name was Amanda, she told me that many of her friends didn't believe I was innocent, even though they were fans too. Or as she said, former fans. I'm sorry, I guess I've made you all come off as assholes now, haven't I? Amanda was so nice, for being a girl talking to a complete stranger that's been sentence to death for rape. For anyone actually. She listened to me, and I listened to her. I think she believed what I told her, it seemed like it anyway. And she had some stories to tell too, I just wish that we'd have more time. That I'd had more time to get to know her. I wouldn't want her as a girlfriend, she's way too young, but as a friend. I know she came cause she's a fan and she wanted to meet me, but Justin, she treated me like a person, not as a celebrity.
She was probably the best comfort I could have had that day.

How are the guys taking it? How are your families taking it all? And how are you taking it? I want to know, but I won't know, I know I won't. I hope they don't hate me, I guess they do but I hope they don't.

Justin, how is Jennifer taking it? Is she happy? Sad? I want to know so badly. She's a good actress, watch your back around her, and don't trust her. Coming from me? A convicted rapist, and a former popstar. Yeah, it actually does, and I mean it with all my heart. I love you guys as my brothers, but that girl... she can tear us apart easily. Just look where she got me.

I still remember your words, that you hated me for raping your girlfriend. I never did. I slept with her, I admit, but rape her? No J, I would never be able to do that to another person. Never. Did you ever doubt her? Just for a second? Or maybe believed me, just for a short moment? I know it was my word against her, and she was crying and we were always fighting. And that time I held her down on the floor and you walked into the room together with Chris. I know you got puset, but she was really mad, she'd been throwing things at me and I didn't know what else to do to make her stop. And my outburst in court, I guess that was what made me unable to win. I shouldn't have called her a whore, I shouldn't have said that I wanted to see her dead. I didn't mean it. Or maybe I did, at the time. But Justin, she's murdering me. And she's doing it legally, she's going to get away with it. Whatever she might say, I never raped her. I know this is something you don't want to hear but she was in on it just as much as I was. How far can someone go to break a group apart? I've wondered that a couple of times, Jennifer gave me an answer to that question. Think about that for a while.

I have to end this letter now, I don't want to but I have to. The lights are going out in just a few minutes. Thank you for reading this, tell the others I didn't do it and tell your families too. And most importantly Justin, don't turst that girl, she'll hurt you too. I'm still going on about how I'm innocent, I know you probably don't believe me anyway. Tell them I love them too. I love you too, you're like my borther even though all of this.

Bye Justin, and live a good life but be careful. Don't end it like I'm going to end mine.

/J.C.