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How I Survived DeploymentContent Provided by LIFELines Standing in the cold morning air on the pier has become more than a familiar event. With my children in tow, we tearfully wave at the ship disappearing into the horizon. 'Here we are again, kids,' I recite to myself, as I can still see a glimpse of their father in the distance. With a heavy heart and my brain in overload, I gather up the strength to tackle this long deployment ahead of me and the many challenges it will bring. My husband is on his second deployment in less than three years with the Navy. While he's been out to sea, I've been riding my own waves at home; including taking care of my three children, two with special needs. Each day brings unique obstacles, from juggling numerous doctor appointments to designing a plan to accomplish seven loads of laundry on just two hours of sleep. Many evenings, I succumb to exhaustion as I attempt to manage a virtual single-parent household. It's easy to hear the word "deployment" and instantly think of the months to follow as a death sentence. Even knowing there is an end, it is not always possible to see the glass half full in the beginning. I knew if I was going to make the deployment easier for me, I would need to seek out a support system that understood what I was going through. I found focusing on others helped the time fly by and ease my own deployment concerns. But, like many military spouses who have become accustomed to their own daily schedules, leaving my comfort zone wasn’t exactly the simplest task. Neither was making the first step. First, I jumped in with assisting on the ship's support group and family gatherings. I quickly discovered that there was so much I could do and contribute to others going through the same emotions and experiences as me. I scheduled local monthly coffee dates to share friendship, concerns, and even a laugh or two. For those family members who couldn't meet, I created an online support group for all loved ones connected to the ship. These opportunities eventually led me to my current role as the family support group coordinator for my husband's ship. I have also volunteered for many local organizations around my community. Approaching the half-way point of this deployment, I've realized what a difference getting involved has made in my life. Preparing for a deployment isn't only about tending to a sea bag and taking care of necessary paperwork. It also includes taking care of oneself from the beginning. I have discovered that volunteering of one's time can be a gift in itself. My children have learned the value of giving to those in need. My connection with other military spouses has strengthened, and we've discovered that, although we miss our Sailors greatly, our lives continue on the home front. There will always be tears shed on the pier and loads of laundry to be washed. But deployments can also be a chance to explore new opportunities, achieve goals and even learn a few lessons along the way. It's up to you. Ramona's Checklist http://www.military.com/NewContent/0,13190,Survive_Deployment,00.html?ESRC=family.nl |
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