| 1. Do you eat mushrooms? |
| a) I can't believe you're asking me! Of course not. Never. Under any circumstances. Huh. |
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| b) No. Well, unless you ask me nicely. |
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| c) Yes, quite often. They're not my favourite food though. |
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| d) Mmm mushrooms. I lurve them. They are my bestest buddy. |
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2. Are mushrooms eaten in your household? |
| a) Over my dead body. |
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| b) Sometimes. I don't encourage it though. |
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| c) Oh yes. We've usually got some in the house. |
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| d) Every day, my pretty. I can't live without them! |
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3. If you were served mushrooms at a posh dinner party, in the presence of someone important (e.g. your boss/the Pope/Queen Lizzie), would you: |
| a) Make a massive scene, complain to the chef, and possibly faint with shock. |
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| b) Hide them in your napkin and try not to wince at any bits that sneak onto your fork. |
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| c) Eat them. Duh. |
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| d) Lick your chops and savour every delicious bite. |
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4. If your loving mother/father/partner/best friend asked you to buy them some mushrooms, would you do it? |
| a) Not on your nelly. I'd rap them over the knuckles and tell them they'd better mend their ways. |
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| b) Probably. I wouldn't want to eat them though. |
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| c) Of course. I'd probably ask what they were making with them. |
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| d) Without question. But usually I buy my own, so that I can choose the most juicy flavoursome morsels to tantalise my tastebuds. |
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5. What do mushrooms smell like? |
| a) Just the thought is making me feel sick. Especially fried mushrooms or soup. Blurgh. |
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| b) Um, nothing really. Soil? |
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| c) Tasty, a suppertime treat in the making. |
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| d) Fabulous. I'd wear eau-de-mushroom as a perfume/aftershave if I could. |
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6. Do you tell people your views on mushrooms? |
| a) At every opportunity I vilify the evil mushroom and try to convert people to the FAF cause. I have no shame. |
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| b) No. Why? I'd be much too embarrassed and would probably give in to a well-argued pro-fungi case. |
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| c) No. I don't think about it, I just get on and eat them. |
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| d) I sing the praise of the wonderful mushroom and advocate its inclusion in every well-balanced diet. Long live the mushroom. |
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7. How do you deal with someone who hates mushrooms? |
| a) I embrace them as a brother/sister and persuade them to join FAF. |
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| b) I say hi and get on with my life. I might tell them about FAF if they were trying to chat me up and I wanted to get rid of them. |
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| c) Tell them they're daft but it won't interfere with our friendship. I wouldn't put mushrooms in their food - unless I forgot. |
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| d) Beat them over the head with the metaphorical stick of pro-fungal belief, and try to slip mushrooms into their dinner. |
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8. How do you deal with someone who loves mushrooms? |
| a) Shun them, but not before procuring an unflattering photo of them for the FAF website. |
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| b) They'd probably still be my friend. |
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| c) Share my favourite fungal recipes with them. |
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| d) Laugh maniacally and lure them into my mushroom-loving inner circle, where we plot the downfall of FAF. |
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