The Lord of the Rings:The Fellowship of the Ring (Part 1)
~Written by Ethian~
(Frodo is reading a magazine in the woods...)
Frodo: HAHAHAHA! Cryptonite... I get it!!! HAHA!
(He hears a wagon coming...)
Frodo: Gee, that must be Gandalf! I don't know how I know... But it is! Hey, you! Yeah, you! You're late!
Gandalf: No I'm not.
Frodo: Are too.
Gandalf: Are not!
Frodo: ARE TOO!
(This continues for a LONG time)
Frodo: Are not!
Gandalf: Are too!
Frodo: Gotcha!
Gandalf: Darn...
Frodo: Can we go to the party now?
Gandalf: Sure
(Later that night)
Bilbo: Look, I can blow smoke!
Gandalf: Ha! I can do it better!
Bilbo: *Just wait until I'm done with smoking classes... Then you'll see*
(At the party...)
Gandalf: Ugh, I hate hobbits... they always want to see the fireworks... Oh well, I'll just leave them here unguarded and I'm sure no one will go near them.
Merry: *Snickers*
Gandalf: What was that?
Pippin: Ummm... Just some hobbits hiding until you're gone so we can snatch some-
(Merry interrupts)
Merry: Shut up, Pippin! (then to Gandalf)It was nothing!
Gandalf: Oh, I thought so.
Bilbo: I'm leavin'!
Hobbits: Bu-bye!
*Poof*
Hobbits: Hey, that was cool! Do it again, do it again! Ummm... Bilbo?
Female hobbit: EEEEEKKK! He must have dissappeared and gone home to pack and then leave the Shire and end up in Rivendell!
Her husband: Have you been reading the script again?
wife: ummm... no, why would you ever think that?
husband: right....
(Back at Bilbo's house)
Bilbo: haha, that was fun, maybe i should go back and do it again... nah, that darned woman always knows what happens...
Gandalf: BOO!
Bilbo: EEEEKK!
Gandalf: hahaha, i knew that you would be here... so somehow i beat you here!
Bilbo: Darn, caught...
Gandalf: Give Frodo the ring, (Bilbo starts to say something, but Gandalf continues) i don't care that you're leaving w/out him knowing, just give him the ring!
Bilbo: I was gonna give it to you... but okay!
Gandalf: hey, wait...
(Bilbo leaves)
(Frodo comes back and Gandalf runs to him, panting)
Frodo: Why are you so tired?
Gandalf: I just tried to do Tae-Boe, lemme tell ya', not a good way to get an old wizzard back into shape... I tried to tell Saruman that it wouldn't work but... (Gandalf rambles on for some while)
Peter Jackson: Ummm... Ian.. we're doing a movie here, remember? If you're not in shape, deal with it!
Gandalf: oh, right, sorry... hey, wait a second!
Frodo: ummm.. do i get the ring or not?
Gandalf: oh yeah, here ya go, hide it and never put it on, don't ask why and don't find out!
Frodo: Okey-doke!
Sam: Is Gandalf gone yet?
Gandalf: NOPE! (pulls sam inside) Go with frodo or I'll turn you into a frog!
Sam: ummm... ok?
Frodo: hey, lets go through private property and hope no one sees us..
Sam: *Snicker* Yeah, we'll really be outlaws then!
(Merry, Pippin, Sam, and Frodo all collide)
Merry: Oh look, it's them
Pippin: who?
Merry: Who do ya think? It's frodo and sam!
Pippin: oh right, well, let's get them in trouble with Farmer Maggot too!
Merry: Good idea!
Frodo and Sam: hey...(but Merry and Pippin grab them and start running)
Frodo: Now remember, don't look ahead so we'll fall off a cliff!
others: right!
(they all trip and fall)
Pippin: ooh, Farmer Maggot must have forgotten about us... he's not following us anymore...
Merry: don't tell anybody, Pippin!
Pippin: oh, sorry.
hobbits: MUSHROOMS!!!
Frodo(ignoring the mushrooms): Wind is blowing leaves so that means that we have to get off the road!
(Everybody ignores him)
Frodo: ummm... NOW!!!
Sam: oh, right, something evil must be coming if Frodo senses it!
(Merry and Pippin share looks of humor)
Sam: What?
Merry: Nothing
Sam: What?!
Pippin: nothing
Sam What?!?!
Frodo: Sam, the movie, remember?
Sam: oh yeah, shouldn't we be hiding?
Frodo (starting to stress out): YES!
others: jeez, sorry...
(They all jump down under a tree's roots. The ringwaith just slowly walks into the scens, RIGHT after they hide)
Nazgul: Nope, I didn't see 4 hobbits just jump off the road... didn't see a thing...
Pippin (loudly): Hey, what's that thing that I can see that can't see me? EWWWW! BUGS!
Frodo: Run! I'm sure that we can out run the horse even though we're only 3 ft. tall!
others: Right!
Merry: To the bridge!
others: Right!
Frodo: Hey...(starts whining) I'm supposed to get ideas!
Sam (comfortingly): It's okay, Mr. Frodo, they didn't mean to hurt your feelings...
(Merry and Pippin exchange the same look as earlier)
Sam (now enraged): WHAT THE HECK DID I DO?!?!?
Frodo: Just ignore them, Sam, they're just trying to be annoying
Pippin: ummmm... Aren't we in a movie still?
(They all stop fighting, think for a minute, then decide Pippin's right)
Pippin: Now that we're in a public inn in Bree, I think I'll get drunk and tell everybody who i'm with and why...
Merry: me 2!
Sam and Frodo: Ok, we won't stop you.
Sam: There's somebody staring at us
Frodo: O goody! I love attention (then turn serious) I mean.... who could it be?
Pippin: ...yeah, sure. I know i'm not supposed to tell ya... but can you keep a secret?
Nasty, very unshaved/unbathed drunk: Of course!
Pippin: Good! well, frodo's over there, he's related to me in all sorts of nifty ways...
Frodo: *Ugh* I guess i'll go stop Pippin now... Hey, i'll put on my ring while i'm at it... Whoops, Stranger comin to get me...
Read on to Part 2!