brisbadday

Brian was laying happily on the couch in his hotel room, sleeping soundly, with a content smile on his happy little face. His arms were crossed at his chest and his ankles crossed at the bottom. Yes, he was a happy, peaceful Brian. Happy, peaceful Brian is about to become confused, sad Brian. Let's let him rest a few more minutes, he'll need it.

~*a few minutes later*~

Brian was awoke by the feeling that something was abnormally close to his face. His eyes popped open and he was staring right at -
Nick's ass.
"Ahhhhhhhhhh! Nick get your big booty outta my face!!" Brian screamed, scrambling to his feet. Nick stood up from his squatting position over Brian's face. Yep, he was squatting. And he looked hurt, "Brian, I do not have a big booty."
Brian stared at him for a moment trying to make sense of his behavior. "Yes you do and WHY was it in my face?"
"They are AFTER ME BRIAN! Don't you CARE?!" Nick shouted, his eyes wide.
"Whoa...whoa Nick. Who's after you? And why would putting your behind in my face help you get away?"
"BECAUSE," he rolled his eyes like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Howie told me to do it and they'll STOP!"
"Howie? Howie told you this? Well...okay....whatever Nick. Leave now. Go." Brian shooed Nick towards the door. Just then they both heard a noise.
*THUMP!!*
Nick craned his neck up to see into the room. His head darted around, trying to find the origin of the noise.
"Nick have you been smoking pot?"
Nick's head stopped darting and he narrowed his eyes all suspicious-like at Brian. "Why?," he said slowly "What do you know?..."
Brian shook his head and closed the door on Nick, leaning against it. Whew. Well at least he was wearing pants. That would be a bad situation if he hadn't been. "Eww." he though outloud.
Brian went back and sat on the couch. That's when he noticed a movement in the plant that was sitting in the corner of the room. Brian, becoming curious, started to sneek up on the suspicious houseplant.

*Rustle Rustle*

He crept closer. That's when he noticed a set of eyes from between the leaves of the plant. The eyes were little slits, staring straight at Brian. It was VERY obvious that it was Howie since the leaves did little to hide the rest of his body.
"Howie why are you here? And.....what exactly are you doing?" Brian sighed.
Howie just curled himself up in a ball and sunk lower behind the plant.
"Howie, talk to me."
He peered at Brian with his little slit eyes.
Brian, becoming exasperated, picked up the plant and put it aside. Howies narrow little eyes became wide. "Brian! I am exposed! This is a dirty trick Brian, dirty!" Howie cowered down and covered his head with his arms.
"Howie. Get up, please. Why did you tell Nick to squat over my face?"
Howie removed his arms from his head. His eyes were all narrowed again. "I don't know what you're talking about, I don't! Why must you abuse me so!" he screamed, running from the room. Brian scratched his head. He decided to venture out and try his luck with the rest of the guys.
He opened his door, and was within an inch of running smack dab into Kevin. Kevin smiled. "Heeeeey Briiiian. Wanna play Candylaaand? I'll let you be the blue gingerbread mannn" He held up the plastic gingerbread men gamepieces.
"Uh, no Kev. That's alright. Have you seen AJ?"
Kevin's grin fell. "Noooo. Nobody's seen.... hiiiimm allll.... daaay. He locked himself innn....his rooom and .... won't .... come out....I-"
"Kev, hurry up man I'm gettin' kinda restless here." Kevin was talking unusually slow today. Even for him.
"Oh sorrry. I asked....himmm....if...he wanted to...play Candylaaaand with me....and heeeee......opened the door....long enough .....to shooot nerf....darts at.....mee."
Brian sighed, thankful he was finally finished speaking.
"Well I'm gonna go check on him." Brian pushed past him and started down the hall.
"Come on Bri, you sure? Since....you're my cousinnnn and alllll I thought-"
Brian stopped and turned around, "I know I'm your cousin Kev, and so does everybody else in the world. Maybe later though. I'm gonna go find AJ now." Brian continued walking.
"Last chance to catch the train to Candyland, Frick! All aboard! Woo-Woooooooooo!!!!!!!" Brian looked back at Kevin, who was pumping his fist in the air making the train noise. His voice had momentarily sped up too, thank God.
Brian quickly turned the corner to AJ's hall. He approached his door. Room 219. Yep. That's AJ's room. He was a little nervous to see what exactly was up with him.
Just when Brian raised his fist to knock -
the door flung open. Brian craned his neck to see into the room, but he saw no AJ.
"What the..."
He stood there at the door, confused.
"You may enter." said AJ's voice from inside.
Brian walked in. "AJ? Where are you man? Kevin said somethin' about you-"
"You must find me before I come out."
"Huh? Find you? I don't wanna. I just wanna go back to my room-"
"You're very cold.."
"You want me to play hot and cold!?" Brian exclaimed.
"Yes."
He sighed. "Okay, ok." He tentavly took a few steps toward the entertainment system. "Hot or cold?"
"You're getting warmer..."
Brian smiled. This was kinda fun.
He walked towards the couch. "Now?" he smiled.
"Warmer..."
Brian continued walking in his path, the sofa next. "Here?"
"Hot!"
Brian smiled and walked towards the window. "How 'bout n-"
"Cold! Cold!"
He jumped, startled. "Ahh! Oh ok, well..." he moved to the closet.
"You're on fire, Brian."
"Lemme guess. Are you in.......here?" He flung open the closet door to reveal AJ, clad in a diaper and nipple clamps - with pantyhose on his head. He was curled up on the floor, where he had been peering through the crack.
Brian raised his eyebrows, "I don't EVEN want to know."
Brian saw AJ pull something out of his diaper.
A nerf gun.
Brian turned to run. That's when the assault started. AJ jumped out of the closet and chased Brian down the hall, shooting nerf darts at him the whole time. Brian was screaming. He turned the corner and ran right into Kevin and Howie.
"Kev.....D," he said in between gasps of air. "You gotta help me AJ's crazy!"
Just then AJ ran up behind Brian. He took one look at Howie and started crying. "Nooooooo!" he stuck his dart gun in his diaper and took off back to his room, collecting the foam darts from the floor as he went. Howie smiled devilishly and narrowed his eyes. He rubbed his hands together. "Yes....run AJ, run...." He laughed again and bolted back towards his own room.
Kevin and Brian stared at each other for awhile.
Then Kevin spoke, "You should've...plaaaaaayed Candyland with...me, cuz." He shrugged and patted Brian on the shoulder, then walked away. He left a poor, confused Brian behind.
On his journey back to his room Brian walked slowly, kicking pointless things on the floor. He was a sad, sad Brian. When he was almost to Nick's room guess who he ran into, literally.
Yep, Nick.
Nick was running out of his room, while looking behind him.
*Bam!*
"Brian! Where have you BEEN!?" I'm so glad to see you! I thought they got you...!"
Brian put his arm comfortingly around Nick's shoulders.
They walked into Brian's room and sat on the couch. "Nick I've had a baaaad night so why don't you just tell me WHO is after you so I can tell them to go away and I can go to BED!"
Nick's eyes were wide, and red from staying awake so long. "The gingerbread men!"
"The gingerbread men?"
"The GINGERBREAD MEN!"
Brian nodded in a sudden realization. "Haven't you been staying with Kevin?"
Nick nodded. "Yeah....yeah and I tried smoking weed to calm me down but it made them BIGGER and start to chase me!"
"Nick the weed is messin' with that little blonde head of yours, ok buddy? The gingerbread men can't get you in here."
Nick nodded meekly and rubbed his eyes.
"Can....can I stay in here Brian? The green gingerbread man is REALLY mad at me and -"
"Yes Nick, yes you can sleep on the couch. I'M going to BED now."
Brian sighed loudly and walked into his bedroom, stopping to look back at Nick who had pulled the covers over his head.
He closed the door loudly behind him. Brian fell on the bed and covered himself up, not even bothering to change clothes. He could hear the faint *thump*'s of nerf darts hitting the hall walls outside. Brian shook his head and closed his tired little eyes.
He didn't see the green gingerbread man peeking out from behind the bathroom door.......

The End!