"Well!" you say, "isn't that an interesting question! You're all going to play a game with me (there is no choice involved), and the game is called 'darling do you love me'. You try to make someone laugh by saying something funny that involves the theme 'darling do you love me', or you can just threaten them to laugh, even though your not supposed to."

"And why, exactly, is there no choice involved in playing this game?"

"Well...there is a choice...I just don't really think that you'd like it..."

Gimli steps forward, and points his axe at you. "We aren't at your mercy, you little twit!"

"Ohohohohoho! But you are! If you don't play with me, I will draw a full-scale scetch of all of you in your pajamas!!!!!"

They don't seem to realize the true horror of this quite yet, so you continue.

"Let's see...Arwen, is it you or Aaragorn that wears lingerie to bed? Oh well, you could both wear it. You hobbits, aren't you the ones who wear 'footie' pajamas? Oh yeah, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe that Gimli wears pajamas with little duckies on it. Legolas wears the full-body Superman costume, right? Boromir...do you wear anything to sleep? I might have to use those little black squares to censor some of you..."

Now they seem to understand. They all begin to protest at the same time, but you can't really make very much out apart from some too clear swearing from Gimli.

"Ready to play?"

"Alright!" Pippin seems ready to go. Kind of makes you wonder...? Naw, he's too naive.

"You can go first," you say to Pippin.

"Wait...me? Alright, alright," Pippin says, still giving Dynast a sideways glance. Finally he walks up to Deep Sea Dolphin and says, "Darling, do you love me?"

Deep Sea Dolphin looks surprised at first, then grabs a sword and cries, "Yes, I love you! You can be my new priest/general!"

"Wh-wha-what?!!" Pippin, needless to say, looks more than surprised.

You decide to:

Intervene with Deep Sea's gaining a new priest/general.

Sit back and watch the show.