Title: A JUMP TO THE LEFT
Author: Jenna Caine
E:Mail: jenna.caine@ntlworld.com
Rating: PG
Archive: Would be honoured. Just keep my details attatched and let me know where.
Category: Humour (I hope!)
Summary: A chance confession gives Scully an idea for Mulder's birthday.
Disclaimer: The much used property herein belong to CC and 1013. All others belong to R.o'Brien who hopefully will see the humour here. No infringement intended, just some fun.
Acknowledgments: To Caz & Webwych for the Beta - thanks again.

A JUMP TO THE LEFT.......

"Oh man!" Scully let out a little chuckle.

"What?" Mulder looked up from his work.

"Nothing."

"That wasn’t a nothing laugh," he narrowed his eyes.

"It’s...it’s just something I spotted in the paper," Scully folded the supplement she was reading and put it in her desk drawer.

"What have I told you about reading the Enquirer? You’re picking up far too many of my bad habits," he rolled his eyes to the ceiling in mock exasperation.

"Yeah...right...I haven’t got around to needing a copy of ‘Playboy’ in my bottom draw just yet though," threw back Scully with a smile.

"You should try the September issue," he started

"Mulder," she threw him the dead-pan.

"Ok, ok," he smirked. "So what is it?"

"Well, if you must know...it was an ad for the ‘Rocky Horror Picture Show."

"The Rocky Horror Picture Show?" he repeated, eyebrows raised.

"Yes?"

"I dunno, I just never figured you -"

"I wasn’t always this straight-laced -" Scully interrupted.

"I never said you were -"

"Yeah, but I could tell what you were thinking. Serious, sensible Dana Scully at a ‘Rocky’ screening," she leaned over her desk, eyeing him accusingly, hands on her hips.

"Scully, I would never make assumptions about you." Mulder looked mildly hurt. "But c’mon, ‘Rocky Horror’?" he grinned, leaning back in his chair.

"Mulder, I promise you it’s true," Scully giggled and sat down. "I used to go to the campus midnight screenings with friends. We would all dress up. I used to go as Magenta." She smiled at the memory.

"Who?"

"You know? Magenta!"

Mulder paused, thought for a moment then shrugged his shoulders holding his hands up. "Nope!"

"Oh you are kidding?" Scully was incredulous. "You mean you've never?"

"What I mean is I'm familiar with the movie's reputation, but I don't recall..." he trailed off, shifted uncomfortably in his seat and tried to go back to his work.

"What, never?" Scully eyed him with disbelief. "Mulder, what the hell did you do at college?"

"Studied, played a lot of sports," he looked almost embarrassed. "I suppose I thought it was the same for you."

Scully threw back her head and laughed long and hard. She was seeing Fox Mulder in a whole new light.

"So what do you think?"

"About what?" He didn’t look at her.

"About coming to see it with me?"

Mulder shook his head. "I don’t think so."

"Why not?"

"If you want to rent the video, I’ll buy the popcorn but -"

"No! no! no!...The whole point of this is to participate."

"Yeah! So I’ve heard."

"Awww c’mon Mulder. You’re not chicken are you?" she dared.

"Cluck, cluck," he looked straight at her, more than a little irritated. "No, I’m not chicken! Scully, it’s just not me. OK?"

Scully returned the gaze. "How about I treat you for your birthday?" She leaned across the desk.

Mulder leant back in his chair, gazed at her and sighed loudly. "I’m not that bothered."

"About your birthday, or about going?"

"Either."

"That’s settled then. I’m going to take you as a treat. You’ll have fun!"

"This is obviously some definition of the word "fun" that I’m not familiar with."

"Don’t be such an ‘Oscar’!"

"A what?"

"Oscar the Grouch!" Scully smiled teasingly.

"I like ‘Oscar the Grouch’, now there’s a guy with a fine perspective on life."

"Mulder; shut up!"

TWO WEEKS LATER: 3.30pm

"Mulder?" Scully leant over his shoulder and waved a white envelope under his nose. "Happy Birthday!"

"Oh, tell me you didn’t?" He looked up at her.

"I did, and we are!"

"I can’t..."

Scully’s face fell "You can! This is my treat, remember?"

"I know but -"

"Don’t even try to talk your way out of this one."

Mulder ran his fingers through his hair with an exasperated sigh. "OK: Fine: Whatever...but I’m not going to dress up!"

"It’s not compulsory Mulder."

"But if I don’t, I’m gonna look out of place aren’t I?"

"You’ll be fine."

"Are you?"

"Yes, but I’m not going to go as Magenta this time. I’m just a little bit too - well let’s just say that it wouldn’t suit me now. I think I’ll stick to ‘Janet’"

"Huh?"

"Janet?...Oh forget it. Just meet me at the theatre by 11.30pm."

"And I don’t have to dress?"

"No, just be there," Scully narrowed her eyes. "You know you can trust me?"

"You reckon?" Mulder pulled out the tickets out of the envelope and studied them forlornly. "And I definitely don’t have to dress up?"

"Whatever you’re comfortable in Mulder."

THE GOLDEN MOON MOVIE THEATRE
WEST 13TH STREET: 11.30PM

Scully paced the sidewalk outside the theatre nervously. Giving Mulder a fun night had seemed like a good idea at the time. But now, standing here in the chill of the October evening she was starting to wonder. He hadn’t said a lot after she produced the tickets. He could be stubborn at times, and a complete pain-in-the-ass, but she really wanted him to have some fun. She wanted them to have some fun, together, for a change. She checked her watch, 11.40. Where was he? She found herself checking every face in the considerable crowd that was starting to gather. Every cab that pulled up. No sign of him. Nothing! She started to feel a little foolish. She shouldn’t have pressured him. It was obviously not his thing.

The crowd started to file into the theatre. Every character was represented. Scully looked down at her own ensemble then at some of the other dozen or so Janets and their accompanying Brads. Would she end up going in on her own? She checked her watch again, 11.50 it read. Yep! Probably. Mulder wasn’t going to show. "Oh well," she sighed. "At least I can have some fun." But somehow it didn’t feel like fun anymore. "Maybe I can get a refund on my ticket?" she mused.

"I thought it was your turn?" A familiar voice at her back made Scully turn. Her eye’s widened - Frohike?

She was faced with a sight she had not expected. The Criminologist, Riff Raff and Magenta or rather Byers, Langly and Frohike. She had to put her hand to her mouth to stifle a shriek of laughter. Frohike was tugging at the hem of the short dress.

"Langly," he hissed. "You promised you’d wear this next -" his voice trailed off as they caught sight of her incredulous gaze.

Byers was the first to find his voice. "A..A..Agent Scully." he stammered nervously. "We hadn’t expected to see you here."

"Likewise." Scully felt herself blush, "I was waiting for someone."

A curious glance was exchanged between the men.

"Got yourself a Brad?" Frohike queried still tugging absently at his hem.

"Doesn't look like it." Scully smiled "Shame about the dress Frohike. You could have done the honours."

Frohike gave a wide smile "Hey pretty lady you only have to ask."

The cab pulled in very close to the kerb. Scully peered over. As the door opened a fish net clad foot steeped out onto the sidewalk, closely followed by another. A pair of glossy red patent, four-inch high stilettos were placed carefully down. Scully started to gaze up and down the road again. Still no sign of Mulder. She turned her attention back to the Stilettos. They were now occupied. Her eye's traveled from the gravity defying heels and up the fishnets. At about calf height the stockings turned into a trench coat. A very familiar trench coat...

"OH MY GOD!!!!!" she mouthed but no sound came out. Her eyes traveled up the trench coat. Don’t even go there!

Mulder sashayed across the sidewalk nonchalantly. Reaching down, he put his finger under her chin and closed her gaping mouth. "I’m not too late am I?"

Scully shook her head, too dumbfounded to answer.

"Hey Mulder? Not those shoes again?" Langly was grinning. "You know they make you walk like ‘Tootsie’!"

Scully looked up into Mulder’s eyes. They twinkled mischievously as he threw her one of his wickedest smiles. Never seen it huh!-Why you!

"Hey Scully!" he whispered. "Let’s do the Time Warp again?"